Work Text:
【1】
Wei Wuxian starts to have fainting spells.
It isn't anything serious Lan Zhan, Wei Wuxian reassures him, probably just the summer heat.
Just as he finishes, a cool breeze finds its way in through their open window, blowing the loose strands of hair onto his cheek. Summer has only just arrived in Gusu, and the chill from spring has not left the air yet.
Lan Zhan presses his lips together. Wei Wuxian laughs nervously as he flicks them away. Aiya Lan Zhan-
If it happens again I will call for a physician, Lan Zhan says, his voice firm.
Wei Wuxian does not press further. He knows that that is as much Lan Zhan is willing to budge on the issue.
Well, he will just have to get enough rest, keep himself hydrated and whatnot. He never had fainting spells back then in his own body, so it shouldn't be anything serious. Anyway, how hard could it be to prevent a faint?
【2】
The next time Wei Wuxian passes out, Lan Zhan keeps to his word and calls for a physician.
Fine, Wei Wuxian thought with a sigh, let him come then. It will at the very least reassure Lan Zhan once he hears that it isn't anything serious.
And so Wei Wuxian lies down obediently on the bed, per Lan Zhan's orders, as the physician checks his pulse.
The physician swallows heavily as he puts down Wei Wuxian's arm and turns to look at Lan Zhan.
"Hanguang-jun," he says, almost nervously, "how long has Wei-gongzi been having these fainting spells?"
"A few weeks," Lan Zhan replies.
The physician pauses for a moment. "How frequent?"
Wei Wuxian tilts his head to the side in consideration. "Not very," he says, "It only happens maybe once every month?"
"It used to be once a month during the early to middle of spring. Then it became once every one to two weeks," Lan Zhan corrects. "But it has become even more frequent recently."
Wei Wuxian laughs in embarrassment, scratching at his head. "Oh that much? I didn't even realize." He looks back at the physician. "It's just fatigue isn't it?"
The physician does not affirm him. In fact, he looks all the more distraught.
"What is it?" Wei Wuxian asks. He forces a laugh. "It can't be something serious can it?" He looks at Lan Zhan and feels a trickle of relief when he sees the warm eyes on him. "I eat all my meals and get enough sleep. I even train with Lan Zhan all the time, do you know how hard it is to keep up with him?" he jokes.
The physician does not reply. He stands up and moves to Lan Zhan away from him. "Hanguang-jun," he says lowly, eyes flickering towards Wei Wuxian. "It might be better to tell you privately…if you would allow so that is," he adds on hastily.
Lan Zhan does not hesitate when he says, "You may speak freely here."
The physician grimaces and continues. "You see… Wei-gongzi's spirit is not compatible with the body he is in."
Wei Wuxian grins up at Lan Zhan. "That's fine. As long as Lan Zhan likes it." He winks at him.
The physician lets out a strangled cough.
Lan Zhan frowns minutely. "Wei Ying," he chastises, even as his ears turn red.
Lan Zhan looks back to the physician, his face smoothing back into solemnity. "Continue," he says.
"My apologies Hanguang-jun," he says hurriedly while Wei Wuxian tries not to laugh at the side. "Because of the incompatibility, the body is deteriorating as we speak. Judging by the fainting spells," he exhales heavily, "Wei-gongzi does not have long to live."
Silence falls over the Jingshi for a long moment before it is broken up by Wei Wuxian's laughter. "That's a joke right? Tell me that's a joke."
The physician does not speak.
"How long," Lan Zhan says.
"Lan Zhan, you can't actually believe-"
"He might not last past the winter," the physician replies.
"Wait a minute," Wei Wuxian says. He laughs again, but this time it cuts harsh and loud through the air like a sword through a corpse's chest. "How do we know what you're saying is true? Maybe you got it-"
The physician has the gall to look insulted. "Wei-gongzi, my reputation as one of the best physicians in Gusu is spread wide and far. I have trained under the most famous physicians and have been a physician myself for decades. My ancestors and I have served the Gusu Lan sect exceptionally for centuries. I can swear on my life that I have certainly not made an error."
Wei Wuxian looks at Lan Zhan, only to see Lan Zhan looking back at him.
Lan Zhan looks away. "Is there a way to prevent this?" he says.
