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Avery had been kind of settled in Derek's place ever since he managed to find out where he lived and make sure he was alive. He really didn't want to be separated from him for long after that. Of course, he didn't live with him, but he spent a lot of time in his small apartment. It wasn't like it really mattered; there was no one waiting for him at home, and his parents didn't really care where he was either, so he preferred the comfort of this cozy place in Derek's presence instead being alone in his own apartment.
Calling it cozy now is almost comical considering the condition it was in when Avery first walked in. Not that anything else was expected, given Derek's state as well. A messy bed, bottles scattered around the floor, dirt and dust everywhere, unwashed dishes left forgotten, and of course, a disgusting smell that made him grimace. It was as if the apartment had been unoccupied for a while, except that it hadn't, but Derek couldn't really do anything about it. The way he found his friend made him...deeply sad. He was in a kind of trance, staring at the monitor, which was plastered with a blue screen. His eyes were droopy and dark, his hair greasy and disheveled, and his clothes smelled of sweat. It was obvious he hadn't been able to take care of himself because of everything that had happened.
So the first thing Avery did was wake him from that strange trance, and Derek's first reaction was to vomit a thick, yellowish liquid onto the floor, which almost made Avery gag at the sight and smell. Putting that aside, Derek was...alive, with a terrible headache in his own words, but alive nonetheless. He seemed very happy that Avery had found him. In that first encounter, Avery helped him lie down on the bed and slowly began cleaning his apartment for him. Derek insisted it wasn't necessary, but for Avery it was the least he could do for him. Once everything was cleaner and smelled fresher, Avery also helped him bathe. Derek's body was obviously going to be sore after sitting up and not being able to sleep for who knows how long, so Avery helped him sit in the tub and wash his hair. Derek took care of the soaping, of course. After that, he looked like new; it was clear he really needed it.
Avery decided to stay with him that night. They ordered dinner for delivery since Derek really wasn't in any condition to go out. He seemed to be trying to eat calmly, but it was clear he hadn't had a proper meal in a long time, considering his source of food lately had simply been...drinks.
A curious first encounter, yeah, going to the house of someone you met in Minecraft to snap them out of a cosmic trance and help them even take a bath, only to then stay with them all night. You could say Avery didn't have the best survival instincts, but at the same time, he had no reason to distrust Derek. Besides, the fact that he could finally see him, hear him, made him incredibly happy. Because that night he also got to know him better. Derek already knew basically everything about Avery, but Avery knew absolutely nothing about Derek, so finally being able to learn more about him also put him at peace in a way. Because one of his first thoughts upon meeting D3rlord3 was curiosity, wanting to know who he was, what he did, what he liked, and the answers were now here.
The only question that remains unanswered for both of them is how Derek is even still alive, but honestly? Neither of them wants to think about it too much.
So basically, ever since that time, Avery is always around Derek and his apartment. Derek has offered to go to Avery's apartment many times, of course, but Avery doesn't feel that his house is as welcoming as this one. At the same time, he knows that Derek isn't that interested in the location; the main interest is being able to be with Avery and that's what really matters to him.
Speaking of him, Avery can see Derek washing dishes in the kitchen out of the corner of his eye. Feeling a bit bored, he decides to approach him, resting his chin on Derek's shoulder. Derek is taller than him, but the height of his shoulder is just right for Avery to comfortably rest his head there. His hands move tentatively until they settle on Derek's waist. Derek leans against him slightly, making Avery's head spin a little.
Man. What are they supposed to be?
That's a question that's been on Avery's mind for a while.
He knows that friends can be affectionate with each other without any romantic connotation, but...sometimes between him and Derek it really feel like there's something, I mean, just look at them now. And maybe, just maybe, Avery loves him more than a in friend way...fork found in the kitchen yeah. But he doesn't really know whether to tell him or not; he doesn't know if it's too obvious and Derek has already noticed but is trying to act like nothing's wrong, because when you think about it, why would someone like Derek be with someone like Avery? Derek is intelligent, attractive, and strangely good with people, even though he seems more the antisocial type who doesn't attract many persons. Avery, on the other hand, isn't the smartest or most useful person in the world. Is he pretty? At least he likes to think so, but people never seem to want to be around him, even though he tries hard to be nice. He has some friends he's made recently, mostly through his skateboarding classes, but they're not exactly close. So the idea of Derek being interested in him is simply...almost unattainable for him. He knows Derek is comfortable around him—that's why he lets him get so close and be so touchy—but he doesn't know if it would ever lead to romantic attraction for his part.
