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The stadium’s lights were shining brightly upon the whole field. After an underwhelming match against Santos - Chivas had come out the winner. An imprudent graze of a foot was enough to earn them a penalty, and if it alone brings them on top and gives their people something to cheer about, then so be it.
The penalty gave them the win this night, saving them from the harsh criticism they would've received had it not been an option. Chivas had the edge the whole night, but by a low margin. Santos had their chances, and just like them, they weren’t able to capitalize.
They needed refinement. They needed to improve in their collective game. Santos should’ve been an easy win yet they couldn’t land a single shot.
At the end of the day they won, and if Brian had a say, he’d say they won fairly. They were the better team - the team that had the edge all night and won justly.
The stadium cheered when the referee blew the final whistle - the game coming to conclusion. A win was a win and corrections would come, but for the moment all Brian wanted to do was celebrate the victory.
He shook hands with the opposing team and took his time to chat with Acevedo who he had gotten close to during the World Cup.
He’d gotten to every teammate after the match, hugging and celebrating their win. The one missing from the list found him last.
Armando was benched all night. A rare occurrence, he thought, but didn’t ponder further about it. Milito had his plans and structures, and he couldn’t make him jot down Armando for every game - as much as he would like to.
Armando was a rising star. He only desires to see him shine because no one does it better than him. His confidence may not be the best at the moment but he was still the same person at the end of the day. The same man he loves. He’s the same Hormiga every fan adores, whose shine only needs to be given a little tune and adjustment. He’ll get his groove back. His mindset will reset once he feels the roar of the crowd when he finally scores his goal. It’s a matter of when, and he hopes their next match against Xolos in their home turf will break his spell, for him and the betterment of the team.
Armando hugged him in the middle of the illuminated field, surrounded by their people and the stars above them. It was unlike any typical hug he’d give to anyone. The hug had meaning - meaning he wouldn’t yet know about. Brian thought Armando was happy over the win. He thought he hugged him because he thought he could’ve and would’ve done something to make the match feel complete.
Brian hugged right back, embracing his lover with the same vigor he conveyed. Armando kept them confined, not willing to let go just yet. Again, Brian didn’t think too hard about anything as he held him.
Armando eventually parted from him an inch, still in each other's hands. He smiled genuinely, a private one meant only for him. The ones only he got to see and the rest of the world would never be able to witness. He looked happy as could be.
Armando closed the narrow gap, catching his lips in a kiss. It was a short little thing but it carried unsaid thoughts. Armando gave him another peck.
The fans that still remained seated within their view cheered and whistled in support of the couple. Brian lightly laughed and Armando reddened at the crowd's teasing. Brian used the moment to give him a kiss on the cheek, and Armando responded by covering himself in the nook of his neck, since the doting action only made the fans' reaction much more prominent.
It was a rare display of affection. Even rarer when Hormiga commenced them.
Their relationship was the talk of the sport channels and media back before the end of the last season, but fizzled out once the World Cup took over every corner. They had the support of the fans and the backing of the team, and they couldn’t be more grateful for the response.
Even with the overwhelming positive reaction, Brian and Armando decidedly choose to limit their actions in the public's eye. They allow themselves little touches here and there. A picture of them holding their hands may pop up in the Chivas official page once in a while, and sometimes one of them will share a photo on their account. Tonight Armando initiated and Brian couldn’t help but reciprocate.
Armando at last separated from him as the whole team clapped in unison to thank the fans for coming and supporting them in the away turf.
They both went into the visitors' changing room afterward and took a quick shower. Brian packed their bags with their clothes and necessities while Armando took his time. He waited patiently outside the showers listening to soft tunes through his headphones.
Finally out, they walked side by side through a hallway filled with media and cameras at both sides waiting and hoping to take exclusive shots of any and all players as they passed by. They ignored them and went straight towards the bus which would take them to the airport. They had a long night ahead of them and he could feel Armando starting to slowly drift.
