Chapter Text
Gundham found the egg to be tasteless and the texture akin to rubber.
“Everyone is calling your praises for your companionship,” Sonia informed him as he continued to push his breakfast around his plate.
“Singing,” he muttered.
“Mm-hm,” she acknowledged cheerfully.
“That is… an unlikely turn of events,” Gundham wanted to know more but could not bring himself to ask. If he strained his neck, he could see the purple scarf sticking out of Sonia’s bag. It seemed to be complete, but Sonia had not tried to give it to him. He put his plastic spork down, wondering if real silverware was among the supplies the Future Foundation was sending.
“I am glad you are taking your recovery so seriously,” Sonia continued. Her pen scratched along a notepad. She was working on more translations.
“Would it not be more comfortable to render your tomes elsewhere?”
“Am I bothering you?”
“No,” he seemed to be muttering rather often since he had woken up, “Your presence is… acceptable”.
“Then I do not mind. I like being here,” she sounded impossibly patient.
“But why?”
“I enjoy being in your company. Is that not obvious? I have been told I am overbearing,” she looked up at him, head tilted to the side.
“That is nonsensical.”
“Is it really so difficult to believe?”
Yes.
“Hmph,” Gundham folded his arms.
“As you directed, I will not give up on life. I really took that to heart. And that means not giving up on you either, no matter how much you deny your worthiness.”
There she was again, actually listening to him. Gundham cursed his own obstinance. Could there really be a point in moving forward, with everyone in shambles and so little resolved?
It got easier once Gundham made it through talking with everyone once. That was the upside, as it meant people kept coming back to see him again in the first place.
Koizumi, for some reason, found it necessary to tell him every little thing Saionji did or said that could possibly considered nice. She easily saw through his ruse of feigning sleep. Apparently they were still at a point where not telling Souda he was working too slowly counted as progress. For her part, Saionji asked rather probing questions about his decisions in the funhouse. But her judgmental comments were only half-hearted.
The Impostor returned by himself, and Gundham did not even have to ask. The smug smile and the overgenerous dinner portion told him everything. Ibuki was somehow carving out time in their schedule for band practice. It sounded like it was going terribly for everyone except her. Gundham was still slotted as “first chair triangle”.
“Are you fishing for someone to go off on you?” Kuzuryu snapped after Gundham tried to ask about the gangster’s so-called grief club for the third time. Pekoyama cracked a smile at his annoyance.
Even Souda stopped by to provide updates, which, although they were rather self-centered were surprisingly informative. Significant progress on the islands’ facilities was being made, as he had successfully wrangled an effective work force out of their comrades.
When Owari next checked on him, Gundham apologized to her.
“No need to say sorry to me,” she shrugged, “if Coach says it’s alright, it’s alright.”
“No, I speak pointedly of the grief I caused you,” Gundham clarified.
Owari tilted her head to one side, “Oh… well that’s thoughtful of ya. I was pretty mad at first, but I guess it had as much to do with my own guilt as anything else.” It was very self-aware, coming from her.
“Nonetheless, I regret my part in it.”
“That’s good,” she nodded. She seemed to have gotten over it rather quickly. It was too easy.
“You know, it’s weird, everyone’s obsessed with the simulation killings even though those aren’t the worst murders any of us have done,” Owari’s casual tone and repeated shrug belied the poignancy of her words. Well, Gundham could understand that feeling.
Nidai showed a similarly blase attitude as he chatted about training, chores, communal meals, personal records, and training. But Gundham could not hold that against him, even finding himself a strangely jealous of the trainer’s talent for helping others.
“Do you really harbor no ill will towards me?” Gundham asked him, out of the blue.
“Yeah,” Nidai scratched his head, “Why?”
“It is… illogical.”
“Well, it seems like it doesn’t matter in the bigger picture. I’m guilty of a lot myself. I want to try to help everyone move forward together.”
“Is it not simply a tactic to put the voracious one at ease?”
“For Akane? No, but I suppose you could say I followed her lead. She and Sonia could have very easily turned on each other after we were gone. You saw what happened. But they didn’t, they came out on top. And even though they’re very different they became good friends. Even better that at school, I think. I saw what they had done and it seemed right,” Nidai shrugged, “We all did what we had to do.”
“That can’t be all,” Gundham was flabbergasted.
Nidai laughed once more, “Sometimes it really is that simple.”
“You’re f-fine to leave the hospital, Tanaka. You’re recovering well, just let me know if you have any relapses.”
“Thank you, Tsumiki, your care has been... splendid.”
“Glad to h-help,” she managed to smile at him, “I’m just following the Future Foundation’s instructions.”
“Nonetheless, it is appreciated”
Sonia nudged her.
“You’re welcome,” Tsumiki said, looking straight at him. Gundham nodded back.
“Are the cottages inhabitable?”
“Well, about half of them are,” Sonia explained, “So we’ve been doubling up for the time being.”
“And who is sentenced to be my cellmate?”
Sonia and Tsumiki shared a glance.
“Teruteru.”
He had really drawn the short straw on this one.
Sonia walked with him to his new quarters. She was less chipper than usual, almost resigned, like even her facade was failing her. Gundham sorely wished they could fall back into the easy conversations they had known in school.
“Would you like help getting situated?” Sonia rocked back on her heels.
“No, I require no assistance,” there were no Devas to see to the comfort of; there was nothing to settle in.
“Alright then, well, I suppose you guessed I made this for you,” she pulled the crocheted scarf out of her bag and handed it to him. Gundham took it despite himself.
However, he could not shake his irritation at the gesture, “Why did you wish to replicate a token of what I was in the doomed simulation?”
