Chapter Text
December 26, 2023
It was freezing outside, but Beomgyu still preferred the cold over the warmth and noise inside the house.
Getting together at Yeonjun's place to celebrate Christmas had been their tradition for years. Ever since they started college, though, what used to be a small gathering had turned into a crowded party filled with friends and acquaintances.
It was half past eleven. The night had grown even colder. Beomgyu pulled his hood over his head and shoved his hands into his pockets. Unlike the loud music and chatter coming from inside, the night itself was quiet.
The front door creaked open.
He turned around to find Soobin stumbling onto the porch, swaying slightly as he walked. Judging by the flushed cheeks and half-lidded eyes, he was completely drunk.
"Gyuu..."
Beomgyu couldn't help smiling. Somehow, he looked even cuter than usual. "You're already drunk?"
Soobin nodded before plopping down onto the cold ground.
"Why are you sitting out here?" Beomgyu walked toward him. "You'll catch a cold. Go back inside."
Soobin pouted, brushing the hair away from his face. "I wanted to go back to the dorm and sleep until tomorrow evening..." he mumbled. "But I'm so dizzy. I can't even walk."
Beomgyu laughed softly.
"Hey..." Soobin whined. "Don't laugh at me."
Still smiling, Beomgyu held out a hand. "Come on. I'll take you to your dorm."
-
The entire walk was a disaster. Soobin kept stumbling every few steps, nearly collapsing into the snow before Beomgyu caught him again.
"Seriously," Beomgyu sighed, "if I had a car, I wouldn't have to drag you all the way back to your dorm."
Soobin cracked one eye open. "As if you could afford one."
Then he closed his eyes again and rested his head against Beomgyu's shoulder.
"Says the guy who can't even afford an ice cream."
After what felt like forever, they finally reached the dorm.
A walk that should have taken twenty minutes had stretched into almost fifty.
Beomgyu helped him into his room and gently eased him onto the bed.
He was completely out of it now, lips slightly parted as he drifted toward sleep.
Beomgyu shook his head and turned to leave.
Before he could take a step, Soobin grabbed his sleeve. "...Gyu."
Beomgyu leaned closer. "Hm? What is it?"
Soobin tightened his grip, gently pulling him closer. "You treat me so well," he murmured with a sleepy little laugh, "it almost makes me wish I had a boyfriend."
The words hit Beomgyu like a punch to the gut. For a long moment, he only stared at him, trying to process what he'd just heard.
i could be your boyfriend.
The thought came so naturally that it nearly slipped out.
Soobin was drunk. He was rambling. Even if Beomgyu had said it right then and there, Soobin probably wouldn't remember any of it in the morning. By tomorrow, Beomgyu would be the only one left to pick up the shattered pieces of his own heart.
So he said nothing.
Without another word, Beomgyu gently slipped his sleeve from Soobin's grasp.
At that moment, all Beomgyu wanted was the quiet comfort of his home... and the warmth of his own bed.
January 17, 2024
It had been twenty-two days since Soobin, completely drunk, told Beomgyu that the way he treated him almost made him wish he had a boyfriend.
Beomgyu hadn't slept properly ever since.
Soobin didn't even remember how he'd made it back to his dorm that night. That was just how he was whenever he drank too much. He'd wake up the next morning with nothing but a pounding headache and little to no memory of the night before.
Beomgyu knew that better than anyone. Which meant he knew Soobin wasn't lying. He genuinely didn't remember saying any of it.
Beomgyu shook his head, pushing thoughts of Soobin aside for later. He looked down at the thick textbook lying open in front of him and let out a sigh. He had an important exam tomorrow, yet he hadn't managed to study a single word.
"What are you thinking about so deeply that you can't even look at your book?" Soobin's voice came in a quiet murmur as he raised an eyebrow.
Since they were both taking the same winter course, they'd come straight to the library after class to prepare for the exam the next day. They'd been there for about two hours. Soobin had been doing well, but apparently he'd noticed how distracted Beomgyu was.
Beomgyu shook his head. "It's nothing."
His eyes drifted to the textbook and notes spread across the table in front of Soobin.
