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IMPERIAL CAPITAL CITY, BERUN
“Hey Serebryakov, what's with you and the Captain?” Weiss asked.
Viktoriya choked on the soup she had been scarfing down as she registered the question and stared at the man dumbly as if she couldn't comprehend what he had said.
“Oh leave her alone, Weiss. It's bad enough she is gonna be that demon's wingman. Seriously though, you have my condolences, Lieutenant. Going through all of this, just to get stuck five feet at the furthest from her for the rest of the war,” Neumann consoled as he placed a large hand on her shoulder, almost sounding genuine. Almost. “God must love you, Serebryakov. “
Viktoriya’s brain finally caught up to the conversation. She wiped her mouth and gave Neumann her brightest smile before swiftly punching him in the diaphragm. A harsh wheeze escaped the giant man as he doubled over.
“Thank you for your concern,” she muttered with most of her frustration coming not from the interaction, but rather being interrupted during the most sacred of times: chow. “Weiss, what did you mean by that?” she asked kindly, her eyes wide with mock innocence as her most recent victim wheezed on the floor.
A chorus of laughter echoed from the table at the giant man's misfortune. The collection of squad commanders and their seconds were made up of those who led the way during their trip through hell. All of them were gathered at this private table, enjoying the luxury of a hot meal. It was simple fare, but given this was the first meal they enjoyed that wasn't made up entirely of military provisions, they may as well be dining in Valhalla. Decorum felt like it was such a farcical concept when the person next to you had pissed themselves in a trench trying to keep you alive. Allegedly at least, the story had been passed around at this point but tacitly, no names seemed to come up during its telling.
If anyone had asked the opinions of their peers, they would proudly declare them insane. All of them knew that at some level, they were permanently altered mentally, possibly spiritually, and that was ignoring the literal magical mental scarring given to them by their instructor, now commander.
“I don’t mean anything bad by it, but it's just that you didn't seem surprised by any of it. Hell, after the barracks exploded you were the first to take off,” Weiss explained. “I also noticed that every time the Captain offered the chance to quit, she looked straight at you.”
“Well, we were on the Rhine together,” Viktoriya started, nervous at the sudden attention, “andshewasmychildhoodfriend.” The words poured out of her before she returned to her soup with gusto.
All sounds of eating cut out as Viktorya had the complete attention of every officer there. She slurped at her soup, content to ignore them if possible.
“Wait, are you serious?” the normally poised Koenig asked, his eyes wide in awe.
“Serebryakov, you've been holding out on us?!” 2nd Lieutenant Lina Weber, one of the few women who had passed through the trials of V624, yelled over the table.
Viktoriya didn't know her very well and even during the various challenges she only saw her a handful of times. What she had heard was that during the artillery barrage Lina held her position for twelve hours, with her neighboring mages quitting and leaving her to defend an ever growing quadrant of sky. Lina was slightly shorter and skinnier than her, with dirty blonde hair and hazel eyes.
Apparently during the climb up the Alpen mountains, she carried two other candidates on her back after the avalanche alongside Neumann, who described her as “stubborn to a fault”. From their brief talks, she had learned that Lina had six older brothers who she blamed unabashedly that were the cause of her stubborn attitude.
“I don’t know what you're talking about. Anyways, shouldn't we order dessert?” Viktoriya asked, desperately trying to change the subject. She really missed Lotte. As much as she wanted to call it a betrayal, when Lotte volunteered to bow out at the last minute, her friend's words rang too close to home for her to hold any grudges.
“I'm sorry Visha, but if it wasn't for Alexandra I wouldn’t have made it here. I'm willing to do just about anything if it meant I was flying next to her. Knowing I can't if I stayed…I can't do it. I'll see you when the war is over, okay?”
“Serebryakov, we swear nothing will leave this room, but I'll be honest. I can't imagine the Captain acting like a normal child, let alone making a friend with someone while doing it.” Weiss had known of her time on the Rhine; it also explained how quick she was to react, but the idea that their tormentor actually had a childhood felt incongruent with his experience.
