Chapter Text
Everything is bad. More than bad. Both of his parents are in the ICU and Holly, his little sister, is trapped in The Upside Down. Mike can barely think, and standing around the kitchen table listening to everyone talk over one another is definitely not helping. Especially not when his eyes keep drifting down to where his own mother’s blood has stained the floor less than 24 hours ago. It doesn’t matter that it’s been cleaned up, blood is tricky to get up. He can still make out the shape of his mother’s body where the blood pooled around her form from when she was lying there on their kitchen floor, helpless and dying.
He’s had enough.
“This is bullshit!” Mike exclaims, slamming his palms down onto the table, silencing everyone’s chatter. He just- he can’t take it anymore. He doesn’t even know what they have been talking about, he’s been too wrapped up in his own thoughts to really focus on anyone else.
“That’s why we’re talking about it,” Nancy says calmly, always the voice of reason, but Mike is a little too riled up to listen to her right now. He watches as his older sister reaches out to place a hand on his arm, probably to console him.
Mike isn’t having it though – he jerks away from her, stumbling back a step and nearly tripping over his own feet in the process. “I- I can’t, with any-” he waves his hand around the table at everyone- “of this,” he finishes sharply. He twists away and jogs up the stairs, taking two at a time. He slides into his bedroom, slamming the door behind himself. He leans back against the solidness of the wood for a moment before pushing off of it. He starts to pace back and forth, twisting his hands into his hair and pulling at the longer strands – a bad habit.
It isn’t long until Mike hears a hesitant knock at his door. He lets out a scoff, loud enough for whoever it is to hear him. It’s probably his sister, trying to talk to him, to calm him down. He doesn’t want to calm down, he doesn’t want to talk. He wants this all to be over and done with. He wants everything and everyone to be okay again.
Mike twists towards the door, the words already shooting out of him angrily, “I swear to God, Nancy, if you don’t leave me the fuck alone right now, I will-”
“It’s me,” Will interrupts, his soft voice coming in through the door, calm and hesitant.
Of course, they sent him up – the rest of their friends probably think that Will is the only one who can get through to Mike in the current state he is in. They’re not wrong, but they’re not right either.
“I don’t want to talk,” Mike snaps, turning away from the door and pushing his hands back into his hair. However, he finds himself listening, and Will doesn’t walk away – Mike can hear him shuffling his feet against the carpet outside the door. A part of him wishes Will would leave him be, though, the other part of him, despite escaping up into his bedroom, doesn’t want to be alone.
Will comes in a moment later, deciding not to leave Mike to drown in his own thoughts. He shuts the door behind himself carefully, barely making a sound, but Mike still hears the soft click of the metal sliding back into place. “Okay,” Will says, his tone remaining gentle, patient. He isn’t thrown off by Mike’s temper. “Well, we don’t have to talk. I could listen though-” he hesitates- “if you want.”
Mike turns on him, advancing, his mind spiralling in his search for comfort of any kind – it just so happens that he likes it most when it’s in the form of his best friend. Will appears startled for a second before Mike wraps his arms around him, tugging him into an embrace. He buries his face into the crook of Will’s neck and breathes him in. Will smells like home, or what home smelled like before everything started crashing down around them all the last few days.
It helps, but it isn’t enough. Mike needs more.
Will is slowly in the midst of lifting his arms to hug Mike back when Mike pulls away, stopping him from reciprocating. He doesn’t go very far – he keeps close, resting his forehead against Will’s as the tears start to streak down his cheeks.
“I don’t even know wh- how the fuck are we going to get through this?” Mike whispers, his voice cracking, his eyes squeezing shut as more tears spill over.
“Together,” Will offers gently. He grips at Mike’s biceps, holding him firmly, wanting to comfort him. “We will get through this together.”
Mike dips his jaw slightly, but his lips have just barely brushed Will’s before the other is pulling away.
Fuck.
Will takes a whole step back, covering his mouth with his hand, feeling his eyes widen in shock as he tries to come to grips with what Mike has just tried to do. Did he really just try to kiss him?
Mike swallows hard, averting his own eyes briefly, seemingly flustered. “Fuck, I- I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”
It... it was on purpose?
“No, no.” Will shakes his head, composing himself and attempting to forget about the way Mike’s bottom lip has just brushed over his top one. He tries, he really does. “You just- you startled me, that’s all,” he admits, half of his response a lie. “You’re not in a good place right now, Mike, maybe you should sit down.”
Mike exhales, running a hand over his face, wiping away his tears like they mean nothing. “Would you... can you sit with me for a bit?”
