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Today was the day.
The survivors had managed to scrape out enough victories for an entire 24 hours worth of relaxation, without a single round to interrupt their break. It was the perfect time for Two Time to enact their plan to help everyone relax.
They hummed happily under their breath as they carefully trimmed the buds off of a very special selection of plants they had grown in the back of their garden, an area the rest of the survivors usually overlooked. To be fair to them, it was also the area they tended to grow their nightshades in, so it was understandable to avoid the poisonous plants that the survivors weren’t familiar with handling. It was safer that way.
That just meant that Two Time could happily grow whatever they liked without worry that one of the other survivors would meddle with it. They were certain that Builderman would disapprove, he seemed like the type to not approve of these activities. Two Time wouldn’t call him stuck up (at least not to his face), but he could be…. A bit of a mood killer, at times.
They still remembered when he broke up the drinking contest between Noob and Chance before one of them could win. Two Time had been extremely disappointed that they didn’t get to watch Chance pass out on the floor, they had a marker they were saving and everything! What a shame, but they wouldn’t let the Admin ruin this opportunity. Not this time.
They giggled to themself quietly as they tucked the pruned buds into one of the small bags they had brought out for this. Each plant’s buds were separated into different bags, and they had labelled them with a simple swatch of color with a marker. It was the easiest way to organize them, they had never been big on naming the specific types of plant like many others did. It wasn’t important, after all.
Everyone was still asleep after the brutality that was the last round before their break. It was the perfect time for them to break into the kitchen, somewhere they ordinarily were banned from without supervision. It would be fine this time, they’d avoid the knives and be responsible!
It probably helped that they were going to smoke a joint while working. It usually kept the more unsavory voices from causing too much of a ruckus in their head.
They hadn’t given context for what was happening, had they?
A while ago, after a selection of back-to-back rounds that Two Time had survived only with the most insane tactics that the survivors’ group had ever seen (such as riding on John Doe’s back for the second half of Last Man Standing), their captor had spoken to them.
It appeared as a red and black static, taking over the world around them at the end of the final round, when they were supposed to teleport back to the cabin. Frankly, it was one of the most terrifying experiences Two Time had ever had.
Their captor had spoken, not in audible words but in scrawled text burnt into their eyes. It wanted to reward them, for they had been the most amusing of their captives. An incentive to continue their successes, they were allowed to ask for almost anything.
Now, many of their fellow captives in this hellscape most likely would have asked for practical, functional items, perhaps even sentimental things they missed. Two Time was not those survivors, however, and had asked for something their captor had not been expecting.
Marijuana seeds.
There had been a lengthy silence after their request, where they had begun frantically praying to the Spawn for protection within their mind, before reality quaked with its laughter.
It found them funny. Amusing. It granted their request, a small packet of various seeds appearing in a bag in their hand. It praised them for how humorous they were, before finally releasing them from the nauseating realm it had pulled them into, allowing them to finally land at the Winner’s Table, pale and shaking like a leaf.
The other survivors had crowded around them, offering comfort and reprieve from their experience. They had explained what happened, only referring to the seeds as more plants for the garden, refusing to give a specific answer. Despite their vagueness, it had been nice, to be treated so kindly. Guest 1337 had even hugged them! Admittedly they had sort of just frozen in place, unable to process what was going on until it was over.
Maybe he would hug them again if they asked?
No, no, to seek out such worldly pleasures was to allow sin to rule their life.
….Though, they were already a sinner, weren’t they?
What to make, what to make…. Edibles came in many forms and varieties, but Two Time only had so much time and recipe knowledge before the other survivors would awaken to enjoy their rest day. It would have to be something they were familiar with, that the other survivors could enjoy as well.
Brownies. A classic! Plus, they were a favorite of Taph, as well!
Before they got started, they pulled out a separate bag from the others containing the marijuana buds, removing a joint and a busted metal lighter from within. They had, regrettably, stolen the lighter from Builderman when he was passed out in the main cabin, but it soothed their guilt to know he had nearly twenty copies of the thing hidden in his cabin. The only reason they knew he had a lighter in the first place was because they had found him secretly smoking after a round once, hidden away in the woods where no one could smell the scent.
He hadn’t expected them to be lurking in the trees, however, so their discovery went unnoticed.
It had been ages since they’d had a good smoke session, the last time being before their death, before everything had gone horribly wrong. They hadn’t had a good opportunity to really let go in a while, especially since they shared a cabin and could only get away with sneaking off occasionally. For some reason, the other survivors actually noticed when they missed dinner and other meals. They weren’t used to it.
It was their first time smoking in the main cabin, but they weren’t particularly worried, especially since their little event would be taking place there anyway.
Now, to make the brownies! Alongside some extra treats, ones that didn’t contain anything special. The munchies could be vicious.
~~~~
Elliot was the first of the survivors to arrive at the main cabin, having decided that he was in charge of the food situation early on, he normally arrived early to start breakfast. It appeared that even on a rest day, his dedication to his schedule prevailed.
