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The very ingredients that nurture love – mutuality, reciprocity, protection, worry, responsibility for the other – are sometimes the very ingredients that stifle desire.
Esther Perel
It was meant to be downtime, but there wasn’t a chance at all that he could properly unwind. Jack was with his aunt out of town and the house was particularly empty. Even the low hum of the television on standby didn’t puncture the emptiness he felt.
He sat with his laptop on one knee, and his phone sitting on the arm of his chair by the other. The bright white numbers from his latest check showed 1.51am. Damn. He’d been lost in thoughts of Reid and his own condition for almost two hours now and it had only felt like ten minutes.
It was a brave new world out there. What started as a terrorist attack had fundamentally changed the human race and it was hard to tell whether It was for the better or for the worse. The dynamics of relationships between people, between countries and within families had been torn asunder and rewritten with three words.
Alpha.
Beta.
Omega.
Some of the more population dense cities had closed down to prevent the spread of what they considered a disease and affront to God, but other cities, while yes there had been panic, had taken to the change as something inevitable.
Though at the same time the same religious prejudices were now turned away from east and west and moved towards these new sexual identities. It was partly to the benefit to the United States, Hotch thought to himself, was that there were so many stories of this already ingrained in the native cultures.
And this is where he found himself now; with a blinking cursor and the coloured letters of google waiting for him on the screen.
Aaron Hotchner would not have done this in any other situation, but he was desperate to know. With a sip of his now room temperature beer he tapped out those three words, closed his eyes and hit the enter button.
He expected….he didn’t know what he expected, but perhaps something more than three large links on the screen, two of which were news. He read through the articles, choking a little as he saw Spencer’s name as a reference at the bottom of the article. He closed one tab, and then the next, before clicking on a third, seemingly unrelated link that opened to a story.
Fanfiction.
Hotch had never once thought he would be looking at the fanciful tales of some over imaginative mind. But at the same time, this was some of the research that Reid had done; perhaps he’d even read this exact one as he tried to find his place in this new world.
And it wasn’t too bad, in the grand scheme of things. It was a story based on one of his (and his son’s) favourite movies and Hotch could see the similarities between the two characters in the story and how he felt for Reid. Always on the outside, never being the right time, and now fate or some outside coincidence had left him Alpha to Spencer Reid’s Omega.
There were three things that Aaron Hotchner learned that night as he read through the fanfiction; three things that hadn’t until now had a certainty to it.
One: He wasn’t gay. But he was most definitely attracted to Reid and had been even before the change. The way Reid would look at him through those long lashes, and sometimes through the unruly fringe he wore and the way that same gaze could bore into his soul. Thinking about it made his mouth dry and the warmth to begin to pool in his stomach.
Two: He was an Alpha. He had the responsibility to take care of his pack, and more to take care of his Omega or his mate the way that he had forgotten how to with his Wife. Spencer was independent and strong by himself, but the Alpha in him now knew that it was a front and he needed Hotch to be there as a rock so he could finally let his guard down. And he had to give Reid the same respect and allow his own walls to fall for the other man.
Three: He could never watch this movie, or others in the series, with the same eyes again. Seeing the passion now just from the fanfiction….was intoxicating.
The beer that had sat at his side was now half empty and joining the warmth pooling in him. The idea of this Alpha-Omega dynamic and the idea of mating was still so new in his mind, but it was something he was thinking of more now too. Putting the laptop down and finishing the beer, he went looking for what he knew was there.
Still hanging in his entry cupboard was one of the sweaters Reid had left behind. He brought it to his nose, and took a deep breath.
It was like fireworks in his blood and bright light in his brain as the lingering scent of Reid before omega flooded his nose and tongue. He had to reach to the side and hold onto the door frame as his knees threatened to buckle. It was intoxicating.
Goosebumps travelled from the hair on his fingertips along his arm and down his spine in a full body pleasure experience and as quickly as he’d held his breath, Aaron let it out, his bottom lip shaking.
Its something mates do.
