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“Barty, BARTY!” He pounded his friend's room door.
“Come in.” Barty replied, “what's up?”
He was laying on his bed, with his phone on, and when Regulus was about to tell him what happened, a voice came out of his wardrobe.
“Can I come out yet?” The voice yelled from inside of it.
“Yep, no one's here.” He replied.
After a quick moment, a figure came out of the stinky ass wardrobe, “hey…” Evan said.
Regulus was stunned. But setting all of the weirdness aside—he came here for help, not to figure out what's happening between both of his friends (even though he quite knew, actually. He just didn't bother to ask them)
“Guys, I need your help.”
“Ooh, the legendary Regulus Arcturus Black asking for our help?” Barty smirked while making eyes at Evan, he looked back at him, “okay then, spit ‘em out.”
Regulus huffed a breath, “I need your help to be…” He looked around, closed his eyes, and sighed dramatically, “cool.”
When he opened his eyes back, his friends’ jaws dropped to the floor, eyes wide in shock. After a moment of silence, Evan broke it hysterically laughing while holding his stomach like it hurts. And Barty joined too. Ugh.
“Wait, wait, what did you say Reg?” Barty said in the middle of their dramatic reaction.
“He said ‘cool’!” Answered Evan.
Regulus dropped his body on Barty’s bed and covered his face with his palms, “c’mon guys, It's not funny! I need actual help!”
Their hysteria finally calmed down and Evan sat on the floor, and Barty joined too. They look like twins—not the identical faced ones. But they both are equally as annoying so he thought that counts, at least.
“Okay…” Evan started, “why do you want to be ‘cool’ anyway? Aren't you?”
Regulus sat on the bed and looked down at them, “first of all, I'm… proper, and polite? Second—”
“Yeah! ‘Polite’” Barty sniggered, “Ow!” he yelled after regulus kicked him on the shoulder.
“Second, the situation I'm in right now… being proper or polite wouldn't really help me.”
“Now, will you tell us what sorta’ ‘situation’ you're in right now?” Evan asked
Regulus looked at both of them and thought for a while. Well… telling his friends won't hurt, right? And besides, friends are supposed to know about each other—
“JAMES POTTER SITUATION!!” Barty yelled like a little kid when an ice cream truck passed by.
“What!?” He and Evan both (basically) screamed at the same time.
“Oh c’mon Evan! Seriously, you've never EVER seen how this man looks at that football captain?”
“No…” He answered at the same time while Regulus said “How do you even know!?”
Evan's eyes were wide in shock, Barty looked like he just won a lottery ticket with his sniggering (annoying) face, and Regulus… He's red as a tomato.
“Regulus, I love you. But I'm not blind, and I could absolutely look through your ‘nonchalant act’ every time there's a football match at school. You're literally in love with him.”
“How come I've never noticed? And I thought he doesn't care about football AT ALL?” His blonde friend asked.
“Exactly, he doesn't care about football, not about the football players.”
Regulus wanted to throw up, how come his friends notice before he could even sort out his own feelings?! “Ugh, okay, fine!”
They both looked at him and then looked at each other, “so, does that mean we’re your teacher?”
“I dunno, you say.”
“Yeah, we definitely are.” Evan started, “Now… before we get to our first lesson, can you define the word ‘cool’ to us?”
“From, like, the dictionary or what?”
“No, silly! What do you think being ‘cool’ means?” Barty chuckled.
“Uh… messy?” Because, well, that's the only answer he could settle with.
The two boys on the floor looked like they might explode from laughter, but Evan just pressed his lips into thin lines and said; “really? You think we're messy?”
“Are you not?”
He raised one of his eyebrows, “fair enough.”
“Okay stop with the small talk!” Barty announced, “Now, teacher and student, where shall we begin?”
***
PLAN A
“Are you sure this is going to work!?” He whispered to them the next day at school, “And what am I wearing anyway!?”
Barty rolled his eyes, “Well obviously, we gotta get rid of your obnoxious shirts! It's 2026 now, Reg. Y2K 's the fashion!”
“Y2… what?”
Evan patted his shoulder, “Gramps, just do it.”
Barty cackled and Regulus gave them both a glaring look.
“Fuck. Shit. Fuckfuckfuckfuck.”
“Oop, was that polite?” Barty said at the same time Evan grabbed his wrist and went; “Here he comes, you go Reg!”
When he started walking towards ‘target’, he could hear his friends’ giggling from behind. Gosh, this is going to be hard, isn't it?
As he's walking around, he could feel his heartbeat in his ears and he might've exploded out of the nervousness—
“Hey Reg!” A voice called in front of him.
He looked up and saw—James Potter there. Ohshitshitshitshit.
“U-uh, hey!” He tried his best act, not too friendly, but not too ignorant just like what Barty said the day before.
“You look… different today!”
“‘Good’ different or ‘Bad’ different?” He asked.
“Definitely good.”
And, oh, boy. He might faint right in this second.