Two Time could hear the front door open from their position draped over the Winner’s Table, a half-eaten plate of cookies next to their head. Footsteps, before abrupt silence, finally followed by Elliot appearing with confusion on his face.
They waved their tail in what they hoped was Elliot’s direction, allowing their head to drop back down onto the table with a soft plonk.
“Two Time?? What the hell is going on??” The Pizza Man exclaimed, coming over to gently poke at their bony shoulder. They turned their head to smile up at him.
“Party.” They declared definitively. Elliot stared back at them with some unknown emotion stretching across his face. It could be anything, seeing as Two Time could only reliably interpret a handful of facial expressions, such as anger, happiness, confusion, and disgust. In their defense, people were hard to understand. On top of that, they weren’t particularly familiar with Merfolk like Elliot, either.
“What kind of party- Did you make these? You’re not supposed to be in the kitchen by yourself!” Two Time waved a hand reassuringly at Elliot, which for some reason didn’t seem to settle his nerves any.
“Weed party. I’m good at baking, I didn’t need any help. Wanted to surprise everyone.” They explained, rolling over onto their back and nearly falling off the table for the second time yet. They closed their eyes as Elliot walked around the room, his footsteps audible as he seemingly paced around, before coming to a stop by their head. They opened their eyes, staring up at the Pizza Man.
“Two Time. You’re crazy. And also the best. I would happily take your hand in platonic marriage.” Elliot declared, placing his hands on the table and leaning down to hover over them. They gave a soft laugh.
“So sorry to reject you, but I appreciate the offer.” They smiled, receiving a gentle pat to the forehead as Elliot chuckled, his frame finally relaxing somewhat. He was always so tense, it was nice to see him relax a little.
“Please, feel free to indulge in whatever catches your interest, friend Elliot. I made these for everyone, after all.” It was with those words that Elliot finally caved, picking up a cookie from the carefully labelled section of drugged desserts. The label was a piece of paper Two Time had scribbled the word “MaRIJuaNa” on, while the regular desserts had a similar label that only had a thumbs up drawn on it.
Clearly this was the perfect labelling system, that no one could ever be confused by. Two Time was a genius.
~~~~
It didn’t take very long for the rest of the survivors to start trickling into the main cabin, with only roughly an hour passing after Elliot’s appearance. The Pizza Man had already pulled together breakfast in record time, only eating his claimed cookie once he was finished working the appliances.
Two Time had to respect the dedication to safety, even if they wouldn’t respect the idea nearly as much, seeing as they had been very stoned while baking. Years of practice made it an easy task, however.
Noob was the next to enter, and paused for a long moment, floppy canine ears pricked, before approaching where Two Time remained draped over the table. Elliot had taken to carefully balancing some of the wooden plates Builderman had carved on their unmoving back, and they had stayed in place for at least ten minutes now.
“Two Time, I would like to ask for your hand in platonic marriage.” Was this going to keep happening? Two Time didn’t mind it, but it was pretty funny it had happened twice so far.
“You’re very sweet but I must reject you, dearest Noob.” They smiled at the yellow Robloxian who had kneeled down in front of their face, receiving a crooked grin in return, before Noob stood up. They felt their hair get ruffled as Noob wandered off to the kitchen to speak to Elliot, and most likely get some actual breakfast first.
Silently, Two Time fed themself another cookie, the plates balancing on their body staying perfectly still. All of those years of dance and posture training were really coming in handy today! It almost made all of the suffering during them worth it!
“How on earth are you so still? Is this an avian thing?” Elliot wondered, as the stack remained perfectly intact, even as Two Time swished their tail.
“Nope! Did a lot of dance and posture practice. Made me really good at staying still. Great for getting at the Killers. Heheh.” They chuckled, eyes shut and oblivious to the wide eyed look Elliot gave them. He was electing to ignore the more violent second half of their statement.
“You can dance? That’s so cool, Two Time!” He enthused, stacking another plate upon their back. It was a good thing the wooden plates were so lightweight, otherwise Two Time might’ve moved them off for now. They could barely notice the weight against their scarred back.
“Thank you, friend.” They hummed. “Maybe I’ll perform for everyone sometime, that sounds nice.”
“I’d love to see that!” Noob chimed, curled tail presumably wagging happily against their back. Two Time’s smile softened further from the buttery thing it had melted into.
“I think I’d love that, as well, my friend.”
~~~~
The others trickled in much faster once Noob and Elliot had arrived, with some rather funny and amusing reactions to their little party.
The Hacker, 7n7, had shown up silently, taking an entire plate of cookies, and then hid himself away in one of the corners, watching the ongoings while snacking. Two Time couldn’t help but snicker at Elliot’s astonished reaction, though was internally pleased at the lack of their fighting.
The Soldier, Guest 1337, was also an interesting reaction. When he first stepped foot inside the main cabin, Elliot and Noob had frozen like children caught with their hands in the sugar jar in the kitchen. After a long moment of examining his surroundings, the Guest cracked a smile, and joined the festivities.
He declined to partake in any of Two Time’s special treats, but they saw him happily eating a regular brownie regardless. He even slid one to where they laid, draped over the Winner’s Table with carved plates stacked on their back, though he did eye them curiously.
With the arrival of Chance was another platonic proposal, somehow even more dramatic this time.
“Two Time! My best bud, the stealthiest guy around!” Chance proclaimed, practically hopping in place like the Rabbit Hybrid he was. He kneeled in front of them, a faux-serious expression on their masked face.
“Please, won’t you accept my hand in platonic marriage? I’ll give you anything!” With a muffled snort, Two Time grinned at them.
“Anything?”
“Anything!”
“Even…. Your hat?” A poorly hidden smile on the Gambler’s face.
“Even my hat!”
“Even your shades?” A bead of sweat, at that.
“Well-”
“Even your Casino? Your livelihood? Your heart?” At the expression on their face, Two Time couldn’t help but burst into laughter, the stacked plates finally falling from their back. It was thanks only to Guest 1337’s quick reflexes that the wooden items weren’t slammed into the unforgiving ground, but the thought only made them giggle harder.
Their giggling appeared infectious, as suddenly there was soft laughter filling the cabin, the perfect introduction to Veeronica.
The poor prototype was unable to ingest anything, but she seemed happy to be present nonetheless, fluttering around Noob as a sort of self-proclaimed babysitter to the Canine Hybrid.
Taph’s arrival was a true treat, as they froze in the doorway like many of the others, before marching straight up to where Two Time had been sat in one of the chairs, courtesy of 1337.
Reaching out, clothed talons held their own in hand as Taph stared at them with a deep, invisible look behind their shadowed face, the slight twitching of head wings visible behind the darkness, before their hands were dropped, and the Demolitionist signed to them.
“Two Time. I am going to marry you. Platonically. No escape. Not sorry. Can I have a joint please?”
They laughed, loud and free.
“Of course!” Two Time signed back, pulling themself from their seat and taking Taph gently by the wrist, leading them to the table. They had put together a small collection of joints, ranging in quality as they had started spacing out halfway through rolling them, and presented them proudly to their fellow Avian Hybrid.
Taph clapped his hands joyfully, picking up one of the better-looking joints, before offering it to Two Time.
“Oh! Thank you, Taph, but I’m alright! I’ve already had five.” For some reason, several heads shot to look directly at them. It was probably normal.
With a nod, Taph accepted the joint, and tugged Two Time along to sit with her in one of the strange restaurant booths the main cabin had come with.
The two sat together peacefully as Taph lit the joint, the item practically vanishing in the enchanted darkness of their hood. Two Time didn’t bother to stare, that would be very impolite after all, and Taph was a good friend of theirs! They didn’t want to make her uncomfortable.
They knew it was easy to make other people uncomfortable, just by existing near them.
It was their curse, after all. Their punishment.
The real fun only started when the Admins arrived, of course.
~~~~
“....Are ya kiddin’ me.” Builderman’s voice drawled from the entrance, broken by the laughing caws and crackling flames of Shedletsky and Dusekkar.
“Aww, don’t look so grumpy Builds! They worked so hard, whoever, uh, put this together, that is!” Shedletsky cooed, prancing inside the building like he wasn’t nearly twice the height of 1337, the tallest non-Admin in the group. From where they were pressed into the corner booth, Two Time could see his wings shaking in excitement, fluttering and flickering around.
“We really shouldn’t, drugs aren’t good for ya, what if someone starts gettin’ dependant-”
“Lighten up, my friend, or else you will worry till day’s end.” Dusekkar’s rhyming voice chimed, a surprisingly accepting and peaceful expression on his pumpkin mask.
“Exaaaactly, listen to Duse!” Shedletsky backed up, now holding a brownie and waving it in front of Builderman, who stared back with an absolutely dead expression. It was enough to make Two Time giggle softly from their corner.
“Who even pulled this together?” The CEO grumbled, gently pushing the brownie away and averting his eyes as Shedletsky devoured the laced treat within one bite.
“Two Time did! They did such a good job, didn’t they?” Elliot spoke up, smiling warmly with his shark’s tail swaying peacefully behind him. He had a joint in one hand, and a cookie in the other. “Oh, there’s breakfast in the kitchen as well, if you’re hungry, by the way!”
It was the reminder of actual food that had Two Time’s companion, Taph, abruptly standing and skittering away. Builderman watched her go with a defeated expression.
Sighing, the short man trudged over to Two Time’s seat, and sat down with a huff, leveling what Two Time was pretty sure was a stern look at them.
They smiled back, cheerful, their anxiety soothed by the drugs.
“....Thanks. For cheerin’ them up, kid.” Oh wow they hadn’t expected that.
With a tilt of their head, they responded.
“....Thank you?”
“Sure. You’re a good kid, Two Time, just a bit misguided.” Rude but okay? They think?
Oh hey, Taph is back and shoving Builderman out of her seat cheerfully.
What a nice day it was, even in the realm of the Forsaken.