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What is the number one requirement for all parties? Music, obviously. It sets the tone, it sets the atmosphere and, arguably most important, it sets the mood. Ever since MC had joined the ranks, the RFA parties were becoming more and more of a to-do, and less of a stuffy gathering of rich people. In fact, most of the stuffy rich people were the hosts themselves. There was Jumin’s wealth, Seven’s ridiculous collection of mustangs and being a rising starlet had most definitely increased Zen’s earnings as well.
The others may not have been stuffy per se, but as Zen watched Jumin squint at the cheerful pop music playing from the DJ’s booth, he could only sigh. Jumin was just not hip and with it. When Zen’s career took off because of the leaked (read: hacked, thanks Seven) cover of Let it Go being released to YouTube, Jumin thought it was an original song and asked where Zen’s songwriting talents had come from. He also offered him a job. Something about writing business documents, since his writing skill was so fluent. Zen shivered at the memory.
No, it was time for an intervention. Make Jumin Han cool. Zen was just such a nice young man, he couldn’t bear to let his stale comrade live out his life in such a colorless way. Or maybe the idea came from Jaehee’s clear, ever present exhaustion. Either way, a change was in order.
Zen took a swig of whatever was in his glass and rolled his shoulders. It was time to request a song from the DJ. It was going to unfortunately rain on Seven and MC’s parade, as they spun giddily in circles with Yoosung on the dance floor. The time for Zen had come. More specifically, the time for Jumin to realize what the world had to offer. Definitely not just what Zen had to offer. Zen wasn’t attracted to broody, moody men in suits. Not at all. That’s gross. That’s disgusting.
“Where are you going?” Jumin asked, frowning as Zen stood from his seat beside him.
“You’ll see, Mr. Han.”
Jumin stared quizzically after him as he crossed the room. His frown deepened when Yoosung took his arm and tried to get him to join in with the dancing, but he was surprised when Zen shrugged him off. That was a man on a mission. He could get behind -- uh, no -- he could respect that. Jumin was driven by purpose. That was a very admirable trait to anyone else who could possibly share it.
Nonchalantly, he continued to observe the wild Zen ™. The silverette made his way to the DJ booth after no small amount of Seven and MC stalling and leaned against the table in a very suave manner. He exchanged some words with the DJ, unintelligible to Jumin from the distance, and turned back towards the banquet area with a pleased look on his face. That was very concerning. Zen had told Jumin he could understand, right? Then why was he so confused?
The DJ turned down the music currently playing (something Beaver and Snake? Something about refrigerated water?) and held the microphone to his lips.
“How’s everyone doing tonight?” Jumin opened his mouth to reply, but the DJ wasn’t looking for an answer and kept talking. “Good? Good. So this one is a very special request -- not one that I would think a fundraising party would typically ask for, but hey you guys have been surprising me all night. So, without further ado, Super Bass by the queen Nicki Minaj as requested by the resident celebrity himself Zen!”
Jumin leaned over towards Jaehee curiously, “Super Bass? Does that mean the bass is up? Will this shake the room?”
Jaehee massaged her temples, “It’ll shake my sanity, that’s for sure.”
Zen continued his stride over to Jumin as the music began to play. Jumin absently wondered if there was a subliminal message to be found here.
“It sounds pleasant so far.” He remarked, having to speak a little louder than normal over the music. Jaehee didn’t seem to be listening, gaze fixated solely on Zen. Jumin followed her eyes and saw what looked like the positioning for an upcoming dance routine. Was he going to...?
Seven caught on instantly apparently and tugged at Yoosung to get him to join in before they both shoved MC into a seat. Jumin overheard Seven’s boisterous voice insisting: “You’ll cause these men to stumble if you try to join in, babe.” He was backing up to the dance floor and tripped a little himself. “I mean, look, just by being you you’re causing me to stumble already.” MC laughed, though Jumin thought the joke was a little low class. Kind of like Seven himself.
