Chapter Text
Ever since the day he was born, Ze has always been seen as the lesser-good child of the family. His sisters, unlike him, always had the much needed attention required for a child to properly grow up.
He was taught to hide his Avian tendencies, that they were shameful and disgusting, that he was a monster, a disgrace. His siblings were praised for getting out of the womb lookingly “normal”; They were humans… So why was he not? His greyish blue wings were clipped at the ripe age of five years old and his Avian side’s vocal cords were almost all the way restrained from a long-procedure medication his parents forced him to consume. The loud chirps emerging from his throats slowly grew quieter and broken, just enough for his mother’s contentment.
The pair of wings atop his skull were kept imperceptible using sharp clippers to his head. As he grew older, he would get severely punished if he ever dared to lay his hands on the chattels restraining his head wings; Causing severe mal growth. He would get locked up in his room for hours on end, ripped from his feathers and so on. Over time, his hair thickening slowly enveloped and curled around the restrained pair; turning them to an imperceptible background feeling deep within the back of his head. The aching agony inside slowly grew towards a dull, numbing ache.
When he met other Avians surrounding his town, he couldn’t help but feel a pang of envy and dread filling his senses.
He couldn’t help but feel out of place,
Different.
The other similar creatures as him had sharper features and larger, confident wings. They had an undeniably strong sense of self worth and couldn’t help but get admired wherever they went; even if it did turn out borderline obsessive at some point.
They had swan-like wings, shining bright under the gaze of the sun; catching everyone’s eyes. They were well-trimmed, cleaned to the brim and insanely soft.
Meanwhile, he was standing deep within the crowd, his tied, matted wings pulsing against the restraining rope hugging his back to his chest deep within his sweater; something he had learnt to do by himself to hide his nature.
Unlike his main wings, the pair clipped atop of his head were way smaller compared with other peers of his species, they were insanely undergrowth because of the lack of freedom and movement. Sure, he did keep the pair on his back tied up flush against his back, but they were let free during his sleep; where they grew like any other Avians, growth mainly happens during sleep after all.
The mane of feathers hugging his neck grew larger and larger as he began entering his teenage years, but he always found a way to keep it away from sight. Ze would trim it from time to time, wear insanely long scarfs or simply keep a turtle neck sweater on his body, even with the insanely hot weather outside. He would pluck the tufts of feathers growing on his chest and back, flushing them down the toilet afterwards. On some unlucky occasions, it would clog due to the amount.
_____________
Ze was the black sheep of the family, different, never the center of attention. With each academic struggle he experienced, he received nothing but scolds and lectures. Phoebe and Ana, them, received praises and encouragement from their parents, pushing them to continue further on in their studies. Ze learnt to sulk and keep every emotional struggles to himself, because he learnt that opening up only directed to weakness and disgusting vulnerability.
For him, love wasn’t something free to receive, it was something to earn.
At 17, he was sent to boot camp by his father because he believed it was best for him. At first, Ze absolutely despised the area, he only wanted to go back home. But as time went on, he accepted it. He realized that this would most likely toughen him up and teach him how to act like a man. Throughout his stay, he learned the basics concerning first aid, and he immensely improved on his physical fitness. He was taught how to handle weapons correctly; mainly guns, which would most certainly come handy to use in the near future. Ze also learnt how to repel his overwhelming emotions, push them down and not let them take over his control in fear of letting his masculinity fray the edge of weakness.
Around a year had passed, Ze got released from boot camp at freshly 19 years old. Once he stepped a foot in his home, he was met with the overwhelming familiar scent filling the house; A scent he had long gone without cherishing. His sisters instantly noticed a change in Ze; His newly stoic demeanour, and how he stood a little straighter with stiffer shoulders.
Ana ran up to him, tracing the battle scars along his face, feeling the healing skin beneath her fingers.
“Oh.. Oh my god, Ze.” She muttered under her breath, her voice soft and gentle. “You’ve.. Changed.”
Phoebe paddled across the room to join the both of them. Her eyes glared straight at Ze’s face, examining every single detail, as if comparing him to his younger self.
“Welcome back home, Ze.” Her voice was one of a monotonous tone. She stood there, arms crossed. “How was your stay over at boot camp?”
“Tolerable.” His answer was immediate. The tension that had settled between the two of them was so heavy that the air could crack anytime soon.
“Ana’s right, you really did change. I can feel it just by staring you down.” Phoebe approached Ze with precaution, her hand reaching for the clipped wings deep within his hair. As soon as her finger lightly grazed his… Wait. Was that skin?
