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Corporal Ditto peered down at the small natborn, who looked to be Ardennian, standing on the other side of their public front desk for the Coruscant Guard and blinked in confusion for a moment. As a first generation clone and having been stationed on Coruscant since the start of the war - he thought couldn't be surprised anymore. However, it seemed that there was always a way Coruscant continued to manage to do so.
"Can I help you, ma'am?" he asked carefully, trying to look at her face half-hidden behind the massive box she was carrying. It was almost bigger than she was.
"Oh yes, young man," she said brightly. "I'm here to deliver this to your delightful Commander Fox."
"Err," Ditto started as he tried to process 'delightful' in the same sentence as his Commander, and feeling like he was completely on the back foot, "can I ask what's in the box, ma'am?"
She beamed at him, hefting the box up onto the desk next to him. Ditto eyed the box warily, there was something scrawled on the side in a spidery font in thick black marker pen. The door scanner hadn't indicated an incendiary device, but one could never be too careful.
"Socks and hats, dear," she said cheerily. "You see, the ladies and I normally make hats for the gorgeous newborns at Lina Soh Hospital - but we fancied a bit of a challenge recently. And your fine young Commander happened to pass us when we were playing Rianza, and he stopped to get a pebble out of his boot. Those pebbles on Level 1875 are so irritating once they get in your shoes, I'm surprised he waited for as long as he did before removing it."
Ditto watched in bewilderment as the Ardennian continued without apparently taking a breath.
"And Cato saw that the poor man had a hole in one of his socks. She's recently got new glasses you see, and now she's got better vision than the rest of us!
Well, that won't do, a fine soldier like him not having comfortable feet, and my husband was a soldier back when he was still alive, you see. I used to make him socks all the time, what with how uncomfortable those boots are they provide you."
Ditto reached down to press the hidden alert button, feeling completely out of his depth. Maybe Sergeant Mal was around today? The lady rapped her knuckles on the side of the box.
"So, the ladies and I concluded that we'd make some for you boys, because if the Commander of your wonderful Guardsmen has holes in his socks, we suspected that the rest of you wouldn't be far behind.
And then as T'da can't quite get the heels right on her socks, she decided she'd make some hats instead. We've used some nice wool from Askaj that is thin but very warm, so Attiera thinks it should fit under those helmets of yours."
"Thank you, ma'am," Ditto managed to squeeze in, as the lady finally took a breath. The amount in the box probably wouldn't be enough for all of the men, but the shinies and Commander Fox would definitely benefit from having one. "That is very kind of you all."
She smiled, reaching into one of her many pockets and rummaging around for a moment. She muttered to herself as she did so, stuffing a crumpled tissue that fell out into a different pocket before making a triumphant sound. The Ardennian pulled out a comm far larger than Ditto had seen before, perched her glasses on her nose and squinted down at the comm.
"Cato, can you bring the speeder around, my lovely?" she said loudly into the comm.
Ditto looked up in alarm as a speeder pulled in front of the building, the exhaust belching out smoke. It was of course at this moment that Ditto's backup arrived, and to his horror in the form of Commander Fox himself.
The lady glanced up at the newcomer and beamed. Ditto witnessed the helmet tilt of a Command-class brother blanching underneath it.
"Commander Fox! How wonderful to see you here, young man! I was just talking to this splendid trooper of yours..."
She trailed off, looking pointedly at Ditto. Ditto cleared his throat awkwardly.
"Err, Corporal Ditto, ma'am."
"- Corporal Ditto, about these hats and socks that the ladies and I have made for your wonderful men.
He confirmed that they would be very much appreciated-"
Ditto looked at his Commander in blind panic, hoping that the Commander could read the denial in his visor.
"-and so Cato and Dahna are just grabbing the rest of the boxes. We think we've made enough for all of you - in your battalion colours of course, my husband always said his superiors were ridiculously anal about that sort of thing. As if comfort shouldn't be the primary consideration for brave men putting their lives on the line! Really! Though of course, we'd be happy to make them in other colours."
Ditto was impressed by how remarkably quickly the Commander recovered.