They sat together. Brian buckled him up, because the smaller was apparently too tired to do it himself, but he didn’t mind. Brian would do just about anything for him.
They waited as few stragglers and their coach, who was most likely running his post match conference late, filtered in one by one until everyone was accounted for.
Armando, sleepy and tired, grabbed his hand, interlacing them during the late drive. He looked down at his face, finding him facing the ground at nothing in particular. Brian lightly squeezed his hand. The low and soft tunes continued as Armando tilted his head over with a smile. It didn’t convey happiness, rather it tried to. The little smile didn’t match his eyes, telling him a different story. And again Brian didn’t dwell on it, blaming the late night shower and the cold night for Armando’s froggy state.
Armando had whispered into the air: te amo, which he couldn’t hear through his headphones, but was able to read clearly as he mouthed the words through his pretty pink lips. He kissed his lover's temple, hoping to convey his shared feelings.
Armando slept against him that night and throughout the whole flight. On the contrary, he stayed awake through the whole passage, as he was never able to sleep through them.
He used the sleepless night going through the shared playlist Armando had shared with him back when he first landed on Mexican soil. Armando had told him his ‘gringo’ shit sucked and he was missing out on the real heart wrenching stuff. He still enjoys his own music but when he’s around Armando, training, or sometimes when he can’t help but think about him - he plays the tunes and sings lightly alongside the love inducing lyrics he’s come to associate with him.
Brian knows he’s fallen deep, and it only continues to grow with every passing day.
***
The team was given a free day the day after their rough win. The day was predicted to be a sunny and bright one for the most part, a perfect day to go out strolling through Guadalajara's lively streets. Brian had only one person in mind to spend it with.
He’d planned a date beforehand, reserving reservations for a private cozy restaurant tucked in the corner of the city he was sure Armando would’ve loved.
He planned to take him on a walk to a secluded park where he’d surrender to his whims and buy him all the street food he knew he loved.
Then afterwards, after they’d had their fun, and their soles spent - he’d take him to his apartment where he imagines they would’ve ended up tussled in the sheets of his bed by the end of the night.
It sounded perfect in his mind, and it would’ve been. Unfortunately Armando couldn’t fit in his plans today. He texted him the news in the morning. Armando was going to spend his day with his family. People who loved him.
—-
mando❤️
sorry brian i can’t today
—-
it’s ok, be with your family, i’ll be waiting for you when you come back
i love u
—-
mando❤️
love you too
—-
He couldn’t be mad. Armando’s family came first, he knew it’d be the case when Armando agreed to be with him.
He canceled the reservation and scrapped his plan. Maybe some other day he’d get the chance to take him out and spoil him rotten like he deserves to be.
***
It was when the sky started to gloom, and dark ominous clouds accompanied by big gusts of wind began to stride in, when the news broke out. Brian had no idea about anything yet that late afternoon when the sun set aside and the first raindrops began falling outside his apartment complex.
He received the news via text. One of his teammates forwarded him a page known for posting any and all types of Liga MX news. And when he opened up their chat, the first thing he saw was a picture of Armando, which was nothing unusual. Armando has been the talk of the week - he’d thought to himself for a split second. But then he read the big white font on the bottom, and his heart sank.
—-
Official
Mexican Striker Armando González is set to be the new reinforcement for the Greek Football Club Olympiakos
The first Mexican set for Europe after the World Cup
—-
He froze. This couldn’t possibly be real. The account must be confused or had made a terrible mistake, he rationalized. What good are they gaining by spreading clear misinformation? There’s no way Armando is leaving him.
They both knew his possible venture to Europe would be coming soon rather than later, but not right now. It’s not real.
He tried to laugh it off. Surely it was nothing to worry about. People like to spread lies and fake rumors online.
He shut his phone and set it aside to clear his mind. He stared out through the window and tried to force the thoughts away. He could hear the falling rain outside his balcony but the thoughts racing in his head were overbearing. His thoughts ended up winning as he went right back to his device where he began to dig.