"Lan Zhan," Wei Wuxian says.
The anger melts away from the physician as he turns back to Lan Zhan and speaks deferentially once more, "If Wei-gongzi is able to possess a body that-"
"No," Wei Wuxian says firmly.
The physician shoots a glare at him but ends his words there, his mouth pinching tight. A thought comes to the physician and he frowns and continues, "but the body should not have deteriorated so quickly." He asks Lan Zhan, "Has Wei-gongzi been having headaches or dizzy spells before that?"
Lan Zhan stills. "Yes," he finally replies.
Both of them had thought it was nothing serious, thinking it was only because Mo Xuanyu's body was weak. Lan Zhan had brewed bowls of tonics for him hoping it would help to strengthen his body further but clearly it had done little to help.
Lan Zhan's face draws tight in guilt.
Wei Wuxian frowns and says, "it's not your fault Lan Zhan. Even if we knew then we couldn't have prevented this."
Lan Zhan does not reply.
Wei Wuxian sighs, he will have to talk to Lan Zhan about that later. He turns back to the physician. "Is there anything we can do to prolong my-" he stops, swallows heavily and changes his words, "to prolong it?"
"Your immunity system will get weaker as time goes on, whatever tonics or medicinal herbs will do little to help," the physician says. "I advise not leaving the house as much as possible. A common cold can become fatal."
"...Right," Wei Wuxian says faintly.
"Thank you," Lan Zhan says and moves to the door. Getting the hint, the physician follows after him. They bow to each other. "Take care Hanguang-jun," the physician says. He bows to Wei Wuxian. "Wei-gongzi," he says before leaving.
When Lan Zhan returns, Wei Wuxian is already standing up. "Lan Zhan," he says. "It's not your fault. If anything, it was me who-"
Lan Zhan pushes him back down onto the bed and wraps him up in his arms, effectively cutting him off.
"Wei Ying," he says. His warm breath tickles Wei Wuxian's ear.
Wei Wuxian wraps his arms tight around Lan Zhan too. "Lan Zhan ah," he says.
The unspoken words linger heavy in the air.
They remain like that for a long time, feeling their chests rise in time to their breaths.
At least right now, Wei Wuxian is still alive in Lan Zhan's arms.
【3】
Wei Wuxian tells Lan Zhan not to tell anyone about it, not even the juniors. Not even Sizhui, he says,before looking away, at least for now.
He knows he won't be able to hide it from them for long, but when he can't even accept it himself, how was he to tell others?
"Whenever you wish to," Lan Zhan reassures him.
Wei Wuxian presses his face into Lan Zhan's chest. "Hey Lan Zhan," he says, "what if they're lying? Or maybe they just got it wrong?"
Lan Zhan had called other physicians to Cloud Recesses after the first one had left. All of them had said the same thing. Incompatible body and spirit. Deteriorating body. Won't last the winter.
Lan Zhan does not reply, only wraps his arms tighter around him.
Both of them know what Wei Wuxian is saying is only wishful thinking.
【4】
Wei Wuxian refuses to stop night hunting with the juniors. If anything happens you will be there to save me anyways, Wei Wuxian says. Besides, he continues cheekily, the juniors will miss me.
Lan Zhan lets out a heavy exhale. If anything happens we will stop night hunting, he draws the line at that.
Wei Wuxian agrees. After all, what are the chances he would faint during one?
The first few night hunts go without any mishaps, much to Wei Wuxian's relief. And even if Lan Zhan hovers over him more than he used to, the juniors do not suspect anything is amiss.
Tonight, they are fighting a bunch of low level corpses. Nothing too difficult or taxing. Wei Wuxian fights beside Lan Zhan, playing Chenqing to direct the corpses to them to be killed.
All he has to do is avoid the corpses that sometimes find a rare opening to take a swipe at him. Easy peasy.
Only problem is, he has been pushing through a migraine since the day began. He finds himself panting for breath the longer he plays on Chenqing, his vision turning blurry and movements sluggish. Black dots start to crowd at the corners of his vision.
"Lan Zhan," he calls out weakly. Before he can even get an answer from him, he sways forward, Chenqing dropping from his hands and everything goes black.