"Avery"
"Uh- Yes?"
"I'm done here"
And it was true, the dishes were already washed and Avery hadn't even noticed, quickly removing his hands from Derek's waist and putting them in his pants pockets pretending that he didn't leave them on him more than he should.
"Oops! S-Sorry man I didn't notice"
"It's okay, it doesn't bother me"
He smiles, and Avery swears he could just melt right there at that sight.
"Right-"
"I was thinking of taking a bath, do you want come with me?"
"Sure man"
That was something else entirely: bathing together. They didn't do it all the time, o, but there were times when they would simply sit at opposite ends of the tub and relax for a while, usually after somewhat stressful days. Avery knew very well that this wasn't something friends typically did, at least not commonly, but when he thought about it, it wasn't so strange considering their situation. Even the first time they met, Avery had to see Derek naked, only that time it was necessary so he could help him with the bath and keep him from moving his body too much. After that, the excuses stopped; they simply did it because they wanted to, because they could, because it was a comfortable moment. Even if Avery sometimes still felt strangely shy about seeing Derek's body, that feeling quickly faded with the comfort and calm he found immersed in the bubbles.
It doesn't have to be romantic if they don't make it romantic, right? Derek never seems too flustered or shy; well, his gaze sometimes wanders away looking at the wall or ceiling, but he can look at Avery longer than Avery can look at him.
As was their routine, while Derek filled the bathtub and heated the water, Avery looked for their clothes. It wasn't very late yet, but he assumed they wouldn't be going out that night, so he went straight to get some comfortable pajamas and then their towels (Yes, seeing how much time he spends here, Derek had already gotten him a towel and he left some of his clothes here). When he stepped into the bathroom, he noticed Derek was already undressing. His eyes flickered for a moment before refocusing on what he was doing. He turned around to start undressing too and heard the sound of water moving, indicating that Derek had already entered. He confirmed this when he heard a soft sigh. Not wanting to linger, he left his used clothes in the hamper for them and also got into the bathtub, sitting down in front of Derek who was waiting for him with a small smile
"Is the temperature okay?"
"Yeah, just the way I like it. Pretending you don't know the answer, huh?"
Derek knows everything about Avery. Even though that damn infinite knowledge thankfully faded away little by little, traces of it remain in Derek's mind. Some things were forgotten as if they were a dream, but were quickly recalled by him after spending so much time with Avery—a kind of déjà vu, in Derek's own words. Avery finds it endearing, the way Derek constantly sought to learn about him in order to refresh his forgotten knowledge, and from that, Avery could learn entirely new things about Derek as well. A type of exchange.
"Do you want me to wash your hair, Avery?"
"You already know the answer to that too"
He wasn't going to deny it; he liked it when that happened. Derek was always very careful with him, and that included his hair. Of course, for this, they had to sit closer together, their knees touching, as Derek put the shampoo in his hand and Avery lowered his head slightly to give him better access. It didn't take long for him to feel his friend's fingers running through his hair, gently gliding the shampoo over his scalp as he worked on it. Avery relaxed at the touch, simply thinking how nice it felt when this happened. Derek liked taking care of him; it was something he quickly realized. Whether it was small details or bigger things, Derek was always there to lend a hand. Just as Avery likes taking care of him, well, at first he did it mostly out of a self-imposed obligation. He felt it was something he had to do, he had to care for and try to protect the person to whom he basically owed his life, eternally indebted to him. As time passed, the obligation transformed into affection, a more genuine concern for Derek and a desire to care for him out of a completely sincere feeling, beyond an obligation that wasn't even real in the first place. So it's basically a win-win. Derek takes care of Avery and Avery takes care of Derek, though the boy doesn't know if it's his own imagination or what, but he gets the feeling that Derek is...strangely overprotective with him.
