Chapter Text
the air in busan smelled like salt, rain, and old memories.
for kim taehyung, it also smelled faintly of failure.
not the loud kind.
the quiet kind that lingered in expensive sweaters and unpacked boxes—the kind that followed him all the way home from paris.
the grocery store near the harbor hadn’t changed much since he left. the fluorescent lights still buzzed softly overhead. the old cashier near the front still hummed trot songs under her breath. even the aisles looked painfully familiar.
only taehyung felt different.
he officially moved back to town two weeks ago.
he moved through the store with a quiet elegance that drew attention without trying.
platinum blonde curls framed his soft face in messy waves, bouncing lightly whenever he turned his head quickly.
a silky cream long-sleeved top slipped lazily off one shoulder, exposing the elegant script tattoo winding along his collarbone.
french poetry.
unreadable to almost everyone here.
it was beautiful. he was beautiful.
tiny gold hoops caught the light while he reached for a bag of flour, hazel eyes scanning the shelf absentmindedly.
busan remembered him as the pretty boy who used to skateboard recklessly to the library and fall asleep during church picnics.
the town didn’t know the version of kim taehyung who spent five years in europe teaching art, speaking french over candlelit dinners, and crying silently in a paris penthouse after a man returned an engagement ring with tired eyes and an apology that arrived too late.
taehyung exhaled quietly and adjusted the grocery basket on his hip.
suddenly, a shadow fell over him.
a presence.
warm.
large.
dangerous—and smelling faintly of expensive leather, smoke, and something metallic.
“need some help with that?”
the voice slid down taehyung’s spine like slow lightning.
deep.
like rough velvet.
familiar in a way that made his chest tighten instantly.
taehyung turned too quickly.
the flour slipped from his fingers, but it never hit the floor.
a tattooed hand caught it midair effortlessly.
taehyung’s breath caught.
standing in front of him was a man sculpted from dark marble and familiarity.
tall enough to tower over him now.
broad shoulders stretching beneath a black leather jacket.
raven-black hair falling over sharp brows.
silver rings glinting in pierced ears and lower lip.
a silver chain flashed briefly against his tan skin.
and those eyes.
those molten brown eyes.
heavy and searching and fixed entirely on taehyung.
predatory wasn’t the right word.
predators hunted because they were hungry.
this looked worse.
this looked like recognition.
“jungkook?” taehyung whispered.
the man’s mouth curved slowly.
dangerously.
“kookie?”
taehyung nearly dropped the basket too—because jungkook was not supposed to look like that.
in taehyung’s memory, jungkook was all scraped knees and oversized hoodies. sulking in his passengers seat after getting suspended again. falling asleep against taehyung’s shoulder during movies he swore he wasn’t watching.
he was supposed to still look fifteen.
not this.
not broad and devastating and unfairly beautiful standing beside him like trouble had learned perfect posture.
“oh my god,” taehyung breathed.
his tattoos shifted beneath his skin with every movement. dark ink winding down his neck and disappearing beneath his sleeves.
taehyung stared before he could stop himself.
jungkook noticed.
of course he noticed.
his gaze flickered down taehyung too.
soft cream silk top.
loose beige trousers.
tiny gold earrings.
platinum curls brushing his forehead in messy waves.
hazel eyes still impossibly pretty—and there it was.
that same feeling jungkook remembered from years ago.
the strange, painful tightness beneath his ribs whenever taehyung looked too beautiful under ordinary lighting.
only now it was worse.
now he was old enough to understand what it meant.
“kookie?” taehyung said weakly.
jungkook almost smiled at the nickname.
almost.
“you got so big,” taehyung blurted.
the silence afterward felt catastrophic, because jungkook’s eyes darkened instantly.
taehyung realized what he’d said exactly three seconds too late.
jungkook stepped closer.
close enough for taehyung to smell cedarwood and smoke beneath the summer air.
“did I?” jungkook asked softly.
taehyung’s face burst into heat.
there it was.
the voice.
that deep voice.
not the rough teenage crack taehyung remembered hearing scream through the jeon household at two in the morning because jungkook lost another video game.
this voice wrapped around words slowly.
taehyung blinked too fast.
‘oh,’ he said internally, horrified.
that is a man.
a whole man.
jungkook bent to pick up a fallen orange before handing it back.
their fingers brushed.
taehyung nearly combusted on impact.
jungkook noticed that too.
his eyes sharpened with terrifying precision.
“you back for good?” he rasped.
taehyung nodded quickly. “I got hired at the kindergarten near the river.”
“you teach kids now.”
“mhm.”
jungkook stared at him for a long moment.
“you always were good at taking care of people.”
something about the way he said it made taehyung’s stomach twist.
like the words meant more than they should.
a cough sounded nearby—and the spell broke.
taehyung adjusted his shirt awkwardly. “your mother told me you were abroad.”
“was.”
“and now?”
“now i’m here.”
taehyung swallowed.
“well,” he laughed nervously, “it’s really good seeing you again, kookie.”
jungkook’s eyes flickered at the nickname this time.
something dark and unbearably pleased moved beneath his expression.
he stepped forward before taehyung could retreat.
too close.
way too close.
taehyung’s heart started behaving like a trapped animal.
“you still call me kookie?” jungkook asked quietly.
taehyung opened his mouth then closed it, because suddenly the nickname felt way too dangerous.
jungkook watched every flicker of uncertainty across his face.
he leaned down slightly.
just enough to hear him better.
that tiny movement nearly ruined taehyung completely.
“I…” taehyung cleared his throat. “that’s what i've always called you.”
jungkook held his gaze.
“yeah,” he murmured. “you did.”
and somehow those three words carried years inside them.
years of bruised knuckles.
late nights.
sticky notes left in his room.
the smell of antiseptic in taehyung’s bedroom while he patched jungkook’s split lip with gentle hands.
taehyung never understood what he’d done to him, but jungkook remembered everything.
every touch.
every kindness.
every single time taehyung looked at him like he wasn’t difficult to love.
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
flashback
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
at sixteen, jungkook had blood on his mouth and gravel embedded in his palms.
again.
mrs. jeon had yelled herself hoarse downstairs after the school called.
again.
another fight.
another suspension.
another problem.
jungkook sat on the edge of his bed with headphones around his neck and fury boiling beneath his skin while rain battered the windows outside.
then there was a soft knock at his bedroom door.
taehyung peeked inside carefully.
“can I come in?”
jungkook shrugged.
taehyung entered carrying a first aid kit and two juice boxes.
jungkook stared at the juice boxes suspiciously.
taehyung plopped down beside him.
“you know,” he sighed dramatically, “normal people ice their injuries after said injury.”
“m’ fine.”
“you’re bleeding out on your comforter.”
jungkook glanced down.
“.. oh.”
taehyung laughed softly.
it was a pretty sound.
warm.
jungkook pretended not to listen too closely.
taehyung gently tilted jungkook’s chin toward the light.
“who was it this time?”
“some asshole.”
“and?”
“he started it.”
“you always say that.”
“because they always do.”
taehyung dabbed antiseptic against jungkook’s split lip.
jungkook hissed.
“hold still, baby,” taehyung murmured absentmindedly.
jungkook froze.
taehyung didn’t seem to notice, but jungkook did.
baby.
the word wrapped around something fragile inside him.
nobody called him soft things.
noone except taehyung.
“you can’t keep fighting people every week,” taehyung said quietly.
jungkook stared at his hands.
“they do stupid stuff.”
“like what?”
jungkook shrugged, his jaw tightened.
taehyung studied him for a moment before sighing softly.
“they said something about your dad again?”
silence.
taehyung’s expression softened instantly.
jungkook hated that look.
taehyung brushed damp curls off jungkook’s forehead.
“you’re not responsible for the things adults do,” he said gently.
jungkook swallowed hard.
he remembered that touch for years.
just warm fingers against his forehead while rain tapped the windows—but for jungkook, affection had always arrived like natural disasters.
loud, violent, and temporary.
taehyung was the first person who made gentleness feel ordinary, and that ruined jungkook permanently.
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
end of flashback
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
three weeks after the grocery store encounter, taehyung made the catastrophic mistake of attending a jeon family barbecue.
he should have known better.
he really should have.
mrs. jeon practically dragged him there herself after church.
“you’ve been hiding in that little house for weeks,” she scolded. “people miss your pretty face.”
taehyung smiled politely while carrying extra food into the backyard.
the second he stepped outside, conversations paused.
apparently word had spread that kim taehyung was back in town, and because taehyung looked unfair—cropped ivory shirt paired with loose light washed jeans, silver necklace glinting at his throat, curls falling into his eyes, tattoos on display.
was pretty enough to make people accidentally forget their sentences.
taehyung ignored the stares with practiced ease.
he saw jungkook leaning against a wall.
black fitted shirt, tattooed arms bare beneath golden evening light, one hand wrapped around a beer bottle, watching taehyung with frightening stillness.
taehyung nearly walked directly into a lawn chair.
mrs. jeon snorted.
“oh, brother,” she muttered.
jungkook pushed away from the patio immediately.
every instinct taehyung possessed screamed at him to flee.
instead he stood frozen while jungkook approached.