【5】
When he wakes up, he is already back in the Jingshi.
He sighs and musters his strength to sit up.
Seeing Wei Wuxian has woken up, Lan Zhan rushes to the side of his bed with a cup of warm water.
Wei Wuxian gulps it down gratefully. When he is done, he passes the cup back to him and looks at his arms and legs, pats at his body. He smiles up at Lan Zhan, "I knew Lan Zhan would keep me safe."
Lan Zhan does not even look slightly gratified by his compliment. He nods. "I was able to catch hold of you before the corpses did," he says quietly. "Luckily," he adds.
Wei Wuxian looks away. "I guess this means no more night hunting?"
Lan Zhan nods once more.
Wei Wuxian does not look back at him.
"This is for your own safety," Lan Zhan reminds him.
"I know." Wei Wuxian exhales, "I know." A thought comes to him. "But you're still going to go on night hunts with the juniors right?" he confirms.
Lan Zhan shakes his head. "I do not want to be on a night hunt without Wei Ying."
Wei Wuxian thought as much. "Lan Zhan," he frowns, "you don't have to worry about-"
"I want to spend all my time with Wei Ying," Lan Zhan says firmly, his eyes steady on him.
Wei Wuxian's breath leaves him in a rush. Right, foolish of him. Of course. He has realized that sometimes in his consideration for Lan Zhan, he hurts him unintentionally. He thought he has gotten better at that. Apparently not.
Wei Wuxian rubs his thumb along Lan Zhan's palm in apology. "I want to spend all my time with Lan Zhan too," he says.
It soothes him a little when he sees Lan Zhan smile at his words.
【6】
The juniors arrive at the Jingshi to visit Wei Wuxian.
Wei Wuxian is woken up from his afternoon nap by their voices. He listens as Lan Zhan tells them at the door that Wei Wuxian is asleep and not to disturb him.
Wei Wuxian gets up carefully and walks towards them. The dizzy spells have worsened over time, and if he sits up too quickly he runs the risk of fainting again.
He goes up next to Lan Zhan. "What's with the racket outside," he chastises them teasingly.
"Wei-qianbei!" they say in chorus, their worry bleeding away into the relief. Jin Ling and Ouyang Zizhen are there together with Sizhui and Jingyi. His chest warms at the sight. They have come over to Cloud Recesses for him.
"Wei Ying," Lan Zhan says, a question in his words.
Wei Wuxian smiles up at him assuredly. He slides the door open to the juniors. "Come on in," he says and ushers them in, wincing at the bright glare of the afternoon sun. "It must be hot outside."
They sit down politely. Only Sizhui and Jingyi have ever been in the Jingshi, and the other two move stiffly to sit at the low table with the two Lan disciples with their backs ramrod straight. Wei Wuxian feels the irrational urge to laugh even in a situation like this.
Lan Zhan trails in behind them and sits beside Wei Wuxian, holding his hand under the table in support.
"What's the occasion today?" Wei Wuxian asks jokingly.
"Wei-qianbei," Sizhui asks worriedly. "How are you faring?"
"Yeah," Jin Ling adds on, "that day during the night hunt you just-"
Wei Wuxian waves a hand. "I'm fine I'm fine," he says, gesturing at himself. "See? I guess I must have been too tired that day."
He is relieved when the juniors seem to have accepted his words and when they finally leave the Jingshi, they are nothing but reassured of Wei Wuxian's well being.
When Lan Zhan shuts the door, Wei Wuxian hugs him tight from behind.
He wants to say thank you, thank you for telling them to leave even though it hurts you because I'm still not ready to tell them. He wants to say I'm sorry, I'm sorry for making you lie by omission, I'm sorry that I'm leaving you again.
But as Lan Zhan had said, there is no need for 'thank you' and 'sorry' between us, and so Wei Wuxian says nothing.
He knows Lan Zhan can hear his unspoken words.
Lan Zhan had not wanted him to say those words because every time Wei Wuxian did, the distance between them had grown wider.
But then again, Wei Wuxian thinks, what distance could be further apart than the distance between life and death?
【7】
It is the mid-autumn festival.
Wei Wuxian walks hand in hand with Lan Zhan, a lantern painted with rabbits in his hand.