“I liked who you were in the simulation.”
Gundham had nothing to say to that. She certainly knew how to put a curse on his tongue.
“If there’s anything I can do, do not hesitate to ask,” Sonia wavered before turning away. He could not shake the feeling that he had hurt her. Not wanting to stand outside awkwardly, he faced the inevitable and opened the door.
The short one also seemed to think they were now confidantes. Gundham did not really register anything his new roommate said, instead focusing on the feeling of his new scarf, which he had wrapped around his neck regardless of his misgivings. It was not as smooth as the one he had formerly possessed.
Gundham did not know how long he lasted before he was compelled to escape the chattering of the chef and the stifling air of their shared accommodations. It could not have been long. He wandered towards the corral, perhaps seeking the comfort of the familiar. Hinata approached from the other direction.
“Tanaka,” he nodded, pausing his trek.
“Hinata.”
“I think you should go over to the beach,” it was not a suggestion.
“Why?” Gundham bristled.
“Because… you should,” Hinata repeated. There was that strange look in his eyes again. Like he knew things. There was no arguing with it.
“Very well, then,” Gundham agreed after a moment. He sighed and kept walking past the corral.
At first glance there was nothing there, but he quickly spotted a spec of dark green under a palm tree that was out of place. Sonia. On the far side of the beach.
He began to trudge across the sand and found he still tired easily. He kept going. As he drew closer, he could see Sonia was curled up into a ball. Closer still, and she was shaking with sobs.
He panicked internally. He wanted to run and get Akane or Ibuki. But Hinata had sent him here on purpose. For some reason… well, Sonia had been looking after him so maybe it was his turn to take care of her. But was he up to the task?
Gundham sat down next to her, knowing she had sensed his presence. She pulled her legs tighter against her chest. She looked so alone. For a moment, he was frozen, not knowing what to do. She was right, he knew; this was all they had and they had to give it everything they could. Whatever they deserved, whatever was happening in the outside world, this mattered, here and now. He would once again do what must be done.
Gundham summoned all of his resolve, trying to quiet his racing thoughts. All at once, he picked Sonia up and placed her onto his lap.
“Gundham? You don’t have to-”
“Do not fret on account of me, my dark queen. You need make no pretenses. Not to me.”
This seemed to calm her, at least enough for her to return to her silent tears. She bunched up his shirt in her fists. Gundham controlled his breathing. It was an odd feeling, being so close, but he seemed to be handling it alright. He dared to reach out and stroke Sonia’s hair.
“Do you desire to speak of it?” he asked.
“I-” Sonia sniffled, “I don’t know if I can.”
“Whenever you wish,” Gundham felt his confidence slowly rising. She whimpered a little more.
“I guess it wouldn’t be a surprise that I’m homesick. More than anything I want to return and help fix what I broke. But I know I can’t. And the worst part is… in Novoselic, they don’t even blame me. They focus on how I was brainwashed or just refuse to believe it was really me at all, like it was some sort of impersonator.”
“I imagine… that cuts quite deep.”
“My whole life, I was raised to think of Novoselic first. But instead I lead to its downfall.”
“It is ill-fated that your position was taken advantage of. But that is no fault of yours. Any one of us could have wreaked the same havoc.”
“But you didn’t.”
He knew they could not fight the lingering miasma, “It is over now. We will do the right thing and find a way to help everyone.” He held her tighter.
Sonia kept sobbing. Gundham rubbed her back. Every so often he would whisper apologies. He lost track of how long they sat in the sand as the sun inched towards the horizon. He found, however, that he no longer felt physically uncomfortable. Even as Sonia clung desperately to him and each new wave of tears flowed, he stayed firm. He allowed himself to feel the smallest twinge of pride. He was holding Sonia, comforting her- he was doing something right. In that moment, he had not given up. He could continue to fight.
In time, Sonia exhausted herself. Her breathing evened out, and Gundham thought she had fallen asleep. But when he glanced at her, she was looking up at him.
“Gundham?” her voice was barely above a whisper.
“Mm?”
“You called me my dark queen,” she pulled at the scarf.
“…So I did. Is this amenable to you, Sonia?” he knew his face was flushed.
She laid her head on his chest, eyes still watery, but holding a hint of life, “It is, my supreme overlord.”
When Gundham could no longer sustain the contact, they walked slowly along the water’s edge.
“It is odd,” Sonia mused, looking out over the ocean, enjoying the gentle breeze off the water, “sometimes I let myself think of school, just before all this started. I think it was the happiest time of my life.”
“Mine as well,” Gundham agreed.
“I don’t know if I’ll ever understand how it was turned into something so awful.”
“It is… disturbing.”
“But I can’t let those memories go. They’re much too dear.”
Gundham thought of a certain recollection that had partially returned to him, “Did I… act as your escort to a fair?”
Sonia giggled, her eyes regaining more of their once familiar shine, “Well, I wanted to attend an ordinary Japanese school festival and you were so kind as to accompany me. You wore the most adorable pinstripe suit in Novoselic colors and this matching scarf and-”
“If I recall correctly, Saionji determined I looked like Beetlejuice.”
Sonia laughed fully this time, “She did say that, didn’t she? Well, I don’t think it dampened our fun.”
“I should hope not,” Gundham reflected, “You and I lived in our own world, then.”
“Yes, it was truly our own.”
Sonia’s smile did not fade. For the first time since he had awoken, Gundham thought it to be genuine. The light in her eyes remained even as they heard a siren go off in the distance. Together, they turned towards the Future Foundation building.
Komaeda was awake.