Tjthehuman
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Summary
He wishes he didn’t know. Oh, fucking hell, how he wishes he didn’t know.
His life would be so much easier, so much more straight forward and less goddamn distracting if he didn’t know.
But no. Oh, no, he just had to ask the bloody smart-mouthed, rat-arsed peasant, to join him in the fucking baths.
And now Hans is being fucking haunted.
- In which Hans makes an unexpected discovery about Henry, and it throws him for a loop.-
Bookmarked by Tjthehuman
14 Jul 2026
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withdraw not your heart by eldritchcow for MarlinGot
Fandoms: Kingdom Come: Deliverance (Video Games)
25 Jun 2026
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Summary
Sir Hans Capon, Lord of Pirkstein and heir to the seat of Rattay and Polna, has never once wondered what it would be like to kiss a man.
Except. Well.
There was that one time.
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Hans and Henry play a dare game with the Devil's Pack, with varied results.
- Language:
- English
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- 28,770
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- 1/1
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Bookmarked by Tjthehuman
07 Jul 2026
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Command Performance by ZehWulf
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
22 Jul 2023
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Summary
"Would you perhaps like to watch with me, and then we could move somewhere else after? Where I would be able to give you my undivided attention?"
Crowley's grin bloomed along with the growing anticipation in their belly. "Who says I'm looking for your undivided attention?" they drawled and reached into their jacket pocket to pull out the little remote that controlled the butterfly bullet tucked in their knickers. "I can take care of myself, if it comes down to it."
The way Aziraphale's gaze immediately flitted to their crotch, eyes wide, was immensely gratifying. A flush bloomed up over his cheeks. "You have…?" he breathed.
"I'm all kitted out. Don't need much attention at all. Whatever you can spare would be perfectly fine. And if you wanted to borrow a hand or the like if you 'feel so moved'…" They waggled the fingers of their free hand enticingly. "I'd be glad to assist."
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Crowley and Aziraphale run into each other (complete coincidence, Crowley swears) at a burlesque/sex show at the Garden, and a lovely time (and absolutely zero existential crises) is had by all.
Series
- Part 4 of The Garden of Delights
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The military truck with a red cross on its side jolted with every bump and pothole in the pathetic excuse for a road, speeding through the dense tropical forest, weaving between tangled vines.
"Fuck, bitch, drive more carefully, you’re not hauling rocks!" Samuel snarled, slamming his fist against the partition separating the driver’s cabin from the back, where the wounded soldiers lay.
He winced at the sudden flare of pain—his own right side was bleeding badly. His arm bore bullet wounds, and his leg was shredded with shrapnel from an explosion.
Series
- Part 3 of Rules of Engagement
Bookmarked by Tjthehuman
01 Jul 2026
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After Dunk accidentally gelds Aerion during the Trial of the Seven, Maekar asks him to take responsibility for the aftermath. Dunk quickly finds he is much more inclined than he was aware.
Bookmarked by Tjthehuman
18 Jun 2026