The moon is bright and full, and lanterns can be seen all over Cloud Recesses as the disciples celebrate the festival together.
Both of them move to sit under a stone pavilion, watching the juniors light more lanterns in the distance and leaving mooncakes to Chang'e on the altar.
Lan Zhan brings out tea and a plate of mooncakes. Wei Wuxian's eyes twinkle as they roam over the different flavors of mooncakes to see which he should try first.
Wei Wuxian takes a bite out of the one with the most intricate design. It's sweet. He hums in enjoyment and cups his cheeks in his hands as he watches Lan Zhan under the moonlight. In his white robes, pouring tea into his cup expertly and gracefully under the moonlight, he looks ethereal, like a fairy who has descended upon the mortal world.
He thinks of the tale of Chang'e the moon goddess, who had to live on the moon away from her husband forever. Maybe it would be less painful to think of what will happen that way, that Wei Wuxian would always be watching Lan Zhan from a distance even when he is gone from his side.
"Lan Zhan ah," Wei Wuxian says, "Shall I be your Chang'e? I'll float to the moon and watch you from above all the time." He pretends not to see how Lan Zhan's hand jerks and tea spills onto the table. "Which makes you Hou Yi! Pretty apt don't you think? You were always good at archery."
Lan Zhan looks up at him with eyes drawn tight in pain. Lan Zhan had always been able to hear what Wei Wuxian actually meant under all his words. "Will Wei Ying wait for me to join you on the moon?"
It takes a long moment before Wei Wuxian can even speak again. "Of course," he chokes out. "I'll wait for Lan Zhan as long as it takes him to do so."
【8】
They are walking through Caiyi Town. It is near enough to Cloud Recesses that it does not pose much of a risk. And with Lan Zhan by his side, he feels nothing but safe.
Wei Wuxian is used to the stares directed at Lan Zhan, and he feels a little smug when their eyes land to their hands held together and their faces fall a little. Too bad, he thinks, this handsome man has already been taken. In a good mood, Wei Wuxian hums a tune under his breath as he skips ahead as far as their arms can stretch.
"Be careful," Lan Zhan says as he tightens his grip on him. Wei Wuxian only smiles cheekily back at him but stops skipping to walk beside him.
The ground is wet from yet another sudden Gusu rainfall earlier on. The rain had gotten rid of the remnants of the summer heat and the air is cool on their skins. The osmanthuses have already begun to bloom, yellow and striking as they brighten up the dull streets.
It is going to be autumn soon.
The river running along the street beside them floats with lotus flowers, dotting pink against the green of the water. It reminds him of Yunmeng, and oh, the realization hits him painfully, he has not been back to Lotus Pier since that day years ago and he guesses he will never do so now.
Although both of them had spent time walking leisurely through the different towns they have been to on night hunts, most of it had been spent on the night hunts themselves, fighting the bloodthirsty yaos and guis side by side.
This is a total change of pace. It is slow, relaxing. His mouth is still sweet with the osmanthus cake that Lan Zhan had bought for him earlier. He likes this, this leisure walks with Lan Zhan. No, he corrects himself, he likes any moment he spends with Lan Zhan. They have suffered so hard and long to get to where they are now, and yet there will be none of this happiness once he-
Tears well in his eyes and he squeezes Lan Zhan's hand tight.
"Wei Ying?" Lan Zhan asks, his brows knitting together in worry. The osmanthuses are brilliant in their yellow behind him, and it reminds Wei Wuxian that today is a happy day, another day alive, another day with Lan Zhan to treasure and hold in his palms like the purest pearl.
Wei Wuxian shakes his head and musters a smile. He blinks the tears away, and they fall on his eyelashes like little rain droplets. "The osmanthuses are beautiful," he says in reply.
Lan Zhan kisses his tears away. "Wei Ying even more so," he says.
【9】
The next time they are tasked to accompany the juniors on their night hunts, Lan Zhan declines and pays a visit to his brother and uncle to request that he and Wei Wuxian retire from being mentors to the juniors.
They become the first people to know of Wei Wuxian's illness.
