Chapter Text
Mione
Mione: harry, how are you doing?
Harry: i’m okay mione
Mione: yk it’s okay if you’re not
Mione: no one expects you to be all sunshine and rainbows after this year
Harry: im fine i promise
Harry: i’ll be better after i get out of this goddamn house
Mione: how are the dursley's this summer?
Harry: better than previous ones
Harry: dudley’s actually kind of okay
Harry: he hasn’t hit or chased me at all
Mione: you shouldn’t have to be worried about that kind of stuff
Harry: well yk how it is
Mione disliked a message
Mione: how about your aunt and uncle?
Harry: aunt petunia refuses to look at me and only addresses me as ‘boy’ and uncle vernon is abt the same
Harry: so its kind of like im a kid again
Mione: i wish i could get you out of there, i really do
Mione: i trust dumbledore with a lot of things, your safety is not one of them
Harry loved a message
Harry: i’ll be okay mione, i promise
Mione: if you’re sure
Harry: i am
Mione: okay, stay safe harry, i love you
Harry loved a message
Harry: love you too mione
Mione loved a message
—-
Unknown Number
Unknown: harry, is this you mate?
Unknown: its ron
Unknown: hermione gave me your thingy
Harry: my number?
Harry: and yeah its me
Harry: you got a phone??
Harry created a new contact
Ron: apparently the ministry is trying to mix muggle things with wizard life or something like that
Ron: so dad got a bunch of these box things and now i can write to you digitally!
Harry: its a phone
Harry: and its called texting ron
Harry: but thats awesome
Ron: i know right
Harry: 😭
Harry: the full sentence is killing me
Ron: what is that
Ron: the picture thing
Harry: it’s an emoji
Harry: click the little face symbol on the keyboard and theres a bunch of them
Ron: 🙂🐈😍
Harry: there you go
Ron: I LOVE IT
Ron: WAIT WHY IS IT LIKE THAT
Harry: i think you turned on caps lock mate
Harry: double tap the arrow button until it’s like unhighlighted
Ron: oh thanks
Ron: also what do you mean the full sentence is killing you?
Harry: usually when youre texting you put like acronyms/abbreviations so its not as long
Harry: like instead of i know right it would be ikr
Harry: or wdym for what do you mean
Ron: oh that makes sense
Harry: wait hold on im gonna make a gc with mione
Ron: gc?
Harry: groupchat
Harry: so we can all talk at once
Ron: 👍
Harry: god you text like a grown man 😭
—-
New Chat
Harry made a group
Harry added Mione and Ron
Harry changed the group name to “Golden Trio”
(Only you can see this name)
Mione: wait I completely forgot to make a gc
Mione: thanks, harry
Harry: ofc
Ron: ofc??
Harry: of course
Mione: of course
Ron: oh right that makes sense
Harry: we’re gonna have to teach you how to use your phone arent we
Ron: probably
Mione: it’ll be easier when we get to see each other
Mione: see how much you can figure out until then
Ron: i’ll try
Ron: anyway mate, how are the dursleys?
Harry: mione already asked
Harry: they’re fine, about the same as normal
Ron: normal like they ignore you or normal like they treat you like a house elf?
Harry: ignore me
Ron: well thats good ish
Mione: let us know if you need anything harry
Mione: please
Harry: i will
Ron: good
—--
Aunt Petunia
Aunt Petunia: Come make dinner for Dudleykins.
Aunt Petunia: Vernon and I are going out for dinner, don't be a nuisance.
Harry: Yes, Aunt Petunia
—--
Big D
Harry: what do you want for dinner?
Big D: ??
Harry: im cooking, wdyw?
Big D: those like roll things with the pork that you make
Harry: flautas?
Big D: sure
Big D: are you gonna make pudding?
Harry: idk
Harry: your parents are going out for dinner so idk if they would let me
Big D: if i can convince them, would you show me how you make those pattern cakes?
Harry: you wanna learn how to cook??
Big D: 🤷
Harry: yeah sure
Big D liked a message
—--
Golden Trio
Harry: dudley just asked me to teach him how to bake smth
Harry: i think we’re bonding??
Mione: oh harry!
Mione: that’s wonderful!
Ron: is smth something?
Ron: and anyways thats good
Ron: i think
Harry replied to “is smth something”: yes
Harry: and it is actually pretty good
Harry: turns out when dudley isn’t trying to beat me he’s actually decent
Ron: i cant tell if you mean that or not
Harry: lmaoo im being serious
Ron: what could that POSSIBLY mean
Harry: lmao?
Ron: yes
Harry: it mean laughing my ass off
Harry: so like smths really funny
Ron: muggle phrases are so weird
Mione: we could say the same about wizard phrases
Mione: like saying ‘merlin’s beard’ it’s so odd
Harry: well i mean we do say jesus christ so its kind of the same
Ron: who is jesus christ??
