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Sholmes was certainly talented with his violin, that Ryunosuke knew for a fact. He played the sweetest melodies when the mood called for it. Iris had claimed that when she was a baby, nothing could make her fall asleep quite like Sholmes' bow playing on his violin.
So he simply didn't understand why he had to subject them all to off-key tunes when he was miserable.
"Hurley gets this way sometimes, I'm sure he'll go back to normal soon!" Iris chirped, making him realize he'd said his thoughts out loud again.
"Still... he does this every time he's upset." Susato leaned on the makeshift table with one hand, frowning. "Do emotions truly affect your talent so?"
"Everyone has their own way of coping," Ryunosuke said magnanimously. "Mine is stranger than playing a violin badly."
Sholmes pulled the bow away from Stradivarius in a grand movement, ripping a sound so sharp they all slapped their hands over their ears. Apparently oblivious, Sholmes gave them a bright grin. "Isn't that the truth, Mr. Naruhodo! If I may ask, what is it that you do to cope with inevitable doom?"
"Uh." Ryunosuke blinked. "I just... lay down under my desk. On the floor." He shrugged. "It's comforting."
"Ah! So that's what you were doing that time after—"
"Yes, thank you, Susato-san!" he interrupted her before she could say anything incriminating. She had caught him in that position multiple times, after all. She acquiesced with a giggle at his expense.
Sholmes made another grand gesture, as if to point to the whole world. "Well, we all need a little peace and quiet in the throes of depression, don't we?"
"You don't," he pointed out, "you love the sound of your violin when you're depressed."
"Oh, yeah!" Sholmes looked at his violin in wonder. "Speaking of, there is another wonderful melody I heard in the air the other day—"
And so the conversation moved on, and Ryunosuke forgot about it. Another miscellaneous day spent with his family that he should've cherished more while he still had it. Now Susato was back in Japan, and he had been disbarred.
Ryunosuke really was fine, at the start. He was more worried about how Mr. Mikotoba was faring, if he was so sick that Susato had to travel back to Japan. Now, he just felt terribly lonely without her companionship. After the loss of his best friend, Susato had been his closest confidant for months, and the attic felt empty without her.
His notes sat pathetically unused on his desk. He had been using this time off to further his studies, but there were only so many times he could look them over before the words started to blur together. At this point, he'd do anything to be back in action at the courtroom. He was almost starting to miss Prosecutor van Zieks' dramatic displays with the chalices.
He tried not to think about how he failed to achieve Kazuma's dream. He tried not to think about how disappointed he must be, if he was out there looking down on him. He tried not to think about how Susato couldn't tell him about the cat-flap. He tried not to think about how he let down everyone. He lost Kazuma, and now Susato was gone too, and really it's just a matter of time before Sholmes and Iris get sick of his moping and kick him out, and then he'll truly be alone.
He was spiraling, he realized. He got off his chair—fell off it, really—and slid to the floor, lying beneath his desk as he always did. The familiar sight of mahogany wood greeted him, but it was accompanied by something odd.
A packet of rice crisps that just so happened to be his favorite taped to the bottom of his desk, alongside a note spelling, 'Losing it all by yourself, my dearest fellow?'
It shocked him so much he forgot what he was upset about.
The conversation from months ago came back to him in waves. He had forgotten he'd even mentioned it, it hadn't been a big deal at the time other than mild embarrassment on his part. To think that afterwards, Sholmes remembered what he had said, had done something to comfort him if he found himself in this position again...
In that moment, all his emotions came crashing right back on him. He felt so stupid. Sholmes would never get rid of him like it was nothing. Eccentric as he was, he still cared.
Ryunosuke sat up so quickly that his head hit the underdesk with a dull thud. He cussed out loud in pain but ignored the throbbing to get out from underneath the desk and run out of his office, heading downstairs. He didn't know if Sholmes would even be at home right now—the man was prone to odd hours corresponding to his bursts of energy—but he needed to see him as soon as possible, if for no reason other than to assure himself.
When he did arrive in the living room, Sholmes was lounging on the couch, looking quite bored. But he perked up at the sight of Ryunosuke, a little thing that only made tears bubble up faster.
He didn't give him a chance to say anything before he threw himself onto Sholmes.
"Woah!" Sholmes caught him, let him climb onto his lap and cling to him like a koala. "Ah, it seems you've been deprived of your Sholmes time, Mr. Naruhodo—"
A sob escaped Ryunosuke, sufficiently shutting Sholmes up. He rubbed his hands down Ryunosuke's back, the younger quieting his cries pressed against his neck. If Sholmes wanted to say something, he didn't, perhaps recognizing that noise was not what Ryunosuke needed right now.
"Hurley? What's—"
Iris interrupted herself with a gasp. He didn't want her to see him crying too, this was already humiliating enough, but he didn't get the chance to escape before Iris was plastering herself behind his back in a surprisingly strong hug. And really, at this point, it was too late to stop himself.
He hid his face in Sholmes' neck, found Iris' hand to give it a squeeze. He'd been so lost in his misery that he hadn't realized he had his family right here in front of him, people who cared enough to keep him even now that he's useless.
"You're not useless, Runo!" Iris said quickly.
"Of course not. How would I devise my dances without my trusty partner?" Sholmes added.
He supposed that was true. He gestured for Iris to join them on the couch, making room for her. When she curled around the two of them, it was the most quiet his brain had been since that trial months ago, like he could finally stop running, now that he knew that if he fell, there will be people to catch him.
"You were right about one thing, though, dear Naruhodo," Sholmes murmured. "We're a family. So don't shut yourself away from us."