“Yeah, of course.” Will smiles a little and both of them sit down on the side of Mike’s bed, their thighs pressing together. Will expects Mike to move over, because there is clearly room for him to, but when he doesn’t, Will thinks it’s because he likes the contact. Maybe it gives Mike comfort having someone who is close to him, close to him. “Jane is going to find Holly,” Will says after a few beats of silence, not knowing what else to say. “When have you ever known her to fail?”
Mike frowns, “Well, actually…” he glances at Will, taking his eyes off of his hands clasped together in his lap. “When you first disappeared, I wanted her to find you. And then I blamed her when they found that body in the lake, because I thought she had found you... dead. I never wanted that, I never want that. I thought she had failed-” Mike smooths a hand over his hair- “which, she kind of did, because it wasn’t even you.”
“Oh.” Will blinks, a little caught off guard. “I, uh- I don’t think I knew that.”
Mike shrugs, like it’s not a big deal, but it is. “It was a long time ago. Seems like things these days are falling apart all over again.” He frowns once more, ducking his head another time and averting his eyes again. “I can’t lose anyone else. I don’t think I’ll survive if I do.”
Will presses his lips into a flat line, before he places a hand down on Mike’s shaking one, trying to soothe him. “It’s going to be alright; we will figure this out,” he whispers to him comfortingly. “I don’t know how yet, but we have been through so much together, we’re better than before. We got this.”
Mike peers down at Will’s hand covering his, sniffling, “Y-you really think so?”
“I know so,” Will says, trying to catch his eye.
Mike nods before lifting his gaze up to his, “I’m- I am sorry about before, Will.”
Will shakes his head dismissively. “You’re tired and upset, I’m sure no one is going to hold that little outburst against you,” he assures him, then adds jokingly, “I’m sure the table won’t hold it against you either.”
“Oh, right, that.” Mike grimaces briefly, thinking back to something that has literally happened only minutes ago. That’s not what he’d been referring to though. He doesn’t really care if he upset his sister, he’s been doing that all his life. “No, I- I meant the other thing,” he utters.
Will is confused for a moment before his eyes widen – he feels heat spread across his cheeks. “Oh, no- no, you don’t have to worry about that either.” He uses his free hand to pull at the collar of his shirt, trying to get some cool air to wash over his flushed skin. “Like I said, you’re tired and upset, and I mean... I get it.”
“Really?” Mike snorts, wiping at his cheeks again. “Because I don’t.”
“You feel like you’re losing everyone- like everything is crumbling around you,” Will starts, because of course he knows. “It makes sense that you would want to find comfort in a friend.”
“Best friend,” Mike corrects with a teary smile.
“Best friend,” Will amends, laughing softly, nodding. “We are basically family with how long we have known each other.”
That makes Mike’s smile falter for some reason – his expression shifts, sobering. “Family,” he repeats slowly, like he’s sounding out the word for the first time. “Like... brothers?”
Will’s laughter dies in his throat and he is the one to look away this time. “I mean, whatever helps, I guess. Whatever you need me to be,” he mutters. He suddenly feels like the room is too small for the two of them, like the walls have began to close in. “Uh, we-” Will clears his throat nervously- “we should get back downstairs.” He makes a move to get up, but Mike’s voice stops him.
“Will?”
Will instantly turns back to him, lifting a brow – he hasn’t even gotten off the bed yet. Mike’s timing is impeccable as always. “Yeah?”
Mike’s eyes flicker back and forth between Will’s, “What if I...” he fades off as he raises a hand up to Will’s face, cupping it under his jaw. Will is pretty sure he stops breathing altogether. “What if I need something else from you?” Mike wonders, still speaking in that lower register.
“Anything,” the word is out of Will’s mouth before he can stop it, and he hates himself for it. He’s not that desperate, is he? Sure, he’s been in love with the boy sitting in front of him for possibly forever, but he would like to think he has maybe some sense of self-preservation.
Mike swallows slowly as he brushes his thumb across Will’s bottom lip, like he’s appreciating the shape of it, and then he’s leaning in.
“Wait!” Will blurts, alarms going off inside his head as he panics.
CODE RED, CODE RED – THIS JUST IN, MICHAEL WHEELER, BEST FRIEND AND LONG TIME MAIN CHARACTER OF ALL OF WILL’S DAYDREAMS, HAS TRIED TO KISS HIM.
Mike immediately stops, but he doesn’t move away – there are still inches between their mouths. “What is it?” He doesn’t seem angry about Will’s outburst, if anything, he appears confused. However, Will isn’t going to unpack that right now.
“I- I can’t. Anything, but... but that,” Will says, swallowing down the lump in his throat that is threatening to choke him. Maybe he should just let it, that is, if it will stop him from saying stupid things or agreeing to them.