“Where—”
“JAMES LET'S GO!” A familiar voice interrupted him. And when he takes a look behind James' shoulder. His stupid, stupid, brother is there. Gotta always ruin his life, does he?
“WAIT PADS!” James fixed his bag on his shoulder, “well, that's my cue. See you later Reg!”
And then he left.
But not like the dramatic kind, though. He just kinda juggled towards Sirius.
Regulus wasn't done with his shock, when his friends were in front of him, shaking him…? “Reg, REG! ARE YOU THERE?” Barty yelled to his left ear. “Shh! You're making him deaf!” Evan shushed.
“Okay…” Regulus breathed out.
“Oh he's here, finally.” Barty exaggerated.
“That was…”
“Horrific? Good? Terrifying? Terrible? WHAT?”
“Shut up, Barty!” Evan roared at him. “Let the man speak!”
“... enough.” He finally replied.
“ENOUGH!? Well, ‘enough’ is barely enough, is it? No, we can't have this!” Barty cried dramatically.
Evan looked at him and rolled his eyes, “Calm yourself down, Bart. This isn't our only plan.”
The school bell rang, and they all went to history.
***
PLAN B
When they're all at lunch, Regulus couldn't help but stare, stare, and stare. James and his friends sat just right in front of their table and Regulus will die today. Die miserably without the love of his life.
Okay, well, that's kind of dramatic but you get the point.
“When will I do it?”
“Just watch, he’s always going to the toilet in a few minutes, you'll just follow him.”
“I don't really trust any of you,” He looked at both the annoying-faced boys in front of him, “but okay.”
And they just smirked naughtily.
“He's going, Reg. Now go!” Barty whispered, “Salute!”
“Ew stop that, that's so cringe!”
Barty gasped, “Evan!? How dare you!?”
Regulus just rolled his eyes and head to the toilet next to the canteen.
“Pssst, pssssssst!” He hissed.
The boy turned around, “Reg?”
“Hiiiiiii…” He said coolly, “so, like, odd question… but, what's Potter’s next class?”
He gave him a questioning look, “Why'd you want to know anyway?”
“Ohhh, y'know, to… avoid him?”
“Well, his next class is math,” he cleared his throat, “but you can't be here! You have to go—”
“Moony, what's taking sooo long?” A familiar voice called from one of the bathroom stalls—”Regulus?” He said.
And, of course. Sirius Black is there.
“Moons, what… are you guys talking about?”
“N-nothing! Just, schoolwork stuff! Regulus was heading out, right?”
“Right…”
He turned around and stomped out of the bathroom. Why would his brother be there, again!?!? Is Sirius' only plan in life is to ruin his?
But, hey! At least he got his answers.
But once again… why is his brother there waiting for Lupin? Huh, weird. He wonders if James knew.
As he headed towards their table, taking a look at his ‘target’ won't hurt, right? Yet, somehow. James' table is empty—
That was his thoughts, until he crashed into another person. What a great day.
“I'm so—” He looked up, “sorry…” And James Potter was there. Again. Not that it's bad, though. He's very very thrilled to see him again.
“Hey Reg! Are you okay? I'm sorry I wasn't looking.”
“N-no, It was my fault, I was too busy thinking.”
“Wanna share some of your thoughts?” He chuckled, and Regulus wanted to go invisible, “Haha, I'm only kidding.”
“Hahaha…” He muttered nervously.
“Well, I'm heading to my table now, wanna join us?”
And how Regulus would absolutely trade his friends to accept that offer is quite concerning. But he can't.
“No, it's okay. My friends are waiting.”
“Oh, okay. Well… it's nice to talk to you!” He grinned, then walked past him.
As Regulus walked to his friends’ table, he felt like he's a hollow, soulless body. Maybe James Potter has his soul (also his heart) after that conversation.
“Regulus…?” Evan asked calmly.
“I'm going to cry.”
“Damn,” Barty said, “well, what?”
“What what?”
“What did Lupin answer?”
“Oh, uhm… it's math, I think.”
“YOU THINK!?”
“No, no. It's definitely math.”
Evan and Barty sighed, “Reg… what has he done to you…”
“He took my heart.”
“Right.” Evan said sarcastically, “what did he even say to make you like… this?”
“I'm not sure,” he said hollowly, “But I'm going to barf.”
Barty shook his head and patted his arms, “Be stronger, Reg.”
***
PLAN B (part two)
“Hey James,” He greeted when he ‘accidentally’ met him on his next class 'coincidentally’
“Hey Regulus! We meet again! it's like the world is on our side!”
Uhm… weird.
“What?”
“Nah, Nothing! Anyway, I was actually about to see to you!”, He cleared his throat, “you see, Reg, can I have your number?”
“Yeah of course you can have my—wait, what?”
James rubbed his neck and smiled truly at him, “you know, to talk?”
“You want to talk, to me?”
“Why wouldn't I? I mean, if you don't want to give it to me then that's fine! I could work with offline communication.”
