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Byleth made a mental note to dust off Aymr and the Sword of the Creator later after the party had ended, the two weapons crossed and resting in their mount over the fireplace. Flames danced in the hearth underneath their old weapons, embers crackling among the stones. She could hear El humming to herself as her wife worked in the kitchen, a new habit that had emerged only after the war and one she suspected was out of nostalgia for Dorothea’s constant accompaniment.
Wife was a delightful word, Byleth thought, and one that still needed more practice despite three years already in use.
She stood amongst their furniture in the living room, arrayed differently tonight to center around several different tables to allow for their friends to mingle and do as they pleased. They deserved it, after all, a little gathering for the holidays to renew the bonds of friendship forged in conflict and maintained through the new integrated mail system Ferdinand had overseen.
Byleth looked about their home with a sense of awe, a warm smile across her face and a warm mug of apple cider in her hands.
She had been put in charge of the drink station this evening knowing full well that her students, their friends, would be bringing their own beverages and tasty foods to share at this ‘potluck’ they were hosting. When El had first described the phenomenon, Byleth thought it sounded oddly like her days with Papa and his Blade Breakers but she was reassured it had a little more dignity than mercenaries scrounging in the wilderness.
A rhythmic knocking shook their front door and Byleth hoped their wreath outside wasn’t damaged; she and El had made it together two years ago.
Without a warning or waiting, Dorothea opened the door and leaned into it with her back as she carried several large rucksacks. Her wool dress was red with green accents, a slouchy beret off to one side. “Sorry we're early, Edie-”
“It's fine, Dorothea.” El came out of the kitchen and into the foyer, wiping her hands on the cross-stitched hand towel Bernadetta had gifted them last year. “Someone has to be, no?”
Byleth sipped on her cider, staring at her wife in a cooking apron over her holiday sweater and long black skirt.
“Where do you want the charcuterie board, Edelgard?” Petra followed behind Dorothea, a large wooden board in one hand and a bag in the other while she was bundled very warmly in an overcoat and red scarf with matching mittens.
“Put them over on the kitchen counter for now.” El turned with a smile and stared right at her. “And Byleth, no sneaking bites!”
Byleth nodded.
“That is reminding me-” Petra took off her mittens, then her overcoat, to reveal a maroon blouse and black slacks. “No treachery while we are being friends, Edelgard.”
El turned red as she spoke. “I-I would never-”
Petra burst out laughing, her dark complexion turning red with glee as she clapped her hands together. “I was doing a joke!”
El shifted from appalled to giggling, one hand over her mouth, while Dorothea began laughing as well.
***
Byleth leaned against the back of their sofa, watching El carry the roasted turkey she'd hunted earlier over to the kitchen table.
El smiled at her and Byleth could feel the blush on her own face while their friends watched. “It came out really well, Byleth! The aromatic you made smells delightful! “
Dorothea smirked, swirling the red wine in her glass. “Glad one of you did.”
“Dorothea!” El shouted at her, the cooked turkey clattering on its tray safely against the wooden tabletop.
Byleth went to chide El for yelling at their guest, but her voice was failing her. They all looked so happy and she could feel her chest growing warm.
She took another sip of her cider.
How odd.
***
Their front door rattled on its hinges with another series of knocks.
Dorothea shook in her chair while El laid her cards down on the bartop.
Byleth waved her back to the card game with Dorothea and Petra as she moved towards the front door. The three of them had been catching up, Byleth content to watch from a distance, and there was no point in disturbing them.
She opened the door to find Mercedes in a fine brown and white fur lined dress and hat with her brother Emile in a suit beside her with his fist to the door.
Thankfully their wreath was still safe.
“Hello!” Mercedes waved at Byleth, prompting Emile with a nudge to his side arm.
“The Death Knight-”
“Emile.” Mercedes nudged him for a second time as she led him past Byleth into the foyer to begin removing their winter gear.
“Apologies, everyone.” Emile announced loudly, Mercedes staring intently up at the giant of her brother. “I will be feasting on meats and pies this evening and have been told my bloodlust should wait another day.
