DJpwp
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“are you still going” The text on Ethan's phone screen read.
“Yeah, couldn't disappoint Jeremy by backing out.” Not that he would have even if Jeremy hadn't wanted to come to the concert.
“better have an alibi when the human bites the big one”
“You could have just come with me.”
“ethan youre not taking the vampire thing seriously enough” Heisenberg warned.
“I've told you, she would never be able to get away with killing people with meet and greet tickets.” Not content to leave the subject alone, he typed out and sent a follow-up. “It would be a dumb idea if she's trying to stay undercover.” Ethan had won the tickets to his favorite jazz act–Miss D and the Pallboys–from a radio giveaway a few weeks prior. He would have brought Heisenberg along with him, but there was just one minor hiccup with that idea: The eponymous “Miss D” was Heisenberg's older, and ostensibly estranged sister. Cue him bitching about her every waking moment for the last week, and Ethan inviting his coworker Jeremy to the concert instead.
“im not coming to save you when this all blows up in your face”
Smarmy asshole.Series
- Part 5 of Bad Dates Jukebox
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Looking at himself in the bedroom mirror–the bathroom door was shut, the fan cycling out the moisture–Ethan decided he looked good enough. He wore a long sleeve, navy button-up with his darkwash jeans and thought he looked a little too monochrome, but this wasn't a date date with Chris. Though he wouldn't say no if the offer ever actually happened.
He was a young thirty-four! Freewheeling and ready for excitement again! He could bang two hot bears if he wanted to!
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The dark greenery peeled back, and the drive straightened out as it approached an expansive antebellum mansion. Spanish moss hung from the branches of old, gnarled oak trees lining either side of the gravel; it made Ethan's skin prickle. He didn't know what he expected Heisenberg's abode to look like, but it wasn't this sprawling, French colonial nightmare.
He pulled into the circle drive, a copper-orange Dodge Charger parked nearly to the Greek-columned veranda. Shutting off the engine, Ethan opened the door, dress shoes crunching on loose rocks. The estate loomed over him in the harsh sunlight, beckoning him onward as much as its sinister air bid him to leave.Series
- Part 4 of Bad Dates Jukebox
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The sounds of nature surrounded him with its bliss as he hiked past an elderly pair, fully kitted-out in their watcher's regalia; binoculars hung from their necks like Ethan's, but that was where the similarities stopped. You see, they were here for the bird sanctuary's on paper delights. Migratory songbirds flitted from tree-to-tree, filling the air with their melodious voices and colorful feathers. This couple, and so many others dressed like them, took notes in their journals and posted in local Facebook groups about what they saw. Ethan, however, and a whole host of other people hiking off the beaten trail were here for other activities.
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Ethan knows he died, but he's unfortunately unable to rest in peace. His consciousness is still active inside the records of the mutamycete. He's not been back since the Dulvey incident, but it's not just Eveline and the Bakers anymore.
After a few years, a new location of memories has appeared on the horizon and Ethan is drawn to it. Before long he finds himself trapped inside, and to make matters weirder, the puzzling house has a secret in its basement. As Ethan finds out, this is true in both in the records and in the world of the living. Somehow, against all odds, Ethan Winters is alive again. -
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“You said you wanted a smoke.” He shrugged like this wasn't an obvious attempt to curry favor! It was so blatant, so unobfuscated, and so amateur it was obscene! The human was so dull he wasn't even capable of schmoozing properly!
“What do you know! I did!” He would play along, pretend to be bought just as he had to pretend everything else in their relationship. He popped the cigarette between his lips, just to feel it in his mouth. That alone was soothing to his nerves, but he really was jonesing to light up. Ignoring the buffoon as he rifled through his bag, Phillippe went to the kitchen and ignited the burner.Series
- Part 1 of Look Outside/Inside
Recent series
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A series based around terrible Craigslist dating experiences and comedic music. Ethan might not think any of this is funny, but Heisenberg sure does.
- Words:
- 166,428
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 16
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- Words:
- 8,417
- Works:
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Recent bookmarks
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virtual insanity by BronzePlates
Fandoms: Iron Lung (2026), Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
04 Jul 2026
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Simon just irradiated 3 people and got dropped back into the blood ocean. He'd love to wallow in his mistakes, but there's something shifting just behind the wall...
Ryland Grace does not know that "Ryland Grace" is his name, nor does he know where he is or who the hell this scrappy man is next to him.
(Freshly amnesia-d Grace appears in the SM-13, and now they BOTH have to deal with it)
Series
- Part 1 of Say Grace
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 44,038
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Comments:
- 1,625
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- 4,853
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Bookmarked by DJpwp
04 Aug 2026
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gracerocky nsfw art dump by kj_symes
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
31 May 2026
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Collection of my art featuring Grace with (mostly) Ortiz!Rocky crushing his ass and cock into dust
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The Astrobiology Immersion Program by startingatmidnight
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
10 May 2026
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It's not every day you wake up with five arms and no eyes, but Ryland Grace stopped having normal days a very long time ago.
Series
- Part 1 of The Astrobiology Immersion Program
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 48,280
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Comments:
- 2,957
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- 13,253
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- 4,318
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- 146,090
Bookmarked by DJpwp
30 May 2026
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After years of living in a post-Miranda world, Ethan still feels guilty about never searching for Mia. Despite having succeeded in saving his daughter and living an idealistic life with Karl, that guilt eats at him.
Even if for a moment.
When he lets it slip to The Duke, the merchant's good intentions, introspective questions, and time altering powers combine to give present-Ethan a not-so-good-very-bad-time back in the Village.
And past-Ethan, well, he gets to enjoy the idealistic lifestyle present-Ethan was doubting.
Bookmarked by DJpwp
25 Nov 2024
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It was weird, right? It was definitely weird to be invited by your new friend with benefits to their estranged mother's funeral.
Well...Ethan supposed there were worse ways to get to know someone.
(or, ethan and heisenberg get to know each other the old fashioned way--by using each other as a shield for their family baggage.)
Bookmarked by DJpwp
03 Sep 2024