Lan Zhan veils it as a request, but all four of them know that even if he does not receive permission to do so, he would have done as he wished all the same. Wei Wuxian is pretty sure Lan Qiren must be feeling pretty relieved inside that Wei Wuxian would finally be gone and stop being a corrupting influence on his exemplar nephew and disciples.
Which is probably why he agreed to Lan Zhan's request, knowing that Wei Wuxian would be gone by the end of winter. Wei Wuxian doesn't know how to feel about that, but he does appreciate that it didn't result in another conflict between Lan Zhan and Lan Qiren over him.
Sizhui drops by the Jingshi when he hears of the news, carrying the curiosity and concerns of Lan Jingyi and the other disciples with him.
Wei Wuxian and Lan Zhan had expected his visit and prepared themselves for it. Wei Wuxian tells Sizhui of the truth while Lan Zhan sits silently at his side. He ends it off by telling Sizhui to keep it a secret and that he is the only person they will tell.
Sizhui is quiet the entire time as Wei Wuxian speaks, but when he hears that, he speaks up for the first time. "Wei-qianbei," he cuts Wei Wuxian off, "I think you do not know how much the juniors care for you. It would not be fair to hide it from them, and I would be lying if I said I would keep it a secret from them for neither would I do so, nor would I be able to even if I tried."
Tears begin to fall from his eyes onto the wood table in front of them. "Wei-qianbei…" he says. He looks at Lan Zhan, "Hanguang-jun…" as if hoping to hear a solution from them. When both of them say nothing in return, his tears only fall more profusely as he begins to sob.
Wei Wuxian is once again reminded that he is just a boy. It was selfish to tell him, to put this on his shoulders. But it would also be selfish not to.
Wei Wuxian feels his eyes sting, his tears threatening to fall. He looks to Lan Zhan.
The rims of Lan Zhan's eyes are red as he nods.
Wei Wuxian turns back to Sizhui. "Ah Yuan ah," he says.
Sizhui looks up at him, tears continuing to streak down his cheeks.
"You're right," Wei Wuxian says. He musters a smile. "Tell them to come then."
【10】
Jin Ling, Jingyi, Zizhen and Wen Ning arrive with Lan Sizhui. They are nervous of what Wei Wuxian is to tell them after seeing how downcast Sizhui is ever since he called them over to the Jingshi together.
Wei Wuxian tells them the same thing he tells Sizhui.
All of them cry by the end of it. Except Wen Ning, although he would be crying if he could tear up.
Wei Wuxian looks at all of them sitting in a row in front of the low table. "Aiya," he says, forcing some cheerfulness into his voice. "Don't cry. This won't be anytime soon so-"
"Shut up," Jin Ling says. And for once, Wei Wuxian is struck aback by how similar he is to Jiang Cheng. A pang of longing pierces him through the chest even though he knows he will never get to see him again. "Shut up," Jin Ling says again as he rubs roughly at his tears.
Wei Wuxian does as he is told for once. He looks at everyone in the Jingshi, looks at Lan Zhan, and he thinks, these are people who care for me, who will be sad that I'll be gone from their lives. He never thought he could ever have this after what he had done in his previous life, never dreamed of it.
Somehow at that moment, even as tears gather in his eyes, he is happy.
【11】
When they leave, Lan Zhan scoops him up and places him on the bed.
"Lan Zhan what-"
Lan Zhan takes off Wei Wuxian's robes and spreads his legs. He bends his head down and sucks at his cock.
Wei Wuxian jerks his hips upwards involuntarily. "Lan Zhan," he says. "You don't have to-" his words are cut off by his own moan as Lan Zhan swirls his tongue around the head of his cock.
He tries to close his legs instead but Lan Zhan holds them firmly in place.
His nimble fingers play with his balls, while his tongue begins to lick a stripe up the length of his cock.
Wei Wuxian's entire body trembles and he falls limply against the bed.
Lan Zhan continues his ministrations, taking Wei Wuxian's cock all the way down his throat. Another cry escapes Wei Wuxian's lips, his entire body shaking while his hands clutch at the bedsheets.
The head of his cock continues to hit the back of Lan Zhan's throat time and again, and heat pools unbearably in Wei Wuxian's belly.
"Lan Zhan," he gasps out, "I'm going to-"
He arches his back in pleasure and comes on Lan Zhan's face.
