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Kieran remembered the first time he met Florian like it was yesterday.
When he saw how in control Florian was battling his older sister, he couldn’t but feel enamoured over how cool and awesome he was. It was as if he was constantly shining bright like a burning star whenever his eyes met Kieran’s, making the boy’s heart leap about with joy.
These sorts of feelings weren’t ones he usually had for others.
There was the familiar love he felt with Carmine and their grandparents.
There were the feelings of respect and appreciation he had for the elders in town who helped Kieran so much throughout his life.
There were…the not so happy feelings from the kids in Mossui who found him weird for liking the Ogre of Kitakami so much. Or those feelings of self-loathing whenever he couldn’t win a battle no matter how hard he tried at Blueberry Academy. Coupled with pain and sorrow bottled up inside that he only let out within the comfort of his dorm room afterwards.
But the emotions that radiated within him from Florian’s presence were different.
Florian was the complete opposite of Kieran in every way. He was as radiant as the sun from his cheerful smile and optimistic personality.
It made Kieran yearn to be like that too.
To be someone who could be as cool and radiant as he was.
If he did, maybe he wouldn’t need to rely on Carmine or other people so much. Maybe then, he could be someone others could rely on. Being able to stand on his own two feet with pride in his every step.
The stars aligned when they were paired together the next day. Kieran’s heart fluttered with joy over being able to be useful for the boy he was smitten with.
He looked as ravishing as ever when he walked over to him and Carmine to formally introduce himself. With the way he carried himself, the difference between them was clear as ones between the sun and moon.
Kieran wanted to be like that even more.
And he wanted to be a strong trainer like Florian too. Strong enough to handle any opponent or challenge that stood against him.
He was floored by the overwhelming difference between them during their first battle in front of the community center. Florian was able to defeat his Sentret and Yanma without even breaking a sweat, sending out only his Ceruledge to handle his partners.
Normally, his opponents would show him indifference, or worse, an air of derision for his performance. They didn’t think battling Kieran was worth their time, at least that’s what Kieran thought when they looked at him like that.
Not Florian, though. He didn’t care about how well he fought or chided him for any mistakes he made. Instead, he gave the Kieran the brightest smile for a match they both had fun with.
“Win or lose, I had a blast battling you. We should do it again sometime while we’re here!”
That was what Florian told him that day. The passionate stare and thrilled gestures he made lit something within Kieran that made his chest tighten with excitement.
He had found someone who wanted to get to know him. Someone who didn’t treat him differently because of perceived assumptions. Someone who didn’t judge him for being introverted or not being able to articulate his words well.
Florian liked Kieran for who he was. And that was enough for him to feel truly loved.
And yet, his self-doubts reared its ugly head within his mind. They told him he didn’t deserve someone so amazing by his side. Florian was too good for someone like him. That he shouldn’t get too close or he’ll suffer even more pain like in the past.
That was why his anxiety won in the end when he told Florian he would follow him from a distance. Kieran didn’t want to sour Florian’s experience exploring his home and looking for the signposts with his presence weighing him down. He would just get in the way.
A nuisance.
A hindrance.
Someone who couldn’t even do anything meaningful on his own…
Useless and worthless to everyone.
While Florian nodded in understanding as he took off, Kieran couldn’t help but notice the twinge of sadness within his expression. Even as Florian tried his best to hide it from him.
It made Kieran feel guilty in the end. He didn’t want to make Florian sad because of something he did. That was the reason he decided to take greater initiative during their assignment. He told him all about the story behind the signposts, about the Loyal Three and the ogre of Kitakami that struck them down.
He expected Florian to have the same opinions about the ogre like most people in the village. That it was a savage monster that brought calamity to their land. Kieran thought the ogre was strong and independent, a being who took charge in getting what it wanted. Despite being forced to endure a lonely life for those wants.
For years, he aspired to be like that too. Kieran greatly admired those traits, and he would have done anything to be free like the ogre. Not caring about what others thought about it to live the life it wanted.
Kieran’s heart lit up once more when Florian happily nodded.
“It must’ve had its reasons, but I don’t think it’s a bad guy.” He remarked after Kieran read the signboard for him.
“You think so too? Wowzers! You really are somethin’ special, Florian.”
“I’ve had experiences bonding with Pokemon who were misunderstood, so I understand what the ogre was going through. No one deserves to be judged by quick assumptions without looking at the whole story.”
