A Certain Dog

Series Metadata

Creators:
,
Series Begun:
2017-06-26
Series Updated:
2019-06-18
Description:

Harry Hart should not be allowed within fifty feet of tiny runty puppies because he loses all reason. When he finds an abandoned teacup schnauzer searching for food in the bins, he immediately decides he’s going to be its mother and brings it home to love forever. Obviously he doesn’t stop to consider the fact that he’s out of the country more often than not so all the actual looking after is going to fall on Merlin, who has a deep disdain for people who make their dogs wear clothes and thinks anything smaller than a wolfhound is basically a pointless rodent.

Meanwhile, Eggsy is floundering on probation after grassing up Dean and his thugs in return for escaping jail time for his part in all their previous criminal activity. Life is feeling pretty bleak and directionless - until he meets a ridiculous eccentric couple and their amazing little dog, and is hired as its nanny.

Contains deeply inappropriate use of the phrases "good boy", "bad boy", and "where’s your squeaky balls?"

Notes:

Verse For a Certain Dog

 

Such glorious faith as fills your limpid eyes,
Dear little friend of mine, I never knew.
All-innocent are you, and yet all-wise.
(For Heaven's sake, stop worrying that shoe!)
You look about, and all you see is fair;
This mighty globe was made for you alone.
Of all the thunderous ages, you're the heir.
(Get off the pillow with that dirty bone!)

A skeptic world you face with steady gaze;
High in young pride you hold your noble head,
Gayly you meet the rush of roaring days.
(Must you eat puppy biscuit on the bed?)
Lancelike your courage, gleaming swift and strong,
Yours the white rapture of a winged soul,
Yours is a spirit like a Mayday song.
(God help you, if you break the goldfish bowl!)

"Whatever is, is good" - your gracious creed.
You wear your joy of living like a crown.
Love lights your simplest act, your every deed.
(Drop it, I tell you- put that kitten down!)
You are God's kindliest gift of all - a friend.
Your shining loyalty unflecked by doubt,
You ask but leave to follow to the end.
(Couldn't you wait until I took you out?)

Dorothy Parker

Stats:
Words:
32,269
Works:
2
Complete:
No
Bookmarks:
193

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