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Juhoon wished he could run away. Wished for a lot of things, in fact, like a home just for himself and Keonho, and a world where they’d be free to be who they were.
It was almost too hot, the blue sky endless. The grass heated the soles of Juhoon’s feet, Keonho’s head a steady weight on his shoulder.
“Wish it would rain one of these days,” Keonho voiced out, a tender timbre against the drowsy wind. He remained hopeful, even in the face of adversity, and Juhoon wished even more he could grab him and bring him to a place where nothing hurt, a place where Keonho could finally breathe.
Juhoon stared down at Keonho’s delicate face, his features tanned, dark lashes fanning his cheeks. His shoulder was beginning to ache, as well as his back for sitting on the rusted bench for an hour or so, but still, Juhoon stayed stagnant. He would not move, as Keonho finally looked comfortable—at peace.
Keonho’s hair was shorter now, close to a buzzcut. It wasn’t his decision. He wouldn't elaborate much on it, only that his father had caught him applying a little bit of dye and had become enraged. Military school was always a not-so-distant threat.
Juhoon, on the other hand, didn’t really have parents who cared, or paid attention. He doubted they’d react if he dropped dead; all their love and attention went towards his baby sister, the child they'd actually wanted.
Juhoon never wanted to live in a reality where he and Keonho didn’t know each other. From the moment they met at ten years old and became neighbors, they were all they ever had.
Juhoon watched as golden light filtered through thin, green leaves. Komorebi. His palm found Keonho’s face, cradling it. Instinctively, Keonho leaned into his touch, and for a while, it seemed like all was well, hidden in their little haven within a terrible universe.
As the orange sky fell, they made their way to the beach. Fortunately, no one else was around. It almost seemed surreal, indulging in the peach coastline and the pastel blue sea, Keonho submerging himself inside the water like he was made to be there.
Juhoon often loved watching Keonho swim. He was amazing at it, even became the captain of their middle school swim team until someone said they saw Keonho kissing another boy one time and he got bullied out of the team, while the other boy had transferred out. It’d been a difficult time for Keonho, while Juhoon had been at war with the beliefs he’d grown up with and emerging feelings, because Keonho was, and still is, his very best friend.
“Look!” Keonho beamed, his bright smile a light at the end of the tunnel. Juhoon’s heart skipped a beat. “A little crab!”
Juhoon and sea creatures were not a good mix, so he immediately sped out of the water, while Keonho laughed and laughed.
Juhoon couldn’t sleep. This house hadn't felt like a home in a long time. Stars littered the pitch black sky outside the window, the fan whirring at the other end of the bedroom shutting him out of his thoughts for a few precious seconds.
Like second nature, his mind drifted towards Keonho again. Keonho hadn’t wanted to return to his father’s place, but he and Juhoon couldn't hold hands the entire way, and people already gossiped enough behind their backs. Juhoon had hidden behind a tree when Keonho’s father opened the door for him, his hardened snarl worsening the pit in Juhoon’s stomach.
Juhoon immediately sprung up. He should've made Keonho stay the night, despite what everyone else thought. Just what had he been thinking, letting Keonho be subject to his father’s cruelty?
A dreadful tug led Juhoon to his window while he shoved his feet into his butchered sneakers. He was ready to run, search the ends of the earth for Keonho, if needed be.
Keonho’s presence just below his window halted Juhoon in his tracks. He’d found him first. Without thinking, Juhoon helped drag Keonho inside, grateful his room was close to the ground. And Keonho hardly looked like Keonho under the dim lighting, his face flushed and eyes swollen, red staining his tattered clothes.
Keonho collapsed onto Juhoon before Juhoon could begin to question what had happened. But it didn’t matter anymore; Keonho was badly hurt, and Juhoon would no longer stand there and allow it to keep happening.
“We’re leaving,” Juhoon said, hushed, final. Uncertainty tainted the recesses of his mind. He didn’t know where they’d go, how they’d get there, but he knew he had to do this for Keonho, and for himself.
Keonho looked him in the eye and nodded. He was shaking. His lips grazed Juhoon’s, chapped but soft. Full of longing. And Juhoon leaned in, holding Keonho’s face.
An all-encompassing buzz filled the atmosphere right then. Rain.
Keonho stared as the drops pelted down the window. Just like that, a whisper of a smile danced on his lips, a beautiful sight. A celebration.
They spent the next few minutes packing all they could. Books, tshirts, photos they took in the secrecy of the forest they frequented, or when they faced the rising sun from Juhoon’s rooftop, hands entwined. Keonho had left most of his things at Juhoon’s room, as if he’d known one day he’d spend the rest of his life at Juhoon’s side.
Bags half full, Juhoon confiscated the cash he’d had lying around, because sometimes he’d save up, knew he was meant for something far greater than this town.
They snuck out of the back door half an hour later. It was almost too easy, and when Juhoon had passed his parents’ bedroom on the way, he’d spent a moment watching them. His heart had ached, because this was probably the last time he’d ever see them.
Keonho waited for him outside, his umbrella ready to shield him from the downpour. He limped when they walked off into the dark, a sour wince tugging at his features, so Juhoon held him by the waist to hold him upright.
He smiled like a weight had finally been lifted off his chest, and it warmed Juhoon’s heart. “I’m glad it rained.”
“Me, too.”