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Before, when Charlie thought she was a sinner, they were careful to avoid the topic of her past.
It was taboo for Sinners to discuss their past unless they brought it up first, which was probably the only thing that saved Vaggi those first few months before she could come up with a story cobbled together from half remembered truths.
After, when her secret was revealed, Charlie does not ask because it’s taboo for other reasons.
(There is no manual for 'so your girlfriend is a Fallen Angel')
Heaven wasn't all bad, something Vaggi repeatedly stressed when she felt brave enough to talk, and would sprinkle details of the little shops, the laughter, the cute animals.
Which is how they ended up discussing the stars.
"Did you ever see the stars? Up in Heaven? You must have been so close to them." Charlie asks her one night as they stare at the red haze and glowing beacon of Heaven and oh Vaggi realizes what a gift she has to give, for this lonely girl who saw the sky but never saw the stars.
She spends night after night describing constellations and galaxies, nebulas and binary stars.
A better view than any earthly creature could even hope to view. There was a Winner, one she ran into a few times, who had been an astronomer when he was alive. He babbled endlessly, so excited to have his theories proved correct, ecstatic to be able to watch the birth and death of the stars he had spent his life chasing; he did not even realize the times he saw her were few and far between and did not even think to ask about her. (He reminded her of Pentious, she realized belatedly, and wondered if by some fluke of luck the two of them had managed to meet each other.)
It was her father's greatest creation (if asked, he would say that she was his greatest creation but she did not ask and he would speak fondly of them so she was left with her assumptions, incorrect as they were) and Charlie had never seen it.
Vaggi really tried her best, but words were never her strong suite, descriptions less so. (What use does a soldier have for poetry?)
____________
There are mortal legends of a man named Icarus, who fell in love with the sun. He died trying to reach it, built himself wax wings and plummeted to the sea below when he got too close.
Her father said it was a cautionary tale about trying to reach beyond yourself, aiming for things you can never hope to achieve.
Her mother said it was about loving something beyond your reach.
I fell in love with the stars, her mother's voice, the sing-song of a bedtime stories, a hand brushing hair out of her face, I was just lucky enough that they loved me back
Charlie fell in love with the stars, despite never seeing them.
She fell in love with an angel despite seeing them every year.
____________
So Vaggi learns to paint for her.
Spends countless nights in a spare room converted to a private studio (the hotel had one, but everyone had access to that, and she could walk in at any moment and it was supposed to be a surprise)
She presents it without flair or drama, although had their situations been reversed she is sure there would be at least three songs, and Charlie cries tears of happiness, brimstone pouring down her face.
She is a poor artist, knows there are beings in hell who could probably do better than her, but this is her memory, her gift to Charlie. What demon would do a better job, some half remembered whorls on black paint?
(An angel’s memory is flawless. It is a blessing and a curse.)
“Vaggi, this is-” Charlie reaches out, as if she could touch the stars painted on the canvas and feel their warmth. “I’ve heard- I mean I’ve asked them to describe it to me before, but blurry photos and piecemeal memories aren’t the same thing.”
(This is something she’s come to learn of Charlie. There is no price to stay at the Hazbin Hotel but her very nature demands contracts, an accord of some kind. So she asks to share memories.
She learns, through Charlie, that Angel has no memories of the stars, blocked by smog and streetlights. And besides, he had no patience for the night sky, too tied down to the concrete earth.
Learns that Husk has memories of stars, but they are not positive ones, since when the stars come out the jungle comes alive and that everything that wants to kill you gets a better advantage. The stars were the territory of the enemy.
Of course Alastor loves the stars as well. The perfect light to hunt, the bayou alive to those who knew her sounds and the perfect time to do the work too dirty for the day.
Pentious had a telescope, occasionally pointed at the heavens, he was more concerned about the scientific endeavors of the stars, but it takes even the most cold hearted scientist to be unmoved by the great celestial workings of her father.
Cherri had a similar story to Angel, too tied to the concrete jungle to have any strong opinions on the celestial bodies. She does wistfully recall the rides in the outback however, the stars guiding their journey from the law.
Nifty… Charlie does not know how much of what was shared was fact or fiction, so she files it all under ‘Nifty Things’ in her mind and moves on.)
“I’m sure others have painted the night sky for you.” Vaggi says as they stare at her handiwork. Tries to downplay hours of mixing paint, of tearing canvas and nearly crying with frustration as the vision in her mind did not match the image before her. (It is but a simple task, undertaken to make Charlie happy – who cares how frustrating it is, if it made her smile in the end?)
“They have, it’s just.” Charlie pauses, weighing her words. (What a rare sight, the princess of hell, at a loss for words. For her.) “There's this sadness to the stars when they paint it. This lingering sense of nostalgia for something they will never see again. You can hear the longing in their voice when they try to describe it. This is- there’s a joy, a sense of awe and understanding. I-I can understand why my dad loves them so much, when I look at them. An angel’s view of creation.” She turns, leans in and kisses Vaggi. “What are you going to call it?”
“I think that’s as good a name as any.” Vaggi replies, “I mean, you’ve seen me and my attempts at naming.”
(“I love it, I love you, thank you.” Charlie kisses gently that night. “It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
“Most beautiful?” Vaggi raises an eyebrow.
“Second-most beautiful.” Charlie giggles, and kisses her again.)
An Angel’s View of Creation adornes the stairwell of the main lobby the next morning.
(Vaggi does not sign her name on the bottom.)