“you came.”
taehyung smiled nervously. “your mom threatened me.”
“she tends to do that.”
his voice still did terrible things to taehyung’s nervous system, and jungkook knows it now.
that was the dangerous part.
“you need help with that?” jungkook asked, nodding toward the bags of extra uncooked meat he brought.
“oh, no, I got it.”
jungkook took it from him anyway with effortless ease.
the muscles in his forearms flexed.
taehyung stared.
unfortunately, jungkook caught him staring.
again.
a tiny smirk tugged at his mouth.
“you okay?”
taehyung looked away instantly. “peachy..”
liar.
jungkook placed the bags on the table near the grill before leaning slightly closer.
“your ears turned red.”
taehyung nearly died.
“you were never this mean before.”
“I was fifteen.”
that answer did not help.
at all.
throughout dinner, taehyung became painfully aware of jungkook’s attention.
not casual glances.
not harmless nostalgia.
attention.
heavy and deliberate attention.
like jungkook listened every time taehyung laughed.
like he noticed whenever taehyung tucked his curls behind his ear.
like he tried to remember every expression for later.
taehyung tried focusing on literally anything else.
potato salad.
cobb salad.
cornbread.
barbecue chicken.
cloud formations.
taxes.
nothing worked.
then out of thin air someone mentioned jungkook’s time abroad.
“oh, he was insane over there,” one of his cousins laughed. “always getting into fights.”
mrs. jeon groaned. “don’t remind me, almost had to bail him out of jail twice.”
taehyung looked toward jungkook instinctively.
“you fought?”
jungkook shrugged.
“I guess.”
“you guess?” another cousin barked. “you broke somebody’s nose and arm outside a club.”
taehyung blinked.
jungkook looked entirely unbothered.
“why, kookie?”
the table quieted strangely.
one cousin snorted into his drink.
jungkook’s eyes stayed on taehyung.
“he said something disrespectful.”
“about you?” taehyung asked softly.
“no.”
jungkook took a sip of his beer.
“about you.”
the entire world seemed to stop moving.
taehyung stared at him.
“what?”
“he didn’t know you,” jungkook said simply. “but he talked like he did.”
something electric passed through the air.
taehyung’s heartbeat stumbled.
nobody spoke for a second.
then mrs. jeon loudly demanded more lemonade, saving taehyung from spontaneously dissolving into atoms—but the feeling stayed.
hours later, taehyung escaped into the kitchen for air.
he pressed cold fingers against his temples.
god, what was wrong with him?
why was he reacting like this?
it was jungkook.
his sweet, difficult jungkook who he’d practically helped raised.
the boy who used to climb through his bedroom window because he got locked out by his dad after curfew.
the teenager who once cried silently in taehyung’s car after his father left for the last time.
the kid who used to fit in his lap during thunderstorms when he was ten.
“you know what your problem is?”
taehyung visually startled.
jungkook stood in the arch of the kitchen doorway.
towering over him now.
god, when had he gotten so tall?
“hm?” taehyung managed weakly.
jungkook stepped closer.
“you still think i’m a kid.”
taehyung’s brain completely malfunctioned because jungkook cornering him beside potato salad should not have felt this intense.
yet somehow the kitchen still seemed too warm, and too small.
jungkook braced one tattooed arm against the counter beside taehyung.
not touching him.
worse.
almost touching him.
taehyung’s pulse screamed.
“I don’t think you’re still a kid,” he lied.
jungkook’s eyes darkened immediately.
“liar.”
taehyung swallowed.
jungkook leaned closer.
“do you know what I remember most from high school?”
taehyung shook his head carefully.
“you touching my face.”
the confession landed directly beneath taehyung’s ribs.
“you always fixed me up after fights,” jungkook continued quietly. “you’d get mad and lecture me the whole time.”
taehyung’s voice came out soft. “you scared me.”
“I know.”
“you were reckless.”
“I know.”
jungkook’s gaze dragged slowly across taehyung’s face.
“and you still took care of me anyway.”
taehyung stopped breathing properly, suddenly this did not feel nostalgic anymore.
it felt intimate.
dangerously intimate.
jungkook’s eyes flickered briefly toward taehyung’s mouth before returning upward.
“tell me something honestly,” he said.
taehyung nodded before realizing that was probably a mistake.
“have you really never looked at me differently?”
silence crashed between them.
taehyung’s mind went blank.
because yes.
recently?
absolutely yes.
years ago?
never.
he opened his mouth helplessly.
jungkook watched him carefully.
then, somehow, his expression softened.
“you don’t have to answer.”
taehyung exhaled shakily.
“you're looking at me with the same eyes you used to when I was fifteen. but i’m looking at you, taehyung, and i’m not thinking about skateboards or band-aids."
he leaned down, his nose brushing against the sensitive skin of taehyung’s neck, right over the script tattoo. he inhaled deeply, a low groan vibrating in his throat.
"you smell like vanilla and something expensive," jungkook growled. "it’s driving me out of my mind."
taehyung’s hands, still holding the plates, began to tremble. "jungkook, we're in the kitchen... your mom ..."
completely distracted, jungkook noticed something near taehyung’s lip.
without thinking, he reached out.
thumb brushing gently against the corner of taehyung’s mouth.
taehyung froze.
jungkook held up a tiny smear of whipped cream.
“there,” he murmured.
the touch lasted maybe two seconds.
taehyung thought about it for three straight days afterward.
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
kindergarteners adored taehyung instantly.
it was inevitable.
he dressed like soft poetry and smelled faintly of vanilla hand cream.
within a month, children were clinging to his legs every morning while parents looked half in love with him themselves.
taehyung liked the routine.
the quiet gentleness of it.
construction paper.
tiny shoes squeaking across polished floors.
sticky little hands reaching for his.
it helped distract him from the increasingly dangerous problem named jeon jungkook.
unfortunately, jungkook refused to stay distracting distance away.
taehyung discovered this on a wednesday afternoon when he walked outside after work and nearly collided with a black motorcycle parked near the curb.
jungkook leaned against it wearing sunglasses.
taehyung blinked.
“what are you doing here?”
“picking you up.”
“… why?”
“you said your car was in the shop.”
taehyung had mentioned that once.
one time.
three days ago.
the fact jungkook remembered made warmth bloom inconveniently through his chest.
“you didn’t have to do that.”
“get on.”
that voice again.
like jungkook chose every action deliberately.
taehyung looked around nervously.
several teachers stared openly through classroom windows.
one literally pressed her face against the glass.
jungkook followed his gaze.
“they think i’m your boyfriend.”
taehyung choked on air.
jungkook smiled slowly.
“you’re blushing.”
“you say things very casually.”
“you get flustered very easily.”
“that’s your fault.”
“probably.”
taehyung hated how much he liked that answer.
the motorcycle ride home nearly killed him.
not physically.
emotionally.
jungkook handed him a helmet before saying quietly, “hold tight, angel.”
angel.
taehyung almost passed away directly beside the parking lot.
he climbed onto the bike carefully.
then froze.
where were his hands supposed to go?
jungkook glanced back.
“you can hold my waist.”
simple instructions.
except jungkook’s waist was very much attached to the rest of him.
taehyung hesitated before wrapping shaky arms around jungkook’s middle—muscles shifted instantly beneath his palms.
jungkook inhaled sharply.
taehyung felt it.
every inch of him suddenly hyperaware.
then jungkook started the motorcycle, taehyung instinctively tightened his hold.
jungkook smiled to himself the entire ride home.
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
“you’re staring again,” taehyung said one evening.
jungkook lounged across taehyung’s couch like he belonged there.
which, increasingly, he did.
“I like looking at you.”
“you say alarming things so casually.”
jungkook shrugged.
taehyung tried ignoring the way candlelight caught the silver ring through jungkook’s lip.
tried and failed.
they’d fallen into something strange over the past month.
not dating.
definitely not.
but too intimate to call a normal friendship.
jungkook showed up constantly.
breakfast before work.
fixing taehyung’s squeaky front gate.
carrying heavy groceries inside while taehyung short-circuited watching his arms flex.
existing in taehyung’s space with dangerous ease.
and every time taehyung tried pulling away slightly, jungkook looked at him with those unbearably patient eyes.
like he had all the time in the world.
tonight rain tapped softly against the windows while an old movie played quietly in the background.
taehyung sat cross-legged beside jungkook eating strawberries.
“you still do that,” jungkook murmured.
“what?”
“eat the ugly strawberries first.”
taehyung blinked.
“you remember that?”
“I remember everything about you.”
the room went silent.
taehyung’s pulse fluttered unevenly.
jungkook watched him for a long moment before speaking again.
“do you know I still have your sticky notes?”
taehyung frowned softly. “what sticky notes?”
“the ones you left me in high school.”
memory flickered.
tiny reminders stuck to textbooks and desks.
eat something. ~ t ♡
don’t skip class today. ~ t ♡
stop being mean to your mom, she’s trying too. ~ t ♡
proud of you. ~ t ♡
don’t let them make you mean, kookie. you have the kindest heart I know. ~ t ♡
taehyung laughed quietly. “kookie…”
“I kept every single one.”
the confession cracked something open inside taehyung, because jungkook said it without embarrassment.
without hesitation.
just truthfully.
jungkook leaned forward slowly.
close enough for taehyung to feel warmth radiating from him.
