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Andrew had laughed when he was old enough to really understand his soulmate mark, the number of times the first words a person spoke to him were the same that were written on his forearm seemed already to be more than he could comprehend. The older he got the more that number increases, his presence (and maybe a bit of his actions) lead their first words to always be "Fuck you." By the time he made it to PSU he was sure to never rely on those words to indicate his soulmate, laughing at the idea. The frequency was alarming, but Andrew wasn't searching anyway. He knew how to have fun and he knew where to draw the line. He was focused on getting off probation, getting off the meds, and maybe one day he wouldn't feel like driving his car through a retaining wall.
He traced the words repetitively through his arm band as he prepared for take off to middle of no where Arizona at Kevin's insistence that this unknown striker from Millport was worth their time. He didn't need to see the words to know where they were. He had burned their position into his muscle memory during the long days in juvi where he wasn't allowed the privilege of his armbands. The other boys had found his soulmate mark to be hilarious, even those he had never spoken to would flaunt it his way when he passed by, making sure they were the first words they spoke. Andrew had gotten used to it, and whether he planned it or not, started being the one to say the first words or to say nothing at all. Kevin threw Neil's folder at him, partially as a distraction, but mostly to do homework.
"Read it," Kevin glanced over, "It gives you something else to do besides fidget for 4 hours."
"I don't care about him." But he flipped the folder open and stared down at the unimpressionable team photo of Neil. A blank stare and and absolutely unmemorable expression. He looked like every other 17 year old high school boy. He curled his lips before closing the folder back up and throwing it to the floor at Kevin's feet.
"You're going to."
"I doubt your newest project is worthy of my concern. How about you find someone that isn't a complete disaster this time. Matt going to find this one in the tub with his wrists slit this time?"
Kevin glared at him, full of ice and anger. He didn't appreciate the failure of his last recruitment coming back on him. He knew she was unstable, he just didn't realize it went that far. "This one is better, sounds like the parents are causing most of his," Kevin paused thoughtfully, "issues. When he's at Palmetto he won't have them there and should hopefully be able to heal with a little work from Betsy."
Andrew laughed, loud and unrestrained as a fake smile slit his face in a grin. "Oh that's rich." he pushed his feet against the seat in front of him, glaring at the person when they turned around. "I'm not reading his file, I'm only coming along because I have to make sure no one get's their hands on you. You're going to let me sleep most of this flight."
Kevin sneered at him but let him pull the hood over his face and cross his arms over his chest. He picked the folder back up from the floor before flipping through it again for the the tenth time. He was sure this Neil was the one, he just hoped that no one had beaten them there for any last round recruiting.
--
They landed in Phoenix Sky Harbor with little issue, a mostly smooth flight that Andrew had managed to sleep through, Kevin had agreed to hold onto him meds during the trip, letting him come down to sleep on the plane in a chance shot to mitigate his anxiety.
They piled into the car that Wymack had rented, Kevin handing over the meds as they start to pull away from the airport. Andrew swallowed them dry, grimacing as they made the way down his throat. They made their was easily down the road to Millport, the hour long drive taking the anticipated amount of time with no unplanned stops. They pulled up in front of Millport high School, the stands moderately filled as they got out to join the them in the bleacher seats. Andrew was quick to lay down ignoring literally everything around him as Kevin and Wymack watched the game with intensity.
Millport lost but they had got what they came to see. The video of Neil's playing was more than enough in the first place, seeing him play on the field was even better. With a good team and some work Kevin had faith that he could make Neil become something better than good. He said as much to Wymack, wanting to go through with the recruitment.
Kevin let Wymack go to Hernandez, talking to him about Neil's parents and asking when he could speak with Neil. Hernandez had said that Neil was always last to leave and they could easily talk to him once everyone left. Andrew and Kevin hung out in the lounge outside of the locker rooms while Hernandez and Wymack went to talk to Neil first.