That’s when the rapid fire of words began.
This one is for the boys with the booming system
Top down, AC with the cooling system
When he come up in the club, he be blazin' up
Honestly, Jumin didn’t really keep up with Zen’s work. He was aware of the idol status he held, but not really of the skill set he possessed. Other than writing skills. Mmm that let it go song could move a nation.
Anyways, when Zen’s hips started moving to the rhythm, he completely stole any and all attention away from his ridiculous backup dancers. It was... mesmerizing.
Got stacks on deck like he savin' u
And he ill, he real, he might got a deal
He pop bottles and he got the right kind of bill
Zen made hand gestures like something akin to throwing money at a strip club. Not that Jumin had ever been to a strip club. Ever. His eyes never left Zen, widening slightly when Zen shot a wink at him. It was at him. There was no mistaking it. That feeling about a subliminal message from earlier overwhelmed Jumin a little. Was this... about... A chill shook his spine.
He cold, he dope, he might sell coke
He always in the air, but he never fly coach
“Assistant Kang,” Jumin whispered, “Have I ever flown coach before?”
“No sir.”
Suddenly, he was right in front of them, and the wealthy businessman was finding it hard to breathe. From far away, he hadn’t really noticed anything more than the obscene dance movements. He hadn’t realized the overnight sensation was lip syncing the lyrics as well. Now that he was so close, Jumin’s eyes scanned over Zen’s lethal figure. One of his hands rested on his knee and the other gripped at a dainty napkin harshly.
He a motherfucking trip, trip, sailor of the ship, ship
When he make it drip, drip kiss him on the lip, lip
As he said the line about the lips, Zen touched a finger to Jumin’s pair with a boop. Jumin’s lips hadn’t stopped stinging since.
That's the kind of dude I was lookin' for
And yes you'll get slapped if you're lookin' hoe
Another point in Jumin’s direction, and an unexpected but playful slap at Jaehee who visibly recoiled in shock. What he did next was quite possibly the most shocking of it all.
I said, excuse me, you're a hell of a guy
I mean my, my, my, my you're like pelican fly
He sat himself down on Jumin’s lap, kicking his legs innocently. Then he reached for Jumin’s suit tie and tugged... hard .
I mean, you're so shy and I'm loving your tie
You're like slicker than the guy with the thing on his eye, oh
Referencing the guy meant that Zen had to stand back up, sauntering over to V who sat beside the MC looking VERY confused. I mean, he wasn’t looking, he was blind after all. But he wasn’t deaf and the gasps from the audience and sinful music were enough to make him blush.
Yes I did, yes I did, somebody please tell him who the F I is
I am Nicki Minaj, I mack them dudes up, back coupes up, and chuck the deuce up
Zen danced backwards quickly, a devilish grin spreading across his features. Yoosung looked pleased at the indirect insults to V, which was completely unacceptable to Seven. Seven shoved Yoosung off the dance floor with some muffled, “YOU WANNA FIGHT? YOU WANNA FIGHT, BRO?” Not so muffled, but all Jumin could hear was the song as Zen began to do the dance the starlet had soaked up from watching the music video a couple hundred thousand times.
Boy, you got my heartbeat runnin' away
Beating like a drum and it's coming your way
Can't you hear that boom, badoom, boom, boom, badoom, boom, bass?
You got that super bass
Boom, badoom, boom, boom, badoom, boom, bass
Yeah, that's the super bass
“Assistant Kang?”
“Yes sir?”
“What is this song about?”
“Well, if I had to take a guess, it would be about a young woman who is intensely attracted to --”
“No, I mean, what is it really about? What is it for?”
“I mean, I didn’t get a lot of confessions in my education, but I would say Zen is making it clear that he has some strong, stereo-like feelings about you.”
He got that super bass.
“Any idea why?” Jumin asked, still completely focused on the provocative dance display in front of him.