“Why?” Mike sounds like he is going to cry again and Will almost wants to tell him ‘never mind’, that yes, Mike can take what he needs from him. (Who needs self-preservation anyways?) Will wants to give him this. Hell, this is something he has wanted for himself. “Why?” Mike whispers again, voice cracking.
Dammit.
Will can’t tell him the truth. He can’t tell Mike that they can’t because it would mean everything to one of them and nothing to the other. So, he opts to lie – to attempt to steer the conversation in another direction.
“Isn’t it- I don’t know, weird?”
“Why would it be weird?” Mike sounds genuinely confused now, tilting his head to the side, and giving Will that look, which is completely unfair and uncalled for. Mike’s eyes are all dark and gorgeous wide. “We’re best friends- shouldn’t we... share things?”
“I... guess.” Will is confused now, too. He has only lied because he thought it would have gotten him out of this, but- is this normal? Is he the weird one? Are friends- best friends usually each other’s firsts? Will feels his face heat up again just by thinking about it, about what else it could include, but then the reality of everything else comes crashing back down around him and he finds himself frowning, sobering up from the fantasy. “You’re- you’re still not really in the right mindset right now,” he points out, reminding both of them. He needs to get a grip. He has been up here consoling Mike for the last few minutes for Christ sakes, what kind of friend would he be if he turned this into something for himself? He isn’t that selfish, no matter how tempting this is. “I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret, Mike.”
Mike eyes him for another while, before nodding. “Good,” Mike states. “Then I won’t.” And then he’s leaning in again like that’s the end of it.
“Michael,” Will blurts out, practically a plea. “Just-” shit, he can’t think like this, not with Mike’s lips inches from his- “just- not on the mouth.” Maybe if Mike doesn’t kiss him there then Will will be able to keep some shred of his sanity intact.
Mike only stares at him for a couple seconds before he says, “Okay,” choosing not to question the request, as he presses his mouth to Will’s jaw, starting to trail light kisses along it. Mike’s other hand lifts up to wrap around Will’s waist, his long fingers seeking the shape of him, his fingertips digging into Will’s skin through his shirt in a way that feels too deliberate to not have been thought out priorly.
Will is speechless, just... completely turned on- flabbergasted. He isn’t sure what to do with his own hands, he knows what he wants to do, but he doesn’t know what is allowed.
Mike doesn’t seem to have that particular issue. It’s like that now that the agreement part is over and done with, nothing is off the table. It is only a matter of seconds before one of his hands slide up the back of Will’s shirt, flattening his palm flush to his bare skin, holding him closer as his wet lips roam along Will’s jaw.
Will shivers at the contact, and Mike pulls back. Will almost pulls him back in. He’s not getting any sort of a grip.
“Are you cold?” Mike murmurs, his eyes are glazed over.
It takes a minute, embarrassingly so, but eventually it registers that Mike has asked him a question that he should answer. “No.” Will shakes his head. “I’m not cold.” He isn’t, he has shivered for a completely different reason.
Mike licks his lips, his gaze lowering briefly before flicking back up to Will’s face. “Then... how would you feel about taking it off?” He wonders in a quiet voice.
Will’s heart does something in his chest and he struggles to catch his breath to form proper words, or thoughts, or feelings-
What the fuck is happening right now?
Mike just stares at him patiently, his hand under Will’s shirt has paused in its stroking but Mike isn’t making a move to take the piece of clothing off by himself. He is waiting.
And Will? Well, he is definitely willing. If this will help calm Mike down, of course. He’s just being a good friend. They’re friends- best friends, this is fine. Everything is fine.
“Yeah, yeah sure,” Will manages to speak out finally, before tugging his shirt off over his head and tossing it to the side, hoping he doesn’t seem too eager. The air in the room instantly prickles at his skin, but he barely feels the chill because Mike is looking at him now. Actually looking.
Mike’s gaze drops almost immediately and his tongue peeks out from in between his lips as his eyes run over Will’s bared chest like he likes what he sees. Which is dumb, because he’s seen it before.
Though, for some reason, Will isn’t breathing – he finds himself shivering again, this time under the intensity of Mike’s eyes. He fights the urge to cover himself up. Mike has seen him naked before, this is- it’s nothing. Everything is fine.
“Can I?” Mike asks, lifting his gaze back to Will’s face after an ungodly amount of time. What was he even looking at anyway? “Will?” Mike whispers, his expression crumbling slightly.
Right, questions need a response. Will isn’t too sure what Mike is asking, but he nods nonetheless, “Of course.”