“you were the first person who made me feel safe,” he said softly.
taehyung’s eyes widened.
“kookie…”
“you looked at me like I wasn’t broken.”
taehyung’s throat tightened painfully.
jungkook’s gaze flickered downward briefly.
“to me,” he murmured, “you were always the prettiest thing in every room, and I wanted you so bad.”
taehyung stopped functioning.
hopelessly, because nobody had ever looked at him the way jungkook did.
not his ex-fiancé.
not anyone.
like beauty wasn’t the important part.
like taehyung himself was something precious.
jungkook reached out carefully.
giving taehyung every opportunity to move away.
taehyung didn’t.
warm fingers brushed curls away from his forehead.
“you’re shaking,” jungkook said quietly.
“I think you make me nervous.”
“good.”
taehyung stared at him.
jungkook smiled slightly.
“means you finally see me properly.”
the tension between them became unbearable after that.
heavy.
constant.
living beneath every interaction.
taehyung caught himself noticing things he shouldn’t.
the shape of jungkook’s hands.
the deep sound of his laugh.
the tattoos disappearing beneath his shirts.
the way his eyes softened whenever he looked at taehyung too long, and jungkook.. jungkook looked at taehyung like devotion with a pulse.
never forcing.
never pushing.
just waiting.
one night taehyung made pasta while jungkook sat on the kitchen counter drinking wine straight from the bottle.
“you know,” taehyung said lightly, “you’re much calmer now.”
“than when?”
“when you were younger.”
jungkook hummed thoughtfully.
“you calmed me down.”
taehyung looked over his shoulder.
jungkook held his gaze steadily.
“you’re the only person who ever could.”
the air shifted again.
that terrible, beautiful shift.
taehyung turned back to the stove too quickly.
his heart felt enormous.
“y’know how I used to fit in your lap,” jungkook said quietly, “try mine now.”
taehyung nearly dropped the wooden spoon.
“jungkook.”
“what?”
“you can’t just say things like that.”
“why not?”
taehyung turned around helplessly because jungkook looked entirely serious.
entirely composed and devastatingly attractive sitting on taehyung’s counter with tattooed hands and lazy confidence.
“you’re doing this on purpose.”
“doing what?”
“flirting with me.”
a pause.
“is it working?”
taehyung stared.
jungkook hopped off the counter slowly.
taehyung’s pulse immediately lost all coordination.
jungkook stopped directly in front of him.
close enough that taehyung had to tilt his head slightly upward now.
that realization alone nearly unraveled him again.
“you know what I think?” jungkook asked softly.
taehyung shook his head.
“I think you’ve wanted me too, longer than you will admit.”
taehyung inhaled sharply.
“you’re insane.”
“probably.”
jungkook reached around him suddenly.
taehyung’s breath caught, but jungkook only reached for the pasta sauce from the counter behind him.
his chest brushed taehyung’s shoulder lightly in the process.
accidental.
maybe.
taehyung felt feverish instantly.
jungkook leaned down near his ear.
“you’re burning up, angel.”
and taehyung finally realized something terrifying.
jungkook wasn’t seducing him recklessly.
he was seducing him patiently.
like someone savoring a favorite song after years of silence.
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
taehyung got jealous.
which was humiliating.
deeply humiliating.
mrs. jeon hosted another family gathering.
unfortunately one of jungkook’s old classmates attended.
a beautiful woman with sharp eyeliner and confident laughter who touched jungkook’s arm every thirty seconds.
taehyung hated her instantly.
not because she’d done anything wrong but because jungkook smiled at her.
that was all.
yet taehyung spent the entire evening sulking internally while pretending he absolutely was not sulking.
pathetic behavior.
jungkook noticed within twenty minutes.
of course he did.
taehyung escaped to the front porch for fresh air around sunset.
the sky glowed peach and gold beyond the trees.
he leaned against the railing trying not to feel ridiculous.
footsteps approached behind him.
“you’re quiet tonight.”
taehyung didn’t turn around.
“am I?”
“mhm.”
jungkook stepped beside him.
close.
always close.
taehyung stared stubbornly at the horizon.
“you don’t like her.”
mortification flooded instantly.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“you’re terrible at hiding jealousy.”
taehyung whipped around. “I am not jealous.”
jungkook looked delighted.
“you are.”
“i’m literally not.”
“angel.”
the endearment melted straight through taehyung’s anger.
which only made him angrier.
jungkook’s eyes softened slightly.
“she asked me out earlier.”
taehyung’s stomach dropped unpleasantly.
“oh.”
“I said no.”
taehyung blinked.
jungkook watched him carefully.
“do you know why?”
the evening air felt suddenly too thin.
taehyung shook his head.
jungkook stepped closer.
“i’ve wanted the same person since I was fifteen.”
silence.
the world seemed to narrow around them.
taehyung’s heartbeat thundered painfully.
jungkook lifted one hand slowly.
giving him time.
always giving him time.
warm fingers brushed against taehyung’s jaw.
“you really still don’t know?” he asked softly.
taehyung looked up at him helplessly and finally saw it clearly.
love.
years of it.
steady and devastating and patient.
all for him.
“kookie.. ”
jungkook’s expression changed instantly at the nickname.
tenderness cracked through all that careful restraint.
taehyung’s chest ached at the sight.
“you shouldn’t look at me like that,” he whispered.
“like what?”
“like i’m something precious.”
jungkook’s thumb brushed softly beneath taehyung’s eye.
“you are.”
and that finally broke him.
taehyung kissed him first.
clumsy.
impulsive.
more feeling than technique.
jungkook froze for half a second in pure shock.
then his hand slid carefully to the back of taehyung’s neck as if grounding himself.
the kiss deepened slowly.
warm mouths.
shaky breaths.
years collapsing quietly between them.
taehyung melted embarrassingly fast, because jungkook kissed exactly how he looked at him.
patiently.
like he’d memorized this moment long before it happened.
when they finally pulled apart, taehyung’s face burned crimson.
jungkook looked ruined.
actually ruined.
eyes dark.
breathing uneven.
forehead resting lightly against taehyung’s.
“you kissed me,” he said softly, like he still couldn’t believe it.
taehyung laughed breathlessly. “you were being persuasive.”
jungkook smiled then.
small.
real.
beautiful.
and taehyung thought, very suddenly.. 'i’m in trouble.'
'real trouble.'
the terrifying thing wasn’t that jungkook wanted him.
it was how safe taehyung felt being wanted by him.
the problem with kissing jeon jungkook was that taehyung could still feel it three days later.
not physically.
way worse.
emotionally.
like the kiss had rearranged furniture inside him without permission.
he stood in front of his kindergarten classroom pinning paper suns to the wall while internally replaying every second of it.
the warmth of jungkook’s mouth.
the careful way his hand held the back of his neck.
that tiny, stunned inhale when taehyung kissed him first.
it lingered beneath taehyung’s skin like expensive perfume.
which was inconvenient.
especially because jungkook himself had become even more inconvenient afterward.
not pushy or smug.
just.. attentive in a way that made taehyung’s heartbeat behave erratically.
motorcycle rides home.
late night phone calls that started casually and somehow drifted into intimate territory without warning.
“what are you doing?” jungkook asked one night.
taehyung lay sprawled across his couch grading coloring assignments.
“judging six-year-olds artistically.”
a low laugh crackled through the phone.
taehyung closed his eyes briefly.
god.
that laugh.
“you’re mean,” jungkook said.
“one child drew a blue giraffe.”
“maybe the giraffe was sad.”
taehyung snorted softly.
there was a pause.
comfortable and warm.
“have you been avoiding me?” jungkook asked quietly.
taehyung immediately sat upright.
“no.”
“liar.”
his stomach flipped, because jungkook always knew.
taehyung pressed fingers against his forehead. “i’m not avoiding you.”
“you left the gathering ten minutes after kissing me.”
“that’s because I panicked.”
“you panic beautifully.”
“that sounds stupid.”
jungkook laughed again.
taehyung hated how much he loved making him laugh.
“I can come over,” jungkook offered casually.
“at eleven thirty at night?”
“mhm.”
“sounds dangerous.”
“could be.”
taehyung stared at the ceiling helplessly.
jungkook’s voice softened slightly.
“angel.”
instant disaster.
every time.
“i’m trying to be good,” taehyung muttered weakly.
“who said I wanted you good?”
taehyung nearly hung up out of self-preservation, instead, he buried his burning face into his pillow while jungkook laughed quietly through the phone.
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
the town became insufferable after the kiss.
not because anyone knew, but because taehyung suddenly noticed jungkook everywhere.
at the gas station buying cigarettes for his uncle.
at the diner near the river.
leaning against his motorcycle outside taehyung’s school at pickup time while exhausted parents openly stared at him.
and every single time, jungkook looked at taehyung like the rest of the world had blurred around the edges.
it was becoming a serious problem.
especially because taehyung was weak.
hopelessly weak.