Soobin frowned. "If it's distracting you so much that you can't even focus on your book, then it's not nothing."
He closed his book and looked Beomgyu straight in the eye. "Tell me. What's wrong?"
Soobin really wasn't going to let this go, was he?
Stubborn
Beomgyu thought to himself.
He let out a quiet breath and leaned back in his chair. "Are you worried about me?" He raised an eyebrow.
Soobin stared at him with a blank expression, as if he'd just said the dumbest thing imaginable. "Obviously."
Beomgyu let out another sigh and rolled his eyes. "My future, my studies, college, my family, my friends... I don't know. Everything. I'm thinking about everything, and I feel like my brain's about to explode."
In reality, there was only one thing on his mind.
Soobin.
But Soobin didn't need to know that.
Soobin nodded and fell silent for a few minutes, seemingly lost in thought. Then, as if he'd just remembered something, he looked back at Beomgyu. "But..." He raised an eyebrow. "Why your friends?"
No. Apparently, Soobin really wasn't going to let this go.
Beomgyu raised an eyebrow back. "Because I love them and think about them all the time."
Now it was Soobin's turn to roll his eyes. He opened his book again and picked up his pen. "I don't think loving your friends is gonna help you answer tomorrow's exam questions. So how about you get your shit together and study?"
Damn. He had a point.
January 27, 2024
It was Saturday, and Yeonjun had invited everyone over for dinner. It had been almost a month since they'd all gotten together like this.
Taehyun had complained at first, saying he didn't feel like coming, but after a few threats from Yeonjun, he'd eventually given in.
Now they were gathered around the dining table, laughing over Huening Kai's terrible jokes as they ate dinner.
Yeonjun wiped the tears from the corners of his eyes and shoved another bite of food into his mouth.
That was when he suddenly choked. His entire face turned bright red.
Everyone burst into laughter all over again.
"W-Water!" Still coughing, Yeonjun pointed frantically at the pitcher on the table while repeatedly punching Soobin's arm beside him.
Trying not to laugh, Soobin quickly filled a glass with water and handed it to him.
"You're so stingy, hyung," Beomgyu teased once everyone had calmed down a little, throwing an arm around Yeonjun's shoulders. "You invited us over for dinner, but you're shoving food into your mouth like you're worried we'll eat more than you."
Huening Kai started laughing again while he collapsed against Taehyun. "Seriously, hyung, he's right. You stuffed so much food into your mouth I thought you were actually gonna choke."
Soobin let out a quiet laugh. "Come on, don't tease him so much. For once, the food actually tastes good."
"See? Soobin gets it!" Yeonjun pointed at Soobin, then dramatically grabbed both of his hands. "You're the only one who appreciates all my hard work!"
Then he shot the other three a glare. "These idiots are the most ungrateful people on earth. I spent all that time cooking for you, and this is how you repay me? By calling me stingy?"
Taehyun immediately raised both hands in surrender. "I didn't say it." Without missing a beat, he pointed at Beomgyu. "He did."
Beomgyu placed a hand over his chest in mock offense. "So now I'm the bad guy?"
Soobin looked at him and let out a quiet laugh. His dimples appeared.
Oh not now.
This was not the time for Soobin to make Beomgyu's heart skip a beat.
-
Later that night, they were sprawled across the couches in front of the TV, eating snacks as they watched a movie.
Yeonjun had picked a romance. Everything was moving at such a slow, gentle pace that everyone was starting to get sleepy.
Beomgyu had his head resting on Soobin's lap while Soobin absentmindedly played with his hair. He was only moments away from falling asleep. Soobin's hands were warm, and every gentle stroke through his hair pulled him closer to sleep.
Soobin let out a quiet chuckle and leaned down to get a better look at his face. "Are you actually falling asleep?" he whispered, careful not to disturb others.
"Can you blame me?" Beomgyu mumbled sleepily. "This movie's so slow and cheesy that it's putting me to sleep. Now I get why I've never liked romance movies."
At that exact moment, Huening Kai got to his feet, walked over to the TV, and unplugged it from the wall.