“Thank you, Emile.”Mercedes smiled at him, patting him on the arm. “Now go see if Edelgard and Petra need help while I talk to Dorothea about her lovely new dress.”
Dorothea smiled with a wink at their former field medic. “Oh, have Mercie!”
Byleth smiled at the exchange, the others laughing but the sound not coming from her own throat.
***
“Apologies for our lateness, Lady Edelgard.” Hubert strode into their foyer from outside as though he had a standing invitation, his partners in tow behind him.
Hubert probably did have a standing invitation, Byleth pondered for a moment, after standing outside too long in the rain when they first acquired their little hideout away from Enbarr.
“Nonsense, Hubert, you’re right on time.” El looked up from the kitchen, Byleth watching her wife cutting the vegetables for a salad alongside Emile.
Petra had gone off somewhere, probably look at her fishing trophies, and Dorothea and Mercedes were still talking fashion over a half-empty bottle of wine.
“Ha!” Ferdinand slapped Hubert on the arm with a wink. “I told you that we would be fine-”
“L-let’s not fight when we just got here.” Bernadetta tugged on the arms of her husbands, trying her best to mediate between the two.
Byleth never did know when the three of them finally figured it out together. One day they were always arguing and bickering and touching each other and then the next day was the same except they occasionally ended arguments with kissing each other.
Hubert performed his best version of a genuine smile while he looked down at his wife, helping her take off her coat. “We aren’t fighting, Bernadetta-”
“Because it is so clear that I am correct
“ Ferdinand leaned over and gave Bernadetta a kiss on her forehead, prompting an adorable squeak from their wife. “I concur.”
Suddenly Byleth's forehead felt the need to be kissed. She'd have to bend down for El to reach, but that would be okay with her.
Hubert stared daggers at Ferdinand, taking off his own coat before stepping over to the ginger. He took one hand and looped it around one of Ferdinand's red suspenders, pulling it closer before kissing his husband.
Byleth cooed, happily watching the three of them express an intimacy in front of her that they'd been reluctant to share until well after the war ended.
Bernadetta reached up on her tiptoes, kissing both Hubert and Ferdinand in turn.
They were much bearable this way, solving their arguments with affection than endless arguing that eventually devolved into disaffected grunts and annoyed stares.
Perhaps she could have finished actual lesson plans this way.
Byleth sighed, her shoulders dropping.
She wasn't kidding anyone, least of all herself.
“I see Emile is here-” Ferdinand flushed red, his face matching her hair as he was the first to realize that the three of them were in public. He gently pried Hubert and Bernadetta apart from one another, smiling at them both before striding through the dining room. “I simply must go ask him about his work up in Hyrm.
If you needed a strategic summary, all you had to do is ask. Hubert stared at Ferdinand walking away and notably not above his waist, Bernadetta joining Hubert in paying attention.
Byleth chuckled to herself, watching Hubert and Bernadetta arrive at the same conclusion that they were being watched. She waved with her fingers at the pair of them.
She'd say something but it was hard to talk. Not physically so much, her throat felt fine and so did her mouth, and she wasn't sick. Just that the words were struggling to form in her head. It was only her second glass of cider, she couldn't be drunk yet, but she felt overwhelmed but also not. It was strange and words were failing to adequately describe the growing construction in her chest.
Which was absurd, Byleth thought.
These were her friends. They didn't get together like this frequently, all of them together for an evening, but she saw all of them fairly routinely in smaller groups. There was no reason for her to be afraid and she knew she wasn’t afraid, naming emotions was still difficult for her but she knew the basic ones.
It was something else.
But it wasn’t altogether a terrible feeling. Byleth wasn’t shaking in her house shoes, wasn’t biting at her bottom lip, wasn’t acting like a guard dog and checking in on everyone constantly. El had given her a job to perform, ensure the drink station was full, and her cooked bird had come out great for the meal ahead.
She was happy, she was smiling. Jokes and laughter abounded, her students regaling one another with their stories and discoveries and their life after the war.
Everyone had lived, Byleth hummed to herself as she wrapped her arms around her own torso in a mimicry of a hug.
Dorothea looked at Hubert and Ferdinand, rolling her eyes as she laughed. “Boys, this is for fun and not for work!”