“you’re smiling at your phone again,” his coworker soojin observed.
taehyung looked up too fast. “I am not.”
“you absolutely are.”
“i’m literally answering a question.”
soojin leaned over dramatically.
taehyung snatched his phone away instantly.
too late.
her eyes widened.
“oh my god.”
“what?”
“that’s jeon jungkook.”
“… how do you know that?”
“everybody knows jungkook.”
that answer somehow did not comfort him.
soojin stared harder.
“wait.”
“no.”
“you like him.”
“no.”
“you absolutely like him.”
taehyung clutched his iced coffee.
soojin looked delighted.
“that man looks at you like he’d fight weather systems for you.”
“that’s such a dramatic thing to say.”
“it’s true.”
taehyung looked down at his phone before he could stop himself.
a text waited there.
koo (don’t panic)
did you eat lunch today or are you surviving on iced coffee again?
read 12:10 pm
taehyung’s chest warmed traitorously.
soojin saw his expression and groaned.
“you’re gone.”
taehyung smiled helplessly.
maybe he was.
the rainstorm started suddenly that friday evening.
taehyung left school later than usual, balancing lesson plans over his head while sprinting toward his front porch.
thunder cracked overhead.
by the time he unlocked the door, he was soaked through.
“perfect,” he muttered.
the lights flickered once.
twice.
then died entirely.
taehyung stared into darkness.
“… perfect.”
his phone buzzed almost immediately.
koo (don’t panic)
power’s out over there too?
read 6:03 pm
taehyung blinked.
how did he always know things so quickly?
yes, unfortunately ..
read 6:03 pm
three dots appeared instantly.
koo (don’t panic)
stay there
read 6:04 pm
taehyung stared.
‘stay there?’ as if taehyung had plans to wander dramatically into the thunderstorm.
twenty minutes later headlights swept across his rain-soaked windows.
taehyung opened the door to find jungkook standing there drenched in black clothes, hair dripping onto his forehead, and holding takeout.
taehyung’s heart did something embarrassingly soft.
“you drove in this weather?”
“you hate thunderstorms.”
the simple certainty in his voice made taehyung pause, because despite him comforting jungkook through thunderstorms throughout his adolescence, he hated them during his as well.. and jungkook remembered.
of course he remembered.
“you didn’t have to come.”
“I know.”
again.
always that answer.
jungkook stepped inside carefully, carrying warmth and rainwater with him.
the dark house suddenly felt smaller.
more intimate.
taehyung lit candles while jungkook unpacked food onto the kitchen counter.
lightning flashed briefly through the windows.
thunder followed seconds later.
taehyung flinched instinctively.
jungkook noticed immediately.
his expression softened in that quiet way taehyung was becoming dangerously addicted to.
“you're actually still scared of storms?” he asked gently.
“a little.”
jungkook leaned against the counter watching him.
“you used to pretend you weren’t.”
taehyung laughed softly.
“you remember everything, it’s creepy.”
“you liked that about me once.”
taehyung looked at him over candlelight.
jungkook looked beautiful in the dim glow.
sharp jaw.
dark eyes.
tattooed arms disappearing beneath rolled sleeves.
taehyung suddenly remembered kissing him.
bad timing.
his pulse immediately betrayed him.
jungkook’s gaze dropped briefly to his mouth.
there it was again.
that unbearable tension.
like a violin string pulled too tight.
taehyung turned away quickly and opened the takeout containers.
“you got my favorite.”
“you always order this when you’re sad.”
the words escaped before taehyung could stop them.
“i’m not sad anymore.”
when taehyung glanced up, jungkook was already looking at him.
carefully.
hope flickering somewhere deep beneath his composure.
thunder rolled again outside.
taehyung swallowed.
the candlelight softened everything.
made jungkook look less dangerous somehow.
though maybe that was the dangerous part.
“can I ask you something?” taehyung said quietly.
jungkook nodded.
“when did this happen?”
“this?”
“you… liking me.”
jungkook’s expression changed slightly.
thoughtfully.
“I don’t know exactly.”
taehyung sat across from him slowly.
jungkook traced condensation along his water glass.
“you wanna know the first time I realized it was bad though?”
taehyung nodded before he could stop himself.
jungkook smiled faintly.
“you were twenty.”
taehyung blinked.
“that young?”
“mhm.”
“you were still fifteen.”
“you wore this oversized pink sweater,” jungkook continued quietly, ignoring him. “and you fell asleep on my moms couch waiting for me to come back home.”
memory flickered dimly in taehyung’s mind.
jungkook returning late after another fight.
“I remember carrying you to the extra bedroom because you refused to wake up.”
taehyung laughed softly. “I was exhausted.”
“you wrapped your arms around my neck in your sleep and made this adorable sound.”
taehyung’s breath caught.
jungkook’s eyes stayed on the table as he spoke.
“and all I remember thinking was …”
he stopped.
taehyung waited quietly.
jungkook finally looked up.
“… if anyone else ever had you, i’d lose my fucking mind.”
the room went still.
taehyung stared at him across flickering candlelight and realized something slowly, jungkook had been restraining himself for years.
not because he was uncertain, but because taehyung was—and suddenly that devotion felt almost unbearable to witness.
“you really loved me all that time?” taehyung whispered.
jungkook’s expression softened instantly.
“still do.”
taehyung looked away too fast.
his chest hurt, because no one had ever loved him like this before.
so passionately and patient without demanding anything back.
thunder cracked loudly overhead.
the lights flickered back on suddenly.
taehyung startled slightly.
jungkook smiled.
“there’s my pretty baby.”
taehyung’s brain short-circuited instantly.
“what?”
jungkook looked entirely too pleased with himself.
“you heard me.”
taehyung stood abruptly and walked to the sink purely to escape his own nervous system.
behind him, jungkook laughed quietly.
“you flirt like a criminal,” taehyung muttered.
“I learned from you.”
“that is absolutely false.”
jungkook rose from his chair slowly.
taehyung sensed him approaching before he even turned around.
every nerve ending immediately lit up.
jungkook stopped directly behind him.
close enough for warmth to press against taehyung’s back but not touching.
that somehow still made everything worse.
“you know what I think?” jungkook murmured.
taehyung gripped the counter.
“hm?”
“I think you like when I flirt with you.”
taehyung closed his eyes.
because yes.
terribly.
hopelessly.
“yes,” he admitted finally.
silence.
jungkook inhaled softly behind him.
like honesty affected him too.
taehyung turned carefully.
jungkook looked unfair in kitchen light.
rain tapping against windows behind him.
dark hair messy.
eyes warm and intent.
taehyung’s heart stumbled painfully.
“you’re staring again,” jungkook said quietly.
“I can’t help it lately.”
that answer visibly affected him.
a small crack in composure.
taehyung noticed immediately.
interesting.
very interesting, because jungkook always seemed so controlled now.
smooth.
steady—but taehyung was beginning to discover the quickest way beneath that calm exterior: want him back.
jungkook lifted one hand slowly toward taehyung’s face, pausing hesitantly.
taehyung leaned into the touch before he could think better of it.
the sound jungkook made in response was tiny.
barely there.
still devastating.
his thumb brushed softly along taehyung’s cheekbone.
“you have no idea what you do to me, angel.” jungkook murmured.
taehyung’s pulse fluttered wildly.
“maybe i’m starting to.”
jungkook stared at him for one long second then his hand slid carefully around taehyung’s waist.
gentle.
questioning.
taehyung stepped closer instinctively and jungkook’s restraint finally snapped a little.
not dramatically.
just enough.
he kissed taehyung slowly this time.
deep enough to feel dangerous.
one hand warm at his waist while the other cradled his jaw carefully like taehyung was something precious.
taehyung melted immediately.
which was humiliating.
his fingers curled instinctively into jungkook’s shirt.
jungkook inhaled sharply against his mouth.
there.
again.
that tiny loss of composure.
taehyung liked it far too much.
the kiss deepened sensually before jungkook pulled back suddenly, breathing uneven.
taehyung blinked dazedly. “what?”
jungkook rested his forehead against taehyung’s.
“If I keep kissing you,” he said quietly, “i’m gonna forget how to behave.”
taehyung’s entire body went hot because the terrifying part wasn’t even the warning.
it was how gentle he sounded giving it.
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
after the second kiss, taehyung stopped pretending things between them could ever be normal again.
not that normal had survived very long to begin with.
but now? now every interaction carried heat beneath it.
every glance lingered too long.
every accidental touch felt deliberate afterward, and jungkook.. jungkook became calmer somehow.
which was deeply unfair.
taehyung expected cockiness after kissing him twice.
expected smug teasing and unbearable confidence.
instead jungkook moved through taehyung’s life with quiet certainty.
like he already knew taehyung was slowly falling apart for him.
which, unfortunately, was true.
very true.
“you’re distracted again.”
taehyung blinked at soojin from across the teacher’s lounge.
“hm?”
“you poured coffee into your yogurt.”
taehyung looked down in horror.
“oh my god.”
soojin narrowed her eyes immediately.
