Chapter Text
The school bell rings as you usher your class down the hallway and to the parent pick-up area at the front of King County Elementary. The sunshine spills through the grey double doors as soon as they open, making you squint against the light.
“Alright, kids, you know the drill. Line up on the brick wall until you hear your name called,” you holler to the kids anxiously awaiting their parents’ arrival. You and a few other teachers call out students' names as you see their folks pull up or walk over to the fence. When you look over and see Lori walking up, you smile and lift your hand in a wave. She grins and nods at you in greeting.
“Carl, your mama’s here,” you say to the dark-haired boy. His head whips up when he hears his name called and looks around you to see Lori.
He gathers his things and rushes over to his mom, cheerfully yelling goodbye to you as he passes. As soon as he stops in front of her, you can see his mouth moving a mile a minute, gesturing to a couple of other boys speaking to their parents. He bounces on his toes and looks up at her with large puppy dog eyes until she sighs and nods her head. Carl beams up at her before chasing the other boys over to the playground.
“Just 15 minutes, Carl, then we gotta go to the pharmacy before it closes.” She yells after him. You snicker at the thumbs up the boy gives his mom, not even bothering to turn around from his friends.
“Shelley, you got this?” You ask your coworker, nodding towards the last few kids lingering by the wall. She smiles at you and nods, so you step away from the group and make your way over to Lori.
“You wanna know what Shane said to me this morning?” You say leaning against the fence she is standing at, not even bothering with a greeting. She looks over at you, not at all surprised by the lack of hello, and cocks her perfectly filled-in eyebrow. “He was huffin’ and puffin’ about me not turning the damn lights off again.” You roll your eyes, a small smirk crossing your lips.
Lori laughs and shakes her head. “He’s goin’ on about that again?”
You throw your hands up and shoot her an annoyed look. “Right?! That’s exactly what I said. Told him he sounds just like dad, always bitchin’ about the damn power bill.”
You scrunch your eyebrows together, grab your belt, and square your shoulders. “See, you’ve been hearin’ this all your damn life, and you are still too damn stupid to learn how to turn off a switch?” You lower your voice, mocking your big brother.
Lori’s laughter chimes through the air at your impression, and you join in, turning away to watch the last of your students run towards their parents’ cars. Both of you dissolve into quiet chuckles after a moment, and Lori responds. “What did you say to that?”
You snort and tuck some hair behind your ear. “Said if he’s too fuckin’ poor to pay the power bill, maybe he needs to move back in with mama and daddy.”
Lori huffs out a small laugh, her eyes watching Carl as he swings on the monkey bars. Her smile slowly falls, and her fingers twist the thin watch circling her wrist.
“Alright, spill,” you say, eyes still tracking the parking lot. “I know that look and the creepy ass silence that follows.”
Lori sighs, dropping her chin before lifting it and pursing her lips. “We had a fight this mornin’ and it got ugly.” A small, sad smile crosses her face as she moves her head back and forth. “Got hurtful.”
You nod your head and glance over at her briefly. “‘M sorry, Lor. Men can be such assholes.”
“If we’re bein’ honest, though, Honey, he wasn’t the asshole.” Her voice catches and she quietly clears her throat to try to play it off. “You- you know when men try to be so reasonable and it just pisses you off even more?” She finally meets your eyes, desperately searching for solace in you.
You nod your head. “Boy, do I.”
“Like, I just wish sometimes he would have it out with me and blow up. Tell me I’m a bitch if that’s what I’m bein’.” She takes a deep breath and slowly lets it out. “Instead, he’s just so-” Lori trails off, waving her hands in front of her.
“I mean, you could always pick a fight with Shane if y’want someone to blow up in your face,” you joke, nudging her side with your elbow. She smiles, but you can still see the turmoil hidden in her eyes. “Don’t beat yourself up, sweetie. It ain’t easy when ya feel like you’re the only one who cares enough to fight. When they just sit there and take it, it makes ya wonder if they’re even listenin’ to what you’re sayin’.” You pull her hand away from her watch and hold it in yours. “Listen, Rick is a wonderful man. You know it, I know it, hell, all of King County knows it. But sometimes it feels like he’s so caught up in his own thoughts that he ain’t got a damn clue what’s goin’ on around him.”
Lori’s eyes shine with tears and she nods her head a little. She takes a shaky breath, squeezing your hand tighter. “Lately, I’ve been asking myself if I still love him.” She speaks quietly, seeming almost ashamed to admit her thoughts.
