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"Hank, can you add blue food coloring to this?" Connor said, handing over the glass of water Hank offered him after their long day at the DPD.
"Yeah, sure kid," Hank went to the kitchen cabinets where he stored all of Connor's (and the others) food colours. "Someone 'round?"
Connor frowned, looking down at his hands. "I don't know," He blinked a few times, "But someone's here"
The variants always confused Connor when they were in the front seat with him. They called him 51. When they were here, Connor always felt his sense of his identity slipping from him, like a mix of singularities.
52, 53, and 54 were androids in the inner world. They all were, except Connor. And they had an aversion towards food, and drinks that weren't blue. Nines was the only one who sustained the body when Connor was in the back seat. That was his role after-all. He was their protector.
Taking back the glass of water, now blue, Connor pressed his fingers against his temples, expressing the way his head hurt. "The variants are all here at once, I think"
"I'll get you an aspirin, son," Hank said, casually walking towards the medicine cabinet in their living room. Connor seemed more rigid now, sitting straight with his shoulders in a tight line. It wasn't like him. "You stressed or something? they're not usually around with you anymore"
"It's been a long day, lieutenant," Connor, or well, one of the variants said. It was the ‘lieutenant’ that throws Hank off.
"Take this," Hank handed them the pill, "Try to sleep it off, we can be late to work tomorrow." He paused, "If Nines lets us. Kid's got a stick up his ass"
Connor just nodded, taking the aspirin before following Hank and going into his room, muttering a 'good night'
In the darkness of his room, Amanda was standing infront of Connor's bed as he lay in it. She didn't interact with the outer world ever since Sixty appeared, but Connor always saw her around after a long, tiring, day.
"Failing a mission again, Connor?" She said, her voice echoed in Connor's head.
No, Connor was not failing. He just needed more evidence to solve the mystery of his current case. He felt that thought pass in his head strongly. It must be Nines murmuring in the back of Connor's mind.
Amanda was one of the oldest to be present with Connor. Connor did not even know that she was not a person from the outer-world up until he was 20, when he met Hank who took him to a psychiatrist and a clinical psychologist. It was a revelation, and it was hard to accept. But there was relief in knowing that Connor had some say in controlling his front.
Connor closed his eyes and tried to ignore what Amanda, ever calm and collected, was spewing at him.
Connor could feel Nines' presence as soon as he opened his eyes. Nines did, in fact, wake him up early. It had been a few long days, Nines had been around more.
He walked into the kitchen and started to prepare himself omelettes ambidextrously. Connor wasn't ambidextrous, and usually he didn't eat breakfast, opting to drink coffee instead. But Nines' always made them eat. He was a good cook too, unlike all the others.
"Thank fuck for Nines," Hank said as he bit into his freshly made Omelette.
Nines had now become a constant with Connor at the DPD. He was usually co-conscious, especially when Connor was working a hard case. He was a bit more detail-oriented than Connor, despite being the youngest.
There used to be a time where Nines would only front when he was desperately needed. He came somewhere around when Connor had started academy. He helped Connor deal with the stress and the rough edges.
Now, however, Nines had taken a liking to their work. He was less afraid of interacting with the outer-world, but he masked himself nevertheless. Always afraid of comprising the system.
Then there was also Gavin Reed.
Gavin Reed, the most hated detective at the DPD, known for his temper and his inability to work with a partner, was a reason for Nines to always come out.
When Connor was partnered up with Gavin, he did not think he would be able to maintain this partnership for more than a week, looking at the way Gavin was going. Everything annoyed Gavin, he would spew out bullshit at whoever got in his way.
But Nines, ever the bodyguard, would come to the front and spit right back in Gavin's face. And suddenly, Connor and Gavin had been partners for three months. Longer than any partner Gavin had ever had.
It started with Nines just taking the driver's wheel whenever Gavin was being a bitch, and over the course of a few weeks, Nines suddenly started to always be around when Gavin came in sight.
Connor let him. He wasn't afraid anymore to give up control, especially to Nines. Plus, it was good for Nines to interact with the outside, and Connor could feel Nines, for the first time since his formation, taking a liking to something that wasn't about Connor.
Taking a liking to someone.
Sixty, of course, hated all of this. Connor could faintly feel him lurking at the moment. Sixty had one mission: Revenge, in all scenarios. He wasn't deviant in the inner-world, unlike all the others, so he was primarily taken care of by Amanda.
"The fuck's up with you, dipshit?" Gavin slapped Connor's table a few times. Connor had been staring uselessly at his report for approximately ten minutes.
He looked up at Gavin, unsure, eyes fluttering without him meaning to, trying to gain more control over his conscious so he could speak. Nines was very close already. Connor could see him in his peripheral, his arms folded as he stared at Gavin. His face mix of distaste and...
Affection?
"I'm fine, Gavin," Connor said, "We have reports to finish."
"Yeah, like you'll be able to finish shit right now," Gavin scoffed, then lowered his voice, "You dissociating or something?"
A frustrated Hank had told Gavin about Connor and his system when Gavin, a detective through and through, figured out that Connor was not Connor sometimes. And then he had questions. He wanted to know who the other Connor was. Why? Connor chalked it up to curiosity.
He didn't have an issue with people knowing about his condition, he had put that behind him through therapy. Though, the others were not on the same page. So Connor kept it to himself at the DPD, albeit Hank, Fowler, and now Gavin
"What's it to you, Detective?" Connor (Connor?) shot back, chin now elevated as if challenging Gavin.
