Chapter Text
RAKKENSTAN - RAKKENSTAN GOLDENGROUNDS
We are still on Rakkenstan’s Goldengrounds and see a familiar white glove floating in place.
“Hello everyone! I am Mr Glove and I am about to start another season of the Versus Saga! I chose twenty contestants from all sorts of auditions! Some old, and some new to compete for a job at the police station, AND this Saga Trophy to go along with it!” Mr Glove introduced themselves to everyone, and showed off the prizes.
“And I'm Lumi, the co-host, pleased to meet you, the viewers watching.” Lumi waved at the camera.
“Today is also a very special day! As it's been a year ever since the first season of my show was created, it's crazy we are already in the fifth season!” Mr Glove announced their anniversary, and spawned in confetti and party poppers, Mr Glove also held out a party horn to celebrate the occasion.
“Wait, really?” Lumi was surprised.
“Yes really, it's really been a year, and I'm proud, and- Ooo! I sense that they're coming! Here they come now!” Mr Glove grins with pride, before their attention glances at the bus that was coming, which had a lot of Pokémon inside.
The first one to come out of the bus was a Sableye, followed by Spiritomb, Koffing and Zorua.
“I’m telling you amethysts taste like oil, I mean I’ll still eat one, but not my first choice man.” Sableye shrugs, finishing the conversation he had on the ride here.
“Hahahaha, now I know what to shove down your throat next time you piss me off!” Spiritomb snickered; Sableye, instead of being offended or scared, just cackled.
“Heh, hey guys, I’m Koffing, you could say I’m a hidden gem!” Koffing winked at them.
“Uh, you’re no gem, I eat gems and trust me you are not a gem!” Sableye looked at him, feeling weirded out.
“Yeah, get outta our conversation you freak!” Spiritomb glares at him.
“Sheesh, seems like some people aren’t in high spirits, hehehe…” Koffing flew away.
“Oh man, I can’t wait to compete here!” Zorua seemed excited.
Corviknight, Baltoy, Aron, Magnemite and Xatu all came out as well.
“Great to see you again Mr Glove.” Xatu smiles at the Glove.
“And adieu, too!” Mr Glove bowed down, which kind of looked cringe.
Then Darkrai, Lokix, Gothita and Pawniard.
“Finally, that took me long enough! I want payments for my bus trip since the air conditioning sucks!” Gothita fanned herself with money.
“YOU SUCK- Anyway, we're still missing a few people!” Mr Glove yelled aggressively at Gothita and turned back to normal, Froslass frowned when she saw the unnatural behavior.
Archaludon came out chatting with Scolipede.
“Heya!~ I'm back again, hehe hehe…” Scolipede chuckled drunkenly.
“Sad that Xander couldn't compete, but oh well, we'll do it for him!” Archaludon grins.
“Yeah! Hahahahaaaaaa…” Scolipede cross-eyed.
Lastly, Revavroom, Hisuian Sneasel and Drapion all got off the bus, Ralts did too, but she was brutally shoved by Hatenna.
“Move it.” Hatenna didn’t even apologize.
“Ow…” Ralts rubbed her head.
“Hey why are you rude! I HATE RUDE PEOPLE!” Revavroom screamed extremely loudly; Hisuian Sneasel seemed relaxed but Drapion looked annoyed at the sudden outburst.
“Hey man coul- could you please not yell so loud next time, really hurt my ears-“ Drapion told her.
“Oh, right-“ Revavroom frowned.
“Yeah sorry, it was just really uncalled for, I mean I get hating rude people, I do too as the next guy but…That was just too loud.” Drapion told her, looking chill.
“Yeah, you’re right, sorry sorry…” Revavroom looked away awkwardly.
“It’s okay Revavroom; at least you learned from your mistak-“ Hisuian Sneasel began saying.
“I HATE WHEN YOU PATRONIZE-” Revavroom screamed at her face spitting some ink on her.
