Chapter Text
Episode 1
Zeitgeist
“I’m home,” A tired voice rang from the entrance. Shinji Ikari could hear the snap of the door lock and the clatter of shoes being tossed to the floor. The soft squeaking of socks made its way towards him.
“Welcome back!” Shinji called over his shoulder. He was in the kitchen giving the bubbling pot of beef stew in front of him a gentle stir.
“What a lovely scent,” Asuka’s disheveled form crept into the kitchen, allured by the aroma, “I am starving.”
Shinji looked over to her and flashed her a smile before attending to the stew again, “Another long day I assume?”
“Do you even need to ask? A very long day. What time is it even?” Asuka muttered.
“A little past 8.”
“There you go. That long a day.”
And it showed. Whatever sharp appearance she had conjured this morning was now completely gone. It looked like she had been engaged in physical combat rather than the consulting job she supposedly had. Her tie was loose and crooked, the first few buttons of her blouse now undone to let in some air. Her dark iron gray blazer was now wrinkled and creased and her hair looked like she had just gotten out of bed again.
Not to say Shinji looked any better. In fact, he actually did look the same as he when he had gotten out of bed. The only difference now was the cheap plaid apron thrown over his white shirt and sweatpants.
Asuka peeked over his shoulder into the pot, resting her chin on him, “This better be reheated.”
“Nope,” Shinji said, “fresh cooking out the pot.”
He felt a firm hand grip the back of his head and give it a shake, “Dummy, I told you to eat first whenever I’m this late for work.”
“I don’t mind, really,” Shinji said, letting her loosely thrash his head around a bit, “If you can endure it at work I certainly can here. Besides, eating with you is plenty worth it. Would you not say the same?”
Shinji now turned to her with a feigned pout.
Asuka scowled and pulled away, “it’s not like you can’t just eat first and sit there with me when I eat. Whatever, I’m gonna go change.”
Shinji heard her wander off to the bedroom as he switched the stove off.
***
Asuka returned in a loose t-shirt and pajama pants to a set dining table. They scarfed it down enthusiastically. When they finished she stood up with her empty bowl and swiped up Shinji’s as well, “It was good,” she said, leaving to put the dishes into the sink.
“See it’s nicer this way don’t you think?” Shinji leaned back onto his chair.
“What, having it ‘fresh off the pot?’” Asuka said, rinsing the bowls down.
“No,” Shinji stared absently in front of him, “having dinner with somebody else.”
Asuka let out a scoff and continued to rinse out the bowls. Shinji snuck a glance at her and saw a hint of a smile on her lips
And he smiled too.
They sat around on the couch and watched some television. Not anything live of course. They were DVD copies of some random season of a reality show. It served more of a backdrop to Asuka recounting her day while she rested her head on his lap.
Setbacks, uncompromising coworkers, problems, issues. She always had a lot to get off her chest. Shinji diligently lent an ear while fiddling with her long auburn hair.
After an hour or so, Asuka had expended what little remaining energy she had on rants and they decided to head to bed. Asuka silently put her arms out and Shinji scooped her up and carried her over down the hall and placed her in bed. She was practically asleep before her head hit the pillow.
It was never a good idea to spoil Asuka too much, but she had a long day today and she had to do it all again tomorrow. Shiji climbed into the covers next to her and could feel Asuka curl up closer beside him, her head softly nestled on his shoulder.
Shinji lied awake, staring up into the ceiling.
It had been 10 years.
10 years since Instrumentality.
It was odd. In the end, such a life changing event didn’t feel so life changing. When he ended Instrumentality, everything was different, but at the same time it wasn’t.
After he washed up on that beach, he expected to stand up on his feet as a brand new person. One who had learned, who had grown, who had accepted. But he vividly remembered staring over the horizon at the grotesque gargantuan face of Lilith, of Rei, frozen.
The things he had to do in Eva, The things he experienced in Instrumentality. The things he thought of people and the world. The hatred. The pain. The fear. The loneliness. They were all still there in him. And it was paralyzing.
When he ended Instrumentality, it wasn’t the reset he was hoping for. Just another chance to keep going. And in all honesty it was all beginning to spiral back to where he started.
