Rottentoast
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Ben Linus wants to adopt a rabbit. First, he'll have to convince the bald man who works at the shelter that he's worthy.
Bookmarked by Rottentoast
10 Oct 2026
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“Jeez, okay, fine! Yes,” he admitted, nobly and honourably and definitely not with a pout, “perhaps I’m somewhat mildly in want of entertainment right now. Sue me!”
He heard Healy huff out a low laugh, one that seeped through the phone line to skate down each notch of March’s spine.
“And you called me for that?”
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or: it’s late. it’s hot. march can’t sleep. clearly, the only logical solution is to call his business partner at one in the morning.
y’know. like buddies do.Bookmarked by Rottentoast
30 Aug 2026
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“…You serious?” Healy scoffed, disbelief nestled into the edges of his face. “Come on, March, that’s-“
“An in-depth investigation tactic,” March finished for him, brain too buzzed to think about any potential implications right now, “I work best when I’m in the zone.”
“And you want to get in the zone of someone I’m… Wooing?”
“You make it sound weird.”
Healy started to smile. Because of course he fucking did. “It is weird, March.”
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or: healy, supposedly, has more skill than march in the seduction department. like any seasoned p.i. worth their salt, march investigates this claim. thoroughly.
Bookmarked by Rottentoast
30 Aug 2026
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Blackmail. Illegal porn. Undercover at a gay bar. The Nice Guys sure are at it again.
“Porn? I can throw a rock in this neighborhood and I’m gonna break the window of a porn store.”
March gestured anxiously, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Healy paused. “Ohhhhh. The nasty stuff. Whips and handcuffs. Girls and animals.”
“Close,” March said, grimacing. He really, really didn’t want to have to explain this. “Think more like…. Disco.”
“Disco?” Healy raised an eyebrow. “What, like the queer music? You think the back room of that store is full of porn for… For disco fans.” He nodded thoughtfully a couple of times. “And you’re an expert about this?”
For a second the whole world went white around the edges and March thought he might pass out. He was too sober for this conversation. What exactly had Healy noticed that morning, how obvious exactly had his full-body reaction to Healy’s hand on his neck been? “I was a happily married man!” March said, and as soon as it came out of his mouth he knew it was wrong. Too fast, too high-pitched, too loud.
Incriminating.
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Bookmarked by Rottentoast
23 Jul 2026
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Chemical experiments go awry at Baker Street, leaving Holmes incapacitated and Watson charged with being his hands. Against Watson's advice Holmes takes on a case of burglary and murder, all the while totally dependent on his companion. This new level of intimacy brings with it a slew of suppressed feelings which become increasingly hard to ignore.
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Bookmarked by Rottentoast
10 Jun 2026