Mr Glove then interrupted by beginning their speech.
“Welcome twenty contestants to The Third Versus Saga Season! I’m sure you all already know the deal, you’ll stay in this campsite of Rakkenstan Goldengrounds for a couple of weeks and compete in challenges for safety. The losing team gets to choose one of their team members to leave the game and not come back EVER!” Mr Glove grins and recapped everything.
Ralts gulped feeling nervous, Aron rolled his eyes, and Lokix didn’t seem impressed.
“Now my intern Lumi will give you all a piece of paper; don’t open it till you enter the cafeteria, as it’s going to tell you on which table to sit on.” Mr Glove told them.
The Froslass floated towards each player and began handing them all a paper.
“Archie; Vero, it’s good to see you again so soon!” Lumi smiled at the two of them.
“Yeeeeh.” Vero smiled clearly drunk as hell as she grabbed her paper.
“Yeah, same Lumi, and this time I came to win! No second place for me again!” Archie smiled viciously.
“I’ll look forward to it.” Lumi winked, handing him and other players the papers.
“Alright, now hurry up and go to the mess hall players.” Mr Glove ordered them.
(RAKKENSTAN - MESS HALL)
Inside the cafeteria many players seemed impressed as it looked like a three star restaurant! Beautiful tables, seats and curtains, the floor wasn’t wooden anymore but ceramic and the kitchen looked clean and well kept.
“Now this is what I call an improvement.” Archaludon grins.
“Thanks, I really worked hard on it.” Lumi smiled, some clapped for her to show appreciation and dedication for her.
Each of the tables had a number and then each player opened their papers and sat down in the tables corresponding their numbers.
“Now, I hope you like where everyone is sitting, because that will be your new team for a while.” Mr Glove grinned, Lumi floated next to them.
(Table 1)
Koffing, Darkrai, Archaludon, Lokix and Xatu all sat down on the first table.
“Greetings new team, how are you all?” Xatu asked kindly.
Koffing burped. “Like a million bucks!”
Xatu showed no reaction to this.
“So this is awkward.” Archaludon rubbed the back of his neck.
“I remember you from last season, Archie, right?” Lokix asked.
“Yeah, and you’re Loren, I know you because you threw a squid at me a few weeks prior, but I guess we’ll be teammates this season, hope you can keep up.” Archie gave a long face for a moment, but he grins right after.
“Psh, I’m a super advanced machine, I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to easily keep up with those dumb idiots for sure.” Lokix side-glanced at the other tables.
“I like your attitude!” Archie crossed his arms.
“Hey there, pretty lady!” Koffing smiled at Darkrai.
“Don’t talk to me with your weird girl talk.” Darkrai said in a very bored and monotone voice.
“Hmmm, hard to get huh, daddy Wade knows da way~” Koffing grins and winked at her.
Darkrai showed absolutely no reaction, she just seemed very bored.
(Table 2)
Magnemite, Ralts, Hatenna, Sableye and Spiritomb all sat on a table.
“So this is our team, huh, we'll have to make do with what we got.” Magnemite analyzed everyone.
“Well, it seems interesting, at least, for me.” Ralts said softly, she had a smile on her face.
Sableye and Spiritomb were talking to each other and snickering at some stupid inside joke they both had.
“This team is trash.” Hatenna said frowning; she seemed annoyed.
(Table 3)
Zorua, Gothita, Scolipede, Hisuian Sneasel and Revavroom were all in this table.
“This team is weird, and therefore, I say, I hate it!” Revavroom yells out.
“Come on Revavroomy, give it some more time and maybe it will grow on you.” Hisuian Sneasel smiled calmly.
“I hate you!” Revavroom got all up in Sneasel’s face again.
“Sheesh, someone is gonna be an early boot, am I right?” Gothita whispered to Zorua who snickered mischievously.
“Whaaaaat, come on man, don’t vote me out, the game just started, hehehehe boats…” Scolipede giggled as she kept drinking her beer bottle.