Every corner of the news was spreading the same lie but in different variations. Some were claiming it to be confirmed and other sites said it was as close to a done deal. They surely had no idea what they were talking about. Who were their club sources?
Even if it’s all true, which he knows it’s not - how come every site found out before him? If it was true Armando would’ve told him way before everyone else knew. If it was true he would’ve known way before today because a player doesn’t simply get signed in a day without constant negotiation and back to back talk. Armando would’ve told him, because he loved him and trusted him. They’re all rumors.
(But they weren’t)
He tried to text Armando first.
—-
mando have you seen this
it’s being posted everywhere
—-
Armando hadn’t responded but he’d seen the messages.
—-
mando talk to me
what’s wrong
why aren’t you responding
—-
He began to worry. There was no way Armando had omitted this information from him. There was simply no fucking way he’d do this to him.
Armando's messages were perhaps not getting through or so he wishfully thought. The weather must’ve cut the power in his area or something else.
He tried calling him. The calls were to no avail. He didn’t pick up once, and it was drawing the line. This was all unlike his Armando.
—-
baby why aren’t you picking up
you’re worrying me
are you ok
please just let me know you’re safe
—-
mando❤️
I’m ok, don’t worry
—-
mando
bebe
what’s wrong
is your line not working
is it the news
don’t look at them
they’re stupid rumors
—-
mando❤️
i'm sorry
—-
baby
why are you sorry
what happened
—-
mando❤️
sorry I didn’t tell you sooner
—-
baby
what do you mean
you’re leaving???
since when??
why didn’t you tell me
baby please
Armando I know you’re seeing these
please talk to me or answer the calls
i’m not mad princessa
you know I love you
i can never be mad at you
te amo bebe
amor please don’t leave
talk to me please
i can’t take it anymore
—-
Brian spiraled after the responses ceased. Armando was deliberately ignoring him. He only wanted to talk. He wanted to know everything. Why did he omit this from him? Did he not think he’d receive the news with grace? He had to know he’d support him from the start and they’d work something out.
If Armando wasn’t going to respond, then the best next line of direction would be to go to him. He grabbed his phone and shoved it down his pants, and then he grabbed his keys, rushing towards the door and out the building.
Once out the apartment he was met with the cold wind and the drizzling rain. He’d forgotten completely about the state of the weather and hadn’t gotten himself a sweater. Fuck it - he was too in a rush to care as he was frantically igniting the engine and driving off towards Armando’s direction.
***
Brian arrived at Armando’s home faster than he’s ever driven there or anywhere in his life. He may have broken a few rules to get there but he’d be willing to break them all if it meant he’d get to see him - even through this precarious weather.
He stationed himself in front of the building and exited the vehicle. Drops of rain immediately began dropping on him. The cold was present but the wind only intensified the sensation, making it a bit harder to bear in his sweaterless state.
He pushed forward nonetheless.
He opened the front gate and followed the now wet concrete he knew led to his person. He could see as bundles of snails began slithering their way towards the safeness of the path as he passed by them.
The short little walk felt heavy with every step he took. He arrived at the door halfway drenched from head to toe. He rang the doorbell but also knocked, feeling it necessary in his mind. He waited and waited, standing outside the home and in the rain. He called out his name with another set of frantic knocks.
Once he began to lose hope that the other wasn’t going to open up - the door opened ajar. Armando looked pale and clean, like he’d just stepped out of the shower. But the shower couldn’t remove the puffiness and redness of his eyes, and all Brian wanted to was hold him tight and comfort him.
Armando stepped out but stood away from the rain under the building's cover. His sad eyes aligned with his but he said nothing.
“You’re leaving,” he stated as a matter of fact rather than a question.
Armando’s lips twitched and he nodded solemnly.
The wind howled and the rain began to pour exceedingly in the moments he stood there, mere feet away from the love of his life.