It didn't take long for Andrew to get bored waiting, going through the lounge and finding things to occupy his time. Kevin sat on the entertainment center along the back wall, moving the TV out of the way to give himself more room, patiently waiting for the decision of their new hopeful. Andrew found an exy racket leaning against a wall and picked it up, inspecting the strings, testing how taught they were before he started to spin the racket around his hand and arm. He didn't do well with idle sitting when he was buzzing to not be high anymore, he wanted that come down that was promised to him for the flight back, he needed to get a few minutes of quiet in his mind and travelling made the medicated high that much worse. He focused back on the racket and the sounds of voices becoming louder through the hallway.
He heard feet pounding against the tile floor, coming towards them at a speed too fast for indoors, Andrew moved a few steps over, swung the racket back over his head and waited a beat for the foot falls to be closer before he brought the racket down, swooping it in a big arch, slamming it into his stomach, knocking the air out of Neil as he dropped to his knees on the floor.
Andrew looked over Neil as Wymack yelled at him, exchanging snarkiness with him over damaging their newest recruit. Eventually Neil grabbed at his stomach and looked up at him with the fiery eyes. Andrew was a bit taken aback at the pure rage that was veiled there, not far enough down that Andrew wouldn't see it. His lips was pulled up into a sneer and Andrew thought this one might be a little entertaining. He saluted him, smiling as he said, "Better luck next time."
Neil looked even more angered but a little bit shocked as he spit out a harsh "Fuck you."
Inside Neil was a little panicked. He had never heard the words that were etched into his rib cage spoken outload to him. He had always thought the idea of an actual soulmate, of meeting them, was completely ridiculous. It still seemed that way as he struggled to breath air into his lungs looking up at the twisted face of Andrew Minyard who moved over him with a racket perched on his shoulder. Neil could barely listen as Hernandez helped him up and then left the room, leaving Neil alone with Andrew and Wymack. It wasn't until Wymack made it obvious that Kevin had flown there as well did Kevin make his presence noticed.
Neil forgot about the soul mark, forgot about everything but the image of his father slicing a man into pieces in front of him and Kevin at Castle Evermore. His stomach fell out of his body as he stared up at Kevin on the entertainment center. The showing of his possible soulmate eclipsed by his horrendous past suddenly showing up at his High School, all the hiding and running he had done was not good enough. He had been found out, he hadn't done a good job since his mother passed away. She would be so upset with him, so upset that he didn't even make a few more years.
Even more upset that it wasn't his dad that found him- but Kevin Day.
He couldn't wait to run, he needed to get back to the house to calm his nerves before he skipped town. While internally making his plan to leave he argued back and forth with Kevin, trying to figure out why they'd want him to join him out of all the exy players in highs school. Plenty hadn't been drafted to a team yet that were still in high school. But Kevin seemed dead set on him joining the foxes, on him being on their team as a striker. They traded intense words, Wymack pressing him to sign with their team, offering Neil a lift back home so he could quickly talk to his mom and get an answer.
When Wymack ordered Kevin and Andrew to the car Neil grew paranoid. He didn't trust this man even though he knew of the good he did. He watched Kevin pick up the files spread over the entertainment center and meet up with Andrew at the door before they left, before he turned back to Wymack to face the music.
Wymack zeroed in on Neil, asking if his parents were the ones that hurt him, asking if he needed to talk to his parents for him. Offering to fly him out to South Carolina early if they were the ones causing his issues, that it would be no trouble for him to be there early since Andrew's crew was already going to be there for the summer. Wymack didn't push his situation, he didn't ask questions he knew Neil couldn't answer, instead he offered solutions to issues he only could imagine existed. He was there to provide the foxes the chance they wouldn't get anywhere else, and Neil felt like it might be his only chance to live out the next year while still getting to play. He knew that's what he wanted most out of his life and here he was being handed that opportunity.