Harry: oh shit
Mione:...
Mione: i think that’s something you should google, ron
Ron: google??
Harry: oh god
Ron: im so lost 😖
Harry: ew NEVER use that again
Ron: why not??
Ron: it showed up for confused
Harry: pls just dont 🙏
Ron: fine whatever
—-
Big D
Big D: mum said as long as you clean up its okay if we make dessert
Harry: really?
Harry: hell yeah
Big D: so you’ll show me how to make them?
Harry: uhhhh do you mean like battenburg cakes?
Big D: oh yeah those
Harry: they’re kind of hard to make, maybe we could do smth easier first?
Harry: like brownies or biscuits?
Big D: brownies sound good
Harry: okay cool, i’ll make sure we have everything and if we don’t i’ll run to the shops after your parents leave
Big D: okay cool
Big D: thank you
Harry: no problem
—
Golden Trio
Harry sent an attachment
Harry: we made brownies
Harry: dudley broke a measuring cup and uncle vernon is absolutely going to be pissed but im so joyous rn i dont care
Mione: those look really good harry!
Ron: wait give me one
Ron: i wish you would cook more often
Ron: your food is always so good
Harry: thanks
Harry: i used to get beat if it wasnt good
Ron: okay well
Ron: now i feel bad
Harry: lmaooo my bad
Mione: harry.
Mione: don’t joke about that
Harry: my bad im sorry
Ron: wait what does rn mean?
Mione: right now
Harry: google is free btw
Ron: i still dont know what that is
Mione: omg ron its a search engine
Ron: the thing in cars??
Harry: we’ll just show you when we hang out 🙏
Mione: speaking of which actually
Mione: Harry, are you able to go to the burrow for the last two weeks of summer?
Mione: i’m getting there on august 18th
Harry: i should be able to??
Harry: js depends on my aunt and uncle really
Ron: we can always come pick you up if you need
Harry: right because that went well last time
Mione: WE could pick you up, harry
Harry: lmaooo thanks mione
Harry: okay i gtg ttyl
Ron: what
Harry: i got to go talk to you later 🙏
Ron: ohhh ok bye harry
Mione: bye harry!
—
I’m Here Too
Aunt Petunia: We’re headed home Dudleykins ❣️
Aunt Petunia: We brought you back a few biscuits sweetums!
Vernon: The kitchen better be spotless when we get home, boy.
Big D: thanks mum
Harry: Yes, Uncle Vernon
—
Big D
Big D: thanks again
Big D: i had fun
Harry: i did too
Harry: if you ever have more questions cooking or even magic just lmk
Big D: you’d tell me stuff about magic?
Harry: mhm
Harry: honestly it’s be nice to talk to anyone abt it
Big D: makes sense
Big D: can you tell me what happened last summer again?
Big D: like what actually happened
Harry: dementors
Harry: they’re the guards of a the wizard prison, azkahban, for the worst criminals
Harry: they can suck the soul out of someone if they kiss them and just being around them makes someone feel intense depression, like they’ll never be happy again
Big D: what was the thing you did to get rid of them?
Harry: the patronus charm
Harry: it’s a spell that uses all your happiest memories to overpower the darkness of the dementor
Harry: everyone’s patronus produces as a different animal, mine’s a stag
Big D: does the animal mean smth?
Big D: like in general?
Harry: it supposedly represents someone’s true self
Harry: though i think mine’s a stag because of my dad
Big D: wdym?
Harry: my dad was this thing called an animagus, he could turn into an animal
Harry: his animagus form was a stag
Big D: wait thats really cool
Big D: ca you do that?
Harry: no, it’s a lot of work and takes a long time to do
Harry: and it’s also illegal for people under 17
Big D: oh well
Big D: still cool
Harry: ikr
Big D: what do you learn at wizard school?
Delivered
Big D: hello?
Big D: harry?
Delivered
Big D: what was that?
Big D: Harry??
Harry: nothing dudley
Harry: your dad wasn’t thrilled to find that broken glass
Big D: but i broke it??
Harry: he doesnt care
Big D: what did he do?
Harry: just yelled its fine
Big D: i heard something break
Big D: dont lie
Harry: fine
Harry: he threw the rest of the cup at me
Big D: hello??
Big D: do you need like a plaster??
Harry: no
Big D: are you hurt?
Harry: why do you care
Big D: because
Big D: are you hurt?
