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Leonard ground his teeth together. ”I wouldn't have had to disturb your precious pet project if I had been able to find my goddamn PADD in the mess you left.”
In front of him, Pasha very valiantly fought the urge to roll his eyes. ”Oh please, like you are so neat and orderly, Doctor. And it is not my fault you slept poorly – I didn't ask you to wait up for me.”
”I was worried!” Leonard snapped and there was a soft sound of distress that had the two of them turn their heads.
”Honored Federation guests,” their host began meekly, looking stricken. ”You are invited to apologize for your own transgressions, not to accuse each other of wrongdoing.” There was a brief note of panic in his voice as though it was suddenly dawning on him that humans might not be as civilized as his people had thought.
Leonard inwardly cursed and forced himself to think about Jim, about the mission, about how fucking annoying Pasha could be when he wouldn't admit to being in the wrong...
”Well, I apologize for caring about the state of our quarters and about you, when it's clear you don't appreciate it,” he continued.
Pasha breathed in sharply and squeezed his eyes shut. ”I had laid the parts out in a precise and logical pattern. A pattern that you thoroughly destroyed, thereby making my work useless.” He opened his eyes only to glare at Leonard. ”Then, to further compound my distress, you retroactively ruined my night out with your complaining when I returned.”
”Retroactively? I retroactively ruined your night? Oh, give me a break!”
”The what?” Jim had barely raised an eyebrow. Five years of strange alien rituals had made him – had made all of them – a little jaded. As long as there wouldn't be any violence or weird sex stuff involved, he was game for making his officers do almost anything.
”The Feast of Spousal Atonement,” Ilkum Kah had said and bowed her head in deference. ”Where spouses apologize for the wrongdoings they have committed over the previous year and vow to do better in the coming year. It is a sacred opportunity to better ourselves as-”
”Take them,” Jim said and waved dismissively in Leonard and Pasha's direction. ”It shouldn't take any time at all with these lovebirds.”
”Did it ever occur to you that going alone and unarmed to a civilian club on one of the most notorious space stations in the Quadrant might not have been such a bright idea?”
Leonard had felt a bit guilty over his attempts to talk his husband out of going. He knew that five months without disembarking had been rough on Pasha, that he'd needed to blow off some steam.
Still, Leonard had slept anxiously with the ring signal on his comm set to the loudest volume. Pasha had stumbled in at five am, drunk as hell, and Leonard had been so relieved to see him that he had almost held back on his lecture. But then Pasha had discovered that his engine parts had been moved around and promptly decided to spend the rest of the night on the couch.
”You could have come with me, but you didn't want to!” Pasha yelled and threw his arms out in frustration. ”Just because you want to spend shore leave locked away in solitude doesn't mean I should have to!”
With a panicked motion, the attendant reached for the small bell and started ringing it. ”Honored guests,” he began, sounding close to tears. ”We will not reach Atonement here, and your negative energy is disturbing the other participants.” He rose from the pillow he'd been sitting on and waved his arm forcefully. ”You must leave immediately!”
Pasha looked stunned and Leonard probably had a similar expression on his face as they followed their host through the long corridor. They passed countless doors on their way out and hushed voices were heard through the thin walls. Behind each door was a repentant couple, Leonard thought, apologizing for the mistakes they had made. It wasn't lost on him that he and Pasha hadn't even made it ten minutes without arguing.
When they finally emerged on the open square, their host waved to get the attention of Ilkum Kah who was talking to Jim a few feet away. ”Yours is the worst case of discord I have ever seen. I recommend that you dissolve your union immediately,” he said sharply and hurried off.
With a look of surprise, Jim threw his arms out in a gesture that obviously meant What the hell did you guys do? and jogged over to the two aliens who were now speaking in hushed tones.
”Where did you find your PADD?” Pasha asked quietly after a while.
”On top of my dresser,” Leonard admitted. Where he had left it. ”Will it take you a long time to sort the engine parts again?”
Pasha shook his head. ”Only a few minutes. It is not difficult at all.” He turned his body a little so that he was almost, but not quite, facing Leonard. ”I have been treating our quarters as though I am the only person living there. It's a bad habit of mine, I know that.”
Since Leonard's quarters had been the biggest, it had made sense for them to live there, and Leonard had told Pasha to make himself at home. That's just what Pasha had done, too.
”You're a much better combatant than I am,” Leonard continued. ”I know you can take care of yourself, and you shouldn't have to put up with me worrying about you. I'm sorry I ruined your night out.”
”I had a fantastic time. You could not have ruined it if you tried,” Pasha said with a sigh and moved in close enough to wrap his arm around Leonard's waist.
Jim was arguing frantically with the aliens now and though Leonard felt guilty, he was happy he wasn't in Jim's position. He tugged on Pasha's shoulder.
”I want to spend more time with you. We hardly get to see each other during the day, and I miss you. That's part of why I didn't want you to go out.”
”I miss you too, Leo. In thirteen days, we both have a day off,” Pasha said resolutely. ”We will plan something to do then.”
”It's a deal,” Leonard said, just as Jim turned and started walking towards them. ”All right, time to face the music.”
”You handled that well, huh?” Jim said with a grin as he came up to them. ”Don't worry, I smoothed things over. Looks like you two have, as well.” He winked.
Pasha coughed and immediately took half a step away, always wanting to conduct himself properly while on duty.
Leonard was well past the point of being embarrassed by public displays of affection, and he was relieved that they hadn't made an unsalvageable diplomatic faux-pax. ”Jim, what the hell did you say?”
”Oh, I told them the two of you had strengthened your union with a sacred Earth ritual,” Jim replied, sounding amused. ”A fight.”