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go the f*ck to sleep!

Summary:

It was like waging a war to get peter to sleep. Luckily Meredith quill knew a trick that would work once every blue moon, and that was to read a book or sing until Peter dozed off or expelled all his energy by dancing around his room.

Unfortunately yondu and the ravagers did not know this secret.

 

anonymous prompt: "Go the Fuck to Sleep!" As read by Yondu.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-MCdcwbbp4
from the "Go the Fuck to Sleep" Book by Adam Mansbach

Notes:

prompt and fill to be found here: http://guardian-kink.livejournal.com/1806.html?thread=337934#t337934

gotg kink meme round one: http://guardian-kink.livejournal.com/1806.html?page=1#comments

enjoy :))

Work Text:

When he was a child, small and hyper, peter could never sit still. He would open his eyes in the morning, before the sun had fully risen, and that would be that. He would spring out of bed and run to his mother, climb into her bed and wake her up, asking for breakfast and what they were going to do that day or if they could go see Grandpa.
He would spend the rest of the day running wild, falling of his bike, climbing trees, dancing and singing in the kitchen with his mum as they made lunch. His days were exciting and full of imagination like most children's days are.
And by the time he had his dinner and was washed, ready for bed, you would have thought he would be exhausted. But Peter was never like that, he would bounce on his bed singing along with the radio and spring around the room like a kangaroo as his mother tried to get him into bed to sleep.
It was like waging a war to get peter to sleep. Luckily Meredith quill knew a trick that would work once every blue moon, and that was to read a book or sing until Peter dozed off or expelled all his energy by dancing around his room.

Unfortunately yondu and the ravagers did not know this secret. In fact for the first week they didn't know peter wasn't great with the whole "bed-time" thing at all.The Eight year old would cry and hide in the corner of the bunk room at night refusing to move and only getting more distressed when someone tried to make him. So it wasn't till the boy had calmed down and was somewhat use to the crew during his second or third week on board, did yondu find out about the "bed-time" problem.

At first it was just one night with peter sneaking into yondu's private room and asking for a drink (causing the pirate to not only leave his warm bed to get a drink for the brat but to have a heart attack in the mean time).
The next time it was to go to the toilet (this caused yondu to yell as the child knew where the fucking toilet was and didn't need a babysitter to lead him there and back again).
The next night yondu found out one of his crew gave the kid a Terran sweet called "smarties", this caused peter to run havoc and be hyper as all hell half the fucking night.

After two bloody weeks of getting five hours sleep or less each night, the crew and it's captain were exhausted and pissed off so when the next night a few members of the crew started yelling at the boy, Yondu (tired, pissed off and wanting sleep) whistled loud and clear making his arrow fly through the ship out of his own private room and into the sleeping quarters, stopping to hover in the doorway as a threat if the crew should continue their yelling.
They settled down pretty darn quick as you can imagine so once it was dead silent, yondu called his arrow back.
Unfortunately the arrow brought a friend.

"How do you control that arrow?"

"Holy crap!" Scrabbling to sit up, yondu glared at the child stood at the foot of his bed, big eyes and a little nose just managing to peer over the bed frame at the captain. "What on earth are you doin boy!?"

"How do you control that? Is it by whistling? Could I try? My grandpa could whistle but I can't yet, but I can learn" earnestly the boy pierced his lips and started blowing, no whistling happened though, only the biggest wettest raspberry ever made came out of the boy.
And it continued.
Groaning and running a hand down his face before rubbing the back of his neck, yondu glared at the child (who was still blowing the raspberry causing spit to fly everywhere) "Stop it boy if you know what's good for you" growled the captain. And yes while peter did stop blowing the raspberry he didn't seem frightened only more awake and interested "Go back to the bunk room and to sleep, kid before I decide to make you into a midnight snack"

"But I'm not tired"

"Then get tired cause I'm not going to deal with some Whiney brat all night again! now get! Back to your bunk" yondu spat before laying back down to get some shut eye. The minutes ticked on and sighing contently the captain of the ravagers started to drift off to sleep.

"Yondu....captain.....sir?" The voice was small and quiet "yondu? I can't sleep though, it's too quiet"

"I know for a fact half my crew snores so it can't be that damned quiet you little Terran brat" grumbled yondu not even bothering to open his eyes any more.

"But it's not the same, my mum would sing or read me a story" peter whined trying to push himself onto the bed, only managing to pull the blanket off the captain "can you read me a story?"

"No I can't go away you little ingrate"

"Pleaaaaase?" Finally managing to get onto the bed, peter shuffles over to gingerly poke yondu on the shoulder. When all he got was a groan and a half mumbled curse he poked again, then again and again and again until...

"ALL BLOODY RIGHT!" Screeched the Zatoan sitting up right and flipping around to glare at the child "lay the fuck down and close your eyes"

Peter did as he was told Shuffling his feet under the covers and blinking happily up at yondu once he was comfortable.
And this is where yondu's problems really started, he was a bloody pirate, he didn't know any stories or songs for children (or adults truth be told). Groaning as he laid down next to the boy he started with the only thing he could think of, utter bullshit from the top of his head.

"The cats nestle close to their kittens, the lambs have laid down with the sheep" looking over at the kid who still looked wide awake, yondu continued "your cozy and warm in MY bloody bed, brat, so go the fuck to sleep."

Scrunching his nose up peter glared at the pirate causing him to sigh and continue "the windows are dark in the town, child. The whales huddle down in the deep. I will keep on talking if you swear you'll go the fuck to sleep"
Giggling peter turned on his side toward yondu and shuffled down, finally closing his eyes. "The eagles who soar through the sky are at rest. And the creatures who crawl, run and creep. I know you're not thirsty. That's bullshit. Stop lying. Lie the fuck down, you brat, and sleep"

Slowly shifting himself to face the boy, yondu continued to talk "All the kids from daycare are in dreamland. The frog has made his last leap. Hell no you can't go to the bathroom. You know where you can go? The fuck to sleep" Closing his eyes, hoping to god the kid was drifting of asleep the pirate continued his voice lowering into a soothing whisper
"The tiger reclines in the Siberian jungle. The sparrow had silenced her cheap. Fuck your bloody music, I'm not getting you shit. Close your eyes, cut the crap: sleep" Chuckling to himself as the boys breathing finally evened out into sleep, yondu sighed and was just starting to doze off when he heard sniggering by the door.

Grumbling quietly he shifted himself onto his elbows as smoothly as he could trying not to wake the boy, looking at the doorway he could just make out Kraglin stood leaning against the door frame

"I always knew you were a softy, why have you never read me and the crew a bedtime story? This is favouritism, you know" snickered Kraglin

"Get the fuck out of my room before you wake the brat, get your own damned bedtime story while you're at it!!"

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