"Thank you, Mrs Betal, this will be a wonderful morale boost for the men," he said sincerely, bending forward slightly at the waist.
She flapped at him. "Call me Kua, please. And oh, Commander, it is a pleasure to be able to support our fine young men working hard to protect us!"
The door opened then, and two more natborns bustled in with boxes piled high in their arms.
"Ladies! Ladies! Thank you, if you could pile them up in front of the desk, I'm sure the lovely soldier here will be able to get them to their new owners."
A cacophony of noise filled the waiting area as the three of them chatted, and Ditto watched as his poor Commander seemed to be peppered from all sides with questions. The man gainly took it all in his stride, leaving the ladies nattering happily.
Ditto took the opportunity to lift the lid of one of the boxes on his desk. The box was stuffed to the brim with bundles of bright red, soft looking items. Ditto prodded a bundle, and yup - soft. He glanced up to realise that Commander Fox was looking at him, and Ditto snatched his hand quickly out of the box. His helmet tilt looked almost fond?
A little jingly alarm went off, and Mrs Betal spent several moments patting down her pockets until she retrieved the large comm device from the depths of her clothes.
"Oh goodness me! Look at the time!" she exclaimed. "I'm afraid we must be leaving, Commander. We mustn't be late for Sabacc night at Jo's and I'm sure there was an awful collision or something this morning the way we normally go, so we'll have to take a different route."
Commander Fox nodded, gesturing towards the door with a polite tilt of his helmet.
"We wouldn't want to keep you ladies from such an important appointment in your calendars," he said without a drop of sarcasm. "Do you require a lift?"
Mrs Betal and her friends all flapped their hands dismissively. "Oh no, thank you, Commander," Mrs Betal friend said brightly. "Our speeder has never let us down."
Ditto eyed the speeder resting at a jaunty angle on the platform outside. He decided not to comment. His Commander had no such qualms, however.
"Are you sure, ladies?" he asked dubiously. "It's looking in need of a service..."
"Nonsense!" the Twi'leki lady exclaimed, sweeping her lekku away from her face. "I keep her in prime running condition - my wife was a mechanic you know."
His Commander capitulated, his gloved hands raised in surrender as he chuckled.
"Alright, alright. Just drive safely, okay?"
He received a round of tutting. "You worry too much, young man," Mrs Betal said, herding her companions towards the door.
As she pushed the door open, Mrs Betal called over her shoulder. "Oh, and Commander?"
Commander Fox straightened. "Yes, ma'am?"
"Tell that man of yours that he needs to feed you up a bit, he'll get a papercut from you otherwise, dear."
Ditto doesn't think he'd ever heard his commanding officer sound flustered.
"I-, pardon, ma'am?"
"Whichever of these fine young men is your partner, he needs to remind you to eat whenever you're caught up with work."
Ditto couldn't help his burst of laughter and muted his helmet only a fraction too slow. Commander Fox’s head turned only marginally in his direction, and Ditto knew he was going to be cleaning up massiff shit for the next week.
"I'll… pass on the message, Mrs Betal," the Commander murmured awkwardly.
"Good lad! Oh, and let us know whether any of those wonderful men out there fighting on other planets would be interested in some hats and socks. Attiera was hoping to try some other colour combinations out next week."
"That's a very considerate offer. I will ask my fellow Commanders, Mrs Betal."
"Kua!" Mrs Betal winked - winked! - at Commander Fox. "Well, you know where to find us, Commander. Good day, gentlemen."
And with that, the three ladies departed - the smoking speeder leaving a trail in its wake. Ditto looked at his Commander, the tilt of his helmet was thoughtful, if a little stunned.
"Sir?"
The Commander sighed and turned back towards him. "Don't ask, Corporal."
"She seemed… nice, sir."
"She's a retired smuggler, and she's a damn menace."
"That's high praise from you, sir," said Ditto around a grin thankfully hidden by his helmet.
Ditto's Commander chuckled. "I'll take these boxes. As you were, Corporal."
The hat and socks were ridiculously, wonderfully, soft. Ditto didn't want to ever take them off.