Chapter Text
Prologue: དབེན་གནས (Solitude)
A tiny speck of warmth in an ocean of coldness.
As long as he could remember, there was always only this far, far away flickering orb that gave him warmth, keeping him alive. This orb was always there.
There were times, were it grew stronger and there were times, were it grew weaker. It seemed like the orb was moving in a never-ending cycle. But he never worried about this cycle. He was content with how things were.
But then suddenly… the orb and its warmth vanished!
Even if it was just for a short while, he felt terror. A terror so strong, it shook his core and made the world as he knew it crumble around him.
His only companion over the years vanished, the source that has been keeping him alive all this time, vanished for a short while. And all though he was young, it was in that moment where he knew it: He won’t be able to go on like this forever.
He could feel himself growing more tired and weaker with every cycle of the orb.
He grew more restless, trying to get closer to the warmth he felt. But he couldn’t. An unknown force kept him away. He was trapped! He struggled and clawed, but he couldn’t get closer! He was to weak to get away!
He was devastated. And scared. Each time before he fell asleep, he wondered if he would be trapped in that place forever or would he have fallen into an eternal sleep before he could get out? Was there even a chance that that place would one day vanish? Why wasn't he able to get out of this place until now? Why hadn’t anyone helped him get away from there?
He could tell there were others around him. Others that could call out to him, reach out to him. But they didn’t, they never did.
Some of them seemed to be like him. Kin of blood – he could feel it deep in his bones. Yet they never called out to him, never gave him warmth like his only companion ‘the orb’, even though they had the same warmth as the flickering orb burning within them.
There were also many other tiny flickers of the same origin around him all the time. Yet, none of them called to him or gave him their warmth.
A long time ago, he came to the conclusion, that maybe they didn’t know that he was there waiting for them.
In these moments, it was a soul crushing sadness that he felt. Sad, isolated, forgotten and alone.
A wave of dizziness came over him again.
He was so tired. He just wanted to sleep, but he also wanted to stay awake. He knew, he would fall asleep again soon, but he didn’t want to. Since he didn’t know if he would ever wake up again.
He didn’t know it then, but in that moment, he was screaming into the dark abyss around him, screaming for help. He was desperate. He wanted to live. He wanted to be unstuck. He wanted to feel warm. He wanted-
An explosion of warmth. A shock went through him.
He froze for a moment. Just what was this? This was so different from what he knew! But he it wasn't like he disliked it. It felt really nice.
He could feel his strength returning to him. The coldness around him vanished and the darkness around him as well. There he saw it for the first time, so many different new things, that he couldn’t name back then. At some point in the future, he learned the names of the different colors he saw that day.
But in the same way as the warmth came, it abruptly vanished again. And he grew even more desperate. Only one thought was on his mind then.
‘Stay! Please, stay!’