Wymack gave him a date they'd pick up from the airport, immediately after graduation. He didn't wait for Neil's acceptance, probably seeing the war on his face. He just assumed that Neil was going to say yes, that Neil was going to sign. He knew that they could protect Neil and he wouldn't be safest with the foxes even if it didn't feel that way. Neil let a quiet thank you escape his lips and Wymack seemed satisfied enough with that as an answer before he Wymack went to find Hernandez. Neil ran to dry heave in the toilet. Nervous, excited, feeling like he was letting his mom down. She would be furious if she was still alive, so it's a good thing that she wasn't.
He got ahold of himself, wondering what the next year was going to be like, the feeling of having a future when he was never allowed to feel that way before... Neil felt like he was going to be sick again. He put his paperwork away and went back to the lounge where the two coaches were waiting. He walked passed them before going outside. Andrew opened the door to Hernandez's SUV but Neil walked by like he hadn't even saw him.
Andrew smiled at him, "Too good to play with us, too good to ride with us?" Neil glanced back at him before he took off in a jog to the edge of the lot. By the time he got there he was in a full run, desperate to get away, desperate to take a breath.
---
Neil got off the plane and made his way down to arrivals, looking out for the the ride that Wymack said would be waiting for him. He was easy to spot despite his short stature, his stare drawing Neil to him like it would be impossible to look away. Neil judged him to not be Andrew since he looked calm, he assumed him to be Aaron. He met up with them and let him be lead out to the car in short term parking. They drove to Wymack's, where Neil would be staying through the summer until the dorms opened back up.
Outside of Wymack's apartment were Nicky, Kevin, and Andrew. They exchanged greetings before going up to Wymack's apartment, Neil felt caged in, like the group of boys would slowly decrease in space around him and swallow him whole. He always felt closed in and gripped his duffle bag closer to his body as he walked passed the threshold. Little things started to stand out with his interactions with the group and he was slowly becoming more suspicious that his ride from the airport wasn't who he thought he was. The wrong person answering, the pack of cigarettes disappearing from their rightful owner, things weren't adding up. With a shock he realized that he was seeing Andrew unmedicated, pretending to be his own twin in some kind of game he probably enjoyed playing with new people. Neil announced his thoughts with no amount of self preservation as he stood in Wymack's apartment with the other four men.
After a moment of silence followed by some rushed German uttered between Nicky and Aaron, Neil released his tongue and let his new teammates get to know a sliver of the person he really is. "I'd prefer an answer in English."
Andrew erased his forced smile before he answered, methodical, planned, like he knew someday someone might come along and see through his fun and games. "That sounds like and accusation, but I didn't lie to you."
"Omission is the easiest way to lie. You could have corrected me."
Andrew shrugged, not interested any long in the line of questioning. "Could have, didn't. Figure it out for yourself."
"I did." Neil mocked Andrews salute from their first meeting, thoughts of the first words he spoke to him rising bile up into his throat. He swallowed it down as he uttered out a confident, "Better luck next time." The words on his side burned, he resisted the urge to run his hand over his ribs to ebb the flare up. It was the first time he'd ever said them out loud, despite the hours he would spend tracing them as a child, despite memorizing the shape in the mirror when he would be alone in the restroom - the only time he was ever alone while he and his mother were on the run. Uttering them out loud made them more real, made Andrew that much more likely to be his soulmate. It was hard to imagine the man in front of him mocking him and teasing that he might actually be interesting be his soulmate, be the one who would truly understand him.
Neil was knocked out of his thoughts when the door knob rattled. He watched as the men hid a bottle of whiskey with practiced ease as they escaped out the front door passed Wymack to leave Neil alone with him for the first time ever. He felt a cold chill run over his body as he anticipated what surely would happen sooner than later when he agreed to stay on Coach's couch. His fear was lifted when he was invited out to the court and suddenly all thoughts of being alone, of soul marks, of anything but Exy were gone when he imagined getting to run along the court there.
After stashing his bag in the cabinet Wymack let him use and getting his own ring of keys he took off with the group, joining them in the elevator.