Zorua and Gothita just glanced at each other, both of them were confused, but they shrugged it off.
(Table 4)
Pawniard, Corviknight, Baltoy, Aron and Drapion were all in the final table.
“This team doesn’t seem too bad? I like us all to work together and reach victory.” Corviknight spoke; his monotone voice sounding very serious.
“K.” Aron boredly said, glancing away.
“Sure, I’d love to help the team!” Pawniard smiled.
“Same here; together we will all reach far.” Baltoy told them.
“Yeah man, I’m down.” Drapion just shrugged.
(RAKKENSTAN - MESS HALL)
“Alright, now that everyone got to meet each other, I'll give you guys team names based on intense names, starting off, Table one, your team name is Terrific Tyrants!” Mr Glove told them.
“A strong name for a strong team.” Archaludon seemed satisfied; Lokix crossed his arms and nodded.
“Table two will be Vile Invaders!” Mr Glove told them.
“I see…” Magnemite accepted the team name, Spiritomb grins.
“Lameeeee.” Sableye glanced away, and Hatenna glanced with a mad and bored expression.
“I kind of like it, it's like if we're troops invading a warehouse.” Ralts politely smiled.
“Shut up.” Hatenna aggressively told her.
Ralts submissively nods, not saying a single word.
“Table three is Girly Gallants!” Mr Glove announced.
“Wait, but I’m a guy!” Zorua looked annoyed.
“Cry about it.” Gothita teased him.
“I HATE HAVING A GUY ON AN ALMOST ALL GIRLS TEAM!” Revavroom yelled, Hisuian Sneasel meditated and Scolipede looked drunk af.
“And last but certainly not least, table four, you'll be the Ballistic Braves!” Mr Glove announced.
“Meh.” Aron reacted.
“Sounds fine to me.” Pawniard shrugged.
“Alright now that all the teams got to know each other and form we will go do our first challenge! Follow me, losers!” Mr Glove told them.
Most contestants frowned, and just followed Mr Glove and Lumi.
(RAKKENSTAN - GOLDENGROUNDS)
All the players were standing on the yellow grassy fields, and there were four gigantic canvases set on the area.
“What are these things doing here?” Ralts asked curiously.
“I'll explain! Can I Mr G?” Lumi asked.
“Sure!” Mr Glove smiled at their friend.
Froslass prepared herself to explain.
“Everyone will use these catapults to launch team mates into the canvases and paint it! There is a lot of paint for you all to use, and you can use your creative minds to create something, whether it be an object, or abstract art, your imagination is infinite.” Lumi told the contestants.
“After a 30 minute timer, I'll judge on what your creativity has made, the team with the lowest score will be put up for elimination! But before I start, does anyone have a question?" Mr Glove described the challenge, and asked anyone if they had a question to ask.
“Well actually, I've got a question about the safety hazards, is it safe?” Hisuian Sneasel questioned.
“I don't know and I don't care! All that matters is that YOUR creativity is infinite!" Mr Glove cross-eyed and told her.
“I see…” Hisuian Sneasel looked conflicted.
“The challenge begins in three, two, one, now!” Froslass starts to countdown and declares that the challenge has begun.
(VS SAGA S3 INTRO)
(Terrific Tyrants)
“Alright everyone, so I’ll be the one that launches all of you; there is no way that catapult is going to launch my heavy self far enough to reach the canvas.” Archaludon told the team.
“Makes sense.” Lokix told him.
“What should we paint?” Asked Xatu.
“Uhhh, I don’t know, just cover yourself in a color and let’s learn as we go.” Archaludon told them.
Lokix covered himself in green, Xatu in yellow, Koffing in brown and Darkrai in black.
“Hehe I picked brown cause it’s the color of poo.” Koffing joked as a sus sound effect played.
Lokix looked very annoyed, Xatu frowned, Archaludon raised an eyebrow and Darkrai looked bored.
