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  1. Rec *

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    Shane Hollander was the number one draft pick and is now captain of the Boston Raiders. Ilya Rozanov quit hockey after his mother died and now owns a bookshop in Boston. When Shane moves into a new apartment down the street from One Good Memory, he finds more than just a convenient place to grab a new book.

    Or...Shane is lonely and closeted and reads a lot; Ilya is charmed and quotes books at him.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    189,960
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    9,467
    Kudos:
    11,380
    Bookmarks:
    5,157
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    543,913

    01 Sep 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “Please,” he whispered, “just tell me what the real problem is.”

    “Did Rozanov call you a few weeks ago? From Russia? After his father passed?” his mom asked.

    The lie rushed out of him on reflex,

    “No, we don’t talk. Why would we?”

    “There’s a recording, Shane.”

    OR Everyone learns what Ilya said on the phone call from Russia before Shane does

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,819
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    196
    Kudos:
    3,468
    Bookmarks:
    331
    Hits:
    25,283

    13 Aug 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    N g

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    A knee injury ends Shane Hollander's nineteen-year NHL career.

    Ilya Rozanov keeps checking in.

    Shane pencils in "big gay midlife crisis" between physiotherapy sessions.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    63,908
    Chapters:
    9/10
    Comments:
    2,901
    Kudos:
    7,719
    Bookmarks:
    3,712
    Hits:
    229,461

    12 Aug 2026

  4. Rec *

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    Five years ago, Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov quietly went their separate ways. They handled their heartbreak differently. Shane cut off his family and friends and focused only on hockey, not that it helped, his game has totally fallen apart. Ilya had the support of the Centaurs, even if they didn't know why they were supporting him.

    But when Ilya announces his retirement at the end of the next season, it shakes Shane back to reality. He has one season left to play against the man he still loves; and then, would he ever see him again? As Shane starts to piece his life back together, the biggest missing piece is still Ilya.

    Ilya had planned to just enjoy the last season he'd play of professional hockey and obviously try to win another cup. But when Shane reaches back out, he has much more to consider. He never expected to talk to Shane again, but he can't deny that it's everything he's wanted in the last five years.

    Can they salvage what they had? Should they even try? How can Shane and Ilya be a part of each other's lives again?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    134,160
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Comments:
    2,001
    Kudos:
    9,238
    Bookmarks:
    3,860
    Hits:
    368,429

    16 Jul 2026

  5. Rec *

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    Summary

    Ilya let out a quiet laugh, shaking his head. “I want to be perfect for you, Shane. To make up for all the time we lost.”

    “I don’t want perfect,” Shane said quietly, stroking Ilya’s cheek. “I want something real. Something that we fight to make work, because we want it so much. Because being together is so much fucking better than being without each other.”

    ***

    Ten years ago, Shane and Ilya loved each other in secret and let each other go anyway.

    Now Shane, captain of the Ottawa Centaurs, is a single dad to four-year-old Ollie, and good at pretending he doesn’t think about the man he lost when they were younger and terrified of the fallout of being caught. Then one chance meeting turns into drinks, lingering looks, old feelings, and suddenly Ilya Rozanov is everywhere again.

    Some things, it turns out, never really leave you.

    As Shane and Ilya fall back into each other’s lives - and into something softer, steadier, and openly theirs this time — they realise maybe they’re finally ready for the life they used to dream about.

    Or: two hockey players who were each other’s first love reconnect ten years later and slowly build the family they always wanted.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    114,785
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Comments:
    3,250
    Kudos:
    9,471
    Bookmarks:
    3,363
    Hits:
    326,763

    02 Jul 2026