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The first time he outlines The Plan, Jason laughs and tells him he's crazy. Tim doesn't get upset, he just goes over it all again, explaining why it *will* work. He knows Jason by now, and he knows that if he's confident in The Plan and he lets Jason see that confidence, eventually the older boy will come around. Jason is stubborn, careful, suspicious, and protective...but he's *not* stupid.
And it's a *good* plan. Tim's been developing it ever since that first time Jason went out to get some smokes and came back with swollen lips and muddy knees and no cigarettes. Tim hadn't said anything, and that evening they'd had actual milk to drink, but as they'd curled together on the small, dirty mattress that night, he'd resolved to find a different way.
It hadn't happened again, though, at least not for awhile. Tim had started to wonder if he'd misread the situation, maybe things hadn't been what he'd thought...until finally it did happen again. Only that time Jason had come back wearing a false smile and walking oddly, carrying a bag of food and a box of cigarettes and pretending he'd found a fifty in the gutter.
The next time they'd started to run out of food and Jason was out of cigarettes, Tim found himself tensing every time Jason said he was going out. He'd started working harder than ever on The Plan, splitting his time between the library, looking at maps and working out patterns, and the streets, watching for the dealers and the muggers and Batman. It hadn't been that different from what he'd been doing before...except now, he was planning a *crime*.
It wasn't that he'd never done anything illegal. He'd learned fast that sometimes you didn't have a choice, and he'd proved he could plan a deliberately criminal act once already. But this wasn't the same thing, and he knew it. And with every day that went by, he had more trouble caring.
Finally there came a day when Jason had said, very casually, that he was going out for some smokes, and Tim had *known*.
* * *
"No."
Jason paused with his hand on the door. "What?"
"I don't want you to do that anymore."
Jason turned back to look at him, his expression unreadable. After a second, he turned to face Tim, but his eyes stayed locked in the distance. "What," he asked, "smoke?"
"No...well, that too, but--" Tim shook his head. "You *know* what I'm talking about." He tried to get into Jason's line of vision, but Jason ducked his head and turned away, refusing to meet his eyes.
"You're high. I don't know what you mean." His voice was flat, with a note of finality.
"Stop. Just...Jay," he reached out, gripping the other boy's arms and staring up at him.
Jason pulled against his hold, but Tim didn't let go. "We're *not* going to talk about this anymore." A note of warning underlay the words.
"I *don't* want you to do that ever again! Just...don't. Please. Not for cigarettes. Not for..." Tim swallowed. "For me."
"I'll do whatever I need to to keep us afloat," Jason said, his voice hard. His tone made something inside Tim swell - admiration for Jason's determination, maybe. Mostly anger, at Jason for his stubbornness, at the world for just *being* this way, forcing them into this position. At himself, for not being better, not perfecting his Plan faster, for dragging Jason down.
"I'd rather eat *garbage* than for you to have to do that. I'd rather *starve*, Jay!" Tim hit Jason on the chest hard enough to make his hand sting, but the other boy still wouldn't look at him. "Please!"
Jason frowned at Tim's shoulder, then said slowly, "I won't do anything unless...unless I absolutely have to."
That wasn't good enough. "Not at *all*--"
Jason looked up at him, suddenly, his eyes bright and fierce. "I'm not going to let anything--"
"I'll find another way, Jason," Tim insisted, cutting him off, because if he had to listen to Jason actually *say* he was doing this for Tim... It was getting harder and harder to justify staying here with him. "Let me try to find another way," Tim begged. "Promise me you won't--"
"I can't make that promise," Jason said, and abruptly pushed past Tim and out the door.
* * *
He hadn't made that promise because he'd known perfectly well he wouldn't keep it. It really hadn't been long at all before he'd tried again, only that time Tim had followed him, *stopped* him.
That day any reservations he'd had about the criminal aspects of The Plan had evaporated entirely. Jason was *never* going to have to do that again, he'd promised himself. Never going to have to bend over or get on his knees for some bastard like that ever again. No matter what it took.
The truth is that Jason doesn't like hurting other people...even though he seems perfectly willing to let other people hurt *him*, if he thinks he has to. But Jason will do things for other people that he'd never do for himself, subject himself to horrible things, break his own moral code, go against his own rules. Tim's learning now that he's the same way, deep down. It's one more thing they've got in common. He'd do almost anything to keep Jason safe.
Which is why he's sitting on this roof now, across town from Jason, gazing into an alley and waiting for Jason's signal.
And sweating.
He shouldn't be sweating, it's still cold, even if it hasn't been quite as frigid lately. But he can't help it, can't help fidgeting nervously, can't help fingering the two-way radio they picked up from the Salvation Army with some of the cash they'd stolen from that creepy john.
Batman sweeps past below him, and Tim stills and breathes a small sigh of relief and squashes down the small part of him that still longs for his camera. Batman *is* here, which means he's not where Jason is. He won't catch Jason stealing the cash...*just* the cash...from the apartment belonging to the drug dealer Batman busted almost an hour ago.
This is going to work, Tim tells himself, just as Jason's voice sounds, quiet and tinny, from the radio. "Mission accomplished. No problems. Meet you back at base in forty-five." He sounds excited.
Tim smiles, relief coursing through him.
"Roger."
This is going to work.
* * *
They're back in their squat before they speak to each other. As soon as they're inside, Jay carefully upends the bag on the table, spilling out twenties and fives and hundreds into a small pile. "It worked, Tim! We did it. We did it!" he says, jubilant, before grabbing Tim and kissing him. Tim's paralyzed - he's *not* going to mess this up, he thinks, but the thought keeps him from moving, keeps him stiff and unresponsive against Jason's lips.
Abruptly Jason pushes him away. "Jesus, I'm sorry, kid. I'm sorry--"
"It's all right, Jason--" he starts to say, but Jason interrupts.
"No, I..." he backs up another step. "I didn't mean to, I--"
As if Tim hasn't wanted this, *desperately* wanted it, for *weeks* - laid awake at night and just listened to Jason *breathe.* "It's all right, Jason--" He steps forward, but Jason just keeps backing up as Tim approaches.
"It's not. I promised you you wouldn't have to do that kind of shit with me, and--"
"What if I want to?" Tim says softly, cutting him off, and Jason stops, his hands still raised in a placating gesture.
"I--what?"
"I want to, Jason." And he grabs Jason's arms until Jason lets himself be pulled closer, close enough that Tim can tilt his head up and lean forward and clumsily press his lips to Jason's again.
It's Jason's turn to freeze, but he only does so for a split second, then he's wrapping his arms around Tim, pulling him closer and guiding the kiss into something deeper, hotter. Tim hears himself make a desperate little sound and clutches at Jason's shoulders.
Suddenly Jason laughs against his mouth. Tim jerks back, searching his eyes.
"I'm sorry," says Jason. "I just feel like...God, I feel like I should be *your* bitch, considering how much you just brought in--"
That...hurts. Tim knows Jason's kidding, but he doesn't ever want Jason to think of him like that, like he's *using* him. He scowls at Jason, gripping the other boy's arms with all of his strength. "It's not funny. You're...you're my *partner*."
Jason stops laughing, and looks down at Tim with a thoughtful frown on his face before pulling him close again. "Yeah," he says. "Partners."