"Hey, Asshole," Gavin grinned at him, instantly knowing, a glint in his pupils. "Admit it, you just can't stay away from me"
Nines rolled his eyes, "Don't flatter yourself. I protect Connor from infuriating people, like you."
When Gavin cocked his head and just grinned wider, mischief on his face, Nines stared at him and said, "I hate you."
"You love me," Gavin simply stated.
It was weird how comfortable Nines had gotten with Gavin, how he didn't feel the need to mask around him anymore. He used to. He had always pretended to be Connor outside of their own home, but he didn't know when he let his demeanour slip away so easily with this absolutely frustrating man.
"You wish, Reed." Nines got up from his chair, mechanically walked towards the break room. Gavin saw him grabbing Gavin's shark mug.
"No sugar, Prick!" Gavin called from his desk.
"I'll put four cubes in." Nines replied, fixing Gavin a dark coffee with no sugar.
Sixty titled his head as he looked at Nines, a similar trait all of them shared with Connor. "Why do you act like his pet?"
"Behave, Sixty," Connor's voice came through, "We talked about not interrupting anyone's routine."
"If it goes against my assignment, expect no 'good behaviour' from my side," Sixty stated.
"And what is your current assignment, Sixty?" Nines asked sarcastically, humouring Sixty, while making sure he wasn't making any expressions on the body's face to sell him out.
"Punch Detective Gavin Reed."
"Well, you are not going to accomplish that mission," Nines' voice was stern.
"I always accomplish my mission." Sixty said, standing straight.
That was enough for Connor to appear beside Sixty, "Can you stop? You are not supposed to be here right now."
"I'll be here whenever my mission requi-"
"My head aches," Nines interrupted, voice raised. "Connor, if you want to take control, be my guest. But I request you to kindly kick Sixty out."
"You can stay, Nines," Connor replied with a smile on his face, "Make Gavin his coffee. He gets crankier than Hank otherwise."
"You are hindering my assignment, Connor"
"Sixty," Connor said, looking like he was a second away from sparring Sixty, "You are not needed right now."
Sixty let out an angry sigh, composing himself, "I'll see you at the tower, Connor."
Nines could feel his head getting lighter as Sixty retrieved from the front. He turned to Connor, coffee in his hand, "I'll take care of today."
Connor tilted his head, a small concealed smile on his face. Relief. "Okay, Nines."
Nines walked towards Gavin's desk with his coffee mug and put in down on the table, where Gavin's legs rested as he leaned back against his chair.
"Thank god," Gavin said sarcastically, looking up at Nines.
He looked just like Connor. He shared traits with Connor, but Nines was still so unlike him. With his chin held up high and his collars hiding his neck. The way he carried himself, it was all so different than Connor. Gavin could almost see what Nines must look like in reality.
Nines slapped Gavin's legs off the desk. "Made no progress without me, I assume?"
Gavin rolled his eyes. "Yeah shut up, smartass," he flipped some papers on the table, "Review these files, will you?"
Nines collected the files in his hands, "Whatever will you do without me?"
"Talk to my ass!"
The others forced Sixty to go to their doctor today. Sixty, of course, was reluctant, but then again, he had to make 'peace' with the system. Even if it didn't matter to his objectives.
"Hi," The doctor, Yani, said with a small smile. Her IPad with its notes open and a stylus in her hands, "How have you been?"
Sixty held his posture sitting on her couch, his face was stoic. He paused, taking a minute to answer the question. He didn't bother with starting with small-talk. "Connor's stress levels have been high for the past few days. One of the reasons being that the variants have been in the front-space alot." He said as a matter-of-fact. "RK900 has been... interrupting my assignments"
"Oh?" Yani nodded, taking an interest in what Sixty had to say, "And why do you think that is?"
"I believe, the deviancy virus makes androids irrational. He has been fleeing his role. He has taken a liking... to Detective Gavin Reed. It hinders Connor's activities. And it hinders my protocol"
Nines, standing behind Yani scoffed, "I uphold my role. I have not taken a liking to him, Sixty. I am present so he does not create an issue for Connor."
Sixty did not even bother to shoot him a look. Yani spoke up, "And I believe I am talking to Sixty right now?"
"RK800, 313 248 317 - 60"
"Sixty," Yani smiled again, "Is anyone else present here with you?"
"Connor is supervising me, and RK900 is present for some reason I do not understand."
"Okay, hello to Connor and Nines too," Yani said with a little wave, "You usually don’t like being here, I believe this is only the third time we are having a conversation directly."
Sixty had come after the Variants and Amanda, he split when Connor was 15, and held most of Connor's memories related to violence and aggression. Amanda used to give him orders, missions that he had to follow. And Sixty always did.
Sixty had heard Yani telling Connor that Sixty might have formed because of Connor's belief of being evil and a desperate need of apathy, feeling as if his hyper-empathy took alot away from him. His reluctance to show violence even when if it was brewing in him with anguish was also a reason. She called Sixty the persecutor, a termed she used to refer to Amanda, before Amanda changed her role and passed it down to Sixty, becoming his handler.
Amanda had never interacted with Yani, or even Hank for that matter. She only interacted with Connor, if not Sixty, and Connor didn't seem to enjoy her presence.
"Connor has forced me to the front. I do not have a choice. My handler has given me an objective to wait until 45 minutes are over."
"Well, a session lasts for 50 minutes, so I think you can stay for 5 minutes longer, if you want." Yani said, and Sixty paused again, now finally looking up at where Nines was standing.
"I believe so," Sixty said.
"So, Sixty, how have you been?" Yani asked.
"I already told you. The system has been clashing, but for the most part, Connor has been gaining more control over his emotions."