“Well, do you?” You ask, raising an eyebrow. As much as you love Lori and will always have her back, a small part of you despises her for how she treats Rick. You have known the man basically all your life. He and Shane have been inseparable since kindergarten, so he has been coming around since you were in diapers. Rick Grimes was a constant rock in your life. He was always there to pick you up when you fell off your bike, to take you to find your brother a birthday gift, or even to help Shane beat up a boy who made you cry. He’s just about as much of a brother to you as Shane is. So, hearing the things Lori says to him during a fight makes part of you resent her.
She stares out at the playground, contemplating your question. “I think the answer is yes.” She finally says. “I guess I’m just tryin’ to remember how that works. I’m startin’ to wonder if the only real problem we have is we got married so young.”
She opens her mouth to continue, but the sound of blaring sirens cuts her off. Everyone standing around the school grounds whips their head toward the cop car speeding through the entrance. You and Lori make your way to the sidewalk by the road, your stomach rolling with nerves. You hold your breath as the tires screech on the hot asphalt and the door flings open.
Your lungs shakily deflate in relief as Shane steps out from behind the door, but your breath catches when the passenger side stays shut. Both of you immediately stop in your tracks, hearts racing as Shane lowers his head and slowly walks to where you’re standing. He stops in front of you both, knuckles white from how hard he’s gripping his belt.
Silence hangs heavy between you all until Lori speaks. “Is he alive?”
‘That’s it?!’ You think to yourself as you glance between her somber expression and Shane’s guilt torn eyes.
Shane clears his throat and shoots you a look before turning his attention back to his partner's wife. “He’s in surgery.”
Your hand grabs Lori’s again as relief hits you like a freight train. Every night, you have the same nightmare that either Rick or Shane is killed in action, and today, seeing that look on your brother’s face, made you think it finally happened.
“How?” You blurt out, voice wobbly.
“Was a radio call that said there was two suspects in a car. But there was a third man. Somebody screwed up.” Shane looks down at his muddy boots and bites his lip. He shakes his head harshly, looking back at Lori. “I screwed up. I didn’t see ‘im in time. Lori, it’s my fault.” He sniffs and you think to yourself that he looks smaller than he ever has.
“I don’t believe that.” She says, turning when she hears feet trampling through the grass.
You look up and see Carl running towards the three of you, a big smile on his face. He is always excited to see his uncle Shane, especially when he brings his patrol car. Your chest tightens, and you force a smile, seeing Lori do the same out of the corner of your eye.
“What do I say?” She mumbles, hand pressing tightly to her chest, smile falling from her lips. “How do I tell my son his father’s been shot?”
“You don’t have to do it alone, Lor,” you say, gripping her hand like a lifeline. Shane puts his arm around her shoulders and holds on to her as well.
She nods once before pulling out of your grips and quickly moving to her son's side. You both silently watch as she kneels on the ground and speaks in a low voice to Carl.
Glancing up at your big brother, you reach out to hold onto his arm. His hand clasps around yours on his bicep, and you feel his fingers tremble against yours. Tears well in your eyes as you watch Carl break down, his small face crumpling as his mother wipes away a tear that had fallen. He nods a few times, obviously trying to be brave, and Lori pulls him into a hug.
Shane sniffles beside you and removes his hand from yours to discreetly try and wipe his eyes. Lori and Carl make their way over to you, tear tracks shining on both of their faces, but their heads are held high.
“Can we go see him?” Lori says as she reaches the two of you, voice as calm as a Georgian sunrise.
Shane wipes his mouth, nodding and turning towards his cruiser. “Y’all want a ride or an escort?”
Lori pulls her keys from her purse. “We’ll follow you.” She and Carl turn and walk to their station wagon, their hands tightly gripped together.
You’re left on the sidewalk, standing alone, not knowing if you are welcome to join or if you would be intruding. You decide to give the Grimes family time to themselves, so you start making your way back to the school.
“Honey, where ya goin’?” Shane calls out, one foot already in his car.
“Thought I’d give his family some time with him. Don’t wanna intrude.” Your voice shakes, and you try to swallow the large lump in your throat.
“You are his family, stupid. Get your ass in the car.” Shane huffs, sliding into the driver's seat and slamming the door.
You don’t move from your spot until he starts the cruiser and flicks the lights and sirens on. The sound jolts you into action and you jog to the passenger side, dropping into the fabric seat. Your brother doesn’t even wait for your door to close before he peels away from the curb and races towards the hospital.