Then Asuka showed up.
Shinji raised his hand in front of him. The same hand he used to drag Asuka onto the beach. The same hand that had wrapped around her throat. He stared at it through the darkness of the room, his eyes wide. The drone of silence in his ears.
He was scared when he saw her. She was a wrench thrown into the turmoil his psyche was already in.
Was she something he wanted to accept again or was she something he needed to dispose of? The final test to get that clean start? Had Instrumentality even ended? Did rejection still even exist? Could he even kill her?
He brought his hand down and brushed his cheek. The place Asuka had caressed him. He lowered his hand to where Asuka’s hand laid on top of him and softly gripped it, feeling her warmth, The hand she had used. .
She was here with him. Lying beside him. Just like then.
So different now, yet it wasn’t.
For a long time, it was just him and Asuka. Wandering around what was left of Japan. Trying to get by with whatever they could find and each other. They did it for 7 years and they got pretty damn good at it if Shinji would say so himself.
After a period of time living the nomadic life, they settled into a cushy mansion on the outskirts of what they eventually discovered to be Old Kyoto. They had amassed a surplus of supplies and were living rather comfortably before they realized that other people had been coming back for years already.
Shinji had half a mind to just stay as they were. He was pretty content with just him and Asuka. He was more than happy to give the rest of the world a chance to come back and find out their place on Earth, but as far as he was concerned that was up to them. Shinji felt he already found his. However, Asuka seemed a bit excited to see other people and Shinji would be lying if he said he never wanted to meet another soul again.
So now they were back in society. Living together in a small humble apartment in a desolate world trying to get back on its feet.
So different, yet it wasn’t.
Shinji gently lifted Asuka’s arm from around his waist and slipped out of bed. He quietly stepped out onto the balcony
Asuka didn’t like it when he smoked. Shinji didn’t really like it either, but he supposed that was the point.
Asuka couldn’t say much though given the fact she was the reason they had a secret stash of probably all the surviving wine from here back to New Tokyo-3.
.
He lit his cigarette and took a drag. He felt the breeze hit his face and carry the curling smoke away. It wasn’t exactly the cool crisp temperature he preferred. In fact, this particular September night was quite muggy.
Shinji took a seat in one of the balcony chairs and looked up at the night sky. He had seen this view for several years now but he’d be lying if he said he had gotten used to it. A murky black sky glittering with millions of stars. The galaxy on full display in front of him. Although they managed to restore a lot of power throughout the city, light pollution was still at an all time low.
Not even a satellite blemished the night sky as none had survived the events of Instrumentality. Of course, the trade off for this beautiful 100% natural view was the extinction of telecommunications. It was a topic of great discussion during the rebuild process, but they concluded they had neither the resources nor the coordination to be building phone towers or conducting any satellite space launches any time soon. They had a few radio towers that they took advantage of, including sending a message out to the rest of the world.
Was anyone out there?
They had yet to receive any answers.
The fate of the rest of the world outside of Kyoto seemed to be left unknown for now.
It was a lonely thought, but Shinji never travelled much anyways. He had never even been out of Japan, the only exception being when he met Asuka for the first time in the Pacific.The rest of the world was just pictures and imagination to him. Just like now.
So different, yet it wasn’t
And they very much could still be all alone. They knew not everyone was back because it was still there. It was harder to see at night but he could spot it now. The red ring of souls that streaked across the sky, circling the planet.
It was proof not everyone was here. Not everyone was ready.
Maybe they never would be.
Shinji looked back through the balcony doors at Asuka lying in bed under the covers. He watched her figure rise and fall with each breath. Asuka was on the provisional council in Old Kyoto trying to rebuild the city. It had nothing to do with her former status as an Eva pilot, or her connections with NERV. In fact, Shinji was pretty confident no one here even knew what those were at all. People here needed anyone they could and Asuka’s decisiveness and fiery passion was a good fit for the job. Shinji had considered helping out too, but he didn’t see himself fit for the job. He was content with taking care of things at home.
He turned back again to make sure Asuka wasn’t awake and put out his cigarette in the ashtray on the balcony table. Shiji’s eyes wandered upwards again and stopped.
