murdocked
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Third-wheeling Ricky and Gyuvin on their amusement park date isn’t Gunwook’s idea of the perfect Saturday, and that's not even considering his newfound fear of rides. But when Gyuvin points to the boy running the rollercoaster, Gunwook knows he has to talk to him. Even if it’s the last thing he does.
(Or, Gunwook is terrified of rides, but can be brave if it means getting to talk to Matthew.)
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Bookmarked by murdocked
23 Dec 2025
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The boy is shuffling in the next bunch of ride goers, counting by twos with his index and middle finger. It’s hot, Gunwook thinks. He then shakes his head, because his standards can’t include counting by twos.
He knows he sounds desperate. He’s gesticulating like Gyuvin, for god’s sake.
“Sorry,” Matthew is flushed walking back into the room, pink sitting high on his cheeks. “Gia is strict with her schedule.”
“No worries, I am too,” Gunwook says and then closes his eyes for a second. Because what.“Make a wish,” he says, holding it out for Gunwook to blow on. This is stupid. He needs to be euthanized.
He’s twenty years old; this is his first time liking someone seriously and logically he knows the gaping maw of his chest is universal. Even though it feels cataclysmic and all-consuming to him, Matthew has probably done this so many times before.
So, Gunwook aims for casual.
“I only went on one ride that day,” Gunwook offers with a shy smile. He speaks in half-truths, because he knows his body will betray him anyway. His face has always been too expressive, body language too open. But for Matthew, he wants to be cool. It makes him feel sick.His inexperience makes his hands shake, his palms sweat, and he doesn’t want Matthew to see him the way he sometimes sees himself.
They’re already only inches apart. They’re always only inches apart.
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baby's first fandom by ghostpokemon (crispycrayon)
Fandoms: ZEROBASEONE | ZB1 (Korea Band)
17 Dec 2025
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Taerae @shinsoukoku
This is to user @rizzmaxxer3000 specifically — you offend me with your half-hearted attempts to destroy my reputation.⤷ Matty @rizzmaxxer3000
dude bye is this like your first time on the internet or something? -
the ex of my ex is my...boyfriend? by waifuprime
Fandoms: ZEROBASEONE | ZB1 (Korea Band)
01 Nov 2025
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In which Matthew finds the most convoluted way to get a boyfriend.
Bookmarked by murdocked
19 Dec 2025
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Matthew doesn’t understand it either. He doesn’t understand cheating. Period. But he especially doesn’t understand cheating on someone like Gunwook! Exclamation point.
Matthew scratches the back of his head and tries to clarify. “We weren’t really like that.”
Gunwook raises a brow and leans back in his chair, arms crossed. “What do you mean by ‘like that?’”
“We weren’t dating or exclusive or…anything like that,” Matthew replies, voice getting smaller. He belatedly realizes that finding out your boyfriend of three years didn’t quite leave you for another man, but just jeopardized your entire relationship to regularly cheat and hook up with one, might actually be worse.
Gunwook looks like he’s coming to the conclusion that it’s worse."We—my roommate and I, that is—have a pretty comfy couch if you ignore the burnt patch on one of the cushions from a cooking mishap. I slept on it all finals week, and it only slightly still has the burnt popcorn smell. I realize that’s not exactly a ringing endorsement, but it gets the job done.” He’s babbling, and he’s aware he’s babbling, but his brain-to-mouth filter has gone rogue, and there’s no one here to stop him. “And it’s late! The crime rate in this area isn’t so bad. My friend Hanbin checks it incessantly, but you never know. Though, I’m sure you don’t have to worry about that usually. Big guy that you are—” Matthew chuckles and then cringes. Someone please stop him.
In what is a habit made in only a few hours, Matthew leads the way, Gunwook trailing close behind, hand in hand.
They walk into Matthew’s apartment—no longer holding hands, unfortunately.
Gunwook's hand had naturally dropped his once they’d reached the station, and Matthew couldn’t think up a good enough reason to pick it back up. He tried.Matthew bends down and attempts to dislodge Gia’s claws from Gunwook’s pants—decidedly not looking straight ahead where his eyes are crotch level. “He usually isn’t so friendly with strangers. He must like you.” Matthew smiles up at Gunwook, and they make eye contact.
Gunwook’s eyes widen and immediately go upward as Matthew’s go pointedly down.
