Chapter Text
For as long as she had been a Luthor, Lena had been trained–no–conditioned to always be composed. Whether it’s a drink spilling on her dress, an uppity board member trying to mansplain her own company, or an assassination attempt; Lena had long since become a master of always remaining as calm, cool, and collected as one could be.
But right now even her skills are being pushed to their limits.
It all started around 9 on a Friday night.
It had been a good day; the few meetings she’d had were blissfuly short and efficient, she’d had little trouble focusing on her own work, and no one had tried to attack L-Corp, or herself, throughout the entire day. Truly one of the better days Lena had had since relocating to National City
So of course Murphy’s Law dictated that something was bound to happen.
She’d sent Jess home hours ago and was just about to pack up when she heard a thump from outside her window.
Turning away from her desk the brunette saw nothing but the glitter of the city’s skyline, but her curiosity had her out of her seat and onto her balcony before she could think better of it.
Standing at the railing Lena looked about but couldn’t see anything that may have made a noise until she looked down-
Straight into a pair of bright blue eyes.
Lena yelped and jumped back from the railing–though she would deny it until her dying day.
Forcing herself to breathe normally, Lena watched as the eyes–and naturally the head attached to them–began to rise up and over the railing before the entire body of none other than a certain blonde hero landed on her balcony with what Lena could only call a “plop”.
Now, Lena had known, or at the very least suspected, that the sunny reporter was in fact the Girl of Steel; in addition she had a running theory that a great deal of the city’s population knew as well, and were simply too enamored with the blonde to out her. She also understood that there were a myriad of reasons for why the superhero had yet to tell Lena her secret (reasons that ranged from the painless “we haven’t known eachother long” to the heart-wrenching “I am a Luthor”).
Lena had hoped one day Kara would deem her worthy enough to entrust her with her whole identity.
She just never imagined it would be like this.
Because the person who had just staggered onto her balcony–the balcony located several stories above the streets of National City–was most definitely looking less like Supergirl and more like Kara Danvers. The blonde was in her usual work attire of a blue button-up and slacks, but her hair was a mess of braids, her glasses horridly askew, the eyes behind them glassy, and her shirt was half undone revealing the crest of her crime-fighting outfit.
All in all: she looked like a hot mess.
“Lena!” Kara crows joyously. “I found you!”
“You sure did,” Lena replied, smiling at her friend’s antics, though still a bit concerned about her attire. “What brings to L-Corp on such a lovely night?”
The blonde smiled dopily (and didn’t Lena’s heart just melt) at the CEO before seeming to snap out of her mild daze with an ‘oh right’.
“I came to tell you about your eyes!”
“My eyes?” the brunette chuckled.
“Yup!”
“What about them?”
"They’re fantabulous!” Kara slurred, throwing her arms (and nearly the rest of her) in the air and Lena finally noticed the bottle clutched in one of her hands. It was a long, dark blue container, with no label save for a strange symbol embossed onto the glass itself.
The notes she had read on Kryptonians (she might not share her brother’s hatred for aliens but she did share his curiosity) had indicated that the species was incapable of becoming intoxicated on anything cultivated on Earth.
‘That must be some kind of alien alcohol,’ Lena concluded in her head. ‘A strong brew if it’s enough to bypass a Kryptonian’s high metabolism. How much has she had?!’
The CEO was snapped out of her worried musings of a drunk Supergirl unleashed upon the city by said hero beginning to ramble in an admittedly adorable fashion.
“Your eyes are like the twin moons of Zagara. Have you ever been there? It’s this gorgeous planet almost completely covered in thick lush forests. I used to love visiting with my father and sitting in one of the observatories above the canopy and ju-just take in the scenery at night. The moons were the best Lena! You know why?
“Cause-cause they weren’t bluish white like Earth’s moon–no. Not-not that there’s anything wrong with your moon. It’s fine. It’s a good moony-moon. But Zagara’s moons?! Top notch! They’re this greenish color but not like a greeny-green like a leaf or a Green Martian.” The blonde began pacing back and forth on the balcony while her audience tried to keep up with what she was saying. Martians?
“Though I do think J’onn is a nice shade of green, which isn’t something you’d usually think about a person, but it’s true! Anyway, no they aren’t-they’re not white; they’re this like, icy, bluey, kind of green. Just like your eyes! And I was sitting with Monny at-at the bar and we were talking about the planets we’d visited before coming here and which ones we missed the most besides our ho-homes and I thought of Zagara and its moons and how they’re like your eyes and I had to tell you-I had to tell you that, Lena!”
“Tell me that my eyes-“
“That your eyes are like moons and oceans and forests and stars all rolled into one! I had to tell you so I grabbed this bottle here-which is delicious by the way but don’t-don’t drink it cause you’re human and it will kill you and I don’t want that-I grabbed this and I flew here and I’m here and now I’m going to tell you that Lena-“
Kara jolted towards her suddenly and firmly but gently grabbed her shoulders so that she could look Lena straight in the face and say, “Lena, you have the prettiest eyes I have ever seen. Hiccup.”
Two decades worth of training deserted Lena at the sight of the blonde’s serious, if a bit flushed, face. Her mouth fell open slightly as she struggled to comprehend that Kara; Kara the humanoid puppy, Kara the alien goddess, Kara the angel literally flung out of space–decided to fly gods know how far across the city, drunk, just to tell her, Lena Luthor, that she had pretty eyes and wax poetic about said eyes.
‘What is my life?’ she pondered.
So stunned was Lena that she almost didn’t notice Kara release her hold on her shoulders, bid her a slurred but enthusiastic good-bye, and began to amble her way back to the railing like she was going to take off.
Snapping back into the situation, Lena cried out “Wait!”