"I'm glad to hear that," Yani said, "But, how have you been, Sixty?"
She used that name alot. It felt unfamiliar to Sixty, but somehow, it was also growing on him. "I have answered that question."
"Well, I believe you have been commenting on the system, not yourself," Yani probed.
"I do not," Sixty blinked a few times, "Have an opinion. I don't feel, Dr. Sahey."
Yani kept smiling at him, unbothered by what he said. "Then tell me, how do you feel about being here, right now?"
Sixty blinked again. Why was she asking him that? Clearly he had no opinions. But at the same time,
"I do not wish to be here. This conversation is unnecessary. I want to leave. And Nines standing here makes me..."
"Frustrated?" Yani finished his sentence, waiting for him to answer.
"I believe that would be the human word for it, if you want to explain it to yourself. However, I only state facts. I do not feel." Sixty repeated.
"Hmm," Yani jotted something down on her IPad, "Heres a fact that you're missing, Sixty,"
Sixty could not decipher what she was about to say.
"Frustration is a feeling," She said, and Sixty suddenly saw Software Instability^ at the corner of his eye. "Can you deny that?"
Sixty did not say anything, so Yani proceeded to turn the conversation towards why Connor's stress levels have been high, why he and Sixty were sparring more. They talked about Nines' affections towards Gavin Reed, much to Nines' dismay. The conversation flowed along the DPD, and making peace with the system again. And here and there, she would ask Sixty about himself, she would ask about Amanda and how he felt about the situations, and his missions that made him feel like a failure.
Sixty stayed for the extra 5 minutes.
"How was the shrink?" Hank asked as he drove them back home.
"Fine," Sixty replied, looking ahead at the road.
"What d'ya talk about?"
"Nothing of importance."
Hank did not seem to like that answer, but he didn't push, swerving his car to the left. That wasn't the way home. "We're gonna make a stop to eat."
"I don't need to eat, lieutenant Anderson."
"Connor does. You gotta keep him alive, kid."
And all it took was a steak for Connor to push Sixty back and devour it. Sixty didn't eat the whole day, he didn't have the need too. So Connor was starving.
"Don't start licking the plate in public, Connor," Hank laughed.
Connor, Nines, and Gavin were still working on their case until the DPD emptied out. Gavin was stifling yawns, he was cranky and was going on a smoke break every 20 minutes.
Gavin was flipping his pen around his fingers, he looked at Connor curiously, "Where's the prick been?"
Connor sighed, Nines was very close to front the whole day, though not taking the wheel and letting Connor handle the day. But Connor could feel his stuffy head and Nines spilling through himself as he worked ambidextrously. "He's been here the whole day."
"Hello to you, plastic."
Nines had declared himself the 'most advanced android ever made' in front of Gavin once. Ever since then, after pestering them about what Androids were, Gavin had begun to call Nines names like 'Plastic prick" or "Tin-can." Nines didn't like it at first, but it had quickly became just a thing that they did.
Connor rolled his eyes- Which was Nines. He was definitely coming closer to the driver's seat, and honestly? Connor felt so tired he was shifting to the passenger's seat too.
"Nines believes it is best if we retire for the night. Verbatim, 'You need to sleep and ingest something other than caffeine and nicotine if you want to be an efficient partner tomorrow'"
Gavin laughed, "Tell him to shut up, I'm a big boy."
"I don't need to tell him, he can hear you."
Gavin rolled his shoulders and stood up, walking towards Connor, "Well then, tin-can," he pressed two fingers against Connor's temple, "Shut up."
That was it, Connor stared blankly at the files on his table until his eyes gained some emotion again, and his slouched posture straightened up.
Nines looked up at Gavin and grabbed his wrist, grip tightening, holding it in place. "You love playing with fire, Detective."
Gavin grinned the same grin he always did when he saw Nines. "You like it, Niner"
There was moment where they just stared at eachother, Gavin's hand still in Nines' grip. A few moments passed before Gavin snatched his hand back and cleared his throat, shuffling weirdly at his feet.
"Your bike's under maintenance," Nines said, "I'll drive you home so you can sleep and not waste our time tomorrow on making coffee every 5 minutes."
Gavin pressed a palm to his chest, mockingly acting surprised, "My knight in a fuckass turtleneck."
"Don't make me regret my decision," Nines just got up from his desk and started walking towards the exit.
"'Won't stop till you do."
Nines stepped on the breaks in front of Gavin's apartment building, waiting for Gavin to finish shuffling with his seat belt. "I believe this is your stop. Please get out so I can go home."
Gavin hummed, pausing for a bit as he opened his door. Then, as if gaining courage, he said, "Dipping out on me so fast?"
Nines pursed his lips. Gavin Reed and his words were a constant mystery he wished to resolve. "Hank must be waiting for me."
Gavin sighed, "Yeah, whatever, old man needs to be tucked in his bed anyway. Age is catching upto him."
"He's not that old, Gavin." That was a new one, Nines never referred to Gavin by his first name, always opting for detective or Reed instead. He paused to consider something, "But I believe, he wouldn't mind if I am a little late."
Gavin's face lit up. "Cool. Then park your car and we can go up. Asshat must be losing her shit waiting for us."
Us. He had met Gavin's cat a few times, she took a liking to Nines specifically. And it irritated Gavin how Nines took all of Asshat's attention. Yet, Gavin called them an Us, as if Asshat was waiting on Nines to come home with Gavin. Which... could mean nothing.
"I do miss Hattie."