Harry: no im fine
Harry: drop it
Big D: fine
—-
Airbuds
Harry ⚡: Now Listening
🎵 Child Psychology-Black Box Recorder🎵
Hermione 📚: Now Listening
🎵 My Angel-Adrianne Lenker 🎵
—-
Golden Trio
Harry: RON
Harry: RON
Ron: WHAT
Harry: you should get airbuds
Ron: what’s that??
Harry: it’s an app where you can see what music ppl are listening to
Mione: here, ron, I’ll send you a link for it
Mione sent a link
Ron: it asked what music provider i use??
Ron: what does that mean??
Harry: okay wait download spotify and ill add you to my family plan
Ron: okay??
Ron: whatever that means
Mione: it’s a way for multiple people to have an account but only one person pays
Mione: I’m on harry’s as well
Ron: oh makes sense
Harry sent a link
Harry: join this ron
Harry: then you should be able to set up airbuds
Ron: what music do i put??
Ron: i dont listen to muggle music
Harry: do you remember the song mione did for that one quidditch game?
Harry: the we will rock you one?
Ron: oh yeah!
Ron: i liked that
Harry: okay put on queen and listen to a few of their songs
Ron: on it 🫡
Harry: i’m so proud of you 🙏
Mione: honestly 🙄
—-
Airbuds
Ron: Now Listening
🎵 Under Pressure-Remastered 2011 Queen, David Bowie 🎵
Harry ⚡: Now Listening
🎵 Starman-David Bowie 🎵
Hermione 📚: Now Listening
🎵Paul-Big Thief🎵
—
Golden Trio
Ron: did i do it right??
Harry: yep
Mione: maybe work on your profile a bit more but you did it!
Ron: I ALSO FIGURED OUT GOOGLE
Ron: if i click the little plus when i click the colorful circle it open up google and i can look things up
Ron: its like hermione is in my phone and answering my questions but without the attitude
Mione: I will beat your ass.
Ron: I apologize
Harry: 😭
—-
Mione
Harry: do you think you could pick me up earlier than the 18th?
Harry: i can’t stand this fucking house
Mione: i’ll ask my parents but i’m sure we can
Mione: did something happen?
Harry: vernon got pissed about the broken glass even though it didn’t even break it
Mione: what did he do?
Harry: just yelled and locked me in my room
Mione: really?
Mione: that’s all?
Harry: that’s all.
Mione: mhm
Harry:...
Harry: can we call?
Mione: oh harry
Mione: of course
Incoming call from Mione
“Harry?”
“Hi, Mione.”
“Are you okay?”
“I’m not on my death bed or anything.”
“What did your uncle do?”
“Yelled and threw some glass at me.”
“Did you get hurt?”
“It nicked me a little but it’s not that bad.”
“It doesn’t matter how bad it is, you shouldn’t be hurt at all. Can you clean and wrap it?”
“I did already, but I think some glass got stuck in the cut because it hurts more than normal.”
“Jesus, Harry.”
“And I used the last of my plasters and wrappings so if I take it off them I can’t rewrap it.”
“I think it’s better to get the glass out of the wound, even if that means it’ll be unwrapped. I mean, you managed decently with the cuts from Umbridge.”
“God, I hated that woman. You’re right, though. Thanks, Mione.”
“What’s the earliest day you could be picked up?”
“Probably next Sunday?”
“I’ll see you then.”
“Are you sure? It’s like two weeks earlier than you had planned and I don’t wanna be a bother to your parents.”
“You’re not a bother, Harry. My mum and dad love you. And besides, it just means we get to hang out more!”
“I guess. Thanks, Mione. I love you.”
“I love you too, Harry. Please be careful and take care of yourself, I’ll see you next Sunday.”
“See you Sunday.”
—--
Aunt Petunia
Harry: Aunt Petunia, my friend is going to come pick me up next Sunday. If there’s anything you would like me to get done, please let me know
Aunt Petunia liked a message
—
Unknown Number
Unknown: Potter.
Harry: uhh maybe?
Harry: who is this?
Unknown: Malfoy.
Harry: hello???
Harry: like draco malfoy??
Unknown: Obviously, you idiot.
Harry created a new contact
Harry: how the actual fuck did you get my number??
Malfoy??: My father.
Harry: right ofc
Harry: okay follow up question
Harry: why are you texting me??
Malfoy??: Because I can’t figure out how to work this stupid muggle device.
Malfoy??: And I refuse to write Granger for any form of help.
Harry: so i was the next best option??
Malfoy??: Obviously.
Harry: the hell do you expect me to do in this situation??
Malfoy??: Explain how to use this.
Harry: right well like what do you need explained??
Malfoy??: My father said that this could produce music from it like a record player.
Harry: oh yeah you need like an app
Harry: download spotify
Malfoy??: How?
Harry: open the play store or wtv you have and search spotify
Malfoy??: What store?