Of course? Are you kidding me? Smarten up, Byers.
Mike smiles softly, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth, before reaching out for him, wrapping his large hands around Will’s waist. He strokes his fingers up and down his sides for a time, mapping out Will’s skin. He hums faintly, “You’re softer than I thought you’d be,” Mike murmurs so low that Will isn’t sure if he’s talking to him or himself.
Still, Will can’t help the question that bubbles up inside of him and spills out, “You’ve thought about what I would feel like before?”
Mike’s eyes snap up to his, and just when Will thinks maybe he should have let the lump in his throat from before choke him to death, Mike is drawing him in, pulling Will in close by his hips, where his fingers have ended up in their exploring, wanting him closer. Next thing Will knows he’s sitting in Mike’s lap, his thighs bracketing Mike’s.
What is going on?
“Once or... five times,” Mike admits in a quiet voice. “Is that okay?” He asks, tipping his head back to peer up at the older boy.
Will swallows before nodding slowly, determining that it’s safe to share if Mike is sharing. “I, uh- I’ve thought about you, too.”
Mike’s face breaks out into a smile, “Yeah?” Then his expression shifts into something more curious and Will immediately needs to shut him up.
Will jolts forward, ducking down and pressing his mouth to the side of Mike’s neck in an awkward, teeth scrapping, sloppy kiss. It’s an impulsive, not thought out move on his part, but his brain isn’t doing too much at the moment.
Mike isn’t fazed at all. He bares his throat for Will more, and brings a hand up to cup around the back of his head, long fingers slipping into Will’s hair as he groans lowly. Though it only lasts for a second, because then Mike is leaning back a bit, and unlatching Will from his skin. Will, panicked, goes to draw him back in, but Mike halts his actions by gripping at his wrists, holding him still in front of himself.
“Wait,” Mike tells him with a grin, not feeling how Will is whatsoever.
Will doesn’t want to wait, he doesn’t want Mike to have the chance to say anything else – to ask anything else. If Mike has questions, Will isn’t sure he has answers – or he does, but he’s not willing to share. Though, aside from abruptly grabbing his best friend’s dick with zero context, there isn’t anything really he can do. He’s sure that is the only thing that will distract Mike enough to let this go.
“So-” Mike tilts his head to the side, looking a little smug. Will hates how attractive he looks like this. “You’ve thought about me before?” Mike goes on, his hold on Will tight, unwavering – not open to negotiation. “When?”
Will swallows hard. He could go for it, grab Mike’s dick, it wouldn’t be that weird, especially with all this build up. He could just take the giant, intimidating leap... he won’t though. He’s too scared. He can lie his way out of this.
“Will?” Mike is looking at him again with those same curious eyes. “You can tell me,” he assures him gently. “It won’t scare me away.”
Wanna bet, Will thinks cynically.
“Just here and there, I guess,” he answers vaguely, not giving anything away. “Nothing like... too serious,” he lies. It’s all serious, too serious, too deep.
Mike appears disappointed for a second, but the look is gone before Will can really process it. He lets go of Will and carefully slides him off of himself. Mike then gets to his feet, leaving Will over on the bed as he crosses the room towards the door.
“I- I’m sorry,” Will sputters. He is fearful that he has said the wrong thing and now he has messed this all up. And even though that is probably for the best, he needs Mike to know that it hasn’t all been for nothing. That he is still his best friend, he still cares, and Mike can still come to him with anything. Just maybe not this.
Will realizes, mortified, that he has to adjust himself in his shorts, he’s thankful Mike is facing away him. “I mean… I have been thinking of you more lately, with everything going on, it’s hard not to,” he starts to ramble. “You really mean a lot to me, Mike. I’ll always be here for you and I don’t want that to change ever. I care about you, like so much, and I-”
Though to Will’s surprise, and utter fucking embarrassment, Mike only stops by the door to lock it before turning back to face him. His eyes are bright in the darkness of the room.
Oh no. Will has made a mistake. Crap.
Mike smiles softly, like he knows that Will has just fucked up royally, “Just locking the door in case anyone else comes up looking to comfort me,” he teases, “I think I’m pretty set with you.” He’s still smiling, but his voice shakes slightly, as if he’s nervous, which is not what Will is getting from his face. “Is that... is that okay?”
“Oh, uh, yeah.” Will blushes.
God dammit.
“Right.” Will is wishing he’d just kept his mouth shut. He rubs at his arms, suddenly feeling a little exposed – which is fair because he’s technically half-naked.
“Is it really okay?” Mike asks, shuffling back over to him. The way he moves makes Will feel like prey – stalked prey.
