Chapter Text
"Scott, calm down."
"I can't, Stiles. I think I'm going to have panic attack. Och my god, Stiles, I can't do this. I definatly can't do this!"
"Dude, it's just a date. You were before on a dates."
"But not with Isaac! It's going to be our first date. What if I tell something wrong? What if I offend him?"
Stiles rolled his eyes and closed door behind him. With cellphone near his ear and canstantly bitching Scott on the other side, he went to kitchen to get some juice. It was already late night so he was forced to lit the lights.
"Scottie" he interrupted his best friend. "You can do this. Isaac likes you. And you like him. You're both stupidly cute, so you are probably going to spend your date stammering and talking in the same time. But it's good. It means that you match each other. I guess. I-I don't know."
"You're not comforting me" Scott moaned. "I swear, if our date won't work and betwen us is going to be awkward and Isaac will leave - again - I'm going to throw all fault at you. Because it is your fault. You persuaded me ask him out."
"Scottie, you are insulting me by this statement. If I could, I would slap you. But I can't beacuse it would be animal abuse."
"Stiles..."
"I love you too! And now I'm going to hung up, drink my juice in peace and go to sleep because I'm exausted by listening your bitching all day long . Go to Isaac. Kiss him or something. You can give me statement tommorow morning. Good bye."
The boy hunged up ignoring Scott's protesting. He sighed deeply and drank rest of the juice. Empty bootle threw into rubbish bin, turned off the lights in the kitchen and started climbing to his room. This night he was supposed to spend with his father watching some game on the TV, but Sheriff got call from the station and couldn't be here.
So Stiles was going to take long, hot bath because he manage to not being rude and sarcastic to anyone - well, except Scott, but that's Scott, so that doesn't count - and he was going to go to bed. And then sleep for many, many hours.
Teenager entered his room and lit lights and--
"Stiles."
The boy screamed and jumped frightened. He turned and saw Derek standing near commode.
"What the--!"
"I need to speak with you" said werewolf taking one step closer. Stiles pressed hend on his chest, feeling his racing heart.
"You could call! Like a normal person! Or at least knock on the front door. Do you wanna give me a heart attack?! I though i was going to die! I don't want to die, okey? If I would I would climb on your ego and jumped off on your IQ."
"Stiles" growled Derek.
"No! Don't you dare growl at me! I'm sick of this. You can't sneak into my room and then scare me! That's not how it's work, you big idiot. By the way, I'm not affraid of you."
In the spleat of second Derek was right in front of Stiles, grabed his shirt and pressed him against wall. He frowned and locked jaw.
"O-okey. Maybe I am. A little bit. Very, very little bit. But that's not my fault that you are so big and scary" Stiles blurted. He swallowed and started breathing normally again. "What do you want, Derek? What are you doing here?"
Werewolf loosened his grip at Stiles' shirt, but didn't back off. Stilinski felt his hot body and breath on him. He licked his lips, not for the first time wondering if Derek is rough in bed. Yeah. Stiles Stilinski had multiple times daydreamed about this werewolf. Duh! He also masturbate to thought of this big dumbass.
"I already told you. I need to speak with you."
"Then speak. Tell me what's on your soul, which - by the way - you don't have beacuse you're to big id--"
Stiles didn't get the chance end his sentence. Derek suddenly grabed his face with both hands and smacked their lips together. The boy was in shock, so for the first three seconds he did nothing. Besides wondering if that was real. But he was going with it even if it was dream or one of his fantasies or some other shit. Because - c'mone people - he's not getting kissed by hot people like Derek. Or kissed at all.
So he kissed back. He grabed Derek's sides and leaned closer to him. Werewolf, as if he only waited for this, deepend the kiss. Room was filled with sounds of licking, sucking, biting and moaning. Derek had tongue deep down Stiles throat and because of that young boy felt how his knees are going soft. Were had to catch him before he fell.
Stilinski broke their embrance gasping or air. One look at Derek and he was sure that werewolf couldn't belief in what they just did.
"Do-do you still wanna talk or maybe you prefer... do something diffrent?" asked Stiles. He bit inside of his cheek waiting for the answer.
Derek for a moment studied him with a steady look. Stiles felt how his face is red with embarrassment and excitement.
"Are you sure?" whispered werewolf.