Viktoriya sighed in defeat, knowing none of them would drop the topic. As a form of coping, complaining or bad mouthing, Tanya had become a form of bonding that even she had participated in, partly just to vent some of her personal frustrations she held on her enigmatic friend. Of course, Viktoriya still held great respect for Tanya, and after literally crying in the young girl's arms, felt too guilty about joining in since.
“She wasn’t. Normal, I mean. Tany- er, Captain Degurechaff has always been…intense,” Viktoriya said, choosing her words carefully.
Neumann, apparently recovered, interjected: “Wait, I gotta know. Were her eyes always like that or did she actually make a deal with the devil or something? Or is it a Rus thing? My grandma, on my mom's side, is from Rus and she only has blue eyes.”
Viktoriya blinked at him, unsure if he was actually asking or just teasing her. However, Neumann looked completely earnest in his inquiry. “Well, I can say that she has always had red eyes, at least from the age of three.”
Immediately there was a cacophony of inquiries and sound as the various officers were struck with the impossible image of the flying devil known as Captain Degurechaff being a toddler.
“I'm sorry, Serebryakov, but you can't just stop at that! What was she even like as a three year old?” Koenig asked, completely taken by curiosity. He had already pledged himself to follow the Captain after she literally kicked him back from death's door. While he knew logically that she didn't just appear from nothing, the Captain’s existence felt more mythological than that of a teenage girl.
“Uh, well she was smart. Terrifyingly smart. I wasn’t sure she was human, at first. She already spoke better than I could at six, but she was kind. In her own way. We used to dance as kids, but looking back I think she was humoring me,” Viktoriya looked down, hands in her lap as she started clenching on the fabric. Shame filled her and her eyes began to water.
“Oh shit. Neumann! You made her cry!” Lina yelled in outrage, kicking the giant man. Unlike Viktoriya, she hadn’t aimed for any vital areas so it amounted to an annoyance at worst.
“Alright, that's enough everyone. Serebryakov, my deepest apologies if we made you uncomfortable,” Weiss said. He had gotten up from his seat to comfort the young woman to the best of his abilities, which he admittedly knew was rather poor.
“I'm telling Tanya,” Viktoriya's threat turned the officer’s blood into ice.
No one wanted to piss off the Captain, but pissing off Tanya? That was an unknown danger. Their minds conjured terrible visions of a demon of the Wild Hunt unbound by the limiting chains of the military, which she already flagrantly bent.
“Wait! We're sorry, honest! You don't have to do that! I-I'll pay for two desserts!” Weiss was panicking, he wasn't alone in that, but since he was the idiot who brought the topic up the threat of danger felt far too imminent.
“Hey! Me too! Come on, Serebryakov, we didn't mean anything, let's just have some cake, yeah?” Neumann, as his recent training had instilled, immediately jumped to resolve the issue. In his mind he quickly mapped out the nearest exit in case their appeasement failed. Maybe if he made it to the Rhine, the Francois soldiers could get to him before the Captain did.
Viktoriya looked up, still pouting, and demanded with deathly seriousness: “Chocolate cake and Bienenstich. Also, a tin of Dallmayr coffee beans.”
Weiss and other company commanders winced at the request. Even before the war, Dallmayr was pricey, but now a single tin could easily cost their entire monthly stipend. As Viktorya frowned at their response, Weiss, as the vice commander and honorable Imperial soldier he was, forced a smile and nodded.
“Of course! This stays between us. Right?” He'd be damned if he was going to suffer alone but if everyone pitched in, the request wasn't too unreasonable.
Viktoriya gave him a bright smile and at once all the tension in the room vanished. “Of course! Besides, the coffee is for the Captain, so think of it as an investment.”