Kara paused half crouched for take off, promptly falling over, but she remained on the balcony and turned to Lena with a 'yes?' expression on her face.
Concerned at the prospect of the personification of a humanoid wrecking ball flying unchecked through the city (dressed as her mild manner alter ego no less), Lena thought quickly for a way to keep the blonde with her and out of trouble.
“Uh, I…I actually haven’t been to Zagara. Could you, maybe, stay for a while and tell me more?” she asked, almost shyly, her fingers crossed.
She’s immediately glad she asked because at the request Kara absolutely beamed at her, and with no coaxing rose up from the balcony floor to stumble her way towards Lena’s couch, already gushing about the trees and the wildlife “and the flowers, Lena! They have the bestest flowers!”
As she walked by, the brunette noticed that Kara’s cape was in fact half sticking out the back of her shirt, and wondered what she had just gotten herself into.
Three hours and several jugs of water later, Kara finally succumbed to…whatever it was she’d been drinking and fell asleep. Lena had poured the remains of the bottle down the drain as soon as she could get it away from the blonde and she swears it took off a bit of the chrome finish and probably unclogged her plumbing as well.
Situating the reporter as comfortably as she could on the couch (difficult when said reporter can usually only be moved when she wants to be; it was like trying to wrangle a bean-bag filled with lead beads), Lena did the only thing she could do.
She cracked the password on Kara’s phone and called the contact labeled “Alex <3”.
Alex would like to state for the record that she did not sign up for this shit.
(Yes, technically she did when she agreed to work for the DEO but that was before Kara came out and things.)
It was after midnight, she’d finally located Mon-El, drunk and flirting with a blue girl at the alien bar par usual, only to find out that her sister–her baby lightweight of a drinker sister–had taken off from said bar HOURS ago, after having God know how many shots of God knows what.
She had half a mind to take a lead pipe to certain parts of Mon-El’s anatomy. J’onn would understand.
She’d wrestled the half-wit, man baby into her car and is about to call her sister when her screen lit up with Kara’s name and the picture of them snuggled on the couch.
Breathing a sigh of relief she answered, “Kara, thank god. Where the hell are you?!”
Lena flinched. The elder Danvers did not sound happy. She’d probably realized her sister was missing.
“This is Lena, actually, and your sister is currently passed out on the couch in my office.”
“Lena? Couch? How’d you get her phone?” Alex asked, confused.
“I borrowed it because I can’t very well leave a drunk alien passed out on my couch overnight no matter how indestructible she is. The custodians would have a fit.”
“Alien-wha! That’s-she’s not….” Lena can actually feel the moment the agent admits defeat and sighs, “How’d you know?”
“Well, I’ve suspected for a while…your sister is a terrible liar.”
“Don’t I know it,” Alex groused.
“But what really sealed it is the fact that she flew up to my balcony, still mostly dressed as Kara and not Supergirl. Though I will admit her cape sticking out the back of her shirt was absolutely adorable.”
“Oh for the love of…” the older sister sighed and mumbled something about ‘drunk puppies’ and ‘so much paperwork’ before she started speaking to Lena again. “You said she’s passed out on your couch?”
“Yeah, I managed to get her talking about the planets she’d seen before coming to Earth. I didn’t want her flying in this condition; I don’t even want to think about what damaged she may have done just getting here.”
A door slammed on Alex’s end of the call, followed by the roar of an engine.
“I’m on my way right now. Dare I ask, what was she doing at L-Corp anyway?”
Lena blushed; grateful the agent wasn’t actually there to see her.
“Ahem, apparently she and…”Monny”, I think his name was? They were talking and Kara said that my eyes reminded her of the “twin moons of Zagara” and she decided that I absolutely needed to know this so she flew over to tell me just that….only in that very long, very cute, ramblely way that she does.”
The line was silent for a few moments before Alex replied, “…My sister flew halfway across the city to tell you that you have eyes that look like moons?”
“Very pretty moons, apparently,” again, Lena was glad they weren’t face timing; she could feel her face becoming redder and redder.
“And now she’s asleep on your couch.”
“Yes.”
“In your office.”
“Yes.”
“Completely smashed.”
Lena’s patience snapped. Danvers’ women apparently had a knack for making her lose her composure.
“Yes! And I had a heck of a time getting her to stay there, Agent Danvers. Do you know how Kara is when she’s drunk?! She acts like even more of a puppy than usual! One second she’s comparing my skin to these seashells found on planet so-and-so and the next she’s halfway across the room headed towards the balcony, determined to find me a seashell so that I can see for myself! My shoes left skid marks on the floor from where she dragged me along before realizing I’d grabbed her! Skid marks, Danvers!
“And don’t get me started on getting that bottle out of her hands! I still don’t know how she held onto it so hard without breaking it! I do however know that whatever was in it would be worth a fortune if marketed as a drain cleaner.”
“Drain cleaner?”
“Drain cleaner. And then there was the moment she realized she was still dressed as “Kara” and not “Supergirl” so she tried to finish undressing herself. Which would have been fine except that she kept going and very nearly stripped all the way down before I managed to stop her!”
“She didn’t!” Alex gasped.
“She did! I now know that Supergirl flies around saving people while wearing panties with small kittens on them. Kittens, Danvers! Kittens! Do you have any idea how freaking adorable that is! To know that this actual cinnamon roll is in charge of protecting the city?! I could barely restrain myself from hugging her before, never mind while knowing now what an absolute sweetheart she–”
A strange gurgling noise was coming over the line. It took Lena a few seconds to figure out exactly what it was.
“…Agent Danvers. Stop laughing at me right now and come get your stinking cute sister! MY SELF CONTROL CAN ONLY LAST SO LONG, DAMN IT!”