And if that's really the case and he's not imagining it, he can't blame him.
It's no secret that Avery is very important to Derek; he's even told him so himself a few times. He knows Derek went through hell with the king, and Avery almost experienced it firsthand. His knight must be terrified at the thought of something like that happening again and truly hurting Avery.
It's a guilty and embarrassing feeling, but Avery likes the idea of Derek being more protective of him; it makes him feel important and loved, because no one gave him the attention and warmth that Derek gives him, not even his parents or supposed past friends, that's why the fleeting thought that sometimes crosses his mind about Derek one day getting bored of him...terrifies him, deeply.
"Avery?"
"Mm?"
"Are you okay?"
"Yes?"
"You're zoning out today"
"Really?? Sorry, I'm feeling a bit...thoughtful"
"About what?"
"Nothing in particular. Now come here! It's my turn to wash your hair"
Derek noticed Avery's pathetic attempt to change the subject, of course he did. Even so, if Avery didn't seem to want to talk about it, then he wasn't going to force him neither. Instead, he did what he'd done before and lowered his head until he felt Avery's hands tangling in his hair, knowing full well they'd be at it for a long time considering how much Avery loved to make foam and spend time giving Derek ridiculous and silly hairstyles, something that clearly didn't bother him at all. He liked seeing Avery happy, even over small things like this.
"Your hair is pretty"
"Do you think so?"
"Of course! I think it made me appreciate the color red a little more; well, in general I like that color more because of you"
"That's cute"
"I- told you to stop saying those things out of nowhere"
"Why? What's wrong with it? It's a sweet comment, and I started liking the green more because of you"
"Oh really?"
"Yeah"
"So it's a mutual thing"
Derek hummed in agreement as Avery finished rinsing away all the remaining foam.
They had two bars of soap for their bodies, just to save time. They wouldn't minded sharing one, but this way was fine too. And as usual, once they were clean, they simply sat in the water, probably until it cooled down or until they got bored of sitting there.
Amid the silence, with the only sounds of outside and the water lapping at their slightest movements, Avery's mind wandered back to this situation, to his situation with Derek, everything, everything that had gone through his head before regarding this moment.
"...Derek?"
"Yes?"
"I never asked you, but what do you think of this?"
"Of what?"
"Shower together" Derek just raised an eyebrow at the question, and Avery began to elaborate. "Well, I suppose you know that's not a very common thing between friends"
"According to who?"
"I don't know, man, society? It's one of those unspoken, established rules. Anyone would assume that bathing together is more of a...couple thing or something." Avery scratches the back of his neck at his own comment, knowing there must be a slight blush on his cheeks now. "I guess it's mostly from having to be naked and all that"
"Nudity is something natural"
"Well yes, I know, but there are many people who don't think that"
"And do you really care what others think, or do you simply feel you have to believe it too?"
"I don't care! It's obvious that a body is just that, a body, but it's also hard to convince yourself of that when most people think otherwise"
"I understand. So basically you want my opinion on this?"
"That is"
"Personally, I enjoy it; I think it relaxes me more than bathing alone"
"Why?"
"Because you're here, obviously"
"Uh. I relax you?"
"At a certain point, I think it simply calms me down to know that you're here and that you're comfortable with me to this extent. As you said before, most friends wouldn't do this, But you're not just a friend, you know? You're my best friend, my best companion, so I like sharing these moments with you'
Best friend. It's kind of weird to be called that, even by Derek himself, because Avery never really had a best friend, never had anyone close to him, and he probably never will again, in the sense that he'll probably never again feel the kind of connection he feels with Derek with someone else. Is it the same for Derek? Avery would never shower with a friend who wasn't him, but is it the same for him, or would he do it with someone else who's also close to him? Well, he knows Derek doesn't have many close friends or acquaintances either, but—Ah. He's overthinking it again, isn't he?
"I'm glad we're on the same page then, uhm, does that mean you'd also bathe with other friends or...?"
"No"
"Uh? But you said nudity is something natural"
"I did, but that doesn't mean I'd let just anyone see me naked. Avery"
"So I have the privilege?"
"Privilege?"
Derek said in a mocking tone, a smirk appearing on his face as Avery realized what he'd said, clearing hks throat dramatically while the other simply laughed.