“Uh... yeah.” Will nods, peering up at him. He guesses it makes sense – he doesn’t want anyone else walking in on them either.
Although...
“Why do we need to lock the door?”
What are other people potentially going to walk in on?
Mike’s lips quirk up at the sides before he reaches up, tugging his shirt off over his head and dropping it to the floor. “Don’t know yet,” he replies in a low voice, the nervousness from before has completely evaporated. He sounds confident now.
Will gulps, his eyes lowering to run over Mike’s now uncovered chest. He rises to his feet when Mike doesn’t close the distance between them again. He slowly moves over to him before reaching out to touch the newly bared skin, because he’s taking it as a sign he’s allowed to touch him now. He hopes that is what Mike is wanting, too.
Mike shudders under his fingertips-
thank fuck, but also, holy fuck
-but keeps his eyes locked with his. “I don’t know what I would do without you, Will,” he admits quietly. He pulls him into another embrace, burying his face in the crook of Will’s neck another time. “I care about you a lot, too,” he whispers before opening his mouth against his throat.
Will reaches up and digs his fingers into Mike’s shoulder, holding him close, “That’s- that’s good,” he chokes out, unsure of what else to say. “Um...” he starts again, when he feels Mike’s teeth graze over his skin. “Don’t leave a mark, okay?”
This time when he feels Mike’s teeth he knows he’s smiling, “Don’t worry, I won’t.” He pulls back, catching Will’s eyes with his once more. “You’re trembling,” he observes, lifting a hand to brush a lock of hair back from Will’s face. “You don’t have to be scared.”
“I’m not.” He is. “I’m just... maybe now I am a bit cold.” Exposed, is more like it.
“Do you want to get under the covers?” Mike suggests, his eyes searching Will’s again. “I could... warm you up.”
Sweet mother of fuck.
“Uh... don’t you think we should get back?” Will asks, but he can’t make himself step away from him. “The others might get suspicious.”
Mike’s brows raise, “Of what?” He wonders. “They’re the ones who sent you up to me.”
Will isn’t sure why but the words send a streak of flame up his spine. Mike says it like Lucas and Dustin planned for this to happen, like this is the reason they voted that he should be the one to come up.
“Uh... I mean...” Will falters again, his mind in shambles. “Mike, think about this, really.”
Mike is nodding along like he’s understanding, but then he’s guiding Will back over to his bed and sitting on the side of the mattress. “Think about what, Will? You said you wanted to help, was that a lie?”
Will starts, startled, “Of course I want to help, but is this really the way you-”
“It’s not like-” Mike cuts off, his jaw working. He tugs Will down beside him, and Will goes willingly. When Mike speaks again, his voice is lowered. “It’s not gay or anything.”
The heat that went up Will’s spine before quickly turns to ice – he blinks slowly at Mike, but he can’t think of what to say to the assurance. He’s definitely not going to confess to anything.
“We’re friends, right?” Mike goes on, lifting his hand to tip Will’s face up to his – his fingers are gentle under his chin, not persistent, but wanting, maybe even hoping. “If you don’t want to do this, I’m not going to force you. But I-” he bites his lip, and Will’s eyes are immediately drawn down to his mouth. “I honestly haven’t felt this... good in days.”
Will swallows hard, and then feels the need to bang his head against the wall to wake himself up because he must be dreaming right? Is he really going to go through with this? He isn’t even sure what this is.
“You just- you want to... do what exactly?” Will breathes out, barely above a whisper, studying Mike’s face.
Mike brushes his thumb across his cheek slowly, his eyes flickering down then up once more, “I just want to feel good again,” he whispers. “And now that I do feel good- now that I know.”
Will waits a beat, thinking Mike is going to continue with his elaboration – when Mike doesn’t say anything else though, he asks, “Which means?”
“Well, making you feel good has always made me feel good,” Mike confesses softly, smiling a little. “So, what do you say?”
Will wants to ask why Mike thinks this makes him feel good, but he’s a little afraid of the answer. Maybe this is just another way they can comfort each other in a time of such misery.
“Will?” Mike is leaning in again, but he respects what Will had said before, his mouth going to his throat and not his mouth. His lips brush over Will’s pulse point and Will finds his eyes sliding closed.
Damn, he’s already decided, hasn’t he? Selfish or not, this seems to be something that Mike wants. He just wants to be a good friend.
“Yeah,” Will whispers, nodding slightly, not enough to get in Mike’s way. “Okay, I- I’ll help.”
Mike smiles against his neck, “I knew I could count on you.” He latches on, keeping his teeth at bay, as he presses closer to Will, and Will forgets all of the reasons why this is a horrible, horrible idea.