The words from the story made so much more sense to him now. Being able to surround yourself with the scent of someone you need in your life, not just love and respect. To have that scent all over you…
Sober, this wouldn’t have been a thing, but the last beer coupled with the steady drinking he’d done since arriving him meant that the removing of his shirt and the pulling on of Reid’s sweater happened. He felt so much better surrounded by the smell of Reid, and when he returned the top to the man he….loved….it would smell of Hotch and hopefully show everything off he wanted.
He couldn’t wait to smell it straight from Reid’s skin.
His fingers couldn’t help but touch over the material, as if he were touching Reid himself. The way he filled out the jumper was too much, but the texture of the natural fibres would always be the same.
Hotch moved to the bedroom, his hands roaming his body, thinking of taking the sweater off, followed by unbuttoning every. Single. Button. Of his lover’s shirt before pushing it from his slender shoulders. He thought about burying his nose against his neck and taking a breath before leaving little suckling kisses on the fresh skin.
Would Reid have a gland there on his neck like the stories and some of the reports said? Hotch would tease it with his teeth he was sure of it, as his hands roamed down over every line of muscle on Reid’s thinner frame before coming to rest at the front of his pants.
Hotch took the jumper off and threw it to the middle of his bed before kicking off his own pants. As his imagination had run away with him, the tent in his boxers had made itself well known. He crawled onto the bed, leaning down and breathing the jumper back in as if Reid were laying there expectantly.
Aaron closed his eyes as he imagined again that creamy skin, licking and kissing his way down Spencer’s flat chest. His nipples would be hard and rose coloured and demanded the same nipping attention as he gave the other’s neck. He would bite it, and hear him gasp his name gently before Hotch would lick it soothed and repeat it on the other.
In his hand, his own cock twitched at the thought, so easily able to hear the sounds that would drip like whispered honey from Spencer’s lips.
In his mind, Spencer would writhe, trying to get those lips and teeth and fingernails in the right place to earn more of a gasp from him; still whimpering Hotch’s name. Lower, the show of his arousal with both an erection and the sweetness dripping from him would be slowly unhinging Hotch’s conscious brain. Everything he’d read told him that there would be….what was the word? Slick? Showing that he would be ready to take the cock of his Alpha.
And then Reid would change the name he called from Hotch to Alpha, as more instinct took over and the walls surrounding his heart and mind fell away completely. There would be trust absolute.
And then he would test that wetness, slipping two fingers in and testing the heat and depth of it. There would be a stretch, but he was sure that Reid’s body would suck them in. The feeling would be incredible, Aaron was sure, and he couldn’t wait to have his cock surrounded by the perfect folds of the younger man’s body.
Hotch groaned, forehead now resting against the sweater, hand working his cock in all the ways. He was leaking already, harder than he’d ever been and his cock felt as if his hand were not enough. And his cock would have been right.
His imagination played out pressing the flared tip just inside the slick entrance. The way Reid looked up with pitch black eyes and heaving chest flushed with arousal almost made him undone.
“Put it in me,” Reid breathed and he slipped his entire length into the welcoming body in one long move.
In the darkness of the empty room, Hotch thrust into his own hand, imagining he was testing all the different angles in Reid’s depths, looking for the perfect one to make him moan for more.
He was lost, like in a dream, fucking his hand while fucking his Reid.
And then it hit him.
A new pressure at the bottom of his length, a new shape, a new….sensation that he’d never experienced before.
In the story Hotch had read, it was something the omega had begged for.
Knot me.
He imagined those words demanded breathless by Spencer and Hotch’s eyes closed again, the knot filling his hand like he knew it would fill Reid and he let go. Ribbon after ribbon spilled and covered the sweater while his knot held tight like a plug. It was the most he’d ever given.
When he finished, he looked at the still heavy cock in his hand, and the red swelling just above the base. How long would it be like that? An hour? Half that?
He groaned as he touched it. This was the same thing that kept seed in dogs when bred, and he could only imagine in that moment giving Jack a brother or sister.
Beside the come-stained sweater he bit into a pillow to hide the almost delighted moan that bubbled from his chest. They’d better find him soon.
Reality, although harder, was always better than the dream. And that meant Reid would be too.