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Physical pain was a common thing in Bokuto's life. Mundane. Just an occupational hazard, after all.
From bumps and scratches on the training ground to sword thrusts and arrows in battle. Such was life as a knight of the palace.
Bokuto was not afraid of pain. Sometimes she herself thought she wasn't even afraid of death. Her father had told her that was a good thing, many years ago, when she was barely a child who couldn't even bear the weight of a shield but already longed to wield her own sword.
"To be a knight means your life is no longer your own, my daughter. It now belongs to the kingdom." Her father had told her that time she wore armor for the first time.
Why was she remembering that right now?
"Bokuto!" She heard her name from very far away, as if wrapped in a thickness that didn't let her distinguish the tone or origin clearly. "Bokuto, for the love of god, wake up already!"
The voice became clearer, as did the rest of the things around her. From deep darkness, she transitioned to a dim light that made her eyes hurt, then a blurry silhouette over her face. It took her long seconds to adjust her vision, get used to the candlelight, and make out Konoha's face.
"She woke up." Was the first thing the blonde said upon seeing her General open her eyes, first like a relieved sigh, then, an almost euphoric shout. "She woke up!"
Bokuto was surrounded by her subordinates and friends so fast that she struggled to understand what was happening. Komi, Washio, Sarukui, the rookie Onaga; some crying and others threatening to do so, showering Bokuto with a bunch of questions that the two-toned haired woman could barely distinguish.
"Silence, please, silence." The palace doctor approached to quiet them. "This is no place for shouting, I need everyone to lower their voices."
It was then that Bokuto finally paid attention to where she was. An unfamiliar bed with rough sheets beneath her. Shelves full of jars of different colors and sizes. Bookshelves crammed. An unmistakable scent of medicine. The palace infirmary.
Bokuto looked down at her own body, noticing the thick bandages wrapped around her torso, a significant part of her abdomen, and crossing over her shoulder towards her back.
"And you, please don't get up." The doctor scolded her the moment she saw her try to sit up in bed. "You must avoid moving or the wounds will open again."
"What happened?" Bokuto asked. Her memory was jumbled.
She remembered being with the rest of her comrades patrolling around the palace. Security reinforced for the occasion of Princess Akaashi's investiture as future queen, lots of guests, and cheerful music.
Then, an explosion. The celebration was left unfinished. The court filled with enemies and screams of panic in seconds, and Bokuto had no choice but to draw her sword and fight fiercely, like the warrior and champion she was, enemies falling before her and the edge of her sword.
But she noticed an archer in the distance, near the roof, his arrow aimed directly at...
"The Princess!" Bokuto kicked off the blankets and pillows trying to get out of bed, completely panicked. "I have to go see the princess!"
"General, calm down!"
"Bokuto, control yourself, you're going to hurt yourself more!"
"Stop moving, you'll open your wounds!"
Both the rest of the knights and the doctor tried to calm Bokuto down and hold her to keep her from getting out of bed, but she kept fighting and struggling as if her life depended on it.
"Let me go, I have to go see if the princess is okay!"
"Her Highness is fine, you blockhead, now lie down!"
"I have to see her!"
"General, calm down now!"
"No, I have to go to her!"
"What is all this commotion!?"
The room went silent. With the fighting and shouting, no one noticed when the door was opened, nor when Princess Akaashi entered.
"Your Highness!" Konoha said, hurried and nervous, making a bow that was then imitated by the rest of those present.
Except for Bokuto. She remained lying down and still, watching Akaashi and her magnificent, elegant bearing. She still wore the dress she had used during the coronation ceremony, the long earrings and the tiara arranged with absolute neatness in her dark hair that barely brushed her shoulders, now bare due to the lack of the royal mantle.
The princess swept the room with a gaze sharper than any dagger Bokuto had ever faced, her eyebrows furrowed and lips pressed into a straight line that commanded respect.
"Everyone," she spoke without needing to raise her voice. "Out of here."
It wasn't necessary for her to repeat it. The doctor was the first to leave, followed by Bokuto's companions in an orderly line, all making a slight bow to Akaashi upon leaving the room. Onaga was the last to go, carefully closing the door behind her, leaving the princess and the knight alone.
"Your Highness, are you alright-?" Bokuto didn't delay in expressing her concern as soon as they were alone, but she was interrupted mid-sentence.