"You know what I mean!"
"I do. I'm just kidding"
"Whatever....I'm-...I'm glad you feel so comfortable with me, no one has ever trusted me so much like you I think"
Derek's smile softened into a more genuine one, his eyes a look Avery could only describe as appreciative, affectional even.
"I'm glad you feel that way about me too"
There's a strange tension in the air, Avery can feel it. Things are rising in his throat, wanting to come out, but he doesn't know if it's the right time—maybe not, maybe yes, he just doesn't know. It's as if everything Derek says makes him think he likes him too, but at the same time, it could simply be a deep appreciation with nothing romantic involved. It confuses him, a lot, more than it should.
The conversation slowly faded after that, so they just sat there in silence, staring at each other. Avery's chin rested on his knees as he watched Derek, not very subtly, but at this point he probably didn't care too much if Derek noticed his obvious observations, and he doubted it bothered him in any way. In fact, every now and then, when their eyes met, a small smile would appear on the other's lips, so he was almost certain that Derek seemed to enjoy his attention.
As planned, they stayed there until the water felt too cold for them. The drying and changing process was almost always quite quick for both of them. Once in the room, Avery took the hairdryer to dry Derek's hair first. That was part of the domestic routine too; they didn't even have to ask anymore, it was just normal. Once his hair was dry, Avery combed it as well, brushing gently to avoid unnecessary pulling. When that was done, it was his turn, so he switched positions with Derek to sit in front of him on the bed. Derek, as always, touched and handled him as if he were some fragile object of utmost importance, Avery liked it; it certainly relaxed him when Derek touched his hair or played with it in general. So, once his hair was dry and styled, he gently let himself fall further back, resting his back against Derek's chest, leaning back a little more. Derek put the hairdryer on the nightstand so he could get comfortable too and let Avery rest better. His chin rested on his head, and his arms wrapped around him, his hands resting together on his abdomen, holding him close. Avery could only sigh contentedly; this was comfortable, very comfortable indeed. If he stayed like this any longer, he would surely fall asleep.
Instead, he guided his hands to Derek's, simply resting them on his for a few moments before carefully interlacing their fingers together, leaving them like that. Behind him, he could feel Derek slightly trying to snuggle closer to him. Yeah, this is one of those other things that makes Avery rethink what are they supposed to be, okay yeah friends are affectionate with each other that's obvious, but... there's something. In their own words, they're best friends, but is that term really right for them? Even if Avery is aware of his feelings, and even though Derek might not feel the same way, he senses there's another term for them, something that doesn't quite fit within the group of friends but also not quite lovers. Soulmates? How cheesy, Avery. But really, how do you define them? Well, he doesn't know why he's overthinking this so much. Derek called him his best friend before and has described him that way several times, so yeah, best friends after all. Jeez. Why does Avery think about this so much?
I mean, he could always ask for a deeper answer and...
You know what. Fuck it.
"Hey Derek?"
"Mm?"
"How would you describe us? You know, besides being best friends"
"Why the question?"
"I'm just curious"
"I don't think there's a right answer to that"
"What do you mean?"
"Even I can't be sure what label to put on us"
"If even you can't do that, then we're screwed, aren't we?"
"Not at all. Although maybe "best friends" doesn't quite convince me"
"No?"
"But I know very well that there is a term that I would like to use"
"Wich one?"
Avery could feel Derek shift his head to rest it on his shoulder instead, his voice coming out softer than usual.
"Does "partner" sound good to you?"
"...what...?". Avery feels like he can't even process what he just said, turning perhaps a little abruptly to face him, now sitting across from him while his eyes are still wide open, his mouth opening and closing a few times as he can't find the right words, he feels like his mind is running a marathon right now without being able to stop. "W-What do you mean?"
"Isn't it obvious?"
"I was seriously asking, Derek"
"And I'm answering seriously too"
"I- You- What? Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why would you even like that?"
"Because I like you, and you like me too, so what's the problem?"
"Did you know that?!"
"For a while, yeah. I noticed"
"And you never told me anything?!"
"Because I knew you'd get nervous, like you are now"
"I...I'm sorry"
"Why are you apologizing?"