Wei Wuxian's pants heavily, eyes glazed as he watches Lan Zhan licks at the come on his lips and spreads Wei Wuxian's legs wider.
He wipes the come off his face onto his fingers and twists them inside of Wei Wuxian. Wei Wuxian shivers, feels his hole clench tight around them as they curl into his prostate.
They scissor him open and Wei Wuxian makes a strangled noise. His hole clenches around Lan Zhan's fingers as he does so until he finally removes them from inside him.
Lan Zhan strokes his own cock and pushes into him.
Wei Wuxian shudders in Lan Zhan's grasp, eyes fluttering shut in pleasure as his hole widens to accommodate him.
Where Lan Zhan had always been rough in bed, pounding him down to the hilt with his grip tight on Wei Wuxian until it left bruises, it is nothing like that now.
Lan Zhan places Wei Wuxian's legs onto his shoulders, his cock hitting against his prostate without fail with each gentle thrust while his hand stroke along the length of Wei Wuxian's cock. It is clear that Lan Zhan is only concerned with Wei Wuxian's own pleasure and not his own in an attempt to make him feel better about telling everyone earlier.
Lan Zhan has always put him first, stood behind him each time, and he thinks, who is going to care for him as much as Lan Zhan does? He doesn't deserve this and yet Lan Zhan gives his love to him so freely-
Wei Wuxian comes, not from the pleasure, but from the tenderness of it all.
Lan Zhan extracts himself even if he has not come yet, plants kisses all over Wei Wuxian's face until he recovers from his orgasm.
Wei Wuxian sits up and stumbles into his chest."Let me-" he begins, positioning himself over Lan Zhan's cock.
"No," Lan Zhan says, holding him away. "I will do it myself."
Wei Wuxian frowns in disagreement and wraps his hand around his erect cock, and is gratified to hear his sharp inhale.
He rubs it and grins up at Lan Zhan, "how about this?"
Lan Zhan's gaze softens and he nods. Wei Wuxian grins and surges up to him for a kiss.
Their tongues roll over each other and Wei Wuxian goes lower to suck at his lower lip while he runs both hands up and down Lan Zhan's cock.
Lan Zhan grunts, his hips jerking up into them. He wraps his arms tight around Wei Wuxian to bring him closer.
Wei Wuxian makes a pleased hum, tilting his head up as Lan Zhan kisses down the trail of his neck.
He feels Lan Zhan tense and quickly thumbs his nail into the slit. Lan Zhan jolts forward with a groan, cum splattering its way onto Wei Wuxian's cheek.
Breathing heavily, Lan Zhan cups Wei Wuxian's cheeks in his hands and wipes it away with his thumbs. Their eyes never once leave each other.
Lan Zhan leans forward and kisses Wei Wuxian deeply on the lips. Sweetly, gently, like Wei Wuxian is a sacred treasure in his hands.
Wei Wuxian feels wetness drip on his cheeks. He looks up to see Lan Zhan crying.
"Lan Zhan," Wei Wuxian says in surprise as he wipes the tears away frantically. "What's wrong?"
Lan Zhan says nothing.
Wei Wuxian sighs. "Aiya," he says. He tries to smile even if his heart aches at the sight. "If you think about it, I've been living on borrowed time all this while. This life is a second chance I didn't even deserve so-"
"Wei Ying deserves this." Lan Zhan cuts him off. "Wei Ying deserves this and better."
Lan Zhan's eyes on him are nothing but sincere.
Wei Wuxian feels the dam he has built inside of him crumble into pieces. The tears Wei Wuxian has held back for so long finally fall. This is the first time he has ever let himself cry, he realizes.
He can't stop crying now. That's why he never wanted to start in the beginning, because once he does he won't be able to stop.
As Lan Zhan kisses them away, he thinks, so much for trying to be the strong one.
【12】
It is in the middle of autumn where the maple leaves have turned a bright crimson when Jiang Cheng arrives at Cloud Recesses, just like when Wei Wuxian had left Guanyin Temple and separated himself from Jiang Cheng for good.
That had been years ago.
Wei Wuxian would be lying if he said he expected Jiang Cheng's visit. He had expected that Jin Ling would have told him about it but he assumed Jiang Cheng would have thought he would be better off dead.
