Chapter Text
It had snowed overnight and the chill in the air lingered even into the late afternoon, causing slippery spots on the sidewalks as Castiel hurried across campus to the library. He still wasn’t used to being able to feel the cold so acutely and he found the stinging sensation of the air against his face incredibly unpleasant. If he’d known what winters would feel like with his failing grace, he might have insisted on moving further south.
Once he was inside the library it was warm and quiet. It was early enough in the semester that there weren’t many students studying in the space so it was sure to be a slow evening shift.
“Hey Cas,” his coworker Abby greeted him as he passed her to put his coat away. He still wore his trench coat regularly, but had adopted a more casual wardrobe otherwise, gravitating to soft sweaters and button-ups that had fun patterns instead of his old suit and tie. However, Dean had been right when he told Castiel that the trench coat wouldn’t be warm enough during the dead of winter. Next year Castiel would make sure he was properly prepared for the cold.
“Your guy is a mechanic, right?” Abby asked as Castiel took his seat next to her at the circulation desk.
When Castiel had applied to the library nearly a year ago they were looking for someone to cover the closing shift. It ended up working out well since Dean’s job at the garage started and ended early, so one of them was always home with Jack. They weren’t ready to enroll Jack in daycare until he had better control over his powers and didn’t occasionally “pull a Matilda,” as Dean would say, by making electronics randomly turn on and off and occasionally levitating small objects. Thanks to an expertly forged resume and glowing references from Donna, Jody, and Sam, Castiel been hired at the library less than a month after applying.
Abby was his primary colleague for the closing shift. She was in her mid-twenties and Castiel found that she was good company, unobtrusive when he wasn’t in the mood to chat but also always willing to get into long-winded discussions about whatever one of them was reading that day if he was feeling social.
During his first week, he’d brought photos in to decorate his desk, something that appeared to be customary in the staff office. He’d chosen a photo of himself and Claire, a group photo from the last time Sam and Eileen had visited, and right in the middle was a photo of Dean holding Jack.
“Cute kid,” Abby had said when she noticed, “is he your son?”
“Yes, that’s Jack,” Castiel had answered.
“And… your partner?” She’d asked hesitantly, as though he may be angry if she’d assumed incorrectly.
Castiel had paused, knowing what the implication would be if he said yes. And he knew that Dean probably wouldn’t like it. But the truth was that he and Dean were partners in every way that mattered except romantically. They lived together, had fought battles alongside each other, and they were co-parenting a child. It was also just the most straightforward explanation he could hope for.
“Yes,” he’d finally answered.
“Cool,” Abby had clearly been relieved that he wasn’t offended by the assumption. “You don’t have to worry about anyone here, you know. I’m pretty sure half the staff isn’t straight, myself included.”
Something about her nonchalant acceptance had set Castiel at ease. He had been nervous that his new coworkers would find him odd or off-putting, but so far he seemed to fit in. “That’s good to know,” he’d replied and they’d been friends ever since.
“Yes, that’s correct,” Castiel answered. “Dean is a mechanic.”
“Do you have a card or something for his shop?” Abby asked. “Leah’s been complaining about this rattling noise in her car for weeks but she refuses to bring it anywhere because she’s convinced that every mechanic she’s ever been to is a scam artist. You didn’t marry a scam artist, right?”
It was hard not to laugh as he thought about Dean’s trail of fake FBI badges and hacked credit cards.
“We’re not married, but no he isn’t a scam artist.” It didn’t feel like a lie when he knew that Dean was never the type to take advantage of anyone who needed his help. “I can give you his cell number and let him know to expect a text from Leah.”
“Thank you,” Abby said, “she’s so stubborn she’s been trying to figure it out herself through youtube videos. I’m afraid she’s actually going to hurt herself.” She rolled her eyes but the smile on her face was fond even as she complained about her girlfriend’s stubbornness.
“I can empathise,” Castiel said, with his own smile. “When we first moved, Dean was convinced that he could install a garbage disposal by himself. We ended up with a half flooded kitchen and no disposal at all.” They’d also decided that a garbage disposal was not only more trouble than it was worth, but probably a bad idea to have in a house with a baby who seemed to be able to control electronics with his grace. That part wasn’t something he added when telling the story to Abby.