“No sir. All that you have to offer is money and aesthetics which Zen already has.”
This one is for the boys in the polos.
Entrepreneurs and the moguls
He could ball with the crew, he could solo
But I think I like him better when he down low
And I think I like him better with the fitted cap on
He ain't even gotta try to put the mac on
“Assistant Kang, I am an entrepreneur.”
“Yes sir, I think we established that.”
He just gotta give me that look, when he give me that look
Then the panties comin' off, off, uh
Zen threw his coat jacket off and the MC caught it, laughing hysterically. Seven looked jealous, V didn’t look because he was blind, and Yoosung had been disposed of because of his disrespect for Seven’s master. Jumin blinked. He had never really noticed. How. Muscular. Zen was.
Excuse me, you're a hell of a guy you know I really got a thing for American guys
I mean, sigh, sickenin' eyes I can tell that you're in touch with your feminine side, oh
Yes I did, yes I did, somebody please tell him who the F I is
I am Nicki Minaj, I mack them dudes up, back coupes up, and chuck the deuce up
Jumin fidgeted uncomfortably in his seat. Maybe his assessment had been wrong. He wasn’t American. He looked away from Zen to look around the room for the first time, scanning for whoever that American could have been. He needed to purchase their company and demote them. This was unforgivable. This was Jumin’s song. Zen was not allowed to perform it for anyone else. Anyone. At all.
Zen noticed Jumin’s attention diverting and it concerned him. That hadn’t been part of the plan. What was he looking at? Zen thought he had him. Hook line and sinker. Thankfully the song was drawing to a close, which meant it was time for the bridge. He slid on his knees towards Jumin’s seat and Jumin’s eyes opened so wide he thought they were going to roll out of his skull.
See I need you in my life for me to stay
Zen took the hand resting on Jumin’s thigh and gripped it tightly within his own. He was panting from all the dancing, and very aware of his cheeks flushing deeply.
No, no, no, no, no, I know you'll stay
No, no, no, no, no, don't go away
Jumin audibly gulped, expression never changing, attention never diverting. Zen didn’t know whether this was good or bad. He also didn’t know when this had gone from a joke to a very very serious matter.
Boy, you got my heartbeat runnin' away
Don't you hear that heartbeat comin' your way?
Oh, it be like, boom, badoom, boom, boom, badoom, boom, bass
He rose to his feet again, this time taking Jumin with him which surprised everyone, but no one more than Zen and Jumin themselves. Zen took Jumin’s hand and pressed it against his shirt to feel the pounding of his heart. His proof of existence.
Can't you hear that boom, badoom, boom, boom, badoom, boom, bass?
The room fell totally quiet. The DJ didn’t play another song, the rest of the RFA was entirely dumbstruck, and the guests were just amazed at the wonderful entertainment this group had managed to put on for them. They couldn’t wait to go home and rate it on YELP!
Zen released Jumin’s hand and stumbled back, still breathing heavily and eyes searching desperately for any kind of reaction on the man’s blank face. “Well?”
Jumin’s hand was frozen in the position from where it had been resting on Zen’s heart and their gazes finally met, “Is there something you want me to say?”
Zen deflated. He was mortified. He couldn’t believe he had gotten so carried away and --
Jumin stepped forward, “Because my father always told me that I should let my actions speak louder than words.”
There was only a split second for the star to process what that could possibly mean, especially coming from such a cold person, before the action was made.
Jumin’s velvety smooth lips met Zen’s in a rather uncharacteristic manner, and Zen’s brain stuttered to life before he began to kiss vehemently in return.
It continued for what felt like a century, and the room erupted into roars of applause.
“What’s happening?” V asked Seven, in a low whisper.
“I don’t know, when I figure it out I’ll let you know.” Or show him, but that's another story.
“Do you have plans for the evening?” Jumin asked, huskily when they broke apart.
“ You .” Came the hoarse, seductive reply.