Work Text:
“You… are married.”
“I’m… sorry?”, Steve asked, raising an eyebrow. It’s been just a day after he was unfrozen. SHIELD decided to keep at base for a while. They said it was to keep a close eye on his health and memory, something about 'adjustment counseling'. It was all pretty confusing. Steve thought it was ridiculous, the physical health and memory monitoring at least. The serum perfected those. But they had a point with the counseling. They decided it was best to put him through it when he broke most of the punching bags in the training room. It wasn't Steve's fault, he was just lost in thought... The love of his life died just a week ago. And now he's in a completely new century. And even then, he wasn't handling the loss well, traveling all over Europe to destroy HYDRA bases one by one.
I'm not gonna stop until all of HYDRA is dead or captured.
To Steve, it’s just been one day after the war. To Steve, it’s just been one day after he crashed the plane into the arctic. And now, everyone he was young with yesterday is now dead or dying. And it's only been a week since he lost him...
Given the position he was in, Steve was genuinely grateful for everything they gave him. Last time someone visited him in this room, they were getting him set up in the city. They helped him buy a car, look at apartments online, they did so much.
This afternoon, Fury and Agent Hill came to his room. Steve thought it’d be a regular, ol’ wellness check. Their faces screamed something Steve couldn’t really tell. Fury’s expression was as usual, as serious as ever. On the surface, the same case seemed to be for Maria…
She turned to Fury before looking back at Steve. “After you and Sergeant James Barnes died, your apartment was cleaned out. Our agents back then found numerous sketchbooks and love letters.” She slid a manila folder over to Steve at the table. Steve took it, flipped through the files one by one. The folder didn’t have the sketchbooks, said those were being kept at the Smithsonian. Rather, it had pictures of little drawings and notes Steve and Bucky gave to each other.
“In 1993,” Fury started, “same-sex marriage was brought to the attention of the Hawaii Supreme Court. That was a stepping stone. And when people at Smithsonian Air and Space released your files to the public shortly after, timing they claim was unrelated, the public discovered something.” Steve lifted his head, slowly looking Fury in the eye. “That you two were in love.” What Fury said was simple. It was the truth. Steve didn’t know what to say. He thought they were subtle. They probably lowered their guard around Buck’s sisters, but didn’t think they’d come to that conclusion.
Steve’s hands shook when he picked up a picture of what looked like a crowd or a mob. “For about a decade, you were used as a prime example of queer erasure in history. In the end, after riot after riot, Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes were posthumously married in 2004.” Steve’s mind was reeling. After all these years. All the nights whispering in their apartment, making ‘what-ifs’ on what they'd do if they were married. All the days spent at the forest lake on the outskirts of the city.
For a moment, Steve gets lost in the memory. Bucky would always sit against a tree and read all the books he wanted. That was always something Steve noticed, the way Bucky's face looked when he was reading. Steve himself would sketch anything his heart desired. In other words, he would draw Bucky, who his heart most desired.
The forest was far enough from the city, the only place where they didn't need to call each other "pal" or "buddy." Here, they were just lovers, plain and simple. They'd bring a picnic blanket and a basket of food, staying from early afternoon to sunset. The sunset reflecting in Bucky's eyes was the prettiest thing Steve had seen. All the time in the world could pass and they wouldn't notice. There was a certain evening he was trying to draw Bucky in secret. Bucky snatched the paper right out of his hands. Not meanly, just playfully. Curiously.
A special gleam in Bucky's eyes shone when he fully looked at the drawing. Steve couldn’t fully understand it before he ripped the paper outta Bucky’s hands. Bucky muttered an apology, saying he just wanted to look. After a moment of consideration, Steve handed the paper back. Bucky gently took it and stood up to spin around. He smiled. Steve always loved Bucky’s smile. There was just something about Bucky that was so captivating, the way light always reflected in his eyes. He was a boy as bright as the sun.
Steve turned his attention back to the situation at hand. “S-So gay marriage is legal now?” He bet he looked desperate, and he wasn't too sure his voice didn't break when asking the question.
“Not fully. In Massachusetts, yes,” Maria confirmed.
Fury slowly started to pace around the room, “Barnes’ sisters gave their testimonies, said you two weren’t subtle. We received original documents on shared residency, the medical insurance he had you on, and his will explicitly stating you were to inherit his possessions and half his wealth.”
Medical insurance… Shit. That’s right, Bucky would always come home exhausted from a day at the docks. He always said he was happy to do it. When Steve’s ma contracted tuberculosis from the hospital, it was Bucky who bought the cough syrup.
He’d help out in the kitchen, learned how to make “a proper apple tart,” Ma would say. Irish stew too. Dammit, Bucky didn’t even hesitate to cuddle up with Steve when he got Scarlet Fever. Steve would feel his face heat up when he'd whisper little things. "It's okay, I swear, we'll get through this." "Please, breathe. Breathe, Stevie, please, I can't- I don't know what I'd do if you..."
And when Ma died, Bucky’s shifts doubled. He worked so hard to provide for himself and for his 'special guy'. To get Steve out of that tenement, to afford his asthma meds, to pay for their apartment, and groceries, and-
“Can I,” Steve suddenly blurted out before pausing. “Can I have a moment?”
“Of course,” Fury responded. Maria left the files on the table. She then took something else out. The first edition of The Hobbit. The exact same book that Steve bought Bucky in 1937. Steve takes it, touching it tenderly. Maria headed out.
It was a long, cramped journey by boat, from Brooklyn, New York to Dublin, Ireland. It took about seven days before Steven even reached land. It was a year after his mother’s death, and he had still been mourning. Steve walked into that bookshop, the one his mom would go to every time before, the one at the side of the sea.
He went to the new releases section. He knew Bucky was stressed with work, bills, and his own family stuff. Steve figured something new to read would help take Bucky's mind off things. He didn't wanna pick out anything too stressful, Bucky needed something fun. That's when he saw The Hobbit in 'New Releases'. It was a fantasy book, one for kids. He stared at the cover, but that itself didn't say much. Just a seaweed green cover. There was a winged and tailed creature at the bottom, and mountains at the top, along with a sun and moon. Steve hoped it wasn't too ridiculous to get for his twenty-year-old guy. Agh, who cares? Steve bought the book. He wrote a note on the inner cover, dotting his i's with stars, and wrapped it with brown paper and twine.
Steve took a deep breath in. And out... He opened the book up, expression melting into a smile as he gently brushed a hand over the first page. He murmured something soft.
"My one, my only, my Bucky..."
--
The
Hobbit
Happy third anniversary, James baby Bucky Buck!
On the night you first kissed me, you rushed me back to the tenement to calm my asthma attack. I'd never admit it in real life, but I was terrified I'd actually die. The thunder was deafening, the humidity in the air made my lungs feel like they were on fire, and you were the one keeping me breathing. Keeping me alive.
Having you nurse me back to health, pray for me when you haven't prayed in years, and kiss me gently made me feel more loved than anything anyone else has ever done for me. That's when I realized I'm never gonna find anyone that loves me this much.
Hope you like this book! I thought you could use something fresh and new. Apparently, it's not even out in the states yet!!!
Till the end of the line,
Your punk
Your special guy
Your Stevie