I_Regret_Everything

Qifrey from Witch Hat Atelier



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  1. Rec 74

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    "I have survived international conspiracies. I have navigated minefields. I can handle a five-pound orange domestic shorthair."
    "Can you, though?" you tease, leaning back and watching him with a playful, expectant look.
    "Because so far, the score is Cheeto: two, Leon:zero."

    ──────•✦•──────

    Leon falls victim to the cat distribution system.

    As an emergency vet, you have strict rules about giving out your personal number to clients. But when a soaking wet, broad-shouldered man walks into your clinic holding a shivering neonate kitten like it's a live grenade, you make an exception. Strictly for cat emergencies, of course.

    (It does not stay strictly for cat emergencies. Not when he keeps using "suspicious sneezes" as an excuse to see you)

    Language:
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    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    288
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    16 May 2026

  2. Rec 44

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    Leon is getting too old for this shit. He is (somehow) a full fifty years old. And he’s been wading into bloodsoaked warzones to fight monsters for thirty years. At this point, very little surprises him anymore. But falling through a blood puddle and waking up in a Victorian gothic nightmare is pushing it.

    But nonetheless, it’s familiar. Monsters stalk the streets, the smell of blood so thick he can taste it.

    Leon sighs, rubbing his face. “Just another Tuesday.”

    Or, Leon S. Kennedy post Resident Evil Requiem gets dropped into the city of Yharnam. It goes better and about as bad as you think. (No knowledge of Bloodborne required!)

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    134
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    17 Jun 2026

  3. Rec 60

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    Our Home Café was meant to be yours alone—a quiet place built from grief, old recipes, and the love your grandparents left behind.

    But when survivors from a world full of monsters begin finding their way through your door, the café becomes something more.

    You cannot speak, but through warm tea, lemon cookies, handwritten notes, and patient silence, you offer what the world so rarely gives: comfort without conditions.

    And slowly, you realize the café no longer belongs only to you.

    It belongs to them, too.

    A home for everyone who thought they had lost the right to have one.

    Language:
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    55,388
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    75
    Kudos:
    236
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    60
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    3,477

    04 Jun 2026

  4. Rec 31

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    Ada Wong found you the night you smiled at death.

    Years later, the girl she spared is gone, buried beneath black fabric, loaded weapons, and a name whispered like a warning: Noir.

    Sent to Spain under Wesker’s orders, your mission is simple. Retrieve the sample. Assist only if necessary. Keep Leon S. Kennedy from getting in the way.

    Leon, unfortunately, is very good at getting in the way.

    He does not trust you. He should not. You are masked, armed, evasive, and far too familiar with secrets to be harmless. But Spain has a way of forcing enemies into each other’s blind spots, and somewhere between gunfire, monsters, and the things neither of you are willing to say, distrust begins to feel dangerously close to understanding.

    You were trained to survive without wanting anything.

    Then Leon says your name, and you come when called.

    Or...

    YOU'RE A DOWN BAD MERCENARY FOR LEON S. KENNEDY !!

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    3/?
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    160
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    31
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    17 May 2026

  5. Rec *

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    “Plastics.” You shrug one shoulder. “Not exactly the specialty you want during the apocalypse.”
    Leon stares at you.
    “You’re telling me the only doctor left alive in this hospital specializes in nose jobs?”
    You don't dignify that with a response.

    ──────•✦•──────

    Statistically speaking, a plastic surgeon is not the most useful doctor during a zombie outbreak. Unless a zombie needs a face lift.
    Unfortunately, a bioterror attack hits your hospital anyway.
    Now you’re stuck surviving a viral outbreak with a tired government agent who keeps getting injured and showing up at your apartment like a very dangerous stray cat.

    Language:
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    Chapters:
    12/12
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    09 May 2026