They only lived on the second story of their complex, but they still had a pretty good view of Kyoto or rather what was left of it. But something new had joined the ruins of the skyline. The silhouette slowly stepped over the buildings like they were stones on the road. Kyoto was never known for its towering cityscape but this thing would have easily stood on par with the tallest skyscrapers of any city. My god, It was huge, enormous.
It treaded on four long legs and had what looked like antlers, like a deer, but its head hung low, like a dog or wolf. That’s where the resemblance to any creature on earth stopped.
The inky black body was accented by bony white projections that ran along its back and legs giving it a jaggy appearance. It was like a mountain in both size and appearance. Its legs were solid and sturdy. Its head was carved out like a skull and he could see four bright glowing eyes. It swung to and fro as it surveyed the land below it.
Shinji stared at the creature, stupefied.
“An angel?” he whispered to himself.
As if it heard him, he saw the creature turn, straining its neck, until it was looking directly at Shinji and he felt a chill go down his back. Its eyes were glowing, but Shiji could feel a hollowness behind them. As if it wasn’t even alive. Its gaze was cold, alien. It was an abyss.
It opened its mouth and it screamed.
Shinji gasped and felt his chair tip over backwards. His reflexes kicked in and he managed to twist his weight to the side so as to not slam the back of his head, but no matter what he knew this wasn’t going to end well. There was a heavy thud as he slammed onto his side, sprawling out of the chair. The loud crash echoed through the quiet night before everything faded back to silence.
Shinji laid here for a moment letting out a quiet groan. He weakly looked back over his shoulder inside.
Didn’t look like Asuka had stirred. Good.
He shakily got back onto his feet and looked back over the balcony at a monster-free skyline. His breathing rate had spiked. He could feel another passing breeze brush against his burning face drenched in sweat.
Shinji has had chilling nightmares about Angels before. It was a frequent problem then and even now he and Asuka would occasionally be struck with one.
But this was way different. He sure as hell wasn’t asleep. And those nightmares could get real intense but this was something else. It felt so real. So vivid.
What the hell was that?
***
The screeching buzz of their alarm stirred the two people in bed. Shinji reached over and clicked it off before sitting up with a yawn. After the strange vision he had, Shinji had quite the restless night to say the least, but he still managed to squeeze in some rest. He loudly sighed and rubbed his temples before turning to Asuka lying beside him. He gently shook her shoulder.
Asuka loudly groaned and rolled over to him, burying her face in his stomach, “don’t make me go,” she whined, her voice muffled in his shirt, “I’m going to call in sick.”
“You can’t do that, Asuka,” Shinji chuckled, “come on. I’ll get some coffee going for you.”
Asuka let out another groan of despair before Shinji playfully tossed her aside..
He swung out of bed and stepped out of the room. Asuka watched him leave.
***
He could hear the sound of running water come and go as Asuka completed her quick morning shower. Shinji sat in the kitchen silently staring at the coffee maker, still thinking about that dream. That wasn’t even an Angel he had seen before. Maybe he was jumping to conclusions assuming it was an Angel, but what else could it be?
“Coffee ready?” Asuka appeared next to him. Shinji jumped at the question. He looked over at the silent coffee maker with their brew ready. It had been for some time.
“Oh, it looks like it. Let me pour you some,” Shinji said.
***
“I’m off,” Asuka said, coffee in one hand and a curt wave with the other. She was all showered and dressed up again, ready for another day, another battle.
“Be safe,” Shinji smiled.
Asuka stood there at the doorway for a moment. Shinji cocked his head, “what’s wrong, forget something?”
“No, no,” she said quietly. She paused for a moment before blurting out, “are you okay?”
“Me?” Shinji asked.
“Yeah, you seemed kind of, I don’t know, off this morning.”
Shinji scratched his head. They had only been awake for one hour and she had been in the shower for half that time. Shinji sometimes couldn’t tell if it was scary or touching how fast Asuka could sniff out when something was bothering him. Maybe he was just that bad at hiding it.
“It’s nothing, just a little tired this morning” he tried to wave off with a smile, “you should get to work.”