Akaashi, the elegant princess of exquisite bearing and refined manners, ran, dragging her dress across the floor, and threw herself onto the bed, wrapping her knight in her arms.
"You gave me a terrible scare." Whispered the princess, her voice on the verge of breaking.
Bokuto felt Akaashi's grip on her injured skin and the sigh of relief she let out, her face buried in the knight's neck. Her hands hovered near the princess's shoulders without touching her, still in surprise at the sudden act of affection, wondering if it would be right to simply return the gesture.
Unfortunately, Bokuto hesitated too long, and before she had the chance to return the hug, Akaashi pulled back. The distance between them was short, the princess sitting on the edge of the bed with her face impassive, as if what just happened never did.
"Are you okay?" Akaashi asked.
"Yeah, a bit uncomfortable because of the bandages. They itch a lot." Bokuto said, half complaint and half joke. "It's not important. How are you, Your Highness?"
"You were hit with a poisoned arrow in the chest." The princess reproached with furrowed brows. "Of course it's important."
"I care more about how you are. It wouldn't be the first time someone aimed a poisoned arrow at me and hit the mark."
"Except that arrow wasn't meant for you."
"I know."
"You ran directly into the arrow's path."
Both their voices began to rise.
"I had to."
"Of course not! You're supposed to avoid arrows, not run towards them."
"Not when the arrow is heading for you!"
The small infirmary fell into a heavy, dense silence, the kind that follows a storm. Both women had anger etched on their faces and no intention of hiding it. But anger never lasted long with them, and it quickly gave way to guilt.
Akaashi sighed, trying to control her temper and return to her usual stoic and calm self. "I was worried about you." She finally said. "Very much."
"I'm sorry, it was careless of me to do that." Bokuto also spoke more calmly this time. "I didn't expect there to be so many enemies."
"The court is full of detractors who want me to abdicate in favor of one of my relatives. It doesn't surprise me they'd attempt something like that."
"Still, it seems low of them to do something like that during the coronation." Bokuto made an involuntary gesture, pouting. "It was supposed to be your day."
Akaashi looked at her with a flash of tenderness that rarely appeared in her icy eyes. She examined her face and the visible parts of her torso, noting the bruises, scars, and wounds scattered across the woman's sturdy body, some old, some recent, all endured with the same dignity and composure of a warrior.
She stopped to look at the wound near her mouth, a superficial but long gash, running from her lower lip to her chin. Akaashi couldn't stop looking at it, and in a moment her hands moved by reflex, bringing her fingers to the mark, the future scar.
"It's nothing." Bokuto downplayed it, gently removing Akaashi's soft hand from her mouth. "Just a few scratches. I'll be fine."
And she smiled. That smile that would make the sun jealous of its brightness.
"You always say you'll be fine." The princess lowered her head, hiding her face under her bangs, her voice carrying a certain reproach. "You get hurt, you recover, and you get hurt again. You're always... always risking your life... for me."
"It's my job." Bokuto said. "I'm your knight. My duty is to protect you."
"Protecting me doesn't mean you're going to be my human shield." And again the decibels rose, the princess's tone shifting to that high and harsh one she used to face her opponents. "You always fight with such disregard for yourself. You take more risks than necessary, you do things without thinking, and you end up more hurt than you should be, just to protect me."
"Your Highness, that is my duty, it's what I must do!"
"You're going to let them keep hurting you for me!?"
"I would die for you!"
"I don't want you to die!"
Akaashi started to cry, and that completely disarmed Bokuto. The blue eyes shining with tears, overflowing until tears streamed down the princess's rosy cheeks.
Bokuto had experienced many different types of wounds and pains throughout her life. Right now her body was covered in bruises and her ribs felt strange if she breathed too fast. None of that compared to the pain of seeing her princess cry.
"Your Highness..."
"Is it that simple for you, isn't it?" Akaashi tried to wipe away her tears with her fists, but the tears kept flowing even though she didn't want them to. "You're going to get yourself killed. You're going to die and leave me alone."
The words got stuck in Akaashi's throat, her breathing becoming irregular as her voice broke.
"I don't want that. I know you must protect me, that as a knight that is your duty and that fighting and defending the kingdom is an honor for you." The princess looked directly into her eyes, her face showing such deep sadness that the pain of seeing her in that state, so vulnerable, was unbearable. "But I don't want you to use yourself as a human shield to protect me. I don't want you to die. I don't want to have to bid you farewell in a coffin because... I don't want you to leave me. I couldn't. I can't imagine a life without you by my side, Koutarou."