Coming back from the dead yet again had been… jarring. Even more so than usual thanks to the circumstances surrounding his death and Jack’s birth. Despite his track record, Castiel hadn’t been expecting to be brought back to life again.
The first thing he’d done, of course, was call Dean. What else was there to do? Within a matter of hours Castiel had heard the familiar purr of the Impala and suddenly Dean had been walking toward where he was still lingering outside the phone booth, afraid to stray too far in case he somehow missed Dean’s arrival.
“Cas,” Dean had said, voice rough as he’d pulled Castiel into a hug. Castiel had been able to feel tears pricking at the edges of his eyes as the relief of having Dean here, solid and real, had coursed through him.
“Welcome home, buddy,” Dean had clapped Castiel on the back as he’d pulled away. “Now, there’s someone you should meet.”
Dean had led Castiel over to where Sam was standing outside the Impala, holding a blanket-wrapped bundle in his arms. “Hey Cas,” he’d said, extending the blanket toward Castiel, “meet Jack.”
Meeting Jack, holding him for the first time, Castiel had felt a surge of love swell inside of him that he wasn’t prepared for. He’d also felt such relief upon seeing a baby who had clearly been well cared for in his absence. Jack was bigger than Castiel had expected, but that was just proof of how long he’d been gone, how much he had missed.
Everything about Jack was perfect. His round little cheeks, bright blue eyes, fuzzy blond hair, Castiel could spend hours observing every tiny detail. He did just that, taking in everything about Jack that he could in the light of the passing streetlamps as they drove back to the bunker.
The pale blue light, low murmur of the television, and Dean snoring on the couch greeted Castiel when he arrived home. A fond smile curled at Castiel’s lips as he took in the sight of Dean looking so relaxed in a way that Castiel rarely used to see. Dean often insisted on waiting for him to get home before going to bed, claiming he really only needed four hours of sleep per night despite all evidence to the contrary, and Castiel had stopped fighting him on it. It was, admittedly, nice to come home to Dean rather than an empty living room.
“Dean,” Castiel said, gently shaking his shoulder. This close he could see Dean’s freckles highlighted by the flickering television light.
Dean mumbled something under his breath and turned his face further into the throw pillow.
“Your back is going to bother you if you stay here,” Castiel said, repeating a frequent complaint of Dean’s. The couch was an exceptionally comfortable large leather sectional, but it was less supportive than Dean’s beloved memory foam mattress.
“Yeah, yeah,” Dean grumbled, pushing himself to sit up. He smiled sleepily up at Castiel, and Castiel ached with how badly he wanted to reach out to run his hand through Dean’s messy hair. His longing for Dean was a constant, thrumming presence simmering under the surface of his skin, but he’d gotten used to ignoring it over the years. He settled onto the couch next to Dean.
“There’s a plate of food in the fridge for you to heat up if you’re in an eating mood tonight,” Dean said, rubbing at his eyes. The move was far more endearing than it had any reason to be. “Meatloaf and mashed potatoes with green beans. Jack had a lot of fun with the potatoes, but he wasn’t thrilled when I had to wash them out of his hair at bath time.”
Castiel’s grace had ebbed and flowed since his return, but lately it had been more ebbing than flowing which left him with human needs more and more frequently. Tonight the concept of a warm meal was incredibly appealing, “Thank you, Dean. I hope that Jack wasn’t too much trouble.”
“No problem, Cas. And you know Jack’s great,” Dean said, waving off Castiel’s concern. “You have a good night at work?”
“It was very quiet since it’s still so early in the semester. I spent most of the shift talking with Abby. Also I hope you don’t mind, but Abby asked if you’d be willing to look at her girlfriend’s car and I gave her your number. Apparently Leah has had bad experiences with mechanics overcharging her in the past and has spent the past few weeks trying to figure out how to fix the car herself based on youtube videos.”
“‘Course I don’t mind,” Dean said. “You know I take personal offense to scumbags like that.” It was true that now that Dean had a reputable profession he was incredibly outspoken about the less than honest tactics of the mechanics shop in the neighboring town.
“I appreciate it. Abby has been a good friend to me, as you know.”
“You should invite her and her girlfriend around to dinner sometime. All the knives and guns are hidden away now, this house is straight up stepford. Perfectly acceptable for hosting your coworkers.”