Stiles noded and mumbled something like 'oh God, yes, definitely yes' and then kissed Derek. Before he could think about anything, he was already lying down on his bed with hot body on top of him. They were still kissing as they started taking off their clothes. Derek's body was hot as never. Stiles couldn't stop himself from inhaling his scent.
It was like a dream. Stiles still couldn't belefie that Derek is actually here in his room, kissing and touching him all. He had to admit; sometimes he had a feeling that Derek wants to jump on him in THAT way, but teenager always told himself that it was only his sick imagination. And yet here they were.
Stiles wanted to start giggle hysterically. He didn't do it, though, because suddenly werewolf went lower and wraped hand around his dick.
It was the first time when someone other then himself was touching his cock. It was good feeling. Really, really good.
Stiles watched Derek as the man moved his hand up and down. He smeared precome over the cockhead and then leaned and kissed the tip. Through Stiles' body went shiver. He bit his bottom lip trying not to moan too loud. Thankfully there wasn't anybody else in house. But even if, boy didn't want to be too loud. Derek on the other hand looked like he wanted to make Stiles moan and scream as loud as teenager could.
He wraped hand on the base of boy's cock and licked his lenght. He grinned looking up at Stiles. Later, as if he wanted to mock younger man, he was still looking at Stiles when he took his lenght into his mouth. Teenager moaned loudly. He grabed sheets and his knuckles went white. He wanted to look at Derek when he was blowing him but he couldn't make himself to open his eyes. It was too good. He threw his head back and inhale sharply. He could feel hot mouth around him. Few times he also felt Derek's too long front teath. They were scraping his sensitive skin but it didn't hurt. In fact, Stiles liked it a lot.
Derek still had his mouth wraped around his dick when Stiles felt fingers touching his hole. He moaned and grabed werewolf by his hair. He was about to explode. He was so close...
"Derek... oh god... Derek, I'm going to - uh - explode" Stiles blurted.
Werewolf pulled off and squeezed base of his cock. Teenager moaned disappointed.
"Not yet" said man. He shifted his body on bed and lifted Stiles's ass and slided inside him earlier licked finger.
Derek knelt down and leaned over the boy. Still moving his finger he started kissing him. Stiles wraped his arms around him and gave a kiss back with all force he had. He could feel his precome on Derek's tongue.
After some time he was getting impatient. He already had four fingers inside him. He knew he was still tigh but he needed something diffrent inside him. And he couldn't wait any longer. He wanted him here and now. Rough and strong even with some pain.
He needed him.
"Derek" Stiles panted. "I can't wait any longer."
Werewolf bit his bottom lip. He pulled off his finger and tiped over Stiles that the boy was lying down on his stomach. Stiles pressed his face into his pillow. When he felt how Derek was getting inside him, he held his breath.
It hurted. Obviously. But in the same time it was so incredible pleasurable that Stiles wanted to cry. He couldn't belevie. It was really happening. He lost his v-card. With Derek. A man, a werewolf that he was in love with.
Yes. Stiles Stilinski loved Derek for some quite long time. He had no idea when that happened. One day he just had this thought that Derek is amazing man and that he loves him. There was no shock or panic. No. That thought was... natural. He never told anyone about his feelings. He hadn't even have time for this. With all this stuff with Nemeton, Nogitsune and other shit. In fact, there was no place for his feelings on the inside world. So he kept all of this to himself.
After Derek make sure that Stiles get used to felling being filled he started moving. Short, slowly movements as he droped light kisses on Stiles' back and shoulders and neck. When teenager started moving his hips, Derek changed the pace, going deeper and rougher. Stiles was shivering and moaning like a high class porn star. He felt so fucking full and so good that he though he might pass out from pleasure.
Stiles practically cried, whimpered and screamed into pillow everytime when Derek hit his prostate. Hale was quiet though. Only sometimes from his mouth escaped a low growls or stifled moans. And some swearing. It turned out that Stiles was the loud one in bed.
Sex was amazing, really. It was a lot better than Stiles imagined. And he did it a hundred of times.
But everything has to end. Derek was the one who came first. He pressed forehead to Stiles' shoulder, made a quiet rumbled noise and spilled in the teenager. Stiles felt hot semen inside him and came as well.