"I don't even know, for feeling this way? I guess?"
"What's wrong with it?"
"Nothing really, it's just... I didn't think you felt that way too"
"I thought I was being obvious enough"
"Well I thought you were just being nice! You know, more than nice. No, it's not really for that reason, I just didn't think someone like you would be interested in someone like me"
"Someone like me?"
"You're basically almost perfect. You have some flaws like any human being, of course, but compared to me..."
"Avery" His arms wrapped around him, one hand tangling in his hair as he gently stroked it. "Don't you remember? You're special. You're everything. Everything to me"
"...seriously?"
"Always. So please, believe me when I say I like you"
"Since when?"
"A long time"
"How much?"
"Since I met you, basically"
"What- You mean the very first time whe met in minecraft or the time we met there??"
"As embarrassing as it may be, and even changing the phrase a little, I think I liked you even before I could meet you properly"
"What?!"
"Yeah, as crazy as it makes me look. I just couldn't help it"
"Wow...so you fell for first, huh? I never, never, would have expected that"
"What can I say? I'm full of surprises"
"I noticed...you really think I'm special? I know it was one of the first things you said to me indirectly, but well, you know, it was to snap me out of it, I didn't think..."
"You didn't believe I really said it?" Avery shrugged, not wanting to answer. Now he felt a bit mean and bad for not believing him; it was almost as if he was somehow belittling Derek's feelings and thoughts. "I believed it, Avery. I believed it then and I still believe it now. You're special, you have no idea how much"
And Avery feels like he might cry now; it's like a bucket of cold water thrown directly at him. But it's not a bucket, it's a warm caress that washes over him, and he doesn't know how to react to it. He was so focused on his own feelings that maybe he didn't pay as much attention to Derek's as he should have. Alas, he knows it's something he shouldn't feel guilty about, not at all; Derek wouldn't like that. Derek... he thinks of Avery in a way that makes him feel like he's on cloud nine, basically. He always considered himself a loving person to everyone, maybe too friendly at times, trying to get them to like him too, to see him too. And out of nowhere, this amazing man appeared in his life to appreciate and love him without Avery having to do anything to earn it, which sounds almost ridiculous now. Of course, no one should force themselves to be loved by others, but Avery was so focused on finding friends and attention that he forgot about that. He doesn't need it anymore, because what Derek feels is genuine, true. The way Derek spoke to him and touched him so sweetly confirms it now and always will. It's a situation that feels almost absurdly comedic in some ways; Avery refused to be loved for think he didn't deserve it that now all the past affective actions are coming crashing down on him one after another. If he thinks about it carefully and recaps all the memories, it makes sense to think that Derek liked him too.
"Sorry"
"Why are you apologizing now?"
"Because I didn't notice how you felt, you must feel bad about that"
"It's okay Aves, really"
"But I don't understand, if you always knew I liked you, why didn't you tell me before?"
"I was waiting to see if you would do it first; perhaps you would feel more comfortable that way, being ready to talk. I didn't want to rush things or unintentionally make you uncomfortable"
"I see...damn Derek, you waited so long, I was going crazy here"
"Pff. Sorry, I can imagine"
"So...what now?"
"I don't know, you tell me, partner"
"You're already calling me partner and asking me to choose, huh? You're impossible, Derek"
"And you love me that way"
"I do. I really do"
Avery giggles as Derek pulls him closer and places a soft kiss on the crown of his head, then on his forehead, trailing down his face until it ends in a sweet little peck on his lips. All the doubts and fears that once plagued him seem to have magically vanished from his mind. He knows that those insecurities will surely return at some point, because they always do, whether to a greater or lesser degree, always leaving a stain that can't be erased. But right now, his mind can't think of anything but happiness. He's here, in Derek's arms, now officially confirmed as his partner. He can't ask for anything more than this.
So in this state of warmth, he simply melts against him, letting his mind rest from any thoughts other than the feeling on hus heart at this moment. He's so, so lucky. Perhaps Avery isn't even aware of how fast Derek's heart is beating now; even if he can hear it, his mind doesn't register it. He only registers the touch, the tenderness, things he's searched for so long, and that finally, they are here.