Lan Zhan bars the door, not allowing Jiang Cheng to enter.
"Hanguang-jun," Wei Wuxian hears. "What do you think you are doing?"
"Sect Leader Jiang," Lan Zhan says firmly. "Please leave."
"You don't have the right to tell me if I get to see Wei Wuxian or not," Jiang Cheng raises his voice. "So if you know what's good for you, you better-"
Wei Wuxian forces himself up and steps between the both of them before things can escalate. "Lan Zhan," he says, placing his hand on his tensed shoulder and squeezes it gently. "Let him in."
Jiang Cheng is looking at him with wide eyes.
He must have been surprised. Wei Wuxian has gotten thinner over the past few weeks, the color in his cheeks almost all but gone.
"Wei Wuxian," he begins. "You-"
"Let's talk inside," he says to Jiang Cheng. He looks to Lan Zhan. "Could you wait outside?"
Lan Zhan looks at him, disagreement written clearly across his face.
If it had been any other time, Wei Wuxian would certainly want Lan Zhan beside him. But he sees the grief in the tightening of Jiang Cheng's eyes, how his hands shake on his grip of his sword, and he knows he can at least, give Jiang Cheng this.
"Lan Zhan," Wei Wuxian says. It leaves no room for exceptions.
Lan Zhan exhales heavily and leaves.
【13】
Lan Wangji watches from afar, sees from the window of the Jingshi where Jiang Wanyin is crying into Wei Ying's chest while Wei Ying comforts him with a hand on his back.
Lan Xichen had hurried to the Jingshi after hearing about Sect Leader Jiang’s unprecedented visit only to see Lan Wangji standing outside.
Lan Xichen looks a lot better now than he did when he first went into seclusion. He has been taking short trips around Cloud Recesses recently, and it will only be time before he would take up active duty as sect leader once more.
Now, he stands beside Lan Wangji. Both of them have their hands behind their back. If anyone walks past the Jingshi now, they would not have been able to differentiate between the both of them. They stand motionless and still like identical statues among the piles of maple leaves that have fallen to the ground.
It is as if a scene from a painting. The rich red of the leaves contrasts with the pure white of their robes, making them look even more celestial than they already do. The wind blows, scattering the leaves into the air and billowing their robes towards the sky.
"What are you going to do once Wei-gongzi is gone?" Lan Xichen asks, fear laced in his voice. He does not think Lan Wangji can handle losing Wei Ying a second time. Lan Wangji does not think he can either.
Lan Wangji's hands clench tight behind his back. "I do not know," he answers truthfully.
【14】
The plum blossoms are in full bloom during the winter. It rarely snows in Gusu, so the flowers are in their full glory without a coating of snow bearing down on them.
Wei Wuxian leans against the window with his chin propped up in his hands as he admires them.
Lan Zhan has forbidden him from leaving the Jingshi. All their meals are ordered to be brought to them by the disciples. He also makes them bring an extensive amount of scrolls and books for Wei Wuxian to read in case he gets bored.
Music scores have also been delivered to them. Sometimes, if one walks past the Jingshi, a lovely melody harmonized between qin and di can be heard wafting from it.
Sizhui and Jingyi drop by sometimes too, Jin Ling and Zizhen occasionally when they are able to, entertaining Wei Wuxian with stories from the night hunts that he and Lan Zhan have been missing out on. With Lan Zhan being unwilling to leave Wei Wuxian alone at any moment, Sizhui has no choice but to visit the Jingshi to practice his qin with him while Wei Wuxian sits at the side to admire their music whenever he is not asleep. Sometimes when he has more energy, he joins in with the both of them on Chenqing.
Other times, Sizhui comes over for no apparent reason at all. The three of them sit together with steaming cups of tea in hand as they talk, all of them trying to make the best of the time left even if none of them knows how long they can have it for. None of them speaks of what is to come, even if it lingers heavily in the air between them still.
Lan Zhan has Wei Wuxian donned in a thick coat all the time. But even through it, Wei Wuxian can feel the cold right to his bones.
Although it does not snow often in Gusu, the northern winds are strong. Rain replaces the snow and falls frequently. And with Cloud Recesses situated on a mountain, the temperature is even lower. It seems as if it is only time before Wei Wuxian would fall ill, that it is futile to even try to defend against it.
But right now, with Lan Zhan sitting beside him, their bodies flushed together in warmth, all the cold has seemed to leave his body.
Wei Wuxian plays with Lan Zhan's fingers. "Lan Zhan ah," he says, "Do you want to make a bet with me?" He looks determinedly at him." I'm going to last past winter. I'll prove it to you."
Lan Zhan frowns when he feels the coldness in his fingers. He wraps them in his palms to warm them. "I do not need to bet." He brings Wei Wuxian's hands to his lips and blows hot breaths onto them. "I believe in Wei Ying."
Lan Zhan looks to the red plum blossoms outside. Everything else has withered, dull and gray, which make them stand out more brilliantly. "Wei Ying is like the plum blossoms that blossom in the cold of winter." His amber eyes land on him and Wei Wuxian's breath seizes. "Wei Ying is strong and has never been deterred by any hardship."
Wei Wuxian looks to the white plum blossoms and back at Lan Zhan. Pure, loyal, strong. "So are you," he whispers.
【15】
Wei Wuxian catches a cold near the end of winter. He lays in bed for more than a week. No medicinal herbs or tonics he takes seem to make a difference.
Spring arrives.
Wei Wuxian opens his eyes blearily to the sound of swallows chirping in the distance.
He has lasted past the winter.
He feels a surge of triumph. The physicians are wrong. And if they are wrong about that, doesn't it mean that they are wrong about everything? He would get better soon enough. He will continue to live with Lan Zhan until the hair on their heads turns white.
Hope blossoms in his chest like the flower buds beginning to grow on the trees outside their window.
But he does not get better. His cold only gets worse.
"Lan Zhan ah," he croaks out, hands fumbling on the covers of the blanket.
Lan Zhan squeezes his hands tight. "I am here."
"Lan Zhan ah," he says again, eyes glazed over in sickness and half-lidded. He squeezes Lan Zhan's hands back but it is weak. "I don't want to go."
Lan Zhan stills. "Wei Ying," he finally says, his voice pained. "Do not linger in the mortal world once you do. There are many creatures and beings that feast on human spirits, if your spirit is hurt you will not be able to reincarnate again."
"I won't," Wei Wuxian promises him. He looks directly at Lan Zhan. "But you have to live when I'm gone," he says.
Lan Zhan's breath seizes, his hands tightening around Wei Wuxian.
"I'll wait for you in the underworld," Wei Wuxian continues. "I'll hide under the Bridge of Forgetfulness away from Mengpo. I'll wait for you until you come, no matter how many years it will be. And then we will drink Mengpo's soup together, go across the bridge together, be reborn together."
Wei Wuxian is crying by then. "Hopefully in my next life, I would be able to meet you earlier. I will be able to realize your feelings for me and fall in love with you earlier."
"I won't make you suffer for me again." Wei Wuxian's fingers dance across the scars on Lan Zhan's back. "I won't hurt you again."
Lan Zhan's chest rises and falls with all the emotions pent up inside of him. "I won't let you fall again," Lan Zhan says, bringing Wei Wuxian closer to his chest. "I'll protect you each and every time without fail in our next lives."
"Lan Zhan ah," Wei Wuxian buries his face in the crook of his neck. He puts everything he feels for him into these two words. "Lan Zhan."
"Wei Ying," Lan Zhan says back.
【16】
Wei Wuxian passes away in Lan Wangji's arms.
The plum flowers continue to blossom, strong and unwavering.
It feels like a mockery.
【17】
Wei Wuxian is buried in Cloud Recesses.
As Lan Xichen comes out of seclusion, Lan Wangji returns into one.
The cultivators shake their heads. The curse of the Lan line.
【18】
Three years later, Lan Wangji comes out of mourning and ends his seclusion. He is never in anything but his white mourning robes as he roams across the lands, helping whoever who needs his aid.
The same he had done those thirteen years after Wei Wuxian had died.
【19】
Many years later, when the story of the Yiling Patriarch and Hanguang-jun is only a legendary tale passed down to the masses, two souls destined for each other are reborn into the mortal world.
The plum blossoms bloom once more.