"Oh, god, Derek" he sobbed. "Fuck-- I love you-- I-- love you so much-- fuck"
Werewolf stiffened. Stiles was still panting and recovering from his orgasm. He didn't notice Derek's reaction to confession until he violently pulled off and stood up. Only then teenager realized that he said 'I love you' out loud. Fuck.
He panicked and sat up on bed.
Stiles was looking at Derek with wide eyes and racing heart. He couldn't belevie that he actually said that. Dammit.
"Derek..."
"It was mistake" werewolf growled.
"I'm sorry. I just-- I'm sorry, Derek."
Teenager was looking at man who quickly dressed. He bit his bottom lip. When Derek was finally dressed and started going to door, Stiles spoke up.
"Wait. We're not even going to talk about it?"
Derek stoped. For few long seconds nothing happened. Then werewolf turned to Stiles and looked him deadly in the eyes.
"Some thing are better left unspoken, Stiles" Derek said coldly.
After that he left teenager alone.
*
Stiles cried with quiet tears. He was sitting crouched in bathtub with empty eyes looking at wall in front of him. Derek left after he said that Stiles do bad telling him that he love him. And Stiles knew that he shouldn't say anything. Fuck, he was so fucking furious at himself. If he could, he would go back in the time and never said that. Or even better: he would never go to bed with Derek fucking Hale.
Teenager wanted to forget about that night. About Derek and his touch. He scrubbed his skin until it became red. As if it would help. He still felt werewolf inside him. And that was the worst part.
He cried while bathing lond and precisely inside and outside. He was shivering all the time.
Stiles wanted to call Scott. He wanted his best friend to come and comfort him. But he didn't want to destroy his night with Isaac. So he cried all alone, crouched in the bathroom floor because he couldn't force himself to go back to his bedroom. When the sun went up and his tears finally stopped he fell asleep completly exhausted.
*
Teenager avoided his father and Scott for three days in a row. He sat in his room (which was now super clean) behind closed door. Didn't cry. He was too tired for this. Instead he tormented himself by thousand diffrent thoughts about how he fucked up. He could have something with Derek - even if that would be just sex - but he screwed up by saying 'I love you'. Stiles was mad as hell at his no brain-to-mouth filter. He was furious at himself. But also at Derek. Because he could at least stay and talk about this. But no! Derek ran away, leaving Stiles all alone.
After those three days, Scott finally break down doors to his room. He saw Stiles for the first time in three days and he wasn't happy with what he saw; Stiles sitting on bed, wearing old, worn out pajamas. Teenager was pale and had dark circles under eyes. Room smelt with sadness, distress and rage. There was also something else but Scott couldn't recognised it.
"Dude, what the hell?" he asked looking at his best friend.
Stiles started nervously play with his fingers. No, thought suddenly Scott. He's counting them. Like he was checking if it was real.
"I slept with Derek" Stiles said after long moment.
Scott was shocked. Truly, completly shocked. He didn't know how to answer but then his mind overlap a scary thought. Seeing state which was Stiles in, he asked quietly:
"Did... Did he force himself on you?"
"No, Scott. Derek didn't force me to anything."
"Then why are like... that?"
The boy looked away for few second before answering.
"Because I said him that I love him. And he... he... He said that some things are better left unspoke. He left me after those words."
Scott felt the surge of anger. Derek hurted his best friend. His pack mate. Brother. He was so angry... so devastated by Stiles' state... The only thing he could think was that he's gonna kill Derek as soon as he lay his eyes on him.
"I shouldn't say that to him" whispered Stiles. "I shouldn't slept with him. This is all my fault."
"No" growled Scott in response. Stiles looked at him. "This isn't your fault. None of this. You just said what you feel. It's normal. What isn't normal is abonding someone after love confession, Stiles. Derek is at fault here. And I swear I'm gonna kill him as soon as I see him. I swear, Stiles."
"You don't have to do it, Scott."
"But I want to."
"But I don't want you to kill him. Yes, he hurt me. And I am mad at him... but I still love him, Scott. And I don't want you to kill him beacause I still love him" Stiles explained with glassy eyes and breaking voice. "But I don't want to. I don't want to love him anymore. I hate it. Scott, I don't know what to do!"