“Uhhh, okay then…Now everyone, get in, get in! I’m gonna go on a launching frenzy!” Archaludon cheered.
Many of them got on the catapult and were launched towards the canvas.
There was nothing but a few splats of paint on them but it was a start.
“Ow.” Darkrai said in her casual monotone voice.
(Vile Invaders)
“I'm leading the challenge, and you better not tell me that I'm not!” Hatenna showed dominance to another.
“I like that idea.” Ralts agreed with her, and she painted herself fully white.
“As long as I get to be gem colored!” Sableye grins, and tries to open a can of paint, however, he couldn't seem to open it due to him being weak.
“Let me try, hehehe…watch this!” Spiritomb grins, before his spirit goes back into the tomb.
Then, some sinister music plays, as it slowly zooms into the tomb, before…
“BOO!” Spiritomb's spirit came out of the tomb.
“AHHHHHHH!” The paint apparently gained sentience and opened it up by itself because of the shock value, signing it as dead.
“Heheheh…got em.” Spiritomb chuckled, and high fived Sableye before Sableye jumped into the paint, making him green with sparkles, while Spiritomb dumped himself in violet paint.
“And what about you magnet for brains?! Are you gonna listen to me?” Hatenna glared at him.
“I mean I guess I am going to have to do that, because the entire team seems to submit.” Magnemite glanced at the three, still analyzing them, but he coated himself in a gold paint.
“As they should!” Hatenna added with a naughty smirk, and then put them into the catapult, and said; “Hasta la Vista bitches!”
Then, she let go of the catapult, launching all of them onto the canvas.
(Ballistic Braves)
“Okay everyone, get ready to get paint!” Corviknight told the team.
“Way ahead of you!” Pawniard smiled and got some yellow paint on him.
“Hey Baltoy, can you pass me the orange paint man?” Drapion asked.
“Sure.” Baltoy gave Drapion the paint and then covered himself in red paint.
Aron didn’t put paint on himself but Corviknight covered him in blue paint.
“Great, now I’m covered in paint.” Aron looked annoyed and sighed.
“Let’s get this painting done!” Pawniard looked determined and got on the catapult.
Corviknight launched him and the small pawn smacked against the canvas.
“Great work Pawniard! Team, let's try to do our best!” Baltoy told them.
(Girly Gallants)
Zorua, Gothita, Scolipede and Hisuian Sneasel were all covered in paint.
“Come on Revavroom! Get covered in paint!” Gothita yelled at her; Hisuian Sneasel was standing next to her accessing the situation.
“I hate being covered in paint!” Revavroom yells.
“Just do it, we need to launch you to the canvas.” Zorua told her frowning while Scolipede was drunk as hell standing next to the catapult.
“I hate being launched at comically gigantic canvases!” Revavroom screams.
“Ugh, this is taking forever!” Gothita complained.
“Yeah, tell me about it…” Zorua frowned.
“Please Revavroom, we need your help, or else we’ll lose the challenge…” Hisuian Sneasel looked calm.
“I hate losing challenges, so fine!” Revavroom got some random paint and got covered as she then quickly got on the catapult and was launched by the drunk Scolipede towards the canvas.
Revavroom smacked against the canvas doing a loud splat of paint.
“I HATE DOING LOUD SPLATS ON A LARGE CANVAS!” Revavroom snarls.
Zorua and Gothita looked annoyed, Hisuian Sneasel frowned, and Scolipede was too drunk to care.
(A few minutes later)
The teams all kept launching and catapulting their own teammates at the canvases attempting to draw some sort of art.
“Time's up! Alright everyone, I will judge the teams now; Vile Invaders, what the hell is this?” Mr Glove looked at a bunch of splats on the canvas.
“It’s well, uhhh...” Ralts didn’t know what to say.
“A beautiful piece of abstract art, one cannot see the image in this beautiful piece of colors by just visualization alone, one must imagine the true meaning of our creation.” Magnemite told Mr Glove.