“Why,” he started. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Brian don’t—
“Don’t what. Armando, do you not trust me? Why couldn’t you tell from the beginning? Why did you wait for me to find out this way?”
Armando’s eyes began to water.
“I wanted to tell you,” he gingerly said as he rubbed one of his eyes. “But I couldn’t.”
“¿Por qué no bebe?”
“I was afraid,” he barely heard the whisper from his wobbly lips.
“When the offer first came I - I got scared. I thought we had more time with each other. I didn’t want to r-ruin the last moments we’d have this summer. I didn’t want it to get in the way and fill up every minute of our time.” Armando tears shed and he let them roll freely down his cheeks. “I just wanted the illusion to last Brian. I’m sorry.”
Brian took light steps, stood in front of Armando, and away from the pouring rain. He opened his arms in an invitation. He knew he was drenched and he wanted Armando to voluntarily accept him.
Armando looked up at him and at the gesture. Abruptly, he jumped into his arms and wrapped his own around him. It mirrored the hug Armando had given him just yesterday under the night sky. Except now Armando was hugging a cold and wet Brian compared to a sweaty one.
And now that he thinks about it, all those little signs and looks should’ve made him realize something was troubling him. Yet he pushed them aside with his love laced eyes because everything had seemed fine. Armando made it feel that way. Armando wanted their perfect little summer to never end.
He couldn’t fault him for keeping him in the dark. It may have been selfish of him but he understood. If he were in his shoes he’d probably do the same.
“It’s ok,” he whispered and cooed into the other being.
Armando was fully crying in his shoulder and only stopped for the briefest second to encroach himself better in the corner where his collarbone and neck met.
He tried to console him as he rubbed his back and whispered sweet little nothings.
“It’s ok,” he repeated as many times as he could. “I get it, you were trying to protect yourself. Protect this love we have.”
Armando faced away from his body with his tear stained eyes and his cold ridden reddened cheeks. “How are you so forgiving?”
“How? Because I love you.”
***
Armando’s departure came three days later on a Thursday morning.
But before then, Brian made sure to spend every waking day alongside him. Armando had slept in his home and his bed. They rode to training together everyday. They stood, sat, and ate besides each other and everyone let them because they knew it would be their last. No one questioned them or bothered them with the cheap jokes they were accustomed to.
Romo and Sepu went lenient on Brian when they caught him off guard looking at one person in particular. Diego intentionally picked them as part of his team to keep them together a bit longer. Santi switched seats with Brian during lunch to let the lovers sit aside one another, but claiming the view was better from the other side of the table. Piojo let the couple be when he found them on top of the other at the bottom of a shaded tree. And without a single goofy remark, he left with an apologetic wave.
It was rather sweet of all of them. Brian was thankful and he knew Armando was too.
The final day before he left couldn’t have been more perfect. After a training cut short thanks to Milito, Brian took him to that nice restaurant he planned to take him to before. Armando loved it.
They then went to the secluded park where a street vendor caught Armando’s attention. He bought him the vanilla raspado he wanted as they walked around aimlessly.
To end the day they went to his place where they took their time and fulfilled their desires. They engorged themselves in the other's heat and want. Armando wailed and moaned, taking in everything Brian had to offer. Brian kissed and groaned as he let Armando be the sole captive of his eternal love.
The night was full of passion. A deep passion they hoped would join the other and last them until their next encounter.
Armando left early in the morning to meet up with his family at the airport - his bags having already been packed.
Before he left he embraced him real tight. They kissed, cuddled, and kissed again till their hearts content. It wouldn’t be their last but he wouldn’t be able to hold him and kiss him this way for a while. They continued on until they could no more.
There was not enough time to shower in the love they had. Time would come, and he only wished it would come sooner the moment Armando stepped out of the door and out the seemingly perfect life they had created here.
Brian wished him the best and promised him he’d keep hold of the love he had for him. Because Armando was and will always be his one and only.