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“I feel like—a meteor crashed into my house and I’m the only one who can see it. I feel like a sketch on a piece of parchment instead of a real person. I feel like I will curse the next person who tells me to ‘just enjoy it’.”
Hermione never thought she would be a solo parent. No one told her that it would be boring, and devastating, and that she would be filled with so much joy that she might burst any second.
No one told Draco he'd feel the same way.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,392
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 5
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- 491
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- 3,296
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Bookmarked by Drarryconvert
24 Oct 2025
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And thus began a very complicated and unideal state of affairs in which Draco couldn’t ask whether the world-ending, all-consuming randiness he felt all day every day from that point on was a symptom of his magical fake-real (but mostly fake) pregnancy and something that she was also experiencing, or simply the logical progression of his hithertofore unacknowledged obsession with Hermione Granger.
Or, Draco has couvade syndrome (the magical version!) thrust upon him.
Bookmarked by Drarryconvert
24 Oct 2025
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“In my humble opinion there’s only three things that men should be and that is bloody, slutty, and pathetic.” And, on a good day, Draco Malfoy can be all three.
When war heroine Hermione Granger and Azkaban-tattooed war criminal Draco Malfoy are forced to wed as part of Shacklebolt’s controversial Reconciliation Act, they openly fight the match and each other—their public brawls breathlessly reported by the press.
Secretly, a deeply traumatized Draco delights in Hermione’s attention and pines for a real marriage with her—even as her forced proximity to the Black family magic irritates the cursed scar Bellatrix left on her arm, reminding her why she can never truly trust or forgive him. Then Hermione discovers that Draco’s blood will soothe the scar . . . and Draco is willing to trade his blood for her body.
(With post-war blood purity politics, black market potioneers, Pansy Parkinson’s career advice, the Malfoys blackmailing Hermione’s Wizengamot opposition, BDE Neville Longbottom hunting Death Eaters, a slutty Theo Nott serving as Draco’s right-hand man, and Crookshanks loose in Malfoy Manor.)
Series
- Part 1 of THE BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC SERIES
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 195,969
- Chapters:
- 21/21
- Comments:
- 7,306
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- 28,867
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- 11,440
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- 1,696,004
Bookmarked by Drarryconvert
22 Oct 2025
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"The way that you can tell a person is good is by how well they make things right again after they’ve been bad."
-John Steinbeck, East of Eden
Hermione Granger had found a semi-satisfactory sense of solace after the war in the best way she knew how: immersing herself in the muggle world and avoiding the people and places that triggered emotions she'd long since suppressed. Until one night when a familiar head of platinum hair is wheeled through the doors of the ICU on her night shift, bleeding, unconscious, and forever shattering the walls she'd built around herself.
Years later, she's still putting the pieces back together.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 127,410
- Chapters:
- 38/?
- Comments:
- 429
- Kudos:
- 392
- Bookmarks:
- 280
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- 22,215
Bookmarked by Drarryconvert
21 Oct 2025
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Nothing spookier than falling for Malfoy.
Every Halloween needs tricks, treats, and Theo Nott’s idea of entertainment, which is usually trouble.
A masquerade with masks charmed to conceal.
Drinks charmed to lower inhibitions.
Games of magically enforced Truth or Dare.
Chaos is inevitable.Hermione expects polite small talk and thinly veiled nonsense. Instead, she finds herself laughing, dancing, and—Merlin help her—kissing a stranger at midnight. The kiss comes with terms: a month at Theo’s mercy.
Theo isn’t finished, and neither is the bond. Which is how the Ministry’s brightest witch and its most insufferable prosecutor end up elbow-deep in pumpkin guts at a Muggle festival, dodging haunted houses, spiked cider, horror marathons, and feelings far scarier than ghosts.
Because sometimes the trick is the treat.
Bookmarked by Drarryconvert
02 Oct 2025