stormscrait
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Lord Snapcase is tired of torturing people who have no consideration for his feelings. Perhaps his loyal young protegee would be willing to help out...
Or: Age gap power imbalance BDSM done so so wrong.
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Vimes has to rescue Vetinari. Again.
Just an excuse for me to play with Vetinari drugged and vulnerable. Again.
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Vetinari tries to kill himself. Downey intervenes. Gayness ensues, eventually.
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your face cradled by hands that kill by stormscrait
Fandoms: Discworld - Terry Pratchett
23 Apr 2026
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On a trip to Uberwald, Vetinari and Drumknott's coach is stopped by bandits. Vetinari... deals with the situation. Drumknott.. has feelings about this.
A quick piece about getting turned on by murder.
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“I have been poisoned, Drumknott. There is no antidote and the treatment is impractical, so I am going to die and you are going to have an awful lot to work to do with my successor, so you may as well get started.”
Vetinari is poisoned. There is only one thing that will cure him...
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One blustery morning, a short note arrives on Downey's desk that says: Patrician. Sektober 13. Soon after Vetinari receives an old newspaper clipping about the death of a colleague's father that occurred forty years ago. It doesn't take long for things to go a little wahoonie shaped with a dead girl in a tree, a two hundred year old mystery, and a creature stalking the streets of Ankh-Morpork.
Of course, throughout all of this, Vetinari is fending off unsolicited advice from his aunt (buy a lint roller!) and begins to worry that he might be developing an approximation of something like maybe feelings, for a limited value of feelings, for one Master of the Assassins Guild.
Naturally, nothing is every entirely straight forward and some families have old secrets.
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Note: The title is an anagram.Series
- Part 1 of Decreation
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“Who touched you last?”
Vetinari’s voice is quiet, a shattered, tired thing. “You.” His long, pale fingers close tightly over Vimes’ own, and the mask slips as his chin dips down and a deep, shivering sigh is forced from him.
“That was when you were poisoned. That was almost a year ago.”
“Almost, yes.” Vetinari’s tone suspiciously sounds like he could recite the exact time down to the hour, if asked.
Vetinari is touch starved. Vimes touches him, and the Patrician breaks apart. Cuddles!
Bookmarked by stormscrait
05 Oct 2026
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Dealing With Workaholic Non-Corporeal Colleagues by JakeTakesaBreak
Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
16 Jun 2025
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There is a ghost loose in the Archives, and it likes to steal pens.
Martin is annoyed, Tim is having fun and Sasha investigates whether work ethic still applies to someone who is, for all intents and purposes, deceased.
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Fledging is Hard by cynicalwerewolf
Fandoms: Vorkosigan Saga - Lois McMaster Bujold, His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
19 Mar 2012
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“You certain that you know what you’re doing, Miles? This has the potential to be more unpleasant than our visit to Beta last year.”
Series
Bookmarked by stormscrait
30 Sep 2026
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Apocrypha, or, How Jonathan Sims Learned to Like Poetry by celebros
Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
14 May 2026
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“Jon thinks he knows what you’re going to get,” Tim says conspiratorially.
“Oh!” Martin says, and turns towards Jon, holding the menu between them. “Please! I’m indecisive. What did you see?”
Jon raises his eyebrows at Tim as if asking for permission, then taps at the menu. “They have an Earl Grey French ‘75,” he says. Martin squints at the description: Earl Grey infused gin, honey, lemon juice, prosecco. Color is rising in Jon’s cheeks, he thinks, although that could just be light reflecting from the sofas. “I was mostly joking -- you can get whatever you like, of course. On me.”
“Is this from our social budget?” Tim asks.
“No, this is -- on me. Truly. After the week I just put you through, it’s the least I can do.” Jon wrinkles his nose as Martin waves down a waitress. “We have a social budget?”
ADDED 5/13: More epistolary poetry (ch 10), and a timeline (ch 11).
Bookmarked by stormscrait
12 Sep 2026