“Don’t even try that, you’re a terrible liar,” Asuka jeered. She shuffled her feet, “you don’t need to hide anything you know. From me.”
The Asuka he knew 10 years ago would probably have given up her own life before she even thought of saying something so from the heart. And the Shinji from 10 years ago probably would have done something similar before he answered.
But their connection in Instrumentality and the 10 years they spent together had yielded some fruit. They had all but mastered the art of understanding and dealing with each other. That’s not to say they were on the same wavelength every time, but it was generally a waste of time to try and hide something from the other. Like he was doing now.
No AT fields here.
Shinji sighed and stepped up to Asuka. He laced his hand with hers which Asuka looked up to him in surprise at his sudden approach.
“It’s a long story. It was just another nightmare last night. It kind of got to me, but I’m okay. I’ll tell you when you get back. Sorry for worrying you,” Shinji leaned down and gave her a soft reassuring kiss on the forehead. Shinji had outpaced Asuka in height over the years.
“Hmph,” Asuka huffed, “no need to be sorry. You better tell me all about it tonight got it? It’s going to be bothering me alllll~ day,” she sang innocuously. “If you’re going to be all frazzled, try and take it easy for the day today, okay? I shouldn’t be late again so I’ll make dinner.’
“I’ll be fine, no need to baby me, Asuka,” Shinji said.
“You are a baby,” Asuka stuck her tongue out at him, but she cracked into a giggle when Shinji clutched his heart, hyperbolically reeling from the insult.
“I’m the one who carried you to bed last night, you know,” Shinji said.
“Don’t make me pour the rest of my adult coffee on you before I head to my adult job,” Asuka said, smugly tugging on her suit.
“I guess that means you’re ready to make your own coffee in the morning and wash all your own clothes.”
“Wait, no, Shinji, I didn’t mean it,” she said sweetly.
They both burst into another fit of laughter. Just like everyday, Shinji wondered what he would do without her.
“I better go now for real.” She said once more, “I’m off.”
“Be safe.”
The Wind of Change
Shinji’s morning routine usually consisted of simple household chores. Today he had to do some laundry. The plumbing system was dubious in Kyoto as a whole but it was pretty reliable in a couple populated areas of Kyoto thanks to a team of diligent plumbers that stepped up.
He tossed all the clothes in the washing machine and ran the load. He laid out all of Asuka’s formal clothes she used for work. She was running out of clean ones to wear, he would need to head over for dry cleaning soon. Maybe tomorrow. It was amazing how much some people still cared about appearances even in these times. It would have been funny if it weren’t so outrageous.
Shinji next went to knock out the dishes. He was never over how fast two people could fill up a sink with dirty dishes. He went through scrubbing down all the plates and bowls. He put the last plate into the drying rack and turned off the sink. But as he turned away he could still faintly hear the sound of running water. He knitted his eyebrows and turned back to the sink. The faucet stood motionless.
He looked over the washing machine but it was also motionless, done with its cycle. Shinji could still hear it though. The sound of water. It was louder now but still muted. It was coming from outside.
Shinji walked up to the window and stared.
Titanic volumes of water were rushing down the streets. It was a flash flood with a clear sky.
Shinji opened the window and stuck his head outside watching as the torrent of water washed away everything in the street below him. He looked around trying to see where it was coming from, but it seemed like it was coming from every street alley and around every corner of the block. When suddenly the smell hit him.
His eyes widened and he looked back down at the water. It wasn’t water. Was it blood?
No. LCL. He was certain.
He looked up again and saw her. Hovering above the flood of LCL in the alleyway across from him.
Stop this.
His head started to ring and a sharp pain stabbed through his head. It felt like someone skewered a cold rod down his ears. Shinji clutched both sides of his head and he pulled back into the kitchen. He staggered around blindly and felt himself slam against one of the walls and slide down onto the floor. The roar of the water seemed to be getting even louder even as he covered his ears, it was like it was piercing directly in his head.
