badlyshuffleddeck
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Summary
Rumi looks at Zoey and gives her a small smile.
“Between you who’s graduated in, what was it, suckin’ and fuckin’, and you—” She leans slightly to stare at Mira, “—who probably can’t even remember the number of girls and occasional guys she’s slept with this year…” Mira shrugs with a smug and annoyingly sexy smirk. “…maybe you could help me? Get less… boring?”
“You want us to teach you how to be freaky in bed,” Mira says, voice flat.
“I—I guess I am, yeah?"OR
Rumi's sex life is boring and she asks her best friends for help.
Bookmarked by badlyshuffleddeck
31 Aug 2026
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Sydney thinks that if she found out she was pregnant a little earlier she probably wouldn’t have gone through with it. Like, if she found out before her landlord changed the locks on her apartment, or before the bank sent her all those red letters, or before the pasta dried up, she’d probably have just taken herself to Planned Parenthood, popped the pills and charged it to the game. But as it is, the two blue lines appear on the stick during the worst months of her life, the first months of the pandemic when she’s unemployed and shit scared that her dad is going to get coronavirus and die. And when she sees them, she just thinks: well, this might as well happen. She was a disappointment before. What’s one more thing?
Before she meets Carmy, Sydney has a baby.
Series
- Part 1 of child with a child pretending
- Language:
- English
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- 12,482
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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Bookmarked by badlyshuffleddeck
02 Jul 2026
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"You two should try it."
To Mira's humiliation, Rumi recovered first.
"Try what?"
Somewhere along the line, Zoey's bright, sunny grin had taken a sharp turn into mischief; now, with her glass tugging her lower lip down and the tip of her tongue resting on its edge, it was downright predatory.
"Each other."
- or -
Pastry Chef Kang Mira learns to tolerate rival chef and sommelier Ryu Rumi with a little help from a very pretty stranger.
Bookmarked by badlyshuffleddeck
17 Jun 2026
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Rumi is taking too long to catch on to her roommates' advances, so Zoey leverages behavioral psychology to accelerate the process.
OR
That cold open from The Office where Jim trains Dwight to ask for Altoids, but instead of Jim it's ZoeMira and instead of Dwight it's Rumi and instead of Altoids it's makeouts.
Bookmarked by badlyshuffleddeck
13 Jun 2026
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Summary
Secrets mean that she's still safe. That she hasn't ruined her only chance at fixing herself yet.
So when Rumi begins having less-than-appropriate thoughts about her bandmates, it's just another thing she adds to the shelf.
They were nothing more than intrusive thoughts at first.
Everyone gets those. Who hasn't accidentally imagined their friends in a sexual context at least once? It happens, and she knows it doesn't mean anything. Mira and Zoey are objectively incredibly attractive, it can easily be explained as a completely normal compulsion.
So life goes on. Things are normal, and every now and again Rumi thinks about fucking her friends.
Bookmarked by badlyshuffleddeck
10 Mar 2026