“Bernie was right!” Bernie threw her fist into the air with a cheer as she stared at her husbands. “ Now go and mingle. You too, Hubert.”
Hubert glared at Bernadetta, taking another sip of his dark beer and grumbled.
“By order of the Emperor,” El called out from the dining room table as she played a card game with Dorothea and Mercedes, “please comply with your wife’s wishes for tonight.”
Bernadetta laughed in victory.
Everyone had lived, everyone was safe, everyone was happy.
But something was wrong with her, Byleth thought, as she squeezed her hands around her mug of cider and bounced from room to room.
***
“Hello everyone!” Lysithea called out as she made herself at home, not bothering to knock on the front door. “We brought pies-”
“Well, I brought pies and she sampled them.” Linhardt followed behind her, shutting the door and keeping the cold at bay before helping Lysithea with the pies in her hands.
Byleth sniffed the air and patted her tummy happily, the smell of pecans lingering in the air.
Lysithea scowled at Linhardt, taking off her slouchy purple and green cap. “I had to make sure they were up to standard, Lin!”
“I'm sure they're quite delicious, Lysithea.” El swooped into the foyer, taking the pies off the kitchen table with a smile.
“You don't have to baby-”
“I could use some help making room for more desserts!” Mercedes called out from the kitchen.
The scowl on Lysithea’s face vanished, replaced with a wide-eyed smile. “Coming, Mercie!”
***
“Come on-” Caspar barged in, hands tugging at Marianne’s in his grip and dragging the poor woman inside. “Let’s get you in front of the fire.
“What's going on?” El was the first to lead the charge, entering the foyer and assessing Marianne who had a bit of a shake to her despite the fur-lined blue overcoat she was wearing.
Caspar was frowning at his hostage. “Oh Marianne was outside lingering and I found her like this.”
“I didn't want to be in the way while everyone else was coming in.” Marianne kept her head down, looking at their stone floor, and Byleth barely managed to hear Marianne as the other conversations notably dimmed.
“Nonsense, here, come on.” El waved the two of them further inside, not caring that they were tracking in snow past the foyer. “I'll find you a blanket.”
Byleth had already beat El to that particular goal, swooping in with a thick crocheted red and white blanket that ordinarily hung over one of their living room chairs. She presented it to El with a smile.
(Byleth already brings one.)
“Thank you, By.” El nodded, pulling a stray strand of white hair back behind her ear and gave Byleth a kiss on the cheek before turning her attention back to their newest guests.
Byleth stood dumbstruck for a moment, her fingers tracing the outline of El’s lips on her cheek.
“Here, take this and sit down-” El patted the cushion nearest the hearth in the living room. “We'll throw another couple of logs on the flame.
“Woah,” Dorothea laughed, “settle down Flame Emperor-”
“That was eight years ago and I said I was sorry-”
“You never apologized for the outfit.” Dorothea stated, one eyebrow cocked.
“It was a good outfit!” El stomped her foot on the floor before turning to her former retainer, pink tinging her cheeks in embarrassment. “Hubert?”
Much like a house cat, Hubert looked over to El and blinked without saying a word.
“Betrayal!” El playfully cried out, looking around at everyone they had gathered. “All of you! I invite you into our home and this is our thanks?”
“Yeah.” Caspar was the first to agree, even as he settled in with Marianne near the fire with the blanket over the two of them.
“Pretty much.” Lysithea shrugged, a chunk of brownie in one hand with a bitemark in it.
“Did you expect any different?” Linhardt simply smiled, sipping from his white wine.
El looked around the room, her gaze finally landing on Byleth as the flush fled from her face and she tilted her head in a wordless question.
Byleth smiled back.
***
Byleth hummed to herself.
Now that everyone was finally here, Petra and Emile were up to their elbows in carving the bird up for the meal ahead. Petra had fended off Emile’s attempts to come at the main course with an axe several times but, in the end, seemed to relent as one wing was giving her trouble.