Ze swatted her hand away before she could examine the state of the evidence of his Avian flu further.
“Phoebe, do not.” He took a sharp inhale of air at the contact. “Don’t touch these, please.”
“Was that skin? Ze, when was the last time you took off the clippers?”
There was a gut-tearing silence between the two, but Ze’s facial expressions remained as stoic as a rock.
“Ze! Your skin is literally growing over the clippers restraining your wings! Don’t you know how painful it’ll be to remove them the longer you wait?”
Phoebe snapped. Ana had stepped aback as soon as the tension between them spiked to an unbearable point. She was anxiously fiddling with her fingers, her eyes scanning the room.
“Your wings will grow to be severely underdeveloped, if they already aren’t! They will lose mobility soon enough if you don’t start taking care of them!” She added.
“Well I don’t CARE! I want them gone anyways, what’s so hard to understand?” He snapped back, his emotionless demeanour finally breaking. “I’ve grown attached to the side of me where the monster is hidden. It’s better this way and it always will be.”
Phoebe stepped aback, her posture visibly loosening. “Ze… You’re not a monster. You know you aren’t.”
“You don’t know how it feels, growing up treated like one the entirety of your life.” He murmured back, already storming off to his room before he physically took his anger out on something within his range of view. He slammed the door shut behind him, stripping off his uncomfortable clothes and throwing them on the ground. He grabbed a simple pair of shorts and a loose, grey tank top.
He laid back against his bed, bringing his hands up to his face. He couldn’t believe he had just let his emotions slip and take over his control like that.
But each time someone briefly mentioned the existence of the monster within him, something flaming hot stirred deep in his core; An unbearable agony to his already fragile facade.
His bedroom door suddenly flung open, Ze’s mother barging in.
“So, Ze. You didn’t infest the place with your disgusting feathers, did you?”
_____________
The air enclosed within the household felt more and more suffocating as the days went on, it was slowly driving Ze insane, like he was on the verge of breaking. He stepped in multiple enterprises and requested plenty of interviews to get hired and collect cash; he needed to move out, and soon. Ze managed to receive two part-time jobs during the weekend and one full-time within the week. It gave him the peace of mind, finally feeling like he wasn’t suffocating in his own home. Atleast… Physically.
Ze was barely ever home anymore and he would only get back by midnight, his sisters definitely took notice of that. Phoebe and Ana informed their parents about the occurrences, but they simply shrugged it off almost as if Ze was a stranger from their eyes.
—
From their point of view, you are an incompetent, worthless little child.
—
One random night, while everyone was fast asleep, Ze decided it was the right moment to escape this hell hole of a household. Did he have a plan? No, he did not, he was going to figure out what to do on-the-spot. He packed all of his necessities, such as painkillers, snacks, clothes, leaving only the worthless items back home.
His window clicked open and in the blink of an eye, he was gone, left with no trace but a single, dirty feather on the ground.
_____________
He walked as far as he could, for hours, until the path he followed became unrecognizable beneath his feet. The soft breeze of the wind slowly took in, making Ze shiver under his skin; his clothes barely doing anything to dull the coldness of the atmosphere. The empty street was fully lit by the gentle bloom of the full-risen moon, a loud contrast between the environment and Ze’s racing mind.
The avian found a quiet passageway hidden beneath the leaves and bushes. Honestly, if this wasn’t for the fact it was imperceptible, drug dealers would most likely have taken advantage of this place long ago.
He took a few steps forward, his Avian’s night vision quickly adjusting to the sight beneath his eyes; A dark, humid hallway with a lone bench situated right in the corner. Ze walked over to the seating, quickly settling himself on top.
“My bed for tonight, will do.”
He slowly laid down, resting his head against his arms neatly. His wings twitched restlessly against the tightly tied rope, begging to be let free from their confines. But of course, they were outside.
Ze’s mind couldn’t help but wander back to his family… His sisters. Would they care that he basically ran away? That he was gone? No, of course they wouldn’t. His entire family never cared about him, and he could never ever pour his trust into anyone, especially them. In his entire 19 years of living, he never had a specific someone to get attached to and share everything.
That was until he met them.
“Yo! Moe! Look at that. Some homeless dude took hostage of our favourite spot.”
Ze practically jumped out of his seat, clearly startled, falling directly into the entity’s arms.
“GAH! WHAT THE FUCK?!”
He immediately stepped aback, swatting the entity with his hands.