It wasn’t the first time that Dean had suggested this, but Castiel was always reluctant since Abby believed they were romantic partners and he knew how uncomfortable that insinuation would make Dean.
“Maybe,” Castiel said with a noncommittal shrug.
“I know I’m not exactly smart enough to keep up with you academic types, but I promise I won’t embarrass you,” Dean said. His tone was joking, but Castiel could see the insecurity clearly written on his face.
Castiel rushed to reassure him, “Dean, that’s not at all why I’m hesitant. You’re one of the most charismatic and engaging people I’ve ever met. I’m worried that I’d make things awkward, you know I’m still not great around people. I’m not even sure if she’d want to be friends outside of work.” It wasn’t a lie, just another thing that Castiel worried about.
Dean’s face relaxed back into an easy smile, “Well you won’t know unless you ask. But take your time, I’m not trying to push you into it.”
“I’ll think about it,” Castiel promised.
“Good,” Dean said, clapping Castiel on the shoulder as he stood up. “I’m gonna head to bed. See you in the morning.”
“Sweet dreams,” Castiel said, hoping that he’d have enough grace tonight to make sure of it. Soothing Dean’s nightmares was a years-old habit that it was hard to break.
“You too,” Dean called over his shoulder as he climbed the stairs.
Once he was gone, Castiel turned the television off and went to the kitchen and reheated his dinner. Even though the house was now still and silent, he didn’t feel alone in the comfortable space that he and Dean had created together.
It had surprised Castiel how Dean and Sam had managed to create a nursery out of an empty room in the utilitarian bunker the first time Dean showed him Jack’s room.
The walls had been painted a soft warm yellow, making the space seem bright without any sunlight. There were decals on the wall depicting various animals, a solid oak crib fitted with a bright yellow sheet decorated with tiny printed bees. A dresser with a changing pad on top was placed in one corner and a rocking chair beside a shaded floor lamp was in another. Spread across the floor was a fluffy white rug that had a colorful play mat and various stuffed toys on top of it.
“Dean,” Castiel had said, overwhelmed by emotion, “thank you.”
“Yeah, no problem,” Dean had replied, hovering by the door, watching Castiel gently place a sleeping Jack in the crib.
“I think I may go lie down for a while,” Castiel had said, voice low. “I’m still feeling a bit tired, my grace isn’t back to full power.”
As Castiel had moved to leave the room, he was stopped by Dean grabbing his wrist. When he’d turned back, Dean had pulled him into a tight hug. It was more desperate than the hug Dean had given him earlier as Dean’s hands clutched at Castiel’s jacket and he buried his face in the crook of Castiel’s neck.
At first Castiel had been too shocked to respond, but then he’d raised his own arms and returned the hug, holding Dean just as tightly. He’d lost himself in it, imagining what it could be like if this was something he was allowed to have, if he could always keep Dean this close.
After a long moment, Dean had pulled away. Clapping Castiel on the back he’d said, “It’s good to have you back,” and walked across the hall to his own room, leaving Castiel alone in the hallway, still reeling. His mind had raced with a chorus of maybe, maybe, maybe . But he had stopped those thoughts in their tracks. He and Dean were friends, Dean saw him as a brother. That was all it was.
Castiel had spent another few minutes watching Jack sleep peacefully before returning to his own bedroom.
Almost everything had been exactly as he’d left it. Not that that was surprising, as he’d had very few belongings that he kept to begin with. The only difference had been that the photo he usually kept on his desk, a candid of him and Dean that Charlie had sent him back when she was alive, was missing. He’d made a mental note to ask about it in the morning and kicked off his shoes before lying on the bed and falling immediately into a dreamless sleep.
When Castiel awoke the next morning to his six-thirty alarm he wished he could stay in bed just a bit longer. His grace was flitting just out of his reach today, making sleep feel more like a necessity than an indulgence. But he knew that he needed to get up so that Dean would be on time to open the garage.
Castiel went through the motions of his morning ablutions before stumbling down the stairs to the kitchen, still feeling half asleep.
“Morning, sunshine,” Dean said as soon as Castiel walked into the kitchen. The sun had barely started to rise, but the kitchen lights bathed the room in a welcoming golden glow.
“Good morning,” Castiel replied, stopping to place a kiss on top of Jack’s head before slumping into his seat at the table.