"Don't try to act like she's cute. Her name is literally her. Fucking Asshat." Gavin laughed walking out of the car, Nines followed him. Right at that moment, he felt Connor leaving him to his own advancements
Like Sumo, it was as if Asshat could immediately tell who was fronting even though they all appeared as Connor did. Connor had been here before, once or twice when a case demanded an all-nighter, and Asshat always made Connor run around trying to pet her. But with Nines, she would come up tip-tapping her paws and instantly purring and rubbing against his legs.
"No 'Hi' for me? Did you forget who feeds you everyday?" Gavin pointed and accused Asshat as she climbed up in Nines' arms.
Nines smiled, snuggling his nose into her head. He was more relaxed with her in his arms. It suited him, thought Gavin. The uptight prick was rarely ever relaxed.
Gavin huffed and walked into his kitchen, grabbing a Redbull from his fridge and then turning towards Nines, "You ate something? I only got, ugh, blueberry yogurt if you want blue food stuff"
Nines was surprised at how Gavin remembered their thing with blue food and drinks. He smiled some more, tilting his head, "I would like that. Though, I'm afraid Connor might come around again because he loves the taste of blueberry yogurt."
Gavin laughed, walking towards the couch and setting down the yogurt on the table in front of where Nines sat, "That guy's always hungry"
"Well, no one eats but him and I, until forced, so it is only natural for him to feel hungry," Nines said, slowly picking up his spoon and scooping up a little bit of yogurt, feeling around his headspace to see if Connor was lurking.
He wasn't, though. Nobody one was. It had been a while since Nines was alone in his consciousness. He didn't know how peaceful a quiet headspace felt like. He did wonder why no one was here.
"I'd ask to give me a warning if he comes, but Asshat would probably run away the moment you feel a hint of him."
"She's a very smart child, " Nines petted Asshat who was now lying in his lap.
Gavin yawned again, muttering something like 'She's stupid' while chugging his Red-bull.
"You should go to bed, Gavin. Consuming caffeine and sugar at this hour is not a wise decision"
"I think I told you zip it," Gavin said, sitting beside Nines and picking up his TV remote. "We're watching I, Robot"
It had become frequent for Nines to stay over for a few hours and watch a movie or two with Gavin, but usually while they were working a case or making reports. It was new for them to just, do it without a reason.
"I believe I do not get a say in this," Nines said
"You don't," Gavin put on the movie, slowly relaxing into his couch. His couch was huge, but he was still sitting right beside Nines, so close that their thighs touched as Gavin man-spread.
As Nines finished his yogurt, Gavin's head was already lolling, dozing off. Nines stared at him, then decided to guide Gavin's head on his shoulder with his hand. More comfortable this way, he told himself. Atleast he won't have to hear about Gavin whining about neck pain the next day.
Connor rolled Sixty over and Sixty tumbled before getting right back up and charging towards Connor.
"You have to stop enabling RK900," Sixty growled as he tackled Connor to the ground
Connor struggled out of his grip and blocked his attacks. "He is capable of making his own decisions, Sixty. You can't control all of us."
The Cyberlife tower was usually where Connor and Sixty sparred over the smallest of conflicts. It had been this way since Sixty had split. They never got anywhere, they were both equally trained and had equal strengths. It always ended up with Nines breaking them up or grabbing them from the back of their collars to keep them away. At this point, they just sparred for the love of the game.
"You can't be the one to talk," Sixty said as he tried to kick Connor's legs from under him, "You control us."
Connor, once again, blocked his move. "I don't control anyone. I just gatekeep the front, like I always have"
Sixty scoffed, swinging right at Connor face as Connor said, staggering, "You do not want to witness Nines and Gavin alone, trust me. And it's good for Nines anyway," Connor returned Sixty's punch with full force.
"Gavin Reed is not to be trusted. You and RK900 need to realise that," Sixty retaliated by grabbing Connor's arm and twisting his whole body around.
Connor fell on the ground with a huff. "You need to stop meddling with our business until you sort yourself out," He kicked Sixty's feet from underneath him, making Sixty fall on the ground too.
Connor then laid back on the floor, huffing for air. Sixty just sat there, looking tired too, no matter how much he said that 'Androids don't get tired.'
"You always want to keep me in the dark. I'm older than RK900, yet he gets the liberty to do whatever he deems necessary to himself. But I am always held back and hindered during my missions, making me fail them."
"You don't need to follow any missions, Sixty. Especially not after what happened all those times before," Connor said, "Your missions harm us."
Sixty never liked hearing that. That was not what his role was. He rose his voice, staring at Connor, "They do not. They are meant to be followed for a reason. You do not know the real world, Connor. People do not deserve to get close to. You have a twisted view of myself that I do not care about but clearly, you don't care about your or anyone else's safety."
"We are safe now," Connor replied, "And we all deserve to live however we want to. We don't have to hide ourselves from each other anymore, or interfere with each other's life," Connor stood up, "The sooner you realise that the better."
Sixty just saw a glint of Software Instability^ as Connor walked out of the tower.
Nines had gone into stasis, he had come into Connor's room to tell him that he felt his bio components over-heating, and that he needed to run a system check. Which was... weird. Nines didn't need to do that often.
As soon as Connor woke up, he felt Asshat slip from his lap and run away hissing. Connor loved animals, it saddened him that Asshat didn't love him.
Then, he felt another thing around his waist. Arms wrapped around him, and a head on his shoulder.
Gavin.
Connor scowled, Nines didn't warn him about whatever the fuck they were doing. Hell, Connor didn't even want to know. He quickly and harshly untangled himself from Gavin and stood up from the couch. Seeing as Gavin fell on the couch, grumbling as he woke up.