---
"I know that you hate me. It's ok," Neil said, pulling the cigarette to his lips. He still tasted the cheap liquor on his tongue as he leaned back onto his hands.
"Every inch of you."
"Can I tell you something?"
Andrew eyed him suspiciously, he wasn't sure what Neil was going to even say to him, why he would get consent to open his mouth. "Do I want to know?"
Neil leaned forwards, coming off his hands and bringing them to the end of his pant leg. He fiddled with the hem, worrying at the cigarette in his lips. "Probably not."
Andrew leaned over and stole the cigarette, taking a long drag and then tossing it off the roof with a flick. "I have a feeling you're going to tell me either way, so you might as well get it over with."
"You know how we both don't believe in fate?"
Andrew narrowed his eyes, nodding his head almost imperceptibly.
"And think that soul marks are a bit of a joke," Neil paused, trying to get his words together. "I want to show you mine, but I would like to see yours in return. A truth for a truth."
Andrew scowled at him, flashing his teeth in anger. "What's the point?"
"I think that you need to see mine." Neil pulled up his hoodie and t-shirt, not looking at Andrew as he pulled it up over his scars, over the wounds that littered his stomach and chest. On his left side, midway down his rib cage were the words "better luck next time" in bold black letters. they stood out on his skin like a lighthouse at the edge of the sea. It drew Andrew in, his cigarette dropping from his lips and he shifted forward to look closer at his skin. He could hear his breathing change, he could feel him get close. He kept looking away, fearing that if he looked over he would break the spell of them together on the rooftop.
Neil knew he would remember their meeting, remember the first words that he had said to him after smashing the racket into his stomach. He didn't want to lose Andrew, he had become a constant welcome presence in his life and he didn't want to know what would happen if this drove him away like he guessed it would.
He felt a hand come up to his side, get impossibly close but never touch. "It's fine." Andrew snorted with the phrase, thinking Neil was being a little cheeky. But the hand still came to touch, light fingertips ghosting over the words like he was trying to commit them to memory, even though he already had. Neil's skin scrawled and he felt like his side was on fire. the touch making him want to pull Andrew closer and put lips on lips. He waited, letting Andrew take in his fill.
When he finally pulled back Neil met Andrews face, it was blank, a little intoxicated from the liquor but still fully present. Andrew stared Neil down as he spoke, "Do you remember your first words to me?"
Neil beamed, remembering them now without the pain. He actually found it funny, until he thought that if Andrew had those words written on his body it would be a cruel twist of fate. He let his smile drop as he said them out loud between them, "Fuck you," it was whispered, like he couldn't breath, like he was saying them again from the same situation.
Andrew reached up to his left armband and removed it, putting it on the ground between them before shoving his arm to Neil.
Neil looked over it with curious eyes, bypassing the scars that littered his arm like mini ladders. Ignoring how deep some of them were, ignoring how much his heart hurt when he looked down at them. Bold and angry letters read "fuck you" loud and clear on the skin, there were scars running through the letters and around them, like Andrew had tried to erase them from his skin. They had come back darker than ever, short of losing the limb there wasn't really a way to remove the soul marks. Neil didn't move to touch, feeling that being allowed to even see the soul mark was more than anyone else was allowed.
"When did yours appear?" he whispered.
"I was seven."
"I was five. Mine felt like a warning. I didn't know how true it would be over the next ten years."
"You don't believe in fate."
"Neither do you." Neil bumped his shoulder. Neil stared out over the campus they could see from their dorm rooftop. "But this is something I want to believe in." he gestured between the two of them.
"There is no this."
Neil snorted, "Right, and I am nothing."
"Right." Neil could feel the eye boring into the side of his face, he could feel the stare like it had been on him his whole life. Something he was used to, something that made him feel comfortable.
"And you said it yourself, you want nothing."
"You're impossible."
Neil felt a hand on his neck, pulling him to meet Andrew's lips. They stayed on the roof until Neil couldn't feel his fingers, finally deciding to go back into the dorm.