“Huh, I guess?” Mr Glove squinted looking at it.
“So, do we win?” Sableye asked.
“Uhhh, 1/10, I don’t see anything here…At least the effort is there.” Mr Glove told them.
“Bruh.” Sableye glared.
“This is all your fault Hatenna! You kept just forcing us to be thrown all the time!” Spiritomb snarled at her.
“You shut it!” Hatenna replied angrily.
“Alright, let’s go to the next team.” Mr Glove floated towards the Ballistic Braves.
“So, what did you do?” Mr Glove told them.
“We have created a beach.” Corviknight showed off the canvas; there was a light brown color on the bottom, and a lot of cyan and blues above it.
“I mean, it's better than the trash the team before you made, so it is a 6/10 for me.” Mr Glove told them.
“Yes!” Pawniard cheered.
“Great work team!” Baltoy spinned.
“Whatever.” Aron looked away.
“Okay Girly Gallants, let’s see what you-“ Mr Glove paused looking at the red looking smiling face.
“It took a while for us to begin painting, but look!” Zorua smiled at the canvas, Revavroom rolled her eyes.
“Indeed, we tried our best to paint a happy smiley face for our host.” Gothita smiled at him.
“Indeed, we hope it brings joy and happiness to you.” Hisuian Sneasel smiled.
Mr Glove started to zone out and panic, their breath getting louder and louder, before getting very angry, and yelling out; “ZERO!”
“What?! But why?! It can’t be as bad as whatever those losers made!” Gothita looked pissed off.
“Yeah, this isn’t too bad, it's just a red smiley face!” Zorua frowned at the host.
“I don't care what you say! Your team LOSES! I don’t need to explain myself, thanks for ruining the anniversary!” Mr Glove was extremely pissed, and was still breathing heavily, Froslass was taken aback at their behavior, before Mr Glove floated away.
“Ugh! I hate losing without getting an explanation!” Revavroom yelled out.
“So uh, what about us, do we win?” Archaludon asked, pointing at their team who made a sunflower; it had yellow petals, brown center and green for the stem.
“Huh? Oh, yeah, sure, whatever, you get a 7/10, the challenge is over, I need to go.” Mr Glove glanced at their painting, still being upset, and then went to the host cabinet to rest.
“Yeah!” Everyone in Terrific Tyrants cheered other than Darkrai who didn’t care.
The Girly Gallants looked upset they had lost.
(RAKKENSTAN - ARCHGOLD ELIMINATION CEREMONY)
The Girly Gallants sat on the tree stumps and logs watching the campfire for a while; then, Froslass floated towards the opposite side of the site, and she pulled out a CRT TV.
“Uh…what's that for?” Zorua questioned.
“One second…” Lumi pointed as she connected the wire to a plug.
The CTR started to boot up, and Lumi pressed play on the CTR, starting a VHS tape.
“Bench time, Bench time, it's time for one of you to go! Bench time, Bench time, who'll leave the show? Bench time, Bench time, time to see who goes! Bench time, Bench time, maybe a surprise who knows? WOOOOO!” Mr Glove's elimination theme of JAAPS played on the CTR.
Hisuian Sneasel and Scolipede clapped, Gothita just smiled at the innocent theme, and Zorua just snickers.
“I hate that theme!” Revavroom was very angry, but everyone glanced at her and slapped her.
“Okay, so Mr Glove isn’t feeling too well, so I will host the elimination tonight; you will go into the confessional booth and vote off your own teammate tonight, so get voting.” Lumi told them.
BZZZTTT.
Gwen Grothitch (Gothita) - The Girly Gallants (The Rich Queen): “Annoying screaming weirdo! I’m gonna take control of this team so enough!” She was holding a picture of Revavroom with a red X.
BZZZTTT.
