Chapter Text
The circus is a dangerous place, but none of the Aquatos ever really thought about that.
Broken bones, concussions, scrapes, cuts, bruises. You name it, every Aquato had encountered it at least a couple of times. It was a routine inevitability. They took every precaution and managed to avoid injury the best they could, but they rarely ever considered that something more brutal than a fracture could ever occur. Their routines were too meticulously planned out for that, every single failsafe possible put in place. Donatella made sure of that.
So when she suggested to Raz that they do a high-wire act with no net, he didn't doubt for a second that it would be perfectly safe. He agreed to it.
"That's my boy." She said with a beaming grin, ruffling his rarely un-helmeted hair. "It will just be me and you. Not that I don't trust the others, but we are the best balancers. Better safe than sorry, hm?"
And he grinned right back, genuinely looking forward to performing for the first time in a long time.
The transition after Raz ran away and everyone's lives had gotten blown up had not been an easy one, but now things were better than they had been. Augustus was very different, his memories coming back had changed much of his perspective on life and he was much warmer and more willing to talk than he ever had been. Dion and Frazie still picked on Raz, as siblings were wont to do, but Frazie finally felt comfortable enough to use her psychic powers regularly, and Dion had been spending a lot more time with his little brother. Mirtala was now almost the age Raz was when he had run away, and her carefree attitude was starting to give way into something more mature. He hoped that problems wouldn't settle as heavily on her shoulders as they had his. Queepie had barely changed a bit, he still liked his space.
Donatella remained much the same as she had before, too, but the difference now was that she was much more supportive, and a little less controlling. She was still smothering in only a way a mother can be, but she did let Raz have his freedom. Hell, she even let him spend the entire summer at Whispering Rock and the Motherlobe, which was a big step for her, even if she did cry when they dropped him off. Raz could talk to her about a lot more now, and bring up psychic topics, which she didn't shut down immediately. Things with her weren't perfect, but he could tell she was trying.
Raz had missed his family more than he ever knew he could while he was away, but now he was back with them until next summer.
It was nearing the holiday season, and they always upped the ante for that. Hence why Raz and Donatella were now practicing their net-less high wire walk relentlessly. It went without a hitch every time, Raz going first and his mother following after. Both of them were so flawless with their balance that they hardly needed to practice. The act would be perfect.
Neither of them realized how wrong they were for assuming that.
It was the last act of their show, everything had led up to this. Raz wasn't nervous, he had long ago learned how to replace nerves with adrenaline, and he was used to experiencing far more dangerous situations with the Psychonauts. This may as well be make-believe to him. He stepped onto the line as he had practiced a thousand times, feeling a bit of smug satisfaction from the audience gasps. He took another step.
The line slacked in a way it shouldn't have. Raz realized instantly something was wrong, and turned to go back to the platform. His mother's horrified expression let him know his fears were correct. Before he could step back onto the platform, the rope snapped free of its anchor, and Raz dropped. They had been so focused on making sure their balance was foolproof that they didn't stop to think that their old, faithful tightrope may not be.
"Razputin!" He heard his mother screech.
She reached out and caught him by his shirt, but her reach sent her tumbling from the platform sending them both hurtling towards the ground. Raz could have- should have- used levitation to slow them, but the ground was coming faster than he his thoughts could form. Donatella, however, thought fast for the both of them. Mid-air, she managed to wrap her arms around her son and put herself in the way of the impact.
Raz didn't remember the moment they hit the ground. He supposed he was momentarily knocked out, or maybe just too stunned to register what was happening. All he knew was that he woke up with his mom's arms wrapped around him, and she did not wake up.
It was all a blur after that. He felt his dad pull him off of his mother's crumpled form and check him for injury, the horrified audience were rushed out of the tent, Donatella was moved to a more secluded place. She was breathing, thank god, but whatever her injuries were, no one could tell from just looking. She remained unconscious.
Augustus had run off to find a pay phone to call an ambulance, crying so furiously it left a pit of fear in Raz's stomach. Frazie had gone to chase off some lookie-loos, screaming and shouting them off the circus grounds. Dion had swallowed whatever horror he felt in that moment and herded off the two youngest to shield them from the worst of it. He could hear Tala loudly protesting. That left Raz to sit with his mother, feeling useless.
Raz reached out to hold her limp hand. It was a moot gesture for someone who wasn't even awake to feel it, maybe it was more for him that it was for her. "Mom-" His voice came out hoarse, roughed up by the tears he hadn't even noticed had been dripping down his cheeks. "I'm sorry. I should have thought faster, I could have saved you."
He almost expected her to stir, to say it was alright or otherwise rib him with her sharp humor like she always did. But she didn't. She just laid there, looking smaller than Raz had ever seen her, like a baby bird fallen from the nest. It wasn't right for such a looming presence as Donatella Aquato. She was supposed to be bold, boisterous, loud. She was supposed to be his mom, his indestructible mom who stubbornly worked through illness and injury, who was always the one trying to take charge and fix things.
Raz had gotten that bit from her. He had spent all summer helping fix problems, feeling like a hero. And now he felt like just a kid again. What good were his psychic powers if he couldn't even think to use them when they really counted? He just wanted her to wake up. If she was awake, it would all be okay.
His hand drifted to his pocket, to the one thing he always kept on his person out of habit. If she was breathing, that meant that she was still in there, somewhere. He just had to bring her back out.
He took the psi-portal out of his pocket and placed it on his mother's forehead.
Raz was going to get her back, whatever it took.