Yeonjun stared at him with wide eyes. "Have you lost your mind?"
Kai planted a hand on his hip and rolled his eyes. "Please never pick a movie again."
Looking thoroughly offended, Yeonjun leaned back against the couch and shot Kai a glare.
Kai rolled his eyes again. "Just look." He pointed toward Taehyun. "He's been asleep since the first ten minutes."
Everyone turned to look.
Taehyun was fast asleep, his head resting against the couch, his mouth hanging slightly open.
Yeonjun burst out laughing. He immediately pulled out his phone. "I'm posting this on my story." A mischievous grin spread across his face. "And I'm tagging his crush."
Soobin laughed. The movement made Beomgyu's head, still resting on his lap, bounce slightly. "You're evil, Yeonjun hyung."
Yeonjun stuck his tongue out playfully.
Kai shook his head. "You guys are like a bunch of seventy year olds. I'm losing brain cells just looking at you." He clapped his hands together. "Come on. Let's do something fun."
Beomgyu lifted his head from Soobin's lap and sat up straight. Soobin's hand slowly slipped out of his hair and came to rest in his own lap. For a brief moment, Beomgyu regretted sitting up, but he quickly pushed the thought aside. "Like what?" he asked, looking at Kai. "making out for fun?"
Kai shrugged. "Sounds interesting, but no thanks." He glanced at Yeonjun. "I'm not kissing an old man's lips."
Yeonjun finally looked up from his phone and raised an eyebrow. "What makes you think I'd kiss someone with a pea-sized brain?" He scoffed. "Please. I have standards."
Taehyun, who everyone had assumed was asleep, let out a sigh, his eyes still closed. "Just get a room."
Everyone turned to look at Taehyun.
A brief silence fell over the room.
Kai blinked. "I thought you were asleep."
Taehyun, without opening his eyes, leaned further back into the couch. "I was trying to be."
Yeonjun shook his head, got to his feet and headed for the kitchen. Less than a minute later, he came back carrying five glasses and a bottle of wine. "This is the most expensive wine I have in my apartment, and I still don't know why I'm letting you idiots drink it."
"Obviously." Beomgyu flashed him a mischievous grin. "Because you love us."
Yeonjun smiled, letting out a soft laugh. "Yeah. That's exactly why." He set the bottle of wine and the glasses down on the coffee table. "Come on. Hurry up and let's drink!"
The five of them gathered around the coffee table and sat down on the floor, all eyes on Yeonjun. A smirk spread across his face as he raised an eyebrow. "How about we play a game while we drink?"
Soobin pursed his lips. "What kind of game?"
"Truth or Drink?" Yeonjun said, a grin spreading across his face.
"You either answer the question honestly..." He pointed at the bottle. "...or you drink."
Kai immediately raised his hand.
"I'm in."
"So am I," Soobin said with a small smile.
Taehyun sighed. "I already regret coming."
Beomgyu chuckled. "Too late. You're playing."
Taehyun grumbled under his breath and grimaced before finally giving in.
"Fine." Yeonjun reached for the bottle. "Since I'm the oldest, I'll go first."
Kai smirked. "Glad to see you've finally accepted your age."
Yeonjun poured some wine into a glass and looked over at Kai. "Alright, smartass." A smirk tugged at his lips. "You answer the first question."
Kai groaned and threw his head back. "Fine. Ask."
Yeonjun smirked. "When was the last time you took a shower?"
"Today" Kai answered without missing a beat.
"Liar" Taehyun said flatly.
Beomgyu immediately burst into laughter, practically collapsing against Soobin.
"I'm not lying! I literally showered today!" Kai raised his voice.
Taehyun shook his head. "I swear the last time you washed your hair was a week ago."
Kai rolled his eyes before turning to Taehyun. "Fine. Since you're so determined to tell nothing but the truth tonight..." He pointed a finger at him. "You answer the next question."
Kai looked at Taehyun with a smug grin. "Do you even know how to smile?"
"That's actually a good question," Beomgyu said with a laugh.
Yeonjun nodded in agreement. "I've been wondering the same thing."
Without saying a word, Taehyun picked up his glass and took a sip of wine.