“Jeez Louise. I don’t reek that much, do I?” It spoke, its voice an unusually deep, inhuman tone.
“Honk, honk honk!” A clown honking repeatedly could be heard.
“Oh, come on! I swear, I double shampooed too!” He exclaimed.
Ze was frozen in place, was he seriously watching two possible drug dealers argue about bodily odours?
“Honk, honk honk honk honk honk!”
“No way! That’s not me! I am not ‘pheromoning’ inside the house. That was the skunk I accidentally stepped on a few weeks ago.”
“Honk honk honk.” She admitted in defeat.
“See! Now you get it- OH BARNACLES!”
A shotgun was directly aimed right at his singular eye, Ze’s finger was resting right against the trigger, ready to strike.
“What are you? What do you want from me?”
He took a step back, his chest rising and falling in an uneven rhythm. Ze’s hands were trembling and his breathing was hitched; He was clearly panicked and on-alert. His eyes scanned the tall, looming entity. He was missing a few limbs, half of his torso and surprisingly had an extra arm on his left side. Most importantly, his bright, golden bones were exposed. Would that not hurt? Ze frowned at the thought.
“Wow, wow! Calm your nerves, homeless dude.” He exhaled, a slight crack apparent in his voice; most definitely startled by the sudden gun approach.
“My name’s Regect, and the clown girl is called Monella, Moe for short.” He fiddled with his claws for a quick second. “And for your record, we only came here because this is our usual hanging spot. But oh NO! We found a random homeless dude lying against OUR beautiful bench!”
“Honk honk, honk honk honk!” She exclaimed with a grin.
“Yeah, what she said.” Regect crossed his arms, his stiff posture loosening ever so slightly.
Ze gulped, slowly lowering his gun, still unsure on what to do next. He grumbled something under his breath, before turning back to the passageway entrance. “I don’t understand her shenanigans. And yeah, yeah. I’ll just find another fucking spot. It’s not like I searched for hours.” Ze took off, his steps quickened.
The noises of footsteps echoed across the halley way, becoming quieter and quieter by the second. Moe turned around and glared at Regect with that one, pleading gaze. “Honk, honk honk.”
“Moe! Don’t tell me you feel bad for this weird human! He harassed our beautiful bench-“
She glared. “Honk.”
“FINE! Fine. I’ll go ahead and ask him.”
Right as Ze was about to toss away the leaves hiding the exit, a loud, rustling noise could be heard from behind him. A strong, charcoal black hand gripped his wrist. “Hey hey hey. Just hold on a second.”
“What on earth could you possibly want from me? To roast and eat me for dinner?” Ze almost yelled.
“No! Fuck no! I’m not into humans like that you idiot. Quit trying to run away like we’re going to eat you raw, we’re not like this! We’re extremely nice, very friendly entit-”
“Get to the point.” A sharp voice cut him off.
“Alright! Alright… Uh… Do you even have anywhere to stay the night?” Regect muttered under his breath.
“A little louder, I couldn’t hear you quite well moron.”
“Oh MY- Okay, okay.”
…
“Doyouhaveanywheretostaythenight?”
“Seriously? All of this fuss just to ask me this shit? Why should I even answer your question?”
“GODAMNIT JUST ANSWER IT!”
Ze’s brow furrowed, examining the way Regect’s pupils turned into menacing slits when he was angry. “Jesus, Okay. No, I don’t have anywhere to stay the night, happy?”
“Okay, yes. Very happy.”
An awkward silence was set between the two of them.
“So… Moe asked if you’d like to sleep the night over at our place. She felt bad for you, I don’t know why though.”
“WOW!, thanks prick. And why should I trust you guys enough to go settle at your place?” Ze’s patience was running thin. This weird seeming entity was obviously intimidating, but his personality was the complete opposite. He was a complete fucking idiot.
“Well- I don’t know! Would you rather sleep on a cold, humid bench in the middle of nowhere or a soft, warm cozy bed?”
Ze seemed to think for a moment, before letting out a soft exhale, his shoulders dropping ever so slightly. “I.. I guess you’re right.”
“So we’re settled now? Let’s go get Moe and go!”
They went to regroup with Moe, before taking the semi-long trip towards their house.
_____________
After a long moment of silence and soft honking to melodies of the songs, Ze broke the tension.
“Where do you guys exactly live?”
Regect pointed over to the woods
“We live deep inside the woods, and we have a really beautiful lakeside view, if you ask me!”
Ze leaned his head back, a groan escaping his lips.
“Yeah. Definitely not creepy at all.”