“that man is ruining your cognitive abilities.”
taehyung flushed. “nobody’s ruining anything.”
“you look like somebody in a historical romance waiting for handwritten letters.”
“that’s dramatic.”
“you sighed at your phone this morning.”
“I did not sigh.”
“you absolutely sighed.”
taehyung buried his burning face in his hands.
because the worst part?
jungkook hadn’t even done anything outrageous lately.
no shameless flirting.
no dangerous comments whispered too close to his ear.
nothing except existing with unbearable attentiveness.
opening doors.
texting him reminders to eat.
showing up outside school with lattes and pastries, exactly how taehyung liked them.
listening.
really listening whenever taehyung spoke.
it made everything infinitely worse—because taehyung was beginning to realize something terrifying: jungkook didn’t just desire him.
he cherished him and that kind of affection was much harder to defend against.
friday evening arrived warm and gold.
taehyung stood barefoot in his kitchen humming softly while washing strawberries when a knock sounded at the door.
he smiled instinctively before even opening it.
which felt revealing.
jungkook leaned against the porch railing holding a paper bag from taehyung’s favorite bakery.
black jeans.
dark gray shirt.
silver rings catching evening sunlight.
taehyung’s pulse immediately lost structure.
“you’re staring again,” jungkook observed.
“you make it difficult not to.”
the words slipped out accidentally.
taehyung’s face burst into heat instantly.
jungkook, meanwhile, looked momentarily stunned.
then something warm unfolded slowly across his expression.
something softer.
“can I come in?” he asked quietly.
taehyung stepped aside too quickly.
jungkook smiled to himself while entering.
the house had begun smelling faintly like him lately.
cedarwood.
motorcycle leather.
smoke lingering in expensive cologne.
taehyung tried not to think about how much he liked that.
“you brought pastries,” he said weakly.
“you sounded tired earlier.”
taehyung stared at the bakery bag for a second too long because no one had ever paid attention to him like this before.
not consistently.
not thoughtfully.
his ex-fiancé used to forget entire conversations.
meanwhile jungkook remembered the exact tea or snack taehyung ate when stressed.
it was unfair.
“you okay?” jungkook asked softly.
taehyung looked up.
there it was again.
that look.
like jungkook monitored his moods instinctively now.
taehyung exhaled quietly.
“you’re very attentive.”
a pause.
then jungkook shrugged once.
“only with you.”
that should not have made taehyung’s chest ache.
yet somehow it did.
jungkook placed the pastries onto the counter before noticing the strawberries.
“still cutting the tops off I see.”
taehyung blinked. “most people do.”
“no,” jungkook said. “you do it because you hate the texture.”
“… why do you know that?”
“you told me once when I was younger.”
taehyung stared at him helplessly.
“how do you remember these things?”
jungkook leaned against the counter casually.
“because it’s you.”
simple answer.
simple devastating answer.
taehyung looked away before his feelings became visibly catastrophic.
outside, sunset painted amber light across the kitchen walls.
jungkook watched taehyung move quietly around the room.
soft oversized cream sweater slipping off one shoulder slightly.
platinum curls messy from humidity.
tiny gold earrings glinting whenever he turned his head.
beautiful.
he was so fucking beautiful.
jungkook had spent years teaching himself restraint around him.
at fifteen, it felt impossible.
at twenty-two, it felt lethal.
taehyung opened the fridge before frowning.
“what?”
“i’m out of groceries.”
“i’ll go.”
taehyung turned quickly. “you don’t have to.”
“I know.”
again.
always that answer.
taehyung laughed softly under his breath.
jungkook paused.
god, that sound still affected him immediately.
“what?” taehyung asked.
“you laugh differently now.”
taehyung blinked.
“how?”
“better.”
the honesty of it stole the air from the room.
taehyung looked down quietly because heartbreak had changed him.
he knew it had.
however, there were softer edges to his loneliness now.
careful pauses before speaking.
moments where his smile arrived a little late.
jungkook noticed all of it.
of course he did.
“i’m getting better,” taehyung said finally.
“I know.”
warm fingers brushed lightly against taehyung’s wrist.
gentle.
grounding.
“you don’t have to rush it.”
taehyung swallowed hard because somehow jungkook never treated his sadness like inconvenience.
only something fragile to hold carefully.
“you make me feel very seen,” taehyung admitted quietly.
jungkook’s gaze softened instantly.
“you are.”
the room went still.
breathing felt difficult suddenly.
taehyung looked at jungkook’s mouth before he could stop himself.
silver ring catching golden light.
jungkook noticed immediately.
his eyes darkened just slightly.
“angel,” he murmured.
taehyung’s stomach flipped violently.
that nickname was becoming a genuine medical issue.
“hm?”
jungkook stepped closer slowly.
giving taehyung every chance to move away.
taehyung stayed exactly where he was.
“you keep looking at me like you want something.”
the lowness in his voice made warmth spread through taehyung instantly.
“you say dangerous things very casually.”
“so i've been told.”
taehyung laughed nervously.
jungkook moved closer again.
now only inches apart.
close enough that taehyung could feel warmth radiating from him.
close enough to notice the tiny scar near jungkook’s jaw from a teenage skateboarding accident.
taehyung used to clean blood from that scar with trembling hands.
now he just wanted to kiss it.
the realization nearly short-circuited him.
“you’re thinking too hard, baby.” jungkook said softly.
“i’m trying to survive, actually.”
a small smile tugged at jungkook’s mouth.
“am I that overwhelming?”
“yes.”
jungkook’s expression flickered slightly at the confession.
taehyung noticed.
interesting, because despite all his composure, jungkook still reacted strongly whenever taehyung admitted wanting him back.
“you know,” taehyung said carefully, “I think i’m starting to understand something.”
“what?”
“you’re not actually as calm as you pretend.”
jungkook went very still.
taehyung stepped slightly closer.
heart pounding now.
“but you hide it better than when you were younger.”
silence stretched.
then jungkook laughed softly under his breath.
“there he is.”
“there who is?”
“the you that notices everything.”
taehyung’s pulse fluttered because suddenly jungkook sounded pleased.
like being understood by taehyung mattered.
maybe too much.
jungkook reached up suddenly and tucked one loose curl behind taehyung’s ear.
his fingers lingered briefly against soft skin.
“you know what used to drive me insane?” he asked quietly.
taehyung shook his head slowly.
“you touching me without thinking about it.”
memory flickered instantly.
straightening jungkook’s tie before church.
fixing his hair after motorcycle helmets, even when he was too young to ride them then.
wiping food from the corner of his mouth.
tiny affectionate gestures taehyung never considered deeply.
meanwhile jungkook apparently remembered all of them in painful detail.
“you’d touch my face,” jungkook murmured, eyes fixed on him now. “my hair. my hands.”
taehyung’s breath caught.
“and every time,” jungkook continued softly, “i’d spend the rest of the day trying not to lose my mind over it.”
the confession wrapped around taehyung’s spine like heat because suddenly he could see it differently.
teenage jungkook sitting silently while taehyung patched bruises.
watching taehyung move around kitchens and living rooms with quiet devotion already blooming somewhere dangerous inside him.
years.
he’d loved taehyung for years.
“how did you survive me?” taehyung whispered before thinking better of it.
jungkook smiled slowly.
“barely did.”
that smile ruined him a little.
taehyung looked down shyly.
jungkook’s gaze softened instantly at the sight.
then, quietly. “look at me.”
taehyung obeyed before realizing he’d done it automatically.
jungkook noticed too.
his eyes darkened subtly.
not because of control, but because of trust and somehow that felt infinitely more intimate.
“you know what I think?” jungkook murmured.
taehyung swallowed.
“what?”
“I think you like that.”
taehyung’s face burned, because yes.
god, yes.
“I think,” jungkook continued carefully, “you spent a long time loving people who only saw pieces of you.”
the words landed too accurately.
taehyung looked away instinctively.
jungkook stepped closer immediately.
gentler now.
“no, angel,” he said softly. “don’t do that.”
taehyung blinked up at him.
“that thing where you disappear when I understand you too well, it’s like you’re still scared even though i'm an adult now.”
the room felt unbearably quiet.
taehyung’s throat tightened unexpectedly because he did do that, but jungkook had known him too long.
too deeply.
he noticed every retreat.
warm fingers tilted taehyung’s chin upward carefully.
“you don’t have to hide from me.”
the tenderness in his voice nearly destroyed him.
taehyung’s eyes stung suddenly.
embarrassing.
jungkook’s expression softened immediately.
“hey,” he murmured.
taehyung laughed shakily. “you’re very intense.”
“I know.”
“you make me feel things very aggressively.”
that finally made jungkook laugh.
rich and low and beautiful.
taehyung stared at him helplessly again.
“there,” jungkook said quietly. “that look.”
“what look?”
“the one like you can’t decide if you wanna kiss me or run away.”
taehyung smiled despite himself.
“maybe both.”
jungkook stepped into his space fully then.
hands sliding carefully against taehyung’s waist.
secure.
warm.
taehyung’s breath hitched instantly.
