Work Text:
①
Winter arrived, and for Reasons™, Victim ended up working from home.
Luckily his place was huge, and winter was usually when all the Hollowheads huddled together. With Victim and TDL unable to go out, and TSC unwilling to go out, it always fell to poor TCO to brave the cold for supply runs.
Victim: Get lots of food. [eyes glued to his laptop, didn't even look up]
TDL: I want a Hawaiian pizza. [cracking open a soda from the fridge]
TCO: Where's little Sec?
Victim: Sleeping.
TCO: You know, I've been thinking...
Victim: About what?
TCO: What if we just... installed floor heating at the office?
Victim: First of all, that would cost a fortune and take forever. Second, you'd freeze on your commute and go into hibernation anyway. Third, I refuse to put floor heating in the bathroom.
TCO: ...Fair.
Victim: If you hate living together that much, feel free to leave.
TDL: Yeah! What he said!
---
②
That said, Victim never actually kicked TCO out — because who else would do the shopping? He couldn't keep asking the mercenaries to run errands, especially since Hazard tended to freeze up in winter.
So Victim and TDL would spend their winters curled up on the couch, using their two warm-blooded, upstanding Hollowhead brothers as living heaters while they watched movies. And, most importantly — the nest-building competition.
TSC was perpetually frustrated. No matter how warm, cozy, and bright he made his little owl nest, Victim would always drag him into his own snake nest instead. And his beautifully feathered little nest? TDL would swipe it and glue it to his own web with silk. TSC had a sneaking suspicion those two were conspiring — he'd overheard them whispering about "new material research" more than once. TDL had a natural gift for structural design, and Victim seemed perfectly happy to let him handle it.
As for TCO — well, you couldn't exactly call his eagle nest "cozy." It was a nest, technically. That was about the nicest thing you could say. So sometimes he'd sneak into TDL's room, only for TDL to complain that he kept snapping his webs every time he moved his wings.
Naturally, TCO asked why TDL never used his own feathers instead of TSC's.
TDL's answer was simple: "His feathers are all hard and black and ugly. Little orange's feathers are way prettier."
Victim walked by and added: "And plucking his pin feathers is a nightmare."
As for why no one ever tried to crash Victim's nest — well, his dark gothic snake-den aesthetic wasn't exactly everyone's cup of tea. TSC always felt a little uneasy sleeping there, not that Victim ever let him leave.
The nest-building competition always ended the same way: come spring, they'd tear down all those silly little structures.
---
③
Snakes, as everyone knows, can go a long time without eating. Victim, being a workaholic, often forgot to eat altogether. Which led to one particular incident:
TSC was lying in bed when he felt something warm and wet on his arm. He opened his eyes to find his big brother had already swallowed half of it.
Victim: ...Sorry. Worked too long. Forgot to eat.
TSC: [yanks his arm back in horror] Big bro, you REALLY need to eat properly...
Victim: My apologies. I'll remember next time.
TSC: You're not... going to eat my friends when you get hungry, are you?!
Victim: No.
TSC: I don't believe you! Your employees are in danger too!
Victim: I promise I won't. Really, little Sec.
After TSC spent some time diligently supervising Victim's meals, he finally relaxed.
---
④
The mercenaries found out about this.
Agent: To be fair, his friends aren't even enough for a snack.
Pixel: Yeah.
Hazard: Besides, the boss would never allow it.
Primal: ...I am a little curious what they'd taste like, though.
Agent: Drop it. Back to work. Training ground this afternoon.
---
⑤
Since two of his brothers were birds, Victim's bathroom had a massive drying room. TCO and TSC loved lounging in there, enjoying the warm air.
TDL and Victim rarely used it — too much warm air made them sleepy.
---
⑥
TSC: WHOA! Dark, let go of Yellow!!!
TDL: [holding a terrified, stress-balled Yellow hamster] Huh? I was just taking him to the office to check out the new project Victim and I are working on.
TSC: ...You're literally scaring him half to death!
TDL: What, you think I'm going to eat him?
TSC: ...Wait, you WEREN'T going to eat him?!
TDL: [nods thoughtfully] ...Huh. Now that you mention it, I kinda want to try.
Yellow: [his soul has officially left his body]
In the end, with TSC's moral support, Yellow made it back safely to Alan's computer.
---
⑦
Blue was a very tidy bunny. On sunny days, he loved sitting quietly on the Minecraft grass, grooming his fur.
Even though sometimes a red Sonic-wannabe dog would zoom past, covered in mud.
Even though there was a noisy kingfisher singing and live-streaming right next to him.
Even though a certain hamster kept getting rice grains stuck in his fur while hoarding food.
Even though a little orange bird would flop onto the grass and burrow into his fluff for a nap.
---
⑧
Dinner for the brothers was always:
Nether Wart Pizza.
Nether Wart Ramen.
Nether Wart Burger.
Nether Wart Fries.【6†L4-L5】
---
⑨
The mercenaries' training ground was massive — Victim had even set aside budget to build them a pool.
The mercenaries all agreed: their boss was pretty great in that regard, even if he could be a bit of a hardass at work.
This was exactly why they loved field assignments.
Hazard wasn't too thrilled, though — Primal had a habit of tracking mud into the pool. So Hazard always made sure to get in first, just to avoid the mess.
---
⑩
At first, Alan wasn't too keen on TSC spending winters at Victim's place. He was worried. But TSC didn't see the danger — especially since TCO was there too. And Victim genuinely wanted TSC to spend more time with his brothers during the cold months.
Eventually, Alan gave in. The computer didn't have seasons anyway. The Color Gang didn't hibernate — they could wait for TSC to come back in spring. And they could always visit him on the wider internet whenever they wanted, maybe even for Christmas. As for Yellow and Green, who got cold easily, they'd receive a thoughtful gift: rabbit-wool sweaters.
Blue wanted to knit one for Red too, but sadly, he didn't have enough fur to spare.
Under Red's big, watery puppy-dog eyes, Blue reluctantly promised to make him one next year.