Kai's eyes widened. "Wait... are you drinking because you don't know how?"
Taehyun looked at him with the same blank expression. "...No." He took another sip. "I'm drinking because your question is stupid."
Soobin and Beomgyu were practically on the floor, laughing so hard they could barely breathe.
Meanwhile, Kai was still staring at Taehyun in complete disbelief.
Yeonjun reached over and gave Taehyun's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "I just hope your crush never finds out about this."
Taehyun brushed Yeonjun's hand off his shoulder. "As long as you stop posting photos and videos of me, no one will find out."
"Fair point." Yeonjun shrugged.
Without missing a beat, Taehyun turned to Soobin. "Alright, Choi Soobin. Your turn."
Soobin straightened up. "Go ahead."
Taehyun looked him dead in the eye. "Have you ever said no to anyone?"
Silence.
Beomgyu let out a laugh. "Wow another good question."
"I don't think he has." Kai teased.
Soobin frowned. "Of course I have."
"Really?" Yeonjun raised an eyebrow. "Name one time."
Soobin opened his mouth... Then closed it again.
"..."
"...Give me a second."
Kai burst into laughter. "Oh my God. He actually can't think of one."
Soobin looked genuinely deep in thought. "...I know there was one."
"When?" Kai pressed.
Soobin let out a sigh. "I'd rather drink than answer your stupid questions."
He tipped his glass back and finished the wine in one go.
Beomgyu chuckled softly. Maybe it was a little mean of him, but he loved seeing Soobin get teased like this. He always looked so much cuter whenever he was flustered. His cheeks and the tips of his ears would turn the prettiest shade of pink.
Yeonjun laughed. "I wasn't expecting anything else from you, Choi Soobin."
Soobin rolled his eyes. "Whatever."
His gaze swept across the other four before finally settling on Beomgyu. "Alright, Beomgyu. Your turn."
A wide grin spread across Beomgyu's face. "I'm all ears."
"Have you ever accidentally texted the wrong person?"
Beomgyu shrugged. "No." He tilted his head "...Not yet." A small grin spread across his face. "But I might."
Soobin laughed and shook his head. "Yeah, I can totally see you doing that."
They kept playing for a while longer, taking turns asking questions and drinking until the bottle was completely empty.
None of them were actually drunk. Just pleasantly buzzed. Their minds felt lighter, and laughter came more easily. Even Taehyun found himself laughing every now and then.
After tidying up the coffee table a little, Yeonjun clapped his hands together. "Alright, kiddos." He pointed down the hallway. "Bedtime."
Yeonjun's house was big enough that whenever they had sleepovers, each of them practically ended up with their own room.
Since Taehyun was such a light sleeper, he always took one of the guest rooms for himself.
Kai, on the other hand, insisted that Yeonjun's house was haunted and somehow managed to force his way into Yeonjun's room every single time.
Which, naturally... left the last room for Soobin and Beomgyu.
After saying goodnight to each other, everyone headed off to their own rooms.
The moment Beomgyu walked into theirs, he threw himself onto the bed and let out a long sigh.
Soobin chuckled softly. Before climbing into bed, he slipped off the hoodie he'd been wearing over his T-shirt and hung it on a hanger.
"Ugh... I'm exhausted." Beomgyu laughed quietly after saying it. "I'm exhausted from laughing. It's been so long since I've laughed that hard." He turned his head to look at Soobin.
Soobin met his gaze. A small smile tugged at his lips before he leaned over and wrapped an arm around Beomgyu in a gentle side hug. "Mm... me too."
Soobin rested his head against Beomgyu's and took in the scent of his hair. "Did you change your shampoo?"
Beomgyu turned his head slightly so he could look at him and gave a small nod. "Mhm. You don't like it?"
Soobin shook his head. "No, it's not that." He paused. "I just got used to the old one on you." Another small pause. "It suited you better."
Beomgyu smiled to himself and turned his gaze back to the ceiling. "Okay. Then I'll keep using the old one."
Beomgyu would've stopped time itself if Soobin had asked him to. Switching back to his old shampoo was hardly a sacrifice.