“which one wins?” jungkook asked softly.
taehyung looked at him for one long second then reached up and touched the silver ring in jungkook’s lip carefully with his thumb.
the reaction was immediate.
jungkook inhaled sharply.
eyes darkening.
composure cracking right down the center.
taehyung felt heat curl low in his stomach at the realization that he could affect jungkook deeply too.
not just physically.
something deeper.
“you like that?” taehyung whispered softly.
jungkook stared at him.
“careful.”
the warning should have intimidated him, instead, it sent warmth racing through his bloodstream.
“you know,” he murmured, suddenly brave, “you’re not the only one who remembers things.”
something dangerous flickered across jungkook’s face.
“oh?”
“I remember you too.”
taehyung’s fingers brushed lightly along jungkook’s jaw.
“you used to follow me everywhere.”
jungkook smiled faintly. “still do.”
“I noticed.”
“and?”
taehyung looked at him steadily this time.
no retreating.
no panic.
“I think I like being followed by you.”
that finally snapped the last thread of restraint.
jungkook kissed him hard enough to steal the breath from his lungs.
that kiss changed the atmosphere between them permanently.
not dramatically.
quietly.
like rain soaking through fabric until suddenly everything was heavy.
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
taehyung noticed it in little things first.
the way jungkook looked at his mouth more often now.
the way taehyung instinctively moved closer whenever jungkook entered a room.
how silence between them no longer felt empty, just charged, and perhaps most dangerously of all: taehyung stopped being afraid of wanting him back.
that realization arrived slowly on a sunday afternoon.
mrs. jeon had volunteered both of them to help reorganize the old church storage room because apparently “young people have knees that still work.”
taehyung immediately regretted agreeing.
not because of the work but because jungkook showed up wearing a black sleeveless shirt.
which felt personally targeted.
“you did that on purpose,” taehyung muttered before he could stop himself.
jungkook looked down at his own clothes innocently.
“did what?”
taehyung gestured helplessly at.. well all of him.
jungkook’s mouth twitched.
“angel,” he said softly, “you’ve gotta start finishing your sentences baby.”
taehyung turned around instantly before his face combusted.
jungkook laughed quietly behind him.
the church storage room smelled like old paper and dust.
sunlight streamed through narrow windows while taehyung sorted decorations into boxes with determined concentration, or perhaps attempted concentration.
it was difficult concentrating when jungkook kept lifting heavy things nearby like some sort of greek myth specifically designed to torment him.
taehyung was crouched near a box of christmas ornaments when he heard a low grunt behind him.
he turned instinctively and froze.
jungkook had one large hand braced against a metal shelf while effortlessly lifting a heavy wooden table with the other.
muscles flexed sharply beneath tattooed skin, the veins in his forearms stood out.
taehyung’s brain promptly left his body.
jungkook glanced over mid-lift.
caught him staring instantly.
of course he did.
a slow smile appeared.
“you okay there?”
taehyung blinked rapidly. “mhm.”
jungkook set the table down carefully before walking closer.
taehyung’s pulse immediately malfunctioned.
“you looked overwhelmed.”
“i’m literally fine.”
“you looked at my arms like they offended you personally.”
taehyung buried his face in the ornament box.
jungkook laughed softly above him.
“you’re cute when you’re flustered.”
“please stop talking.”
“no.”
taehyung peeked up just enough to glare weakly.
huge mistake.
jungkook leaned down slightly.
close enough to invade his space without touching him.
taehyung’s heartbeat stuttered hard.
“there’s that look again,” jungkook murmured.
“what look?”
“you wanna climb me like a tree but you’re trying to stay polite about it.”
“jeon jungkook.”
“what?”
“you were not this evil as a teenager.”
jungkook’s eyes darkened slightly.
“as a teenager,” he said softly, “I was trying very hard to control myself around you.”
the air shifted instantly.
taehyung stared at him, because beneath the teasing sat something real.
years of restraint.
years of wanting quietly.
jungkook crouched beside him now.
their knees brushed lightly.
neither moved away.
“I never wanted to make you uncomfortable,” jungkook said quietly.
taehyung’s chest tightened.
“of course you didn’t.”
“I wanted to,” jungkook admitted softly. “sometimes.”
taehyung swallowed.
“when?”
a pause.
“when you’d sit on my bed lecturing me after fights.”
memories flickered vividly.
teenage jungkook sprawled across rumpled sheets with split knuckles and lips while taehyung cleaned cuts with antiseptic.
“you used to get so close to my face,” jungkook murmured. “and you smelled like vanilla all the time, I wanted to kiss you so bad.”
taehyung’s ears burned.
“you remember that?”
“I remember everything.”
of course he did.
jungkook reached out slowly and brushed dust from taehyung’s sleeve.
the gesture felt strangely intimate.
“you’d touch me so casually,” he continued softly. “like it never occurred to you what you were doing to me.”
taehyung’s stomach fluttered—because now? now it absolutely occurred to him.
every touch felt loaded.
taehyung looked down at jungkook’s hands.
large now.
veiny.
tattooed.
strong enough to lift heavy furniture effortlessly but gentle when touching him.
always gentle with him.
“you know something embarrassing?” taehyung asked suddenly.
jungkook’s expression softened immediately.
“what?”
“I think hearing your voice changed my life a little.”
jungkook blinked once.
“what?”
taehyung covered his face instantly.
“oh my god, never mind.”
but jungkook caught his wrist carefully before he could hide completely.
“no,” he said, visibly delighted now. “explain.”
taehyung groaned softly.
“your voice got deeper while you were abroad.”
“and?”
“and it’s distracting.”
jungkook stared at him for exactly one second before laughing under his breath.
not mocking.
warm.
almost disbelieving.
“you’re killing me lately,” he murmured.
taehyung peeked at him through his fingers.
jungkook looked genuinely affected.
these confessions genuinely mattered to him far more than taehyung realized.
“you really notice things about me too?” jungkook asked quietly.
the vulnerability beneath the question startled him.
taehyung lowered his hands slowly.
“kookie,” he said softly, “i’ve always noticed you.”
jungkook’s expression changed completely at the nickname in that tone.
something rougher slipped briefly beneath his composure.
taehyung watched it happen in real time.
interesting.
very interesting—because despite all his confidence, jungkook still unraveled whenever taehyung sounded genuinely affectionate.
taehyung leaned slightly closer before thinking better of it.
jungkook noticed immediately.
his gaze dropped to taehyung’s mouth.
then stayed there.
“you know,” taehyung whispered carefully, “I think i’m starting to understand why everyone warned me about you.”
jungkook’s brows lifted slightly.
“oh?”
“you’re very dangerous.”
a slow smile appeared.
“only around you.”
“that’s somehow worse.”
“it should be.”
taehyung laughed breathlessly.
then, without thinking, he reached up and brushed something from the corner of jungkook’s mouth.
the movement was instinctive.
familiar.
years old.
both of them froze instantly afterward because there it was again.
that old habit.
taehyung’s soft thumb brushing against jungkook’s skin without hesitation.
jungkook went very still beneath the touch.
his eyes darkened slowly.
painfully.
taehyung’s breath caught.
“you still do that,” jungkook said quietly.
taehyung’s hand remained suspended near his face.
“do what?”
“take care of me like it’s natural.”
the tenderness in his voice nearly ruined him.
taehyung swallowed hard because the terrifying thing was it was natural.
always had been.
jungkook lifted his hand carefully.
threaded their fingers together.
simple gesture.
devastating effect.
taehyung stared at their hands silently.
jungkook’s thumb brushed lightly across his knuckles.
“you know what I used to think about?” jungkook asked softly.
taehyung shook his head slightly.
“wanting you to sit in my lap.”
taehyung nearly short-circuited.
“jungkook.”
“you brought it up first.”
“I absolutely did not.”
“you said I used to fit in yours.”
taehyung remembered that late night conversation immediately and regretted everything.
jungkook leaned closer slowly.
“so, again,” he murmured, eyes warm now, “try mine now.”
taehyung made a sound somewhere between a gasp and a nervous laugh.
“are you trying to kill me?”
“not intentionally.”
“that’s not reassuring.”
jungkook smiled softly.
“you know i’d never push you, right?”
the sudden seriousness caught taehyung off guard.
jungkook watched him steadily.
“I mean it,” he continued quietly. “I can flirt with you all day, but if you ever want me to stop ..”
“I know.”
and that was the problem.
jungkook looked dangerous to everyone else, but taehyung had known him too long.
seen too much.
underneath all the tattoos and sharp edges lived the same boy who once sat silently on taehyung’s bedroom floor at seventeen because he trusted him more than anyone else.
the same boy who memorized every kindness he’d ever been shown.
taehyung squeezed jungkook’s hand gently.
“i’m not scared of you, koo.”
jungkook’s expression softened instantly.
“no?”
taehyung smiled faintly.
“I think you’re scared of me a little, actually.”
that startled a laugh out of him.
“angel,” jungkook murmured, “you have no idea.”
before taehyung could answer, voices echoed faintly from outside the storage room.
the other church volunteers returning, reality slightly crashed back in.
jungkook sighed softly and released his hand, the absence of warmth felt immediate.
taehyung hated how much he noticed that now.
they stood slowly.
too close.
still staring.
then jungkook reached out suddenly and adjusted the collar of taehyung’s sweater carefully.