Ok, looking into the eyes of the man your face is crotch level with is not any safer. Make a note.Matthew makes a beeline for his room, whispering into Gia’s ear. “Climbing hot guys is daddy’s thing. You’re too young for that, Gia.”
Tarae says he’s supportive of—what he refers to as—Matthew’s ho phase, just not in their apartment when there’s plenty of adequate love hotels around. And that if Matthew's hooking up with someone who isn’t willing to pay, then they don’t deserve him. Matthew thinks Taerae makes him sound like an escort, but he also doesn’t disagree with the sentiment, so he’s never felt the need to argue the point.
Gunwook looks at him incredulously. “Matthew, you can’t tell me anyone would have stuck around after I yelled at them, called them a homewrecker, and then started ugly crying—all in public.” Gunwook blushes. “Sorry about that, by the way.”
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Wherein:
Love is in the air!
You are cordially invited to the wedding of Sung Hanbin and Zhang Hao.
Date: February 1st, 2026
Location: Château de Planchevienne, Magny-Cours, Burgundy, France
OR: Matthew gets invited to his best friend’s wedding as the best man. He feels that this year will be another year of being single, but when he reaches the venue, he realizes that a person on Hao Hyung’s side is Park Gunwook, aka his old crush when they were in school, back now as hot as ever.
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- English
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Bookmarked by murdocked
14 Dec 2025
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“I-walk-with-you,” Gunwook says. His voice sounds pretty normal, but the warmth of his fingers where they touch Matthew’s skin doesn’t fit with that. “I haven’t seen the place yet.”
Matthew’s head is all mixed up.
Why. Why on earth would he do such a thing? They are in a real-life dream-like château with like two hundred people and umpteen directions to go in, and he wants to come with Matthew to the bathroom hallway? For what. Friendship? Murder? Emotional damage?
“Y-you don’t have to,” Matthew stammers. “I know how to pee alone.”However, inside his chest, the old story starts rewinding: Too much. Too dramatic. Too picky. Too… Matthew. If even Gunwook thinks he is impossible, then yes. Maybe being single forever is just his destiny.
“There you are,” he says, breathless, and grabs Matthew’s shoulders. “Stop hiding with my cousin! We need you. Now. The florist messed up the seating cards, and Hao is about to cry, and if he cries, I cry, and then my eyeliner will run, and then we’re doomed.”
“What are you doing?” he asks himself. “Get a grip. It’s been years. He doesn’t—”
He interrupts himself by biting his cheek.
Nope. Not going there.“Do you remember high school? He was my shadow; we could never get a word in, and when nobody else was having fun, he was making jokes. I used to think he was…”
Too much, Matthew’s brain provides.
Annoying.
Embarrassing.
“…kind of exhausting,” Gunwook ended.
The term landed on him like a slap.
Matthew’s chest went empty.“He was always… trying so hard at me. I didn’t understand. I probably made him feel dumb without even realizing it.” Now he sounds full of regret, his voice thick and heavy. “If I got it all wrong now and he finds out that I…”
The band inside reaches a loud chorus at that moment, covering up the rest of his sentence.
Matthew only hears static.
His heart, though, has already latched onto the words that count:
Exhausting.
Chaos.
Back then, he was always trying so hard around me. I didn’t get it.
He moves away from the window as if he has been scorched, his breathing becoming rapid.
Of course.
Of course, Gunwook was too much for him. Of course, his crush was obvious and pathetic. Of course, Gunwook saw him as the annoying, clingy kid who didn’t know when to shut up.
Maybe it is different now. Maybe it isn’t. Either way, Matthew’s mind has already figured out which version is safer to believe.
He turns and walks away before either of them can see him, the roaring in his ears being loud enough to drown out whatever Gunwook says next.
After repeatedly telling himself to leave, knowing that he heard his crush call him pathetic, he ends up in an empty side room—a coat storage area, half-lit and cluttered with garment bags and spare chairs.
He shuts the door behind him and presses his forehead against it, tightly closing his eyes.
You are exhausting.
Too much. Too dramatic. Too picky. Too… Matthew.
He lets out a short laugh, without any trace of humor.
“Well, congratulations,” he says to himself in a low voice. “At least you’re consistent.”He opens the door.
And almost Gunwook.
Gunwook’s hand is up as if he is going to knock. They both stop.
“Oh,” Matthew says. “Wow. That was unexpected.”“Tell him that his best man just needed a little… air.”