________________
She manages to pull off the impossible, for her. If only to get her to sit still for a few hours, amid the chaos of, well, everything.
"Where are we going?" Charlie hummed as Vaggi led her, blindfolded through a portal.
(When Sera pulls her aside after one of their negotiation meetings, outwardly calm but stumbles over her words so much Vaggi gets flashbacks to Charlie, and can see for the first time how Sera and Emily are related – she picks out the High Seraphim is apologizing and asking if there's anything she can do – to be cast down like that is reprehensible –
"N-not for me." Vaggi finds herself stuttering, "but there is one thing.")
"It’s a surprise, babe. You'll see when we get there." She said with a smile.
(It's more complicated than Vaggi realizes, the amount of paperwork it takes to get a demon to earth – especially one of Charlie's caliber. Sure, she could go on her own but that would break multiple interplanar laws and probably trigger an apocalypse or two and no one wanted that right now.
So, Sera had asked for a few days to get everything sorted and Vaggi agreed to wait.)
The landscape is so familiar Vaggi feels like they’re back in hell, like they never left, like this was all some cruel trick and Lute would pop out at any moment and try to take her other eye –
Cool desert air kisses her skin, colder than hell would ever allow itself to be and Vaggi blinks and looks up and smiles.
She gently removes the blindfold from Charlie’s face.
"Look up, babe."
Stars. An endless sea, a rolling carpet across the sky. More than one could count, its beauty indescribable. The longer you focused, tried to pick out even one detail, the more things jumped out at you, as if creation itself was vying for attention.
("Two hours. No contact." Sera had said. "The portal will open to a remote location. Leave no trace and if the High Council finds out she abused her time on earth..." she does not finish. She doesn't have to.)
"How'd you pull this off?" Charlie asked, wonder coloring her breath. She hasn’t looked down yet.
Vaggi shrugs, "Sera asked if there was anything she could do as uh, as an apology for," she waves her hand vaguely to her face "this."
That got her to break contact.
Charlie's eyes immediately begin to water. "And you asked for something for me?"
Of course, isn't said because it's so obvious. What else would she ask for? She has everything she could ever want in front of her.
All she wants – all she feels like she exists for now is to be there for Charlie. To love and appreciate and reciprocate even an ounce of the undeserved kindness Charlie showed her.
(The fact that she is an angel, even called that, is ironic. She is more demon than any in hell, and yet its princess set her aside as something to covet. What is there not to love?)
“Well Adam is dead, and I don’t really… want to go back to Heaven?” She’s trying to explain. She knows Charlie is very big on communication and they’ve had their fair share of this argument in the past (although couched under the lie of I don’t want to be redeemed I want to be with you so maybe it’s worth re-visiting?) “I know it’s your dream to get people there babe, but everything I could ever want I already have.” She pulls her in, “with you.”
Miraculously, Charlie manages to contain her water works. It takes a lot of effort and Vaggi shows her appreciation by kissing the little red dimples that would usually be wet with tears at this point.
They lay on the desert floor, on the blanket Vaggi had so thoughtfully brought and Charlie points out constellations she’s only read about, Ursa Major and Minor, Gemini, Virgo, tells the stories of Orion and the Seven Maidens read to her at bedtime by her mother, whispers secrets of creation learned at her father’s knee, able to experience them from up close for the first time.
“I want to try something.” Charlie says suddenly, and sits up.
She holds her hands out in front of her and Vaggi sits as well, watching with no small curiosity as Charlie closes her eyes and scrunches her face in the way she does when she’s really trying to concentrate on something.
Starlight blooms between her palms and when she exhales the dark matter of space and the shimmer of stardust comes out. When she opens her eyes, they are pure white.
“Charlie!” Vaggi’s hand shoots out but the glow is already fading. Charlie rests her head on Vaggi’s shoulder.
“Look up.” Charlie said, a faint echo carrying in her voice.
Vaggi feels her mouth grow dry. “I-Charlie-what?”
There is a new constellation in the sky, opposite Orion, the Hunter. A small collection, roughly the shape of a heart, (or an eye, or a wing. It’s four or five stars roughly in a wobbly line – something Vaggi learned about constellations is that you can make it any shape you want really.)
“I was going for a star but I got a little carried away. What do you think?” Charlie grins, lifting her head to look at her “You gave me a painting, I give you a constellation."
Vaggi can’t help but laugh at the absurdity of the situation. So much for ‘leave no trace’.
“They’re gonna be so mad.” She giggles hysterically.
Charlie rolls her eyes, “There’s literally countless stars – well I’m sure my dad has a count somewhere actually – there’s too many stars for them to notice this one. It’s my little gift to you.”
“Dork.” Vaggi hits her on the chest with no force behind it. Charlie tugs her arms and brings her in for a hungry kiss.
“What should we call it?” Charlie asks when they break, “We’re the first to document this strange new constellation that was totally here before.”
Vaggi hums, carding her fingers through Charlie’s hair as she thinks.
“How about the Spear?” She says, “It kind of looks like one.”
“Aw, you named it after your favorite weapon? That’s so Vaggi.” Charlie grins, and her eyes begin to glow again.
“I name thee Spear, shine evermore, Defender of Love.” She intones.
The earth shook with the proclamation.
Vaggi let her head fall back.
“We’re going to be in so much trouble from Sera.” She whispers but then Charlie is kissing her again and most thoughts leave her mind.
_____
(Mama, Charlie whispers, am I Icarus? Or the Sun?
She is dreaming of course, so there is no answer.)
_____