Chapter Text
Part of Jason thought it would be harder than this. He thought he might need to try a couple of nights, might need to convince people that he was serious. He had it all planned out in his head, what he would say if they asked if he was a rat and what he would do if the girls told him not to stand on the corner near them.
In the end, he’s only out there for 20 minutes before he’s getting in a stranger’s car.
(The girl’s on the corner actually do try to stop him. They ask how old he is and ask how much money he needs. They could pool some cash together for him, they say. But Jason can’t find it in himself to accept and by the time he starts wondering if he should, someone’s already pulled up to the curb.)
Jason spends the ride scratching his nails over his knuckles. He thinks he should say something. Should he be trying to be sexy? But he’s already in the man’s car. He doesn’t even know his name yet. They haven’t spoken a word to each other. The man just opened his door and gestured for Jason to get in.
Jason means to say something else, maybe something seductive or at least asking where they’re going, but what comes out is, “You’re going to pay me, right?”
The man looks over at him. He only has one hand on the steering wheel. He smiles. “Yeah, baby, I’m going to pay you.”
Jason’s nails dig into his own flesh as he takes in a slow breath through his nose. He’ll do it. As long as he gets paid. Because that’s the only thing that matters.
His ma and him have always needed money but not like this. Something went wrong with their food stamps last month so they need to make it one more week. There’s no more food in the house, absolutely none. His ma let him eat the rest of a pack of gum they had. She said she didn’t need any but she told him not to take the trash out when he left. Then the apartment’s water got turned off two days ago.
He told his ma that he was going to the library. Now he’s here, pulling into the parking lot of a motel with a stranger.
And he’s still so hungry.
“Come on, kid, let’s go.” Jason jumps as the man opens his door. “Out you get.”
Jason’s feet aren’t his own as he follows the man to one of the rooms on the second floor. He watches him pull the key out of his pocket. He must have already bought the room. Jason wonders if he’s done this before. Seems like he has. Jason’s not sure if he feels better or worse about that.
The door locks behind them and in the silence, Jason’s stomach rumbles. The man looks over at him, smile growing wider. He cups Jason’s chin and thumbs over his cheekbone.
“Hungry, baby? Don’t worry, I’ll fill you up.” Then he leans down and kisses him.
The jolt that runs through Jason’s body is so strong it hurts. His heart immediately kicks into high gear, racing fast enough that he thinks he might be sick. It pounds in his ear, nearly drowning out the wet sounds between them and the rustle of his clothes as the man reaches under Jason’s shirt.
“Wait, wait,” Jason mumbles, pushing at the man’s shoulders.
The man backs up but for the first time, he looks angry. Jason tries not to cower against the door. “What?” he barks.
“I…” Jason’s stomach feels practically hollow at this point. “I need the money first. Before we do anything.”
The man raises an eyebrow. “That’s not how these things go, boy.”
The door handle digs into Jason’s back. He could leave. He could just leave. But no one else would pay an eleven-year-old this kind of money. He’s too young to work legally and he’s too inexperienced for anything else. This is the only place where inexperience is better. But he’s not leaving here without that cash.
“I need the money first,” Jason repeats, voice steadier than he feels. “I want, um,” He hasn’t really thought this through. He should have asked the girls what their rates were. He throws out the first number he can think of. “500 dollars!” He winces as soon as it comes out of his mouth. That’s too much. Way too much. It’s so much he almost feels selfish asking for it.
The man scoffs. “No,” he states, like Jason is a toddler.
“Um—”
Jason’s stomach twists as the man rolls his eyes. “Look, boy, I could go somewhere else. I thought you wanted to do this. Don’t waste my time. How much do you really think you’re worth?” Jason stares back at him. He doesn’t know how to answer that question. He watches as the man runs his tongue against his teeth and then says, “50 dollars.”
“200,” Jason whispers.
Displeasure radiates off the man. “75. That’s as high as I’m willing to go. Don’t be stupid, boy.”
“100. I’m—” Jason swallows thickly. “I’m a virgin. That’s worth more.”
The man considers him for a moment. His eyes drag across Jason’s body. “Alright, you win. 100.” He goes back to smiling and slides a thin black wallet out of his back pocket. He pulls out a single bill, a perfect crisp 100-dollar note.
Jason takes it and shoves it in his jacket, immediately crumpling it under his greedy fingers. Relief and pride ache through him. This is more money than he’s ever held in his life. More money than he could have gotten anywhere else. More money than he expected to get tonight. This could buy him and his ma anything they wanted at the grocery store. To him, in this moment, it’s a life-changing amount of money.
At the time, he believes the man. He did win. He got what he wanted.
Well, by the time it’s finished, they both got what they wanted, didn’t they?
Later, much later, Jason will remember the stars in his eyes as he saw that 100-dollar bill. He’ll remember how surprised and delighted he was to get that instead of what he expected, what he was used to. In his world, a sum of money like that needs to be split up between fives and tens and maybe twenties. And then, only then, years later, will some doubt creep in. The man’s wallet had been sleek, nearly flat in its elegance. There couldn’t have been many bills inside without bulging. If he was only willing to pay $75 for the night, then why wasn’t he carrying around the change? And when Jason feels sick at the train of thought he’s going down, he reminds himself that he was the one who made out in the end. He should feel good about that.
By the time Jason steals the wrong pair of tires, he sells his virginity four more times. He never does end up raising the price. It still ends up being the most money he has ever had at one time, until it isn’t.