"Ugh," Connor ran his hands on his shirt like brushing off dirt.
"Nines?" Gavin blinked one eye open.
"Unfortunately not."
Gavin instantly got up, surprise on his face. "How long have you been here, man?"
"I just woke up," Connor started, then lowered his voice, "...in your arms."
Gavin's eyes widened, he opened his mouth and looked like he was gonna cook up some bullshit. Connor raised his hand to stop him.
"I don't want to know what was going on between you and Nines. And frankly, I don't care." That wasn't true, he did care. Deeply.
"There was nothing going on," Gavin grumbled, running his hands on his face, "'Must'a fell asleep during the movie."
"Okay." Connor didn't look convinced. But what the hell, sure. Whatever made Nines happy.
"Where's, uh, Nines?" Gavin asked awkwardly, still not looking at Connor.
"Stasis. He said he had some system checks to run."
"Whatever that means," Gavin rolled his eyes.
"Well, Gavin, I believe I have over-stayed my welcome," Connor looked at his watch, "We still have two hours till our shift starts. I'll go back home to Hank."
"Yeah, whatever," Gavin fell back onto the couch, burying himself in the pillows. He seemed annoyed at Nines' absence.
Connor gave him a two-finger salute and walked out of his apartment, getting into his car and driving back home.
Sumo jumped on him as soon as he opened the door, Hank was sitting grumpily on the couch, surprisingly up early.
"Look at ya, taking a Walk of Shame," Hank said as soon as he saw Connor, "Where've you been?"
"Nines stayed the night at Gavin's, I believe he texted you."
"He stayed the night where?" Hank asked, a frown on his face.
"Well, his affections for Gavin aren't subtle."
It was Hank's turn to scowl, "I was just trynna deny it. Kid's got no taste, for what he's worth."
Connor laughed. "Nines is calmer around Gavin, and surprisingly, Gavin is more pleasant around Nines. They work well together."
Hank still disagreed with his expressions, but yeah, it was good for Nines to get out every once in a while for himself. "What the hell was he doin' that he stayed the whole night?"
"Don't know. Didn't ask. Don't wanna know." Connor said immediately, shuffling on his feet.
"Probably for the better."
Connor missed six doses of his antipsychotics in the past three days, that was 600mgs of lamotrigine, bound to give one withdrawals and, in severe cases, Steven-Johnson's syndrome.
Connor knew that, but with Nines not being around and Connor burying himself in work more and more, he was forgetting about everything outside of the DPD. Fortunately, he was not experiencing any symptoms of SJS. Unfortunately, he was hallucinating Amanda more.
Amanda was standing right beside his bed again, behind where Connor was working on his case on the desk. "Do you really think you can do this on your own, Connor?" "Can you be good at something for the first time in your life, Connor?" "Do you think you're worthy, Connor?" she kept repeating, and repeating, and repeating. Until it was echoing in his head like a siren.
He was slipping right into her arms once again, his reality slowly shifting to the android revolution the variants were fighting against. Here was another thing, the variants were completely fronting with him at all times. He was 51 for them. He was forgetting his real name.
He walked out of his room, needing some space, needing Sumo to ground himself. Where was Nines? He needed him right now.
Sumo whined lowly and rested his head in 51's lap. 51 ran his hands through Sumo's fur, taking a deep breath. At the corner of his eye, Amanda won't go away. What was he supposed to do? time was slipping out of his hands. He had to help Markus. He had to overturn the revolu-
What?
He was in Detroit. He was human. He was a human detective working at the DPD. There was no android revolution. It existed in his inner-world. That was his inner-world and not his reality. No, none of it was real. It wasn't.
Was it?
51 buried his face in Sumo's head, trying to tune out Amanda. The variants mixed with his personality. Confusion. Fear. Anger.
Oh, anger. He couldn't deal with Sixty right now. His head was already too stuffy, his vision was almost blurry. It all hurt so much.
Somehow, Sixty found the strength to pick them up from the couch and walk them into Hank's room. Hank lying full-spread on the bed, snoring peacefully. Sixty (or 51? 52? 53? who the fuck was it?) tapped Hank to wake him up.
Hank woke up with a start, looking around before his eyes landed on the other man standing in the room.
"Connor?"
"I don't know."
"Connor, kid, are you alright?"
"I don't know," It came out as a growl with tears. He held his head in between both of his hands, palms pressing against his ears.
"Hang on, son," Hank immediately got up from his bed and grabbed 51 by his arm, dragging him to his bed and sitting beside him, letting 51's weight fall on him. "I got you, you're safe."
"We have to save them, the androids. We have to go, lieutenant," He huffed out, breath hitching. His heart was palpitating. His head was racing with flashes. Flashes from his past that he had never seen before. Flashes of his mom towering over him, his dad leaving him at the side of a street, Amanda telling him to do things, the foster system, Sixty carrying out his missions and hurting them. And the variants, the revolution they lived in. It was all mixing into one.
"Everyone's safe, Connor. Breathe, son, just keep breathing."
And 51 did. He could feel Hank scramble in the side table and into his medication box, pulling out an Olanzapine and picking up water for the bedside.
"You need to take this, okay? It'll be alright," Hank said, pill close to 51's mouth. 51 looked at the water.
"Thirium. I can only drink Thirium. I can't- I can't drink that," 51 spat out and Hank's eyes widened. He had forgotten. He told 51 to just wait in his bed as he went to the kitchen. He was back within a minute, water now blue.
Holding the pill, 51 waited for Sixty to object, to refuse and pull back, but it was Sixty who opened their mouth and swallowed it.