Even through the flashing pain of his head, he could feel his feet get wet. Then his ankles, his knees. Shinji peeked out of one of his skewered eyes and saw that the LCL was beginning to fill up the apartment and rapidly. Shinji scrambled back up to his feet, but couldn’t do any more than that. He could himself completely lose control of his breathing, hyperventilating. His body froze up.
The LCL wouldn’t stop. It climbed up past his waist, his shoulders, his chin. Just as it was about to consume him once more, Shinji let out a shout.
He fell to his knees onto the kitchen floor trying to get his breathing under control. The floor was dry, the only signs of any fluid was his own perspiration dripping down his soaked forehead.
Something was going on. This wasn’t right. What was happening to him?
Well right now he was pretty sure he was having a panic attack or something. He needed to calm down.
Shinji staggered over to one of the cabinets and pulled out a bottle of pills they had. He placed it in front of him and took a deep breath. They had been making an effort to rely on these less and less. Mostly because pharmaceutical drugs were a pretty limited resource right now. Shinji shouted in frustration and returned the bottle to the cabinet.
He went to the bedroom and clambered around for his cigarettes. He swore when he remembered he left them out in the balcony last night. He stood in front of the balcony door and sighed. No, he probably shouldn’t be doing that either. Asuka didn’t like it. Plus, he wasn’t about to go outside and possibly get assaulted by some hallucination again.
Instead, Shinji headed back into the kitchen and poured himself a glass of sake. He gave it a swig. Depressant, right? Is that how it worked? Shinji swallowed it quickly. He never did like the taste of alcohol and his face contorted into the shape of disgust as it went down his throat. He could feel the buzz though. He grabbed the sake bottle and was about to pour himself another glass when he smacked his lips a couple time. Man, he really didn’t like the taste. And was this really a better way. Probably not. Asuka wouldn’t be pleased to come home to him wasted. She would probably be more upset that he drank her alcohol.
With another shout, Shinji put the sake bottle back and instead poured himself a glass of water now.
He stomped over to the radio player in the living room and pressed play and flopped onto the sofa trying to control his racing breath and thoughts. He expected one of his more soothing classical music CDs to start playing but instead, one of Asuka’s rock CDs started to let it rip.
Shinji growled in frustration, but he didn’t make a move to change it. He lay there on the sofa with his eyes closed. Trying to distract himself with it. Meditating. It was only 1040.
***
Shinji eyed the clock. 1740.
He had another vision. A couple hours back. He had turned on the television to pass the time and help get his mind off things but the brightness suddenly intensified until he couldn’t see. Even when he turned away, even when he had closed his eyes he could feel the burning light. It scorched his eyes, his skin, his mind And he saw the afterimage of her again. He didn’t want to see her.
He wanted to see Asuka. She should be home any minute now.
Shinji sat on the floor in the living room, with his eyes closed, waiting. The rock music still playing in the background. He should have changed it, but he was too scared to even move.
Shinji heard a knock at the front door and instantly got to his feet and bolted for the door. He needed to see Asuka. He needed to feel her touch, hear her words.
He fumbled over the lock, flipping it open in a frenzy and went to open the door when Asuka knocked on the door again. And Shinji froze, his hand hovering over the door knob. The sound of the knock ringing in his ear. It had hit him. He was so focused on seeing Asuka that he barely even registered it.
Asuka had the keys, why the hell was she knocking?
Shinji’s eyes slowly drifted to the door.
“Who is it?” he asked.
He was answered with silence. He felt his spine tingle as a chill went down his body. He was reminded that no one else actually lived in the complex with them.
“Who is it?” he asked again, louder, more aggressively.
This time, he heard a soft squeak. But not from the other side of the door. Shinji’s eyes darted to the door knob.
It had begun to turn.
Shinji’s hand snapped to the door knob but it was too late. Something slammed into the door, swinging it open. Shinji braced and shouldered into it, stopping it in its tracks. With a shout, he pushed forward and slammed it back close. His hand went for the lock, but whatever was one the other side responded with another voracious push, popping the door back open.
“Stop! What are you doing!” Shinji frantically shouted as he struggled to push back.
This time, Shinji was terrified to hear someone respond, “Please, let me in!”
It was the voice of a young child. A boy no older than twelve begging for his life. He was screaming at the top of his lungs through tears. “Let me in, Mister! Please!”