Harry: jesus christ
Harry: if you find a little icon that’s colorful and has like a play button on it, it should say play store. After that click the search bar and type in spotify and download it
Malfoy??: The green circle with lines?
Harry: yeah thats spotify
Harry: it’s a music app that has pretty much every song
Harry: though i actually dont think it had wizard music
Malfoy??: Then what is the point?
Harry: well it had muggle music
Harry: which I arguably thing is better than wizard music
Malfoy??: There is no way.
Harry: deadass
Harry: do you want me to give you recommendations?
Malfoy??: I suppose.
Harry: do you want music I like or like popular music?
Malfoy??: Whichever.
Harry: okay here i’ll send you a few playlists
Malfoy??: Playlist?
Harry: its like a collection of songs that you can play
Harry sent two links
Harry: the first one is songs i like and the second one is popular songs
Malfoy??: Hmm. Interesting.
Harry: right, we done then?
Malfoy??: For now.
Harry: god you text like my uncle 😭
Malfoy?? disliked a message
—
Golden Trio
Harry sent four attachments
Harry: so apparently malfoy has decided that i’m his muggle expert 🙏
Ron: bloody hell
Ron: you should’ve just ignored him
Mione: actually he seems to be acting pretty civil
Mione: especially for malfoy
Harry: thats what I thought
Harry: idk if he’s gonna text me again so we’ll see 😭
Mione: for some reason I get the feeling you wouldn’t mind him texting you again…
Harry: SHHHH
Harry: no idea what you’re taking about
Ron: wait huh?
Harry: NOTHING
Harry: anyways mione is picking me up next sunday so is it okay if we’re at the burrow a few weeks earlier?
Ron: i mean yeah ofc
Harry: ABBREVIATION
Harry: IM SO PROUD
Ron: thanks mate 😭
Harry loved a message
Mione: you know EXACTLY what I meant harry
Mione: don’t be daft
Harry: mione im begging you to shut up
Mione: fine
Ron: harry what is she talking about
Harry: absolutely nothing idk what you mean
Ron: harry tell me
Harry: UGHHHH
Harry: fine
Harry: i may or may not have like the tiniest smallest crush on him
Ron: ON MALFOY???
Ron: HES A PRAT
Harry: I KNOW AND THATS WHY IT SUCKS
Harry: I LOOK AND FEEL LIKE FUCKING IDIOT FOR LIKING HIM
Ron: like you’re not even friends??
Harry: I KNOW RON
Ron: i mean at least he’s gotten a bit better from previous years
Harry: EXACTLY
Harry: i actually can’t believe youre the one who agrees with me
Ron: Huh?
Harry: when mione found out she freaked and kept going on about how awful he was and the fact he’s from this super strict pureblood family
Mione: I was just worried, harry
Mione: his family has very conservative vibes and i dont want you to get hurt
Harry loved a message
Harry: they really do, dont they?
Harry: and ik mione and I appreciate it
Harry: trust me, im not the most thrilled about it either
Ron: wait what does conservative mean?
Mione: the muggle meaning is very religious and traditional, usually real asshole people
Harry: my aunt and uncle are conservative
Harry: well kind of
Harry: they don’t go to church but they’re full of hate and rage so its close enough
Ron: ik muggles aren’t traditional with blood purity so what is traditional for muggles?
Harry: uhhhh well
Harry: there’s different layers to it
Harry: so there’s blood purity for wizards
Harry: for muggles it’s more like skin purity??
Harry: if that makes sense
Mione: there are some muggle people who believe that people with white skin are superior to people with darker skin
Mione: so to these people, you, ron, would be seen as superior to me or harry simply because you’re white and we’re not
Harry: and thats only like one of the things
Harry: like there’s a lot of people who think if you don’t believe in god then you suck and are going to suffer forever
Harry: and ppl who think that marriage and relationships are only between a man and a woman
Ron: wdym?
Harry: ABBREVIATION
Harry: but like my aunt and uncle, for example, think that if two men got together that it would be wrong and disgusting
Mione: so essentially, while wizards care a whole lot about people’s blood status, muggles care about literally EVERYTHING you are/do
Ron: merlin’s beard
Ron: thats awful
Harry: wait until you hear about WW2
Ron:??
Mione: world war two
Mione: the second war that lots of different countries participated in
Harry: about 85 million people died
Harry: the main cause of the war was this guy named hitler who believed that jewish people were inferior and needed to die simply because of their religion
Ron: dont you guys call you know who wizard hitler?
Harry: LMAOOOO YEAH
Mione: he is basically wizard hitler
Mione: look up hitler and what he did and you’ll see what we mean
Ron: bloody hell
Ron: you know who IS wizard hitler
Harry: LMAOOOO