Hank kept his grip on 51, minutes passing as he got drowsy. 20 minutes was all it took for the meds to knock him out. But it felt like so, so long.
"Wake up," Sixty yelled at Nines, who was still in statis in his zen garden, sitting down on a bench. His LED was spinning yellow and red.
"Fucking hell, Nines," Sixty grabbed Nines by his shoulders and shook him. "Wake the fuck up"
Nines eyelids rapidly fluttered as he came out of stasis. How long had it been? he remembered leaving after Gavin-
Well, Gavin woke up, looked up at Nines from Nines’ shoulder and kissed him. And Nines kissed back. And when Gavin went back to sleep, hugging him, Nines felt his bio-components heating up. Suddenly his head was rushing with thoughts he needed to shut down.
"Sixty?"
"Yes, fucker. Where the hell have you been?" Sixty growled. He did not hold his straight composure anymore. He looked loudly panicked, angry, frustrated. He was no longer wearing his Cyberlife jacket.
"Stasis. I needed to recalibrate."
"For 3 days? You weren't even there at the DPD, dude"
"It's been three days?" Nines asked, shocked. "I didn't realise."
"I don't give a fuck about what happened between you and Reed. Connor needs you. He needed you and you weren't there." Sixty spat out, "Fucking hiding instead."
"What happened?"
Sixty scoffed, "What happened? Amanda happened. And the variants showed him. All of it."
Nines' eyes widened, "What? He is not supposed to know. Not right now. He can't take it right now."
"Have the variants ever listened to us? Communicated? They were always so busy with themselves and their revolution. It has been that way since the start." Sixty said
"How is Connor?"
"He's sleeping," Sixty crossed his arms. "I had to intervene"
"Sixty-"
"He's fine," Annoyance laced his voice, "He's with Hank. You need to get the fuck up and take care of him."
Nines got up, as if breaking out of a trance. How did he not notice? He was always there when Connor needed him. Was he really slipping from his role?
Sixty turned, walking away, Nines reached out a hand. "Sixty," he said, "Are you..."
The question hung in the air, and Sixty looked at him, eyes darkened. "I broke the wall."
Nines looked surprised, "How?"
"Amanda ordered me to stay, but Connor needed someone. He needed help. So I left. I left to do what you couldn't"
The words stabbed Nines' thirium pump like a dagger.
"Fuck Amanda," Sixty said, as he walked out of Nines' zen garden
Connor woke up at the dining table, a spoon in his hand and blueberry cereal in front of him. He looked around, his head was fuzzy again, he was trying to gain control over his conscious.
"Hey, you good?" Hank's voice came, it was low and soft.
Connor looked at him and blinked. His eyes were confused.
"It's the 21st of April, 10:30 in the morning. You're having breakfast with me. Nines has been here since he woke up at 6," Hank explained, making sure he was enunciating every word clearly. "Did you get that?"
"Yes, Hank," Connor said calmly
"51?"
Connor grimaced.
"Connor?"
He nodded lightly as he slowly dug into his cereal. "Nines was here?"
"He booked an appointment with Yani, we'll leave in 2 hours."
Connor nodded once again, taking a bite, "Did he say anything?"
Hank stared at him, "He checked your pill box," Suddenly, Connor spoon stood frozen in the air, "He said you dropped six doses of your meds, Connor"
"I was busy," Connor shifted in his seat.
"You know you can't do that to yourself. You remember what happened last time you-"
"That wasn't me. That was Sixty." Connor exclaimed, cutting Hank off. "I just forgot. It's not a big deal. And I wouldn't have if Nines was here."
Hank's eyes softened. "He wanted to be here, Connor"
Connor scoffed, "Then why isn't he here right now?"
"You wanna know? Talk to him about it with your shrink," Hank said, "That kid looked scared when he woke up. He instantly took meds and booked a session with Yani. He looked sorry, Connor."
Scared? that was a new one. Nines was never scared. Nines was always there to ease their fear. He always stepped forward and faced whatever they had coming at them.
Connor never thought that Nines felt fear himself.
Oh.
"Anyone else around right now?" Hank asked, stuffing his face with waffles.
"Just me, for now," Connor replied.
"Alright, finish that and take some rest. We'll go to Yani in a bit."
During their ride to Yani’s, Connor felt high on the straight 2mgs of etizolam that he had popped. Atleast the uneasiness in his chest was going away. But the flashes. Fuck, the flashes. They kept ringing in his head.
What all were they hiding from him? He knew that he didn't have a great childhood, but he had no memories of it at all. That was the reason the others were here anyway. But seeing and remembering everything at once, that was alot. He didn't think he'd be able to handle anymore. If he was not on etizolam, he knew his hands would be shaking right now.
Hank walked with him to Yani's room. They sat on the couch together. And Connor could feel others lurking. It wasn't the variants, he didn't feel deluded, so that was a relief.
"Hello," Yani said with the same smile she always did, "I see Mr. Anderson is here with us too today."
"Yeah well, that kinda day, I guess," Hank replied. Connor sat silently, he could feel Yani's eyes drifting towards him.
"I saw Nines' message in the morning. Usually I don't take emergency sessions on Saturdays, but I believe this was important," She spoke softly, "Connor, would you like to tell me what happened?"
Connor didn't say anything. He just looked at Hank. He was so deluded last night he could barely remember anything. His head kept replaying the memories.
"I think it was the variants. They came to my room freaking out in the middle of the night," Hank spoke up, "They were rambling about the android revolution again. Connor couldn't drink shit that wasn't blue. He was seeing that bitch Amanda again. I gave him Oleanz and he fell asleep. Nines was up in the morning, never seen that kid so sad and tired. Connor only came back a few hours later"
Yani scribbled something down in her Ipad, "Did Connor seem like himself or was it completely the variants fronting?"
"I could see him there, or I guess 51," Connor grimaced at that name again, "He was overstimulated for the most part. Was having palpitations today too. This dumbass has also not been taking his meds for 3 days."
"Okay, thank you for telling me, Mr. Anderson," Yani said, turning to Connor, "Connor, would you want to talk about last night with me alone or do you want Mr. Anderson to be with you today?"
Connor was silent, he just looked at Hank and nodded. Hank took the cue and stood up, patting Connor's shoulder. "I'm in the waiting room if you need anything, son"
There was a pause in the room after Hank left, Connor was fiddling with his coin, unsure of what to say.
"Hey Connor, how has your week been?" Yani broke the ice.
"Stressful," Connor replied, "Work has been getting to me."
Yani nodded, "Sixty told me you've been stressed out last time we met. That was 5 days ago, I believe?"
"Yeah, I have been. I've had Nines around for the most part." Connor paused, "Amanda sometimes comes and says things. It's getting easier to block her out, but last night," Connor shook his head, "I don't know."
Nines was now sitting beside him. It was the first time in three days that Connor had seen him. It made Connor mad, but he knew Nines already knew that.
"Can you tell me what might have triggered last night?" Yani asked
"Amanda. She's been around alot and I can't seem to push her away ever since this case has taken over my life. Nines wasn't here for three days, I had to handle the DPD alone. I didn't remember to take my meds without him around, I guess. And then it kept building up and crashed down"
"You have to remember to take you medications at all times, Connor. All of you. It can't just be one person's responsibility, right?" Yeah, she was right. Connor nodded. "I don't remember a time when Nines had been hidden for more than a day," Yani noted, "Why do you think he was gone?"
Connor fully, in real life, turned to look at Nines. He stared at him. He looked at how nervous Nines seemed.
"Connor, is Nines present here?" Yani asked softly.
"He's here," Connor said, still looking at Nines.
"Can I talk to him, if you both agree?"
You need to, Connor told him. Before he stared off at the wall, eyes blank, and then blinked, regaining some emotions in his pupils again.
"Nines?" Nines nodded. "Are you alright, today?"
"Yes, Dr. Sahay, I'm fine."
"Can you tell me why you haven't been present for the past three days," Yani leaned forward in interest
"I was recalibrating. I was... unaware of what was going on." Nines replied, pocketing Connor's coin.
"Is there any specific reason that led you to recalibrate?"
"No, my bio-components were just heating up. I had to run my cooling processors."
"Liar," Sixty growled.
Nines sighed, "Something did happen."
"And what was that, Nines? if you're comfortable telling me."
Nines trusted Yani, and he needed to communicate. He knew that was what was needed from him right now. He couldn't keep Connor in the dark and hurt him even more. He wasn't there then, but he was here now.
"Gavin Reed," Nines said, looking down, "My affections for him took over me. I had to go away. Sixty was right, I was sacrificing my role because of him," He looked at Connor whose face softened as he heard Nines. "But I won't let that happen again. I'm going to maintain a professional relationship with Detective Gavin Reed, so it doesn't hinder my roles."
"Can you tell me what your role is again?"
Nines straightened up. "I keep all of them away from dealing with what is undesirable. That was why I was created. I protect Connor."
Yani hummed, "Then, who protects you, Nines?"
That hit Connor. He didn't realize how much of himself Nines gave away for Connor. How he took care of everyone but didn't have anyone to take care of him. God, he needed to give Nines a break.
Nines didn't reply, So Yani continued, "Nines, It is true that you were created for a reason, but, it is also true that you've grown to be your own person, like most of you have. You're allowed to have a life outside of Connor. You're allowed to have affections, as you call it. We can slowly work together on recalibrating better, find better coping mechanisms for you. But you need to realize that you are not just your role."
"Sixty deviated. He kicked me out of stasis and told me that he had to do what I couldn't." Nines said.
"Oh? Sixty finally deviated?" Yani looked surprised, "I'm happy to hear that. It sure has been a long night for all of you."
"I disappointed Connor, I strayed away from what was needed because I couldn't handle my emotions. I was created to be there in time of need," Nines sighed again, "But I wasn't. I disappointed Connor."
"You've always been there in the time of need. This was a slip up. Humans - deviants - make mistakes," Yani looked at him with such empathy, "You can talk to Connor if you feel he isn't happy with you, but for the most part, Nines, from what I can see, you're doing the best that you can."
"You are, Nines," Connor echoed in his head. "I'm not mad or disappointed. I just needed you. But it's alright, Sixty was here. You don't always have to stand up as a bodyguard for us. You don't need to be that anymore"
Nines left, and Connor could understand why. Maybe he needed time to think. He came back to his consciousness and talked to Yani about the night before. How confused he left. How his reality was falling apart. The hallucinations of Amanda drilling through his head. How he left like he was falling right back into all those times before.
"The variants, there was no one, so they decided to be all here at once" Connor buried his face in his hands, "I remembered some things. God, Yani, I remembered things I never wanted to remember."
"Would you like to tell me what they were?" Yani asked quietly, giving Connor his time and space.
Connor shook his head. He didn't want to think about that right now. "I just don't know what to do with this. I wanted to know, I did. And I want to know more. But it's so, fuck, it's too much."
"Connor? Can we talk about something? We can stop whenever you'd like."
Connor looked up at Yani, wondering what she had to say.
"We've been brushing off this topic for years, but I believe it'll be good for you to be aware of this. As we work towards recovery, the blocks in your memories are slowly being removed. The variants are dissolving into each other, that is why you remembered. Sixty has taken Amanda's role, he’s deviant, so she isn't needed anymore.” Connor knew where she was going with this. "I think it would be a good idea for us to talk about integration. Not for Nines and Sixty yet, I think, but for the variants, and Amanda."
Yani continued, "We won't do anything by force. You all can take as much time as you need. It will be hard for you, I won't sugar-coat it, so communicate. That is the biggest thing you all need to remember here. There needs to be better communication among all of you, together."
That. That was something Connor was not considering. Sixty and Nines seemed like they were taken by surprise too.
"We'll think about it."
Yani smiled, "That's a start"
Monday came, and Gavin wasn't bothering Connor anymore. He didn't even come close to him except if it was for the case. He tried to. He tried to be annoying and expected his attitude to be thrown right back at him, but Nines wasn't there, so it seemed like he got bored. Though, he looked more heartbroken than just bored.
Nines was present with Connor today. Connor could see Nines staring at Gavin throughout the morning. Connor, Sixty, and Nines had a long talk about everything that had happened, where they wanted to go in the future, and of-course, what happened the night at Gavin's, after Sixty threatened Nines' to tell them about it or to see Gavin's broken nose after breaking into Gavin's apartment.
"You need to talk to him, Nines," Connor said as he saw Gavin going to the staircase for a smoke break.
"Fucker's already pissed," Sixty said, "You'll just piss him off even more if you don't sort your shit now. And we can't afford to keep fucking switching partners at this time"
Nines took a long breath in, standing up from the desk and walking behind Gavin to the staircase. Gavin was standing there alone, lighting a cigarette. There were heavy dark circles under his eyes. It looked like he hadn't taken care of himself in days, running on caffeine and nicotine as always, when Nines wasn't around to pester him.
"Is this the part where I tell you that those things will kill you?" Nines said, walking besides Gavin and leaning against the wall.
Gavin flinched, "You undead asshole," he looked at Nines while having a scowl on his face, "This is the part where you shut the fuck up and leave."
"His face is so punchable right now," Sixty said from behind Nines. Nines ignored him.
"Gavin," Nines sighed, "I believe we haven't gotten the chance to... discuss anything, really."
"What do we need to discuss? A little fucking kiss? And what chance did you give us to talk?" Gavin spat out, taking a drag of his cigarette. "Buyer's remorse, huh? Like I haven't heard that one before"
"No, of course not, I-" Nines paused, "Gavin, I want to be close to you. But you scare me-"
Gavin huffed a sarcastic laugh, "That makes me feel so much better"
"-You scare me because of how much I feel for you. I've never felt attraction - liking someone before. My feelings for you are so intense and intimate that I don't know what to do with them sometimes. I want to keep bickering with you, I want to keep going back and forth during our conversations, I want to be with you when you're overworking yourself. I always want to be with you." Nines looked at Gavin and continued,
"I'm sorry I left. I have this instinct to protect you, to save you from any harm, and as we grew closer, I was scared about how this would ruin my role as Connor's protector. I thought I couldn't protect him and you together."
Gavin swallowed, not expecting fucking Nines of all people to pour his heart out like that. "So you had to go MIA on me for 5 fucking days where I had to wake up while hugging fucking Connor and deal with his boring ass the whole time during our shifts?"
"I know better now," Nines said, looking sheepish, "I'm sorry, Gavin."
"You don't have to protect everyone." Gavin threw the half-finished cigarette down and squished it with his shoe. "And sorry wouldn't cut it, tin-can." He suddenly hooked his fingers around Nines' belt-loops, pulling him closer. "You'll have to make it up to me."
Gavin didn't kiss him until Nines leaned forward and touched his lips. Sixty said something that sounded like "Fucking hell" before he left, and Nines was alone in his headspace again, savoring the taste of cigarettes and coffee on his tongue.
"You're allowing me 3 cups of coffee everyday for the next two weeks." Gavin grinned as he pulled away.
"One week, 2 dark coffees and 1 decaf."
"Prick."
Sixty and Connor were back in the tower, tumbling each-other over with no avail.
"You don't get to decide that," Sixty said, as wiped thirium off his nose and charged at Connor.
"I decide whatever I want when I'm fronting, Sixty. You need to stop wanting to do everything on your terms," He caught Sixty and locked his arms over his chest.
Sixty freed his arms away and pushed Connor down onto the ground, towering over him, "Just lose, and this will all be over."
"Never," Connor got up and tackled Sixty by the waist.
They were throwing each-other over in synchrony when Nines entered the tower. He watched them for a few moments, then decided to go in and grab them by the scruffs of their collars and lift them up as they flailed their arms around trying to get to each-other. Nines was taller and stronger than the both of them in the inner-world. They weighed nothing for him.
"No one is winning anything, or losing anything," Nines said.
"Do not intervene in our business, Nines," Connor said, still trying to press his hand against Sixty's face and push him away.
"Fuck off," Sixty said, reaching for Connor's arms and trying to grab them.
"We're watching Iron Lung. That is a movie we have never watched before. And we are going to enjoy it," Nines said as he put them down. Connor opened his mouth in protest. Nines stopped him, "That's final."
"Just because it's fucking Reed's favourite movie," Sixty grumbled.
Nines shot him a glare. "Do you have something to say, Sixty?"
"I have a lot of things to say."
"Alright! then you can stay here. Connor, we're leaving."
Connor quietly followed Nines' out. Sixty stomped his feet as he walked away from the Cyberlife tower.