Valeri Voltarge (Revavroom) - The Girly Gallants (The Spiteful): “Ugh, I hate my team! But since we are called the Girly Gallants, why are YOU here?!” She had a picture of Zorua with a red X
BZZZTTT.
Vero Splizzen (Scolipede) - The Girly Gallants (The Drunken Bug): “Hehehehe, heyyyyy, I remember this place…” She was drunk af, looking around the confessional booth.
BZZZTTT.
“Alright, I got the votes; first players safe are Hisuian Sneasel, Scolipede and Gothita!” Lumi handed them Enigma Berries.
“Thank you!” Hisuian Sneasel smiled as she catches her berry
“My reward.” Gothita smirks as she takes her berry.
“Hehehe, Berry.” Scolipede grins, as her stubby hands grab it.
“Bottom two, Zorua and Revavroom, only one will stay between the two of you, but who will it be?” Lumi asked.
“What? I’m in danger of going out already?! I didn’t even get to do my thing…” Zorua looked nervous.
“UGH, I HATE BEING IN THE BOTTOM TWO AND RISK OF ELIMINATION!” Revavroom screams.
“Anywho, the final one safe, isssss….” Lumi paused.
Zorua was looking very nervous and Revavroom was revving up her engine in frustration.
“Zorua! You’re still staying! Sorry Revavroom, but your time on this show is over.” Lumi told her.
“WHAT!? ARE YOU SERIOUS?! I TRIED MY BEST TO WIN FOR YOU ALL! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!” Revavroom screamed enraged.
“You’re kinda annoying, so I voted for you.” Gothita told her with boredom.
“Uhhh, yeah, same…” Zorua frowned.
Hisuian Sneasel stayed quiet, and Scolipede was too drunk to care what was happening.
“WHATEVER! I HATE YOU ALL! YOU ARE ALL THE WORST TEAM EVER! STUPID WORTHLESS TEAM, UGH, I HOPE YOU ALL LOSE!” Revavroom crashed out as she began to leave the show area.
“Ummm, okay then, you should go to sleep everyone, a new challenge will start tomorrow.” Lumi told them.
Scolipede was the first to stand up and leave, Hisuian Sneasel followed.
“Don’t worry Zorua, I wouldn't vote for you.” Gothita winked at him.
“Oh, well thank you Gothita!” Zorua smiled.
“Please call me Gwen.” Gothita told him.
“Oh alright, I’m Zorya, pleased to meet ya.” Zorua smiled, introducing himself to her.
“Nice name! Still, I wonder who else voted with us and which one of those two tried to eliminate you…” Gothita left that seed of doubt in Zorua before she began walking away.
Zorua was left there, confused, now only thinking that either Hisuian Sneasel or Scolipede wanted him gone!
“Wow, what an episode, huh, well stay tuned for what happens in our next episode of The, Versus, Saga, Season 3!” Lumi smiled at the camera as it zoomed away.
(Votes)
Gothita: Revavroom
Zorua: Revavroom
Revavroom: Zorua
H Sneasel: Revavroom
Scolipede: Revavroom
(Teams)
Vile Invaders: Magnemite, Ralts, Hatenna, Sableye, Spiritomb.
Terrific Tyrants: Lokix, Darkrai, Xatu, Koffing, Archaludon.
Ballistic Braves: Pawniard, Corviknight, Baltoy, Aron, Drapion.
Girly Gallants: Zorua, Gothita, Scolipede, Hisuian Sneasel.
(Post credit scene)
Mr Glove glanced at the area, still wondering what was going on, until they saw the same face on the canvas, his eyes were still, but they moved down to look at them, and he said; “THEY'LL NEVER BELIEVE YOU.”
Mr Glove looked scared and pants heavily, but they thankfully composed themselves.
“Ugh…for fuck sake…” Mr Glove looked tired of being such a mess, but they still needed to keep the show from running.
Mr Glove went to the host cabinet, and took one of their pills, hopefully counteracting the stress that's going on up in their mind, and went to sleep making the episode fade to black.