Florian flashed a warm and sympathetic smile.
Kieran couldn’t believe that he would have found someone who shared his views without turning them down without a single thought. Not even Carmine did, and she was one of the only people who cared about him, despite how prickly and rude she can be towards him a lot of the time.
It made Kieran’s heart race even more. Any further and he felt like it would explode from sheer bliss from meeting someone so understanding.
Someone who genuinely wanted to be his friend. Kieran wanted to get to know Florian better during their short time together. He mustered the courage to ask him to go with him to the Festival of Masks, where they could have so much fun together.
He would never forget how Florian beamed when he told him ‘yes’ so energetically, it made Kieran’s day. He didn’t even mind the growing blush in his cheeks when Florian joked about wanting to live with him.
Because deep down, he felt like that would be a wonderful life to have alongside such a sweet and special person.
He would never forget the candy apples they shared alone during the festival. Those soft touches and passionate gazes they gave to one another. And he would never forget the encouragement for him to do his best when he told him he wanted to become stronger to become the ideal trainer he wanted to be.
Yet those happy memories didn’t last when his feelings of inferiority came back. The bitter sting of betrayal that wreaked havoc within him when Kieran found out Florian was hiding Ogerpon’s existence from him because he promised Carmine.
He even had to audacity to lie to him when Kieran prodded him back then. That innocent expression made Kieran want to tear him apart for how much it hurt that the boy he admired keep such a secret from him.
Florian knew how much he loved Ogerpon, but he still chose to keep him in the dark. He thought Florian was his friend. Why would a friend hurt him like that?
It made Kieran want to be the strongest. Stronger than Florian could ever be. Maybe then, he could get the happy ending he wanted. Because he wanted to become as strong and shine brightly as Florian did the first time, he saw him.
However, all Kieran got was more feelings of despair when he lost the important battle to attain that happiness. It was Florian who saved the day in the end. The one who defeated the Lousy Three with such determination in his heart, along with becoming Ogerpon’s partner in the end.
Why? Why can't I be like him? Why did Florian have to take my dreams away?
All his efforts to convince the townspeople the ogre wasn’t the monster they thought she was had resulted in nothing but more heartbreak.
He didn’t want to feel such pain again. He’d already experienced it one too many times. All the happiness and joy he had for Florian vanished like they scattered into the wind. Replaced with malice, despair, hatred. And above all, sheer resolve to surpass his limits to become the strongest. So that one day, he would crush Florian at his best and prove he could shine brighter than he ever could.
Every waking hour was devoted to training and studying after he returned to Blueberry Academy. All so he could reach the apex in strength he desired. To become the BB League Champion and be a guide for every student on how a true trainer to act.
That way, he could be better than Florian. It was funny. Even though Kieran resented him for what happened between them, Florian was still within Kieran’s thoughts. As if a part of him had wormed its way into his very being to guide him towards his destiny.
His efforts were rewards when he incinerated Crispin’s team, pierced through Amarys’ iron defenses, overcame Lacey’s tricky tactics, and brought even Drayton to his knees. Along with the last Elite Four member that Kieran didn’t really care to remember.
But he could only feel truly accomplished in his efforts when he finally defeated the boy who spurned him so. Who took what he yearned for.
“I need you, Florian. So come and find me.”
To his shock, Florian did show up one day. An exchange student in their academy, looking the same as ever. Bright, enthusiastic, warm, and kind. The boy Kieran loved so much, whose presence changed his entire world.
But that look in his eyes. That energetic personality. And that damned cheery smile.
He hadn’t changed at all.
He still shined brilliantly with optimism just like he did in Kitakami, drawing people in like they were moths to a flame.
Kieran hated it. Hated those feelings of inferiority that resurfaced because of his presence. He hated how much his heart had been thumping even more from it.
Even so, he smiled manically with glee for this opportunity.
“You better reach the top. I’d hate it if you disappointed me because you lost your touch.”
To his frustration, Florian wasn’t angry. He simply nodded while his expression shifted to one of great excitement along with that cute, boyish smile.
“I’m looking forward to the day when we can clash with all our strength again.”
Kieran scowled. His negative emotions taking center stage when he repeatedly slammed his fist toward his dorm room’s wall. He would show him the current difference between them, so that he could finally move on from his weakness. Move on from his infatuation with him.
He would win, despite him blazing through each of the Elite Four members with ease.
He needed to win.