Her name in Akaashi's mouth, her princess's, hit her harder than any fist, raw and aggressive, right in the chest, in her heart.
Bokuto had always watched over Akaashi's safety, but also over her happiness. More than mere protection, Bokuto had always been by the princess's side to make sure she was okay. She reminded her to eat and drink when Akaashi got too absorbed in her royal duties, she helped her sneak away to the town to walk together and clear her mind after exhausting meetings, she carried her to bed when she fell asleep reading in the library. Bokuto always tried to take care of Akaashi. And now she had made her cry.
The urge to wrap her in her arms was uncontrollable this time. Bokuto hugged her against her chest, ignoring the discomfort of the bandages or the pain of her wounds. She needed to feel her princess close, hug her, comfort her, make the crying stop and the tears disappear from those beautiful eyes.
"I'm sorry." She whispered, her voice muffled against Akaashi's hair. "I'm so sorry."
It took the princess a few seconds to get over her surprise, but when she did, she didn't hesitate to let herself be enveloped by the warm embrace and wrap both arms around Bokuto.
"Don't leave me alone."
"No, I won't, there's no way I would. I would never leave you alone, Keiji, never."
Akaashi reacted upon hearing her name, pulling back a little without letting go of Bokuto, hugging her by the shoulders. Bokuto, despite being injured, had managed to pull the princess's body and settle her on her lap, and now she looked into her eyes with the devotion of a believer while rubbing her thumb across her cheek, wiping away the tears.
The princess's heart skipped a beat in her chest, and she couldn't stop herself when she leaned closer to Bokuto and kissed her, a soft touch on the wound on her lip.
Bokuto's eyes widened feeling the tender kiss, the softness of the princess's lips, her princess's. Her Keiji.
Reason quickly returned to Akaashi, realizing what they had just done. The princess moved to pull away, her cheeks flushed and heart racing with a mix of euphoria and fear, but Bokuto didn't let her move away. She held her more firmly, her rough and warm hands on the delicate embroidered patterns at the waist of the dress.
Bokuto kissed her back. Slow and soft. She didn't let her pull away.
Akaashi couldn't resist for long and ended up melting in her knight's arms, letting her hold her as if she were the most precious and delicate jewel in the world, all while their lips met for the first time. They fit together perfectly.
The kiss ended with them pressing their foreheads together. Bokuto carefully ran her fingers over the princess's still-damp cheek while her other hand caressed her waist.
"It's pathetic of me. You're the one who's injured, and yet you're the one comforting me. It should be the other way around."
Bokuto shook her head, taking one of Akaashi's hands and bringing it to her lips, planting a soft kiss on her knuckles.
"You've already done enough for me." She said, this time kissing the back of her hand. "Maybe all those fairy tales and legends about princesses' kisses are true. I feel much better now."
Akaashi hid her face in the hollow of Bokuto's neck, trying not to make the enormous blush on her cheeks and ears too obvious.
"What I just said is serious," the princess spoke in a low voice, close enough to Bokuto's ear that only she could hear. "I don't want to lose you. Please don't risk your life as if it had no value, as if you were a disposable artifact"."
"I won't do it." The two-toned haired woman didn't hesitate to say. "I promise you with all my heart."
Bokuto made Akaashi lift her face, forcing her to look her directly in the eyes and holding her chin.
"My princess. My Keiji." Her words were imbued with such pure and deep love. "I will become stronger, more careful and stealthy. No enemy will be able to hurt me again. They won't be able to. I'll do whatever is necessary to ensure that. Just, please, I don't want to be the cause of your sadness again."
Akaashi let out a soft, disbelieving laugh and kissed the palm of Bokuto's hand that was holding her face. "You are the cause of my happiness. I don't want to lose you."
Both melted into a hug charged with love and meaning, their hearts beating in a new synchronicity. The wounds, the tears, and the pain had faded into the background because at that moment, there were only the two of them and that feeling that had been growing between them for years, yearning to come out.
That day, Bokuto discovered something; her life did not belong to the kingdom, nor to the crown, nor to any monarch. Her life was hers alone. And she wanted to spend it with her Keiji.