Hearing that the murmurs and mumbling of agreement sounded out, knowing their money would be well spent if it kept the little tyrant happy. If there was anyone who knew how to do that, they were certain that Lieutenant Serebryakov was the best equipped to do so.
Best keep the spirits happy lest they become demons.
ZUGSPITZE TRAINING GROUNDS, POST RITUAL
Lotte felt terrible. Well, more terrible, given all the aches and pains she had collected over the past five weeks. She knew voluntarily bowing out at the eleventh hour was going to hurt Visha, but she just couldn't imagine fighting in this war without Alexandra at her side. The larger-than-life woman and Visha were her only constants during this nightmare, but where Visha was like a torch leading the way, Alexandra was at her side following in the dark.
She had to admit that Visha’s admiration of Captain Degurechaff had become painfully familiar. The idea that just being next to someone was enough to survive the war seemed so absurd before all of this. Now, after being dragged, carried, and dragging and carrying another she understood. It wasn’t a guarantee, but it was damn close.
She trusted everyone here with her life implicitly, but Alexandra? She trusted her to lead. Captain Degurechaff was insane, but more than that, in a different life she couldn't imagine a better officer to follow. Lotte was one of the few who were unable to escape the barn on their own. It was Alexandra who pulled her out first and she would never forget that moment.
Visha’s eyes never left the Captain and she understood it wasn’t just respect, but a goal to strive towards. During the march up the Alpen mountains and even through the avalanche, so long as Lotte knew where Alexandra was, she could put one foot in front of the other.
Throughout every absurd and impossible challenge, Alexandra kept a grin on her face; sometimes in defiance, other times in encouragement. It was a sight that kept Lotte’s spirit only treading water instead of outright drowning in misery. It was because of all of those experiences that Lotte was at a complete loss on how to deal with the situation she found herself in.
It had been two days since the Captain had bestowed the vstavlya upon them. While the novelty of instant access to knowledge was tempered by the immediate and painful consequences, it was still new and exciting. Most of them, however, wanted nothing more than to enjoy the hot showers and (comparably) soft beds. Alexandra and I had taken one of the few female cabins, with the other female officers happy to enjoy some minor seclusion after weeks of being shoulder to shoulder. Years of social norms and decorum died in foxholes under artillery fire or in the damp dark confines of the barn.
So why was she, a daughter of a middling businessman, watching arguably the most powerful woman in the Empire spiral over her appearance?
“Lotte, I'm revolting aren't I?” Alexandra lamented, facing away from the Lieutenant as she stared at her reflection with disgust.
These lodgings were built to be used by noblewomen who were not expected to fight in the mud and blood of today's battles and had all the amenities needed to preserve one's appearance. Provided, of course, that you brought your own supplies.
This wasn’t the first time Lotte had seen the princess in her undergarments, but unlike the before, she found it difficult to keep her eyes off the woman. Their time during training had been harsh on their bodies, with all of them losing some weight. As Alexandra now looked at the very clear muscle definition she now sported in disgust, Lotte was trying not to drool.
Lotte never saw the princess's body fully before, but in newspaper pictures she seemed to always have held a silhouette that would drive most women mad with envy. Now, under her uniform, her arms, legs, shoulders, and back seemed almost chiseled of muscle with little fat, even her stomach now displaying defined abdominal muscles. She had lost some of that lithe appearance with muscle filling in along her waist. If God had chosen her family to lead the Empire, Lotte could see it. At least physically; despite everything they had gone through, Alexandra's bust and rear seemed mostly unmarred by the hellish training. Perhaps an increase in musculature made up for the loss?
Alexandra saw the signs of lower class toil at best, and a musclebound beast at worst in her new physique. She knew it was stupid, she was a soldier damn it, but she was also a princess, and had been in that profession much longer. It was that very profession that had given her the skills to transition into an effective soldier. Regimented, highly structured expectations? Please, it was adorable compared to learning first orders in a ball. Uncomfortable uniforms and minute scrutiny? Child's play next court dresses, performing perfectly to a crowd of critics, and the ever scathing eyes of the noble court. She was molded to be a leader since the age of six, so even commanding fell in easy. The most brutal exams of the military hardly reached the ever-growing standards her governess held.