Because if he didn’t, then…
All that hope Kieran clung to mixed with the tactics and Pokemon he battled with during their Championship match. Florian still exceeded whatever Kieran threw at him. He battled so passionately that he felt like he would be burned by the other boy’s zeal. Worst of all, he didn’t even look like he was battling for the sake of winning.
He was battling Kieran because he was having fun.
Kieran wanted to have fun too. Back to those days when he battled Florian in Kitakami. Back when they were still friends. But those thoughts were akin to believing in fairy tales. And if it were one, then Florian proved he was once again the hero of said story with how he seized victory when Kieran’s Hydrapple finally fell.
All that time and effort, yet Kieran couldn’t win against the one person he desperately wanted to surpass for so long. A wave of fresh despair spreading throughout is body seeing people clamoring over Florian’s victory, not helped by Drayton walking over to him to call him an ‘ex-Champion’ during his lowest moment.
Florian was still raving madly within his thoughts. He still wanted to shine as radiantly as he did. He was the sun that brought him light and made him grow into someone strong. That was why when he found out about the Legendary Pokemon deep within Area Zero, Kieran knew this was his last chance.
“To get back everything I lost. To finally be greater than the boy who I admire so much. I will get Terapagos’ power no matter the cost!”
Despite all that, Florian once again saved the day. He overcame Terapagos’ power even when Kieran made it go berserk in the first place. And even then, he didn’t have an ounce of resentment for what Kieran had done. Instead, Florian reached for Kieran’s hand within their darkest hour.
“I need you, Kieran! Let’s fight together to save everyone!”
Florian needed him. In spite of all those negative feelings he aimed towards the other boy, Florian cared about him. He still thought Kieran was someone who could support him. To be there for him.
And in that moment, a blazing flame lit up within Kieran’s heart. Bolstered by a pulsing determination to stand beside him as an equal and finally battle together with all their heart and soul.
They had survived that brutal battle and subdued Terapagos thanks to their combined teamwork. Florian even captured Terapagos despite offering Kieran to do so again.
The Paldean boy was really too nice for his own good, Kieran thought. But that was one of the many charms that made him swoon for him.
When they returned to the surface, he saw Florian reach for his hand before grasping it tightly within the growing sunrise. With his warmth and tender touch, permeating within him, Kieran knew he could finally let go.
Now he understood that he didn’t need to be like someone else to be happy. He could just be himself, with the person who loved him for being true to himself. To strive to be the best he could be, the ideal Kieran that he could accept and love.
“Thanks for makin’ me see the light again, Florian.”
Florian nodded cheerfully, his hand gripping Kieran’s even tighter. “I want to keep be happy with you like this. Because you’re perfect just the way you are. And I will support your path to being the true person you aspire to be.”
They continued heading back, hands still gripped tightly to one another. Both happier as they continued gazing towards the rising sun.
The future Kieran yearned for was still within his hands, guided by what he wanted and no one elses. And he had the wonderful boy beside him to thank for a lesson he should’ve learned a long time ago.
Kieran would forever be thankful for that as they could now take the same road together.
“Kieran? Earth to Kieran?”
“Wha?”
Kieran looked to his right to see Florian staring at him. A mix of curiosity and concern as the chestnut-haired boy looked up and down to see if there was anything wrong. Kieran let out a few soft giggles as he reassured him that he was alright.
“Are you sure? I was kinda worried you weren’t getting enough sleep again.”
Okay, fair. He could see why Florian would have thought that. He was doing better, though. Some days, he did get a good night’s sleep without any intrusive thoughts or side effects from his relentless training phase.
“I’m fine, really. I was just thinkin’ about some important stuff and it made me space out for a bit. Thanks for bein’ so concerned about me, though. I really appreciate it.”
“Yeah, of course! I’ll always be by your side, Kieran. Now and always!”
Kieran chuckled again. “I know. And I want us to keep bein’ together like this too. Now, how about we continue what we were doin’ earlier. I enjoyed it so much, I didn’t want to stop!”
“I think that can be arranged. But I’m not going easy on you, so you better keep up.” Florian replied with the same beaming smile Kieran loved.
That’s right. These feelings he had were real. And they were ones he never wanted to let go, both the good and bad. As long as Kieran remembered that fact, he knew he wouldn’t lose his way again.
With their priorities set straight, they resumed their night of pleasure within Kieran’s dorm room. One so exhilarating that it was a night that Kieran and Florian would never forget for as long as they lived.