Damn yes. He wanted. To talk. To him.
“Oh, no! I was being incredibly rude.” He said nervously, “uhh… do you have anything to write it on?”
He looked around and snatched someone's pen, “I'm sorry, let me borrow this for a moment” He mumbled and smiled genuinely. “Here, just write it on my arm” As he handed the pen to him.
Regulus grabbed it and James extended his right forearm, James was… Muscular. Oh, what would he give to be able to hold this hand every. single. day.
All thoughts aside, he wrote his phone numbers and handed it back to him, “Well, that's my number.”
“Nice! Well, I'll text you later. I gotta go right now, but I promise I'll text you after school.”
“Sure.”
As James went to his class and he took a look at the class—his brother was furiously looking at him. Well of course he is, and of course he's there.
***
As he sprinted towards science, he just now realized that he's almost (well, he's actually) late. Really, this is the first time he missed a class—over a boy. Well, worth it.
He stopped in front of the door, as he prepared himself to open the door and see multiple students staring at him, the door opened and revealed—barty.
He closed the door quickly, “oh hey Reg, thought you were skipping.”
“Pfft, me? You really thought I would skip?”
“I mean, yeah… James?”
He smiled stupidly, “I'll tell you the whole story if you're heading to the toilet.”
And they both went there and leaned to the sinks as Regulus told him the whole story.
“No way.” He said as Regulus gave him a proud look, “wait, but to me it sounds like… he's into you.”
“No he's not?” He said, but it wouldn't hurt to think so (well, that's what he thought anyway)
“Nah, I know better than you and he absolutely is, he is literally in love with you.”
“Awe, stop it!” He chuckled, actually, it would've been better if he didn't stop.
“Whatever you say—”
“WHERE HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN!?” Evan yelled from outside of the toilet.
“Um…”
“Reg, did you realize you skipped an ENTIRE period!? Since when?”
“Oh shit, yeah.” Regulus muttered.
“Oh c'mon Ev, you'll be thrilled once he tells you the whole story.”
As Barty explained the whole story to Evan, he seemed to think the same way as Barty did. Maybe they are twins, after all.
“Reg you're in denial.” Evan convinced him
“THE NILE IS A RIVER IN EGYPT!” Barty howled.
“Well, duh?” He answered.
Barty and Evan just looked at each other, then back at him, “are you being for real?”, “you gotta be joking” they said at the same time.
“Well, are we skipping next period? Include me this time.”
“Heck yes!” Barty said, at the same time as Regulus denied it, “No!”
“Guys, I am not going to skip more classes, this is more than enough.”
“Suit yourself, Reg.”
***
At the end of the day, they went to Barty’s, since his parents are the only ones who are not home.
They went to his room and did whatever they wanted there. Evan and Barty are doing something called ‘Doomscrolling’ that he didn't really understand (until he saw them just scrolling through TikTok for hours, so Doomscrolling = being lazy? He's not sure)
And Regulus is there, on his phone, head spinning with hundreds of ideas on what to text James.
Actually, Regulus had James' number since, like, 2 years ago, he just never… texted him. Well, why would he? He's just his brother's best friend—if we're going to ignore the part where Regulus has had a crush on him since forever but, yeah, we can call it that.
But it would be so weird if he started the conversation. James didn't seem to know that Regulus had his number, that would make it creepy.
James
____________________________________________
Draft: Hi so like this is insane but i like you so so so much, i might be in love with you
Obviously, he won't send that. No way—
“I know!” Barty sat up quickly and knocked his phone out of his hands.
“Ugh!”
“Oop, sorry Reg.” He apologized, “let's go get some food! Dorcas recommended me an Italian restaurant not far from here, we can walk!”
“Uh, sure.” He replied.
“Alright.” Evan said.
And they headed there.
***
When they arrived there, it was pretty nice. And the menu is huge. They ordered some appetizers and main courses, not bothering to look at the desserts.
as they took a seat, he sat across from them, and Barty declared; “Okay gentlemans, we all know how this goes.”
Regulus just rolled his eyes. They always do this every time they go to a restaurant together. Play a game, and the loser pays for everyone. He found it annoying, though. The three of them came from high-class families, they're all very much capable of paying for their own meals, so why bother? But Barty once said; “It's for the fun Reg!” So all he has to do is play a kids’ game with them. He wonders why he's friends with them in the first place.
“HA! You lose! Regulus, thank you for your participation, and your money.”
“Whatever, I don't get the big deal anyway—”
His face drained colors as he opened his phone.
“Um, Reg?” Evan asked.
“What's wrong?” Barty said.
Regulus put his phone in front of them and let them read it themselves. He can't do it, he might explode, not knowing from embarrassment, happiness, or whatever emotion is inside of him.
James
____________________________________________
Regulus
Hi so like this is insane but i like you so so so much, i might be in love with you
James
oh
I like you too
not like, as a friend
Barty and Evan looked up from the phone, “Oh shit.”