“You need to relax first, please stop!”
“Please let me inside!”
Shinji would have been inclined to be more cooperative but the impact coming from behind the door was ravenous with more force than any child would have had. Each voracious impact felt like it would just break the door. It was banging, rapping against it, shoving up against it in desperation, crying, shouting. The beating against the door droned in his ear.
“Mister, you need to let me in! Please let me in! Why won’t you let me in!”
Shinji just gritted his teeth and put his back up against the door to force it close.Trying to block out the shouting and the pounding on the other side of the door.
This isn't real, this isn’t real, this isn’t real.
“Ikari-kun.”
This voice came from inside the house. No, he didn’t want to hear that. He didn’t want this. Shinji closed his eyes and put his hands over his ears and he screamed, “Stay away!”
“Shinji, it’s me, let me inside!” Asuka’s voice now rang from the other side, “Are you okay?”
This one caught him more off guard. He felt his eyes bolt open and his body slack. The door pushed against him one more time and he felt himself sprawl forward. The door swung open and he quickly scrambled to his feet, body tense.
Asuka stood at the doorway looking up and down at him, panting, her eyes widened in panic, “Shinji…?” her voice trailed off seeing the wild look in his eyes, the state he was in. She took a step forward into the house, “what are you doing? What’s wrong?”
She wasn’t real. She wasn’t real.
“Get back!” Shinji shouted. He stomped forward, feigning a pounce.
Asuka flinched, but held her ground.
“Shinji, it’s me,” she pleaded tearfully, “please, calm down.”
Asuka again took a careful step forward.
Shinji stood there and quietly let her take another step. Then another. He wanted her to be real. His desire for Asuka to really be here was greater than any fear he felt of whatever else could be happening. He kept a steely watchful eye on her but allowed her to reach him.
Asuka slowly and gently took his hand and placed it on her cheek, “Hey, it’s me, see?”
She reached out and now put her other hand on his cheek. She drew closer until their noses were almost touching. He could feel her breath against his lips. Her hand carefully squeezed his, “it’s me, stupid,” she said again under her breath.
After a beat, Shinji wrapped her in a hug and he could feel Asuka return the embrace. He half expected her to just vanish, or eat him, or something, still not convinced this wasn’t another apparition. But she never did. They dropped to the floor, tangled together.
She was here with him.
They lay there hugging each other for a few moments, Asuka trying to anchor Shinji back to reality. She had a lot of questions, but she knew he wasn’t in a state to do any explaining just yet. But softly, from the living room she could hear something.
“Is that one of my German Rock CD’s playing?” Asuka pulled back, with a small smile.
“It’s just what was in the player,” Shiji said defensively.
Asuka threw her head back in a laugh. She got to her feet and offered a hand to him, “Mr. Ikari, could I have this dance?”
“Why Ms. Langley, you are too kind,” Shinji took her hand and they twirled into the living room. Asuka leaned back and cranked up the volume before returning to Shinji’s arms. Even after 10 years they were still far from decent dancers, but they didn’t have to be. They moved through the room, swaying to the beat of the soft rock, heads resting on each other. Maybe this music wasn’t so bad, Shinji thought.
Angel attacks.
Instrumentality.
Post-apocalyptic world.
Whatever this was, they would face it together, just like they had then.
So different, yet it wasn’t.
That was the last thing Shinji remembered.
A bright ray of sunshine pierced his eyes. Shinji flinched and raised one of his hands to shield his eyes. He was holding a payphone in one of his hands. Shinji frowned in confusion. He hesitantly placed the phone back on the receiver and looked around.
The first thing he noticed wasn’t the crumbling buildings crawling with vegetation. It wasn’t the rusting cars lined up on the torn up roads. It wasn’t the ghostly uneasy feeling of a completely empty metro area, devoid of human life.
It was a young girl. Staring back at him from a distance.
Suddenly, a flock of birds scattered into the air behind him. Shinji looked up and watched them disappear into the sky. He looked back over.
The girl was gone.
And the deafening drone of heavy military gunships slowly enveloped his ears.
TO BE CONTINUED