Marianne and Caspar were still by the fireplace, the blue-haired man with an outstretched arm pulling Marianne close for warmth. They weren’t a couple, not yet anyway, and Byleth prided herself on not being too nosey but that didn’t mean she didn’t keep up with Hubert’s spy reports that were entirely grounded in reality and never once a reliable source for gossip. It just so happened that Caspar often visited Marianne and that Dorte had been found in the Hevring stables from time to time.
They deserved a bit of peace and quiet, the both of them, and Byleth was happy for them finding one another during the war.
Linhardt was holding a piece of buttered bread that Mercedes had baked, talking with Ferdinand and Bernadetta who were holding hands and their drinks. She couldn’t make out the conversation, which was fine, but Linhardt looked content and Ferdinand hadn’t been yelling too much.
The concept of inside voice still eluded him from time to time which was, on the whole, an endearing trait.
Mercedes was doing her level best to keep Lysithea distracted with tasks, anything to keep her out of the kitchen and by extension the table of desserts that had made their way here. The facade wouldn’t last much longer, Mercedes clearly running out of things to distract the sweets fiend with, but then dinner was about to begin.
Hubert was in the corner of the living room, idly watching everyone and occasionally her eyes met with his before they pretended not to notice the other doing the same thing. Dorothea was next to him, talking about something with clear enthusiasm as she spoke with wide swings of her arms and clearly doing the heavy lifting in their conversation.
El was-
Byleth frowned.
El was nowhere to be found.
Warmth surrounded Byleth’s back, her wife giving her a hug from behind. El sidled up next to her, letting her head gently fall on Byleth’s shoulder, and hummed as her arm reached around the back of Byleth’s torso in a side hug.
“By?” Edelgard nudged her with the top of her head, quietly whispering. “You okay?”
Byleth moved her head every so slightly to and fro with a frown. She smiled but pointed to her throat, imitating speech but failing.
El moved around to the front of her, lilac eyes staring up at her and her brow furrowed. “You can’t speak?”
Byleth nodded.
“Does anything hurt?” Byleth shook her head and Edelgard stared at her, pondering for a moment. “Are you happy? Maybe just too much noise? Too many people? It’s okay to be overwhelmed, even among our family. That doesn’t mean you don’t love them, aren't happy to be here, but I am normally right at your side at bigger events and I’ve been mingling all night without you.”
Byleth sighed with relief. That was the feeling she couldn’t name, this sense of being overwhelmed by all her friends talking and the delicious smells and everyone being in their home safe and sound and happy and-
El pulled Byleth close, hugging her tight and gently humming as she ran her fingers along Byleth’s back. “Breathe, just like in your exercises.”
Byleth’s breathing matched El’s own, her shorter wife nestled up in her chest, and after a moment she felt tension draining out of her body.
“Thank you, El.” Byleth quietly whispered, her throat no longer so tight.
El blushed, red in the cheeks, and smiled up at Byleth. “It’s time for dinner. Let’s get some food in you and I’ll be right next to you the whole time. They love you, By, and you’re safe here. Now come on, you deserve to be happy amongst our little family.”
Family was another delightful word, Byleth decided, and one she hadn't used before. It was time to fix that. These people that surrounded them had seen the best of her, the worst of her, and the weirdest of her. They had watched her back just as she watched theirs and she could think of no better group to have assembled in their private little cottage tonight to celebrate and reminiscence.
“That sounds… really nice. I’d like that.” Byleth grinned with a nod, pressing a kiss to El’s forehead.
El squeaked.
The whole room let out a collective “aaw”.
Byleth looked around the room, surrounded by her students, her friends, her family, and raised her cider mug up in the air.
"El reminded me of a word tonight, one I haven't used since Papa, and I'd like to use it again starting today." Byleth paused, everyone looking at her and she squeezed El for support as she found her voice and spoke. "You aren't my students even though the monastery was repurposed into an academy free to all. You aren't my friends despite fighting alongside one another and continuing to work in the peace to achieve our dreams. I've decided, if it is okay with you all, that you're my family."
"We've considered you family all this time, Byleth and Edie." Dorothea tilted her head with a warm smile and raised her glass of red wine in the air. "To our Black Eagle family!"
Her family cheered as one, glasses raised, and Byleth could only smile.