The princess wondered if she could even fit in her court dress looking like this? She was already in her twenties, and this blasted war made building connections via marriage seem farcical. Would they even let her stay in the military when the war ended? She could already hear her governess Anna’s rebukes about her body, and Baroness Lenzhen's harsh criticisms scratched gouging into her ego.
Alexandra’s frown deepened as her hands traced the new scars she had acquired. Both her father and the General Staff understood it wasn’t possible for her to actively participate in the war and leave unscathed. However with the backing of the Royal Crown and the advancements in magical medicine since the introduction of the computation orb, it wasn’t declared a minor concern. A long furrow from when she was thrown into the rocks during the avalanche traced its way from her hip up to her sternum. As her fingers traced the line, so did Lotte's gaze in the mirror, finding it impossible not to. Most of the long, now healing, scar was barely surface level but pockets of skin raised where jagged stone had found purchase. Alexandra shook her head as if it would throw off the biting insults in her mind before realizing there was still someone in the room.
“Lotte?” Alexandra turned around only to see her friend stunned. She would be lying if it didn’t hurt. She understood; if she saw another woman with a body like hers she would stare too, but she had hoped Lotte wouldn't have judged her so.
“Goddess,” it was but a whisper. At its utterance, the two women’s faces immediately flushed crimson.
Lotte immediately felt embarrassed by her slip, but worse was how her traitorous mind was flooded with sinful and abnormal thoughts. Her physical attraction to men wasn't in question, but now Alexandra had launched herself firmly into the top of what she found arousing and it horrified her.
It's wrong, awful, disgusting, the exact opposite of what Alexandra is, so why can't I look away? She’s the princess for God's sake! Degurechaff. It must have been her cursed ritual. I never felt this way before the vstavlya.
Alexandra had been complimented all her life, from endlessly shallow “so pretty"s to literal poems specifically crafted in an attempt to woo her, but not once had any of them held such earnest reverence. That one word was filled with a fervent hunger and her friend's gaze was so transfixed on her, it was as if she was spellbound. It was a gaze she had seen before. Amongst the game of courtship and posturing, there was always some prowling suitor with such eyes, lusting above his station.
Lusting.
The novelty of a woman lusting over her was far less repulsive than Alexandra had imagined it could be. In fact, it was far more interesting.
Ha! Tanya, maybe you have driven me mad. If I said such a thing out loud, it would cause Governess Anna to faint in outrage. The church and the newspapers would run riot at the very idea.
Alexandra had always pursued the interesting with gusto. History, piano, combat magic, her new terrifying friend, and now Lotte had joined in. Still, she had her station to consider, as well as her rank. This might even be just a passing delusion for the poor girl. If it was, then wouldn't it be a shame to not see all her new reactions while it was still fresh?
Just a little bit of chivalric bonding between girls.
She would not touch the Lieutenant; not that she even knew where to proceed with that line of thought. A new topic to study, how wonderful! No, for now, in exchange for being ogled at, she would simply use the tools she honed initially to ensnare her potential husband-to-be, to test the waters as it were. Alexandra gave Lotte a wolfish smile that stole the young officer’s breath away. Truly, she was thankful that friend had managed to dispel her worries, albeit in an entirely unorthodox and unexpected way.
She stepped towards the scarlet faced Lieutenant as if she were a predator, hungry and ready to claim her stunned prey. Lotte’s eyes widened at that, and her brain sent conflicting and panicked signals that spanned from running away screaming to lunging at the princess and hoping her imagination would work as a substitute to experience.
The amusement that glittered in the princess's eyes seemed to evaporate all the moisture in Lotte’s mouth as her body dumped adrenaline in quantities it had been remiss to, even during literal life or death situations. She knew. She knew Lotte was staring at her- no, leering like some vulgar pervert. Deep shame filled her gut as her hands began to shake from the chemical concoction that was running rampant in her veins.
“A-Alexandra? Ma'am?” she stuttered, taking a step back, though her body demanded action as her mind reeled. Now keenly aware that she herself only had her undershirt, and undergarments to cover her.
“Yes~?” Alexandra purred, unable to keep her grin from growing at the absolute panic in her friend's eyes. Perhaps she was more cruel than she realized; still, she didn't want to harm the poor girl. Really, all she was doing was walking to her bunk, she couldn't be blamed for trying to dress herself, could she?
Lotte, unable to handle the overwhelming pressure of the princess as she stopped just in front of her, looked down in a panic. A grave mistake, as she promptly found her face buried in the princess' bosom.
Soft, warm, strong.
Those were the only thoughts that managed to escape before her mind screeched at her. She flung herself backwards, stumbling to the floor. She stared up wide eyed, unable to catch her breath, only for the princess to calmly step over her and begin to put on her uniform.
“You should be more careful~, Lotte. It's dangerous to be so distracted,” Alexandra said, her voice dripping with intent as she dressed slowly and deliberately.
Lotte’s mind short circuited, unable to comprehend the sheer volume of conflicting emotions. Hunger, shame, lust, disgust, cruel hope, and crushing fear swirled in a maelstrom fueled by adrenaline. Her mind raced through terrible scenarios, salacious possibilities, and the impossible. Before it could drag her into insanity, a hand manifested into her view.
Alexandra, now dressed in her flightsuit was smiling down at her, hand out stretched. There was no judgment in her eyes, no justifiable hate, only confidence, fondness and trust. It was the same look that had empowered her to continue, to endure. She took the hand, and the princess lifted her to her feet with ease. Alexandra placed a hand on her shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze, making an unanticipated shudder run through Lotte’s body.
“You're my wingman, aren’t you? If something is distracting you, I'm happy to lend a hand,” her words were spoken in what Lotte recognized as the princess's ‘professional’ tone. She wasn’t sure if she was relieved or disappointed to not hear the undercurrent of hungry teasing.
Heat radiated from Lotte, from her ears down to her shoulders flushed red as her heart pounded in her ears. Her stomach twisted as another heat in midsection seemed to ache as strongly as her shame.
“I-I'll keep that in mind…ma'am,” Lotte replied, with the princess's ever present smile refusing to betray if she was disappointed by her response. “Let me get dressed, I heard Lieutenant Weiss had a streusel recipe he was passing around, and I don't want to be left out.”
Alexandra laughed. “Alright then. But Lotte, when it's just us, please, Alexa. Ma'am and Alexandra feel too stuffy.”
Lotte's chest felt like it was going to burst. She was desperate to escape and return to ‘normal’, or at least back to a place that was less confusing and terrifying.
And yet.
And yet how much has changed? When they left Zugspitze, her goal was still the same. Ask, negotiate, beg if she had to, to fly next to Alexandra for the rest of the war.
“I do have one thing I want to ask actually. Um, Ma- Alexa, is there a possibility that I could join your unit?” she asked, refusing to face the Princess as she dressed herself.
Another laugh, warm and loud, resounded. “Lotte, what in God’s name made you think I would give you up so easily? If there isn't, I'll make my own damn unit.”
Lotte wanted to be mad at Alexandra for causing her cheeks and ears to ignite in heat just when she had calmed down some, but she couldn't keep the almost painful grin off her face.
“Thank you,” she said, trying and failing to keep the smile out of her voice.
Deciding that this battlefield was far too dangerous to dwell in, she followed her instincts and made a strategic retreat. After all, there was valuable information to gather. The princess watched her scurry away in amusement, finding herself very pleased with the new information she had gathered.
Still, it warranted further testing. Just to be sure.