“you’re staring again,” jungkook murmured quietly.
taehyung looked at him helplessly.
“I think i’m past fixing that.”
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
after the church storage room incident, taehyung had made the catastrophic mistake of becoming confident.
not fully confident.
he still panicked every time jungkook called him “angel” or “baby” in that low voice.
still lost entire trains of thought whenever tattooed hands circled around his waist.
still experienced minor spiritual collapse every time jungkook leaned down close enough for taehyung to smell cedarwood and smoke on his skin, but now? now he understood something important.
jungkook unraveled completely too.
that confirmed knowledge changed everything because beforehand taehyung had felt like prey beneath jungkook’s attention.
now he realized the wolf was starving right back and unfortunately for the both of them, taehyung had started enjoying it.
dangerous development.
very dangerous.
“you’re smiling at nothing again,” soojin observed.
taehyung blinked at her from across the teacher’s lounge.
“i’m literally eating soup.”
“you look haunted by romance.”
“that sounds dumb.”
soojin narrowed her eyes. “you kissed him again, didn’t you?”
taehyung nearly inhaled broth directly into his lungs.
“no.”
too fast.
way too fast.
soojin pointed dramatically. “that was guilt speed.”
taehyung buried his face in his hands because technically they had kissed again.
several times, actually.
not recklessly.
just enough to keep taehyung in a constant state of emotional instability.
one recently on-top his kitchen counter while jungkook held his waist possessively. they were suppose to be making brownies.
another against taehyung’s front door after midnight when neither of them wanted the evening to end.
slow kisses.
kisses that felt dangerously meaningful.
which somehow made them infinitely more overwhelming.
“you’re gone,” soojin sighed dramatically.
taehyung smiled helplessly into his soup.
maybe he was.
that friday, the town hosted its annual summer festival near the riverfront.
taehyung should have stayed home.
truly.
mrs. jeon called him personally and declared, “you’ve been acting like a widowed poet all month. go outside.”
so now taehyung stood beneath strings of golden lights while children sprinted past with cotton candy and music drifting warmly through the evening air.
the festival glowed softly against the river.
food stands.
carnival games.
local bands playing half-off-key love songs beneath lantern light.
it felt nostalgic in the most dangerous way.
especially because jungkook hadn’t arrived yet.
taehyung kept checking anyway.
pathetic behavior.
he was midway through buying lemonade when someone bumped into him lightly.
“sorry,” a familiar voice laughed.
taehyung turned and froze.
minji.
jungkook’s old classmate.
the pretty one from the barbecue, and the one who flirted shamelessly.
taehyung immediately became weird about it.
“oh,” he said eloquently.
minji smiled brightly. “taehyung, right?”
“mhm.”
“I heard you moved back.”
“temporarily,” taehyung lied automatically.
her brows lifted slightly then casually, “have you seen jungkook tonight?”
taehyung’s stomach twisted unpleasantly.
“no.”
“hm.” she smiled into her drink. “I texted him earlier.”
that should not have bothered him.
yet suddenly taehyung wanted to throw himself directly into the river, before he could answer, headlights swept across the street nearby.
a motorcycle rolled slowly toward the festival entrance, taehyung recognized it instantly.
unfortunately so did minji.
“well,” she laughed softly, “there he is.”
jungkook removed his helmet in one smooth motion.
dark hair falling messily across his forehead, black fitted shirt hugging broad shoulders, silver chain flashing briefly beneath festival lights.
taehyung’s pulse immediately betrayed him.
jungkook looked up and spotted them, his expression changed instantly.
sharper.
focused entirely on taehyung.
minji waved cheerfully.
jungkook barely acknowledged her, instead, he walked directly toward taehyung with that same terrifying stillness he always had around him.
like nothing else fully held his attention once taehyung entered the room.
or street.
or universe.
“you came,” jungkook said softly.
taehyung hated how warm those two words made him feel.
“I was threatened.”
jungkook smiled faintly.
minji looked between them curiously.
“you two are weirdly intense,” she observed.
neither answered because jungkook was already looking at taehyung’s face carefully.
“you okay?”
there it was again.
that attentiveness.
like he could read emotions directly beneath taehyung’s skin.
taehyung smiled too quickly. “perfect.”
jungkook’s eyes narrowed slightly.
liar, that look said instantly.
then minji touched jungkook’s arm casually.
“walk around with me?” she asked.
the atmosphere changed immediately.
taehyung looked away before anyone noticed the reaction on his face, but jungkook noticed.
of course he did.
he always did.
“no,” jungkook answered simply.
minji blinked.
“oh.”
“i’m here with someone.”
the words landed directly beneath taehyung’s ribs.
minji followed jungkook’s gaze slowly.
straight toward taehyung.
understanding flashed instantly across her face.
“oh,” she repeated softly this time.
then, unexpectedly, she smiled.
not bitter.
almost amused.
“well,” she laughed lightly, “that explains literally everything.”
before taehyung could process what that meant, she waved goodbye and disappeared into the crowd.
silence settled between them afterward.
festival lights reflected gold against the river nearby.
music drifted softly through humid summer air and jungkook was still looking at him.
too closely.
“what did she mean by that?” taehyung asked carefully.
jungkook shrugged once.
“everybody knew I was obsessed with you.”
taehyung stared.
“.. everybody?”
“mhm.”
“you hid it terribly then.”
“no,” jungkook corrected calmly. “I hid it from you.”
taehyung’s entire nervous system glitched because somehow that was worse.
way worse.
jungkook stepped closer slowly.
“are you jealous, baby?”
taehyung looked away immediately.
“maybe a little.”
the confession slipped out before he could stop it.
jungkook went very still.
“you have no idea how happy that makes me.”
taehyung looked back up in disbelief.
“you’re insane.”
“probably.”
“but in a concerningly attractive way.”
that startled a real laugh out of jungkook.
taehyung stared automatically.
jungkook caught him instantly.
“there you go again.”
“you laugh pretty.”
the words escaped accidentally.
jungkook’s composure cracked visibly.
tiny, but enough.
interesting.
very interesting—because everday taehyung became more and more aware of exactly where jungkook’s weak points lived.
affection.
attention.
softness.
being wanted back openly.
it affected him every single time.
jungkook looked away briefly and rubbed his thumb against his bottom lip. “you can’t just say things like that casually,” he muttered.
taehyung blinked innocently. “why not?”
jungkook stared at him.
then laughed quietly under his breath.
“oh, you’re getting bold now.”
maybe he was.
that realization warmed something dangerous inside him.
the festival crowd shifted around them while evening deepened overhead.
somewhere nearby children screamed excitedly near carnival rides.
jungkook tilted his head slightly toward the river path.
“walk with me?”
taehyung nodded immediately.
they wandered slowly beneath glowing lanterns and old oak trees draped in lights, every contact sent warmth skittering through taehyung’s bloodstream.
“you know what’s weird?” taehyung asked suddenly.
“what?”
“I keep forgetting you’re younger than me now.”
jungkook looked amused. “now?”
“you know what I mean.”
“no, explain.”
taehyung groaned softly.
“stop enjoying my suffering.”
“impossible.”
taehyung glanced sideways at him.
jungkook looked devastating beneath festival lights.
dark curls shifting softly in the breeze, tattooed forearms exposed beneath rolled sleeves, molten brown eyes warmer tonight somehow.
taehyung realized with sudden clarity: he was absolutely doomed.
“you’re staring again,” jungkook murmured.
“I blame your face.”
jungkook chuckled, “that’s fair.” then casually, “you look beautiful tonight.”
taehyung nearly walked directly into a lamp post.
warm fingers wrapped around his soft skin, both of them paused because now they were touching openly.
naturally.
jungkook looked down at their hands briefly then back up at taehyung.
“careful,” he murmured softly. “you’re making me want things.”
taehyung’s breath caught.
“what kind of things?”
the question slipped out quietly.
jungkook’s eyes darkened immediately.
hunger.
the look settled low in taehyung’s stomach like fire.
jungkook stepped closer until festival noise blurred faintly around them.
“you really wanna ask me that here?” he murmured.
taehyung’s pulse jumped violently because jungkook’s voice had dropped deeper again.
that dangerous register.
the one that made taehyung forget basic motor skills.
“i’m curious,” taehyung admitted softly.
jungkook studied him for one long second.
then his thumb brushed slowly across taehyung’s wrist.
“you know what I want right now?”
taehyung shook his head slightly.
jungkook leaned down closer.
close enough that taehyung felt his breath against his ear.
“I want you sitting on my bike holding onto me while I drive nowhere important.”
the image hit taehyung instantly: his arms around jungkook’s waist, chest pressed against broad shoulders, night air rushing past while jungkook’s voice vibrated low through his body every time he spoke.
heat spread straight through him.
jungkook noticed immediately.
“there it is,” he murmured softly.
“what?”
“that look.”
taehyung swallowed.
jungkook’s gaze flickered slowly across his face.
“you know,” he said quietly, “you’re much easier to read than you think.”
“and what am I thinking right now?”
a tiny smile tugged at jungkook’s mouth.
“that you’re trying very hard to behave.”
taehyung looked away instantly.
jungkook laughed softly, then his expression shifted suddenly.
more serious now.
he reached up carefully and brushed curls away from taehyung’s forehead.
the touch lingered.
warm fingers against his temple.
“can I tell you something honest?” jungkook asked quietly.
taehyung nodded.
“I think you’re finally starting to look at me the way i’ve looked at you for years.”
the tenderness in his voice nearly unraveled him because he was so right.
taehyung had spent so long trying to reconcile old memories with the man standing in front of him now, but lately those lines blurred together beautifully.
the rough teenager with bruised knuckles was now the patient man touching his face carefully beneath lantern light.
same person.
same eyes.
same quiet devotion underneath everything.
taehyung stepped closer without realizing it.
jungkook’s gaze dropped instantly to his mouth.
neither moved.
festival music drifted softly through warm summer air around them.
“kiss me before I lose my nerve.”
jungkook’s restraint snapped so beautifully.
jungkook kissed him beneath lantern light like he had been waiting years for permission.
the river breeze moved softly through taehyung’s curls while distant carnival music blurred around them into something dreamy and indistinct.
warm hands settled at taehyung’s waist.
dangerously careful for someone kissing him like that.
taehyung melted immediately, which was becoming a pattern.
jungkook deepened the kiss slowly, thumb brushing beneath taehyung’s sweater while the crowd moved around them completely unaware.
the intimacy of that nearly destroyed taehyung, being wanted openly.
when they finally pulled apart, both breathing unevenly, jungkook rested his forehead briefly against taehyung’s.
“you taste like lemonade,” he murmured softly.
taehyung laughed breathlessly.
“you taste like trouble.”
“that too.”
「𐙚⋆°🦢｡⋆♡ ˖
°𓇼❤⋆°✧・」
the warmth between them lingered afterward.
like something fragile had finally unfolded completely between them.
which was precisely why the conflict arrived two days later, apparently the universe believed taehyung deserved approximately forty-eight hours of peace.
it started with a phone call.
taehyung stood in his kitchen tuesday evening stirring soup absentmindedly when his phone lit up across the counter.
‘adrien.'
his stomach dropped instantly.
he hadn’t heard from him in almost three months.
not since the failed engagement, not since paris ended in silence sharp enough to cut through bone.
taehyung stared at the screen too long.
then answered quietly.
“hello?”
a pause.
“hi, taehyungie.”
the voice still sounded familiar enough to hurt.
smooth french accent.
warmth worn carefully thin around the edges.
taehyung closed his eyes briefly.
“what’s wrong?”
adrien laughed softly. “still dramatic, hm?”
“you only call when something’s wrong.”
silence.
“i’m in town.”
taehyung froze.
“what?”
“for work,” adrien clarified quickly. “just for a few days.”
his pulse began thudding unpleasantly, busan suddenly felt much too small.
“and I thought.." adrien hesitated. “maybe we should talk.”
taehyung gripped the edge of the counter, because despite everything, some part of him had imagined this moment eventually.
the confrontation.
the unfinished conversation.
the closure neither of them managed before things collapsed.
he wasn't still in love with adrien.
that part was gone, but five years did not disappear cleanly.
there were still ghosts attached to it.
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” taehyung admitted quietly.
“I understand.”
the softness in adrien’s voice made guilt twist unexpectedly through taehyung’s chest.
god, why did endings remain painful even after love died?
“I just..” adrien exhaled slowly. “I hate how things ended between us.”
taehyung looked down at the soup simmering untouched on the stove.
“so do I.”
another pause.
“so.. coffee? tomorrow?”
taehyung hesitated too long and that hesitation changed everything, because at that exact moment there was a knock at the front door.
three familiar knocks.
jungkook.
taehyung’s stomach flipped violently.
“taehyung?” adrien asked softly through the phone.
“I..” taehyung glanced toward the door helplessly. “tomorrow’s fine.”
the words had barely left his mouth when regret hit instantly.
not because meeting adrien was wrong, but it started to feel like betrayal.
“thank you,” adrien murmured.
they hung up and taehyung stood frozen in his kitchen staring at the door while anxiety bloomed sharp and immediate beneath his ribs.
knocking came again.
gentle this time.
“baby?” jungkook called softly through the wood. “you okay?”
taehyung’s heart squeezed painfully because jungkook’s voice still did that to him, still softened entire parts of him instinctively.
he opened the door and jungkook immediately knew something was wrong. he looked at him once and went still.
“what happened, angel?”
taehyung blinked. “nothing.”
direct lie.
jungkook stepped inside carefully, eyes fixed on his face now.
“you look upset.”
god, always noticing.
taehyung suddenly felt exhausted.
“I got a call,” he admitted quietly.
jungkook’s expression sharpened slightly.
“from who?”
silence stretched one second too long.
understanding flickered instantly across jungkook’s face.
not dramatic or angry.
worse.
quiet.
“your ex.”
taehyung swallowed.
“he’s in town.”
jungkook looked away briefly.
that tiny movement hurt taehyung more than anger would have because jungkook almost never looked away from him.
“what did he want?” jungkook asked finally.
“to talk.”
“and?”
taehyung hesitated.
again.
huge mistake.
jungkook laughed softly under his breath.
surely not amused.
“I see.”
“kookie..”
“you said yes.”
taehyung stepped closer instinctively. “it’s not like that.”
jungkook nodded once, but his jaw tightened slightly.
the sight unsettled taehyung immediately, jungkook rarely looked uncertain around him.
now suddenly there it was beneath the surface.
not jealousy exactly.
fear.
tiny and buried carefully deep.
taehyung realized something then with painful clarity: jungkook had waited for him for years and now the man who almost married him had returned out of nowhere.
of course that hurt.
“jungkook,” taehyung said softly.
jungkook looked back at him finally, expression controlled again.
too controlled.
“you don’t owe me explanations,” he said quietly.
that somehow felt infinitely worse than if he’d gotten angry.
“stop doing that.”
“doing what?”
“acting like you don’t care.”
something flickered sharply across jungkook’s face then.
“there’s never been a single moment where I didn’t care.”
the honesty in his voice cracked straight through taehyung’s chest.
jungkook rubbed tiredly at the back of his neck before continuing. “but i’m trying not to make this difficult for you.”
taehyung stared at him because there it was again.
that carefulness.
even hurt jungkook still prioritized taehyung’s comfort first—and suddenly guilt twisted viciously inside him.
“he was part of my life for a long time,” taehyung admitted quietly. “I can’t just pretend that didn’t exist.”
jungkook nodded slowly.
“I know.”
“you know?”
“I know what it’s like,” jungkook said softly, “to hold onto someone even after they’ve already left.”
the words landed heavily between them, because suddenly taehyung had realized jungkook had been doing exactly that with him for years.
waiting quietly.
loving patiently.
even when taehyung belonged to someone else.
taehyung’s throat tightened.
“kookie..”
“you should go,” jungkook interrupted gently.
taehyung blinked. “what?”
“to the coffee meeting.”
jungkook looked at him steadily now.
“if you need closure baby, get it.”
the maturity of that response somehow hurt more than possessiveness would have, because jungkook wasn’t trying to stop him.
even now.
even while visibly hurting.
taehyung stepped closer slowly.
“you really mean that?”
jungkook’s expression softened slightly.
“angel,” he murmured quietly, “i’d never cage you just because i’m scared.”
that sentence nearly broke him, because the terrifying thing was taehyung suddenly didn’t want anyone else’s love anymore.
not the polished elegance he had with adrien.
not the safe predictability.
he wanted this.
jungkook standing in his kitchen trying to hide heartbreak while still treating him gently.
taehyung reached for him instinctively.
warm fingers curling around tattooed wrists.
jungkook looked down briefly at the touch.
then back up.
“you’re upset,” taehyung whispered.
a tiny pause.
“yeah.”
taehyung’s chest ached.
“i’m not choosing him over you, koo.”
jungkook’s eyes softened immediately.
“angel, you don’t have to choose anybody but yourself tonight.”
“but what if I already did?”
silence.
jungkook stared at him carefully.
like he didn’t quite trust what he was hearing.
taehyung stepped closer again until barely inches separated them.
“you know what the problem is?” he said softly.
jungkook shook his head slightly.
“I think you got so used to loving me quietly that you still expect me to leave.”
something vulnerable flickered across jungkook’s face before he could hide it.
a direct hit.
taehyung’s heart twisted painfully, because despite all jungkook’s confidence now, part of him still looked at taehyung like someone temporary.
someone way too beautiful to keep.
taehyung lifted his hand carefully and touched jungkook’s jaw.
warm skin beneath his fingertips.
“i’m here.. with you.. for good,” he whispered.
jungkook closed his eyes briefly at the touch.
just one second.
then he opened them again and looked at taehyung with unbearable intensity.
“you have no idea,” he murmured quietly, “how badly I want to believe you.”
and for the first time since falling into this thing between them, taehyung realized love and sweet promises alone would not fix every wound between them immediately.