“Mostly human day today?” Dean asked as he moved to the coffee maker.
“Mm,” Castiel confirmed, feeling grateful as Dean handed him a steaming mug of coffee. “Thank you, Dean,” he said before taking his first sip. Dean gave him a soft, warm smile.
“Want some breakfast?” Dean offered, glancing at his phone to check the time, “I’ve got enough time to throw together some eggs and toast before I leave.”
Castiel thought about it for a moment, “No thank you, I don’t think I’m hungry yet.” He still wasn’t the best at reading his human needs when they arose, but Castiel often found that he didn’t want to eat first thing in the morning.
“Alright,” Dean said, settling back down across from Castiel to continue whatever he’d been reading on his phone.
A feeling of contentment settled over Castiel as he drank his coffee slowly, listening to the music Dean had playing quietly in the background and Jack’s happy sounds as he ate his breakfast of almond butter toast with sliced strawberries. It had surprised Castiel at first how easily Dean had shifted to preparing healthier food without complaint after so many years of constantly mocking Sam’s diet choices.
In fact, Dean hadn’t complained about much of anything since they’d moved here. He changed diapers, cleaned up Jack’s messes (and sometimes Castiel’s), cooked and kept up with the yardwork, all while acting there was nothing he’d rather be doing. Castiel had worried in the beginning that eventually Dean would realize he wasn’t enjoying this quiet domesticity, that he missed the fast paced life of hunting full-time. However, they’d been here almost a full year now and Dean hadn’t hinted at wanting to leave or regretting his choice once.
“Do you ever miss hunting?” Castiel wondered aloud.
“Huh?” Dean immediately looked up from his phone, brow furrowed. “No. Why would I?”
“It was your life for so long,” Castiel replied. “I would understand if you missed it.”
“Cas, you’re not trying to ask me to leave, are you?” Dean was sitting up perfectly straight, expression full of concern
“No, of course not,” Castiel rushed to clarify. “I was only wondering. I know this has been an adjustment and I wanted to be sure that you’re still happy here.”
“I am Cas,” Dean said, meeting Castiel’s eyes unwaveringly. “I don’t think I’ve been happier in my life.”
Castiel smiled, “Good. This is the happiest I’ve been as well.”
“Good,” Dean said with a nod before pushing his chair back from the table. “Now that we’ve cleared that up, I’ve gotta head out.”
After putting his breakfast dishes in the dishwasher, Dean stopped next to Jack and leaned down to kiss his strawberry-covered cheek. “You be good, kid,” he said seriously. Jack responded by giggling and trying to grab at Dean’s shirt with his sticky-looking hands. Dean dodged him easily.
“See you later, Cas,” Dean said as he headed out the backdoor.
“Have a good day at work,” Castiel replied before the door swung shut.
“So Jack,” Castiel turned to the toddler, “what would you like to do today.”
“Abla,” Jack exclaimed. Castiel smiled. At a year and a half old, Jack was starting to speak more and more, even if Dean and Castiel were the only ones usually able to decipher his babble. They’d also taught him some basic signs, which helped him communicate his needs, but Castiel wasn’t sure what the sign for bubbles was and he hadn’t had a chance to ask Eileen.
“It might be too cold outside to do bubbles today,” Castiel explained, as though it was possible to sway a determined toddler with straightforward logic, “but we can give it a try.”
It took some time to clean the remnants of breakfast off of a squirming Jack and even more time to coerce him into his winter clothes. The snow hadn’t accumulated enough to bother with snow pants when they wouldn’t be outside for long, but he managed to get Jack into his puffy blue coat with matching mittens and a bright pink hat that Castiel had knitted himself, a hobby he’d picked up because it was both a productive and relaxing way to pass time, with a giant bobble on top that Jack adored.
As Castiel had predicted, the allure of bubbles was dulled by the freezing weather and they were back inside after less time than it had taken to get Jack ready in the first place. It had, however, tired Jack out enough that he happily settled in to quietly play with his blocks while Castiel took some time to tend to the plants scattered around the ground floor.
There were many things that Castiel loved about the house, but one of the highest on his list were the large windows in the living room and kitchen that allowed him to keep a growing collection of houseplants. It had started with a single golden pothos, a housