Work Text:
He gave me my name, Finn. For so much of my life I had just been a number, one of the thousands that served as the armies of the First Order. I was only a figure in a ledger shuffled from one place to another at my superiors whims.
The massacre on the planet where he was captured, Jakku, it freed me from the last of their brainwashing. For the first time since I had been taken from my parents I was alone in my own skin. I looked around at my "brothers in arms" after Ren gave the order to kill the villagers and I just couldn't do it. I decided I didn't have to follow their rules anymore or their owners. Their brainwashing had failed my first mission with the FN Corps would be my last, I refused to kill others for their empire.
I disobeyed the Commander's orders and instead of reporting to her division for what amounts to reprogramming I decided to walk the echoing halls of the destroyer. I knew I needed to get away from the First Order before someone came looking for me. I wasn't sure how to accomplish my goal though, for so long all I had known was these terribly cold metal walls that most of the fleet is comprised of.
I can still hear the screams in my nightmares, most times it wasn't uncommon to hear the screams of captured resistance fighters or their supporters echoing all around. It happened especially when Ren was aboard ship, but he usually only came aboard when they were ordered on a mission. It was he who ordered our journey to Jakku. The screams of this rebel though tore at me, at my very soul, calling to me for help. I didn't know his name but I couldn't get his screams out my head.
I had already made up my mind that I would stay no longer in slavery, but that I would escape. Freeing him was the only thing I could think of to do. I needed his help to get off the ship, I wasn't a trained pilot and I refused to leave him to their mercy.
I heard all the excitement about him being captured on the way back up from the surface. Everyone called him the Resistances' best pilot and after seeing him in action I agree that he was. He's one of the best pilots I have ever seen, I have never seen anyone who could fly like he could. We were so close to getting away, but we didn't make it, the fighter started to fall, uncontrolled into the atmosphere of the planet. This place that has changed my whole existence may just have been the end of it to.
I dont remember the crash; just that I woke up to heat, sand, and blindingly bright sunlight. How I ended up so far from where the fighter crashed I have no memory of. I wasn't injured that I could tell so I ran for the wreck as fast as I could manage in the sand hoping to find him, wanting to make sure he was okay.
I found nothing but his jacket in the wreck. There were no other signs remaining of the pilot I had rescued from the Order. My soul wept when I realized that I had gotten him killed, he may have been saved some other way and survived to rejoin his cause if i hadn't interfered.
The brown leather was caught in the broken remains of the front of the fighter. I don't know what possessed me to put it on but as I made my way to civilization I decided that I would always keep it with me. I would wear it and always remember the man who helped me escape.
The next few days became a blur, I walked through the wastelands of the desert planet for a long time before I reached Niima Outpost. I knew I had to run, to get as far away as I could from anything having to do with the First Order. I would never go back, I would rather die than return to the life I had lived until then.
I found the little droid that the pilot had been protecting, the one he had risked everything to come back to Jakku for. The girl and the droid ran with me, they unfortunately didn't have much choice, we left the planet behind trying to get away from the First Order.
The ship we stole was old and battle worn but a sturdy ship none the less. When we were boarded I expected it to be First Order coming to get me but it wasn't. No we were picked up and joined by members of the original Rebel Alliance, those that fought the Galactic Empire. Han and Chewbacca decided that we would head for Takodana. It wasn't long after we arrived that Rey was taken and I realized that I couldn't afford to run any longer.
Then they arrived, the Resistance, they saved us from the legion that the Order had sent to capture us. We were safe but Rey was not, she was taken by Ren. I went with the Resistance to convince them to help me save her. I had already led one person to their death I would not let another person be killed because of my actions or rather inaction.
Stepping off the Millennium Falcon when we landed at thei base on D'Qar was almost shocking, the amount of people working with the Resistance is far more than I had ever realized. I followed the little droid as it took off across the landing area, after everything that had happened I didn't want him to get lost or damaged.
I watched from a distance as BB-8 stopped beside a fighter that had just landed and was powering down its engines. The pilot jumped out and seconds later was kneeling down to speak to the hyper little droid. The droid must have said something about me. The dark haired man whipped his head up to look in my direction, and for a moment I couldn't breathe.
He was alive...Poe had survived...he had made it back to the Resistance. He called my name, the one he gave me, and I knew I didn't have to run any longer. My feet were moving before I knew it and seconds later my arms were wrapped tightly around him. My soul soard and I finally found hope that no matter what happened we would win.