Tears rolled down his face. Seeing this Scott came closer his best friend, sat right next to him and hugged him. He tried to calm himself, not wanting to let his wolf take over control. He tried to focus on Stiles in his arms, afraid that if he let him go, he would wolf out and run after Derek.
Scott held Stiles close for long time, telling him that everything was going to be okey. They could go through it toghether. He was scared that Stiles could break down completly. He didn't even recover after being posesssed by Nigitsune! And now with Derek... The thought about loosing his best friend feared him.
"You're going to him, right?" asked Stiles after Scott headed to door.
Werewolf stoped and noded.
"I know I said that I don't want you to kill him... but you can hit him. Cauple of times. Hard."
Scott smiled and left.
*
How it turned out, Derek disappeared.
When Scott came to loft, he didn't find Alpha nor his stuff. Everything... disappeared. The only thing left was Derek's smell and stench of his anger. Scott couldn't belevie that Derek ran away.
After Stiles found out about Derek disappearing, everything seemed lifeless. He looked at Scott with empty eyes for a long time and then he stated that he want to be alone. Scott left him, but he didn't leave his house. He sat in the kitchen and listened Stiles heart beat. He was too afraid that the boy will do something stupid.
Scott that night explain this situation to rest of the pack. He thought that he shouldn't, maybe Stiles didn't want rest to know. But then werewolf reminded himself that Stiles needed help. And Scott couldn't help all by himself. So he called everyone to Stilinskis house and told everything.
Isaac, Lydia, Kira, Malia... Everyone was in shock. They were also angry. Nothing weird.
Sheriff wasn't at home. Good, because he would probably suspect something - supposing he already hasn't - and Scott knew that Stiles certainly didn't want his father to know about what happened. At least for now.
They were sitting in Stilinskis kitchen talking about diffrent way to catch Derek when Stiles came down the stairs. He appeared in the doorway barefoot, with abnormally hanging on clothes, even more darker circles under red and puffy eyes and with sunken cheeks. He probably hasn't eat in days. Everyone in the room stood up, lookind and him with worrying expresion. Lydia was the one who came to him first. She gather him in strong embrance. After her came Kira and then everyone. They stood toghether in one big hug for some time, each one of them felt how Stiles trembled. Boy seemed smaller than usually.
None of them liked state in which was their friend.
Each one of them planned their own revenge on Derek.
*
Stiles somehow began to recover after a month. At least mentally. Physically, however ... it was getting worse. His head and stomach hurt as hell. He threw up all the time and he couldn't eat despite huge hunger. Scott and Sheriff tried drag him to the hospital, but Stiles categorically refused to visit this place. He even refused to being examinate by Melissa.
He tried to forget about Derek. He helped his father with cases, learned, read books, watched films and played games. Stiles tried to clog his mint with everything as long as it wasn't Derek. Sometimes he succeeded, sometimes not. But he tried.
Scott managed to convince Stiles for at least appointment with Deaton after boy collapsed. Twice the same day.
Deaton qietly linstened Scott's and Stiles' explanations. When they had finished, the man began to look for something in the cabinets. Stiles watched him, nervously playing with his fingers.
"Eat it, please" Deaton said, givind Stiles piece of... something. Teenager had no idea what it was. It looked like small, mat, black rock. "Come on, Stiles."
With a grimace teenager showed it to his mouth. As it turned out, when it touched his tongue, it became spft, somehow similar to jelly.It was sweet and suprisingly good.
"How does it taste?" asked Deaton.
"Sweet. Very good. What is it?"
The man furrowed his eyebrows slightly, while observing Stiles. After a moment of silence he asked:
"Stiles, had something happened between you and a werewolf, maybe?"
Boy stiffened. He looked over to Scott who had his eyes wide open.
"You mean..."
"An sexual intercourse. Answer honestly, Stiles, I have to know the truth."
Stiles clenched his jaw and swallowed. He nodded.
"With who?"
"Derek."
Deaton nodded and turned around to search something once again.
"So?" asked Scoot impatiently.
"Unfortunately, I know" Deaton said and turned around. He put in front of Stiles two small vials filled with some white pills. Vet looked him straight in the eye.
"Um, you know that we can't read your mind, right?" murmured Stiles. "You have to tell us out loud."
Deaton sighed and cleared his throat.
"You're pregnant, Stiles."