“In the coat closet?”
“Very exclusive air,” Matthew replies abruptly.“You don't get to decide what I think,” he says in a low voice. “You're not in my head.”
Matthew lets out an unamused laugh. “Yeah, but I just heard you talk about me like I was a walking migraine, so I have a pretty good sample size.”“I like you,” he says again, slower. “I mean now. Present tense. I mean, you are standing in front of me in a ridiculously good suit and joking that you will die alone with twelve cats.”
“That was only one joke,” Matthew responded weakly.“I’m sorry,” Gunwook says with a sincere look. “I can’t take back what I said, but I can tell you what I meant.”
“I like you,” he says. “I like the way you talk too much when you’re nervous. I like how you care so hard it scares you. I like that your standards are high. Because the thing is, if you were to ever choose me, then it would only be out of utmost sincerity of your feelings.”
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“Gunwookie,” he says louder, squeezing his waist firmly. “Are you listening to me?”
Still nothing, not even a twitch of his fuzzy ears. Matthew pushes himself up on his elbows, looking down at him properly. He’s still deep in sleep, his breathing steady and slow.
They’ve both known Gunwook’s hibernation could start any time now. He’s done well, in fact, to make it to late November. Last year’s hibernation was nearly a full six months, from October to March. Last year’s hibernation was a lot of things that Matthew would rather not remember.
But he’s not ready for it to start today. All he wants is a few more hours together before his bear side takes over.
Just the chance to say goodbye before Matthew is alone for the winter.
or
Gunwook's hibernation begins. It's lonelier than Matthew expected.
Bookmarked by murdocked
08 Dec 2025
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While his bear biology demands he hibernate for months on end, his human biology can barely survive it.
Seeing Gunwook waste away throughout the winter, seeing how frail he was upon waking up, having a hybrid specialist carer come to check on him every few weeks, was something that affected Matthew far more than he expected.
It was always hard to accept his differences as a hybrid. Growing up, he could hardly leave his home without feeling like a freak. But for the first time, he understood that being a hybrid didn’t just make fitting into society harder. It wasn’t just unfair, and complicated, and isolating, and different.
For some of them, it was dangerous. For people like Gunwook, it could be deadly.“Oh, but that could work, couldn’t it? A special tree is fitting for a bear’s birthday!”
“That’s like saying we should all go and cuddle in a hole in the ground for your birthday.”
“Hey, that’s pretty much what we do at pack hangouts, if you count their couch as a hole…”
“I’m going to tell Hao you said that about his couch.”“How can I not worry,” he says when they pull apart, faces a hair’s breadth apart, “when your life is in my hands?”
“It’s because it’s in your hands that I’m not worried,” Gunwook says, smile sweet and relaxed like he really, really means it.“Do you have instincts like that? Like, sometimes you just get the urge to dig holes?”
“Dude.”
“What? Was that a weird question?”
The thing with Maki is that he knows it’s a genuine question, not meant to treat him like an alien curiosity or simply to poke fun. Maybe it’s the fact that they can speak English together, but he feels like any topic is fair game with Maki. He’s just chill like that.
“I’ll get the urge to bite you in a minute.”
Maki puts his hands in the air. “Hey, I’m not trying to become a statistic.”
“Shut the fuck up, man.”He wonders if he was the real reason for his parents’ divorce, after years of disagreements about his care.
He wonders what God would think of him, if he can be considered one of God’s creations at all.
Then he goes back to bed and strokes Gunwook’s hair until he’s too tired to move, wishing somebody would comfort him, too.“Matthew,” Doyoung says, putting his hands on Matthew’s shoulders. “You realise that part of my visits here are to make sure you’re doing okay with the hibernation too, right?”
He’s pretty sure that’s not true. Doyoung’s speciality is hybrids with unusual traits or care needs.He wishes someone else was here to shut the door after them. He wishes Gunwook’s bear senses wouldn’t feel so threatened by scents other than his, so that all this pressure wouldn’t fall to him alone.
He feels awful for even thinking such a thing. He loves Gunwook so fucking much. Taking care of him shouldn’t be a burden.
What kind of boyfriend is he if he can’t even accept Gunwook’s base nature?He always knows spilling his soul to Hanbin means Hao will get to hear everything too, but as Hao reaches up a hand to stroke Matthew’s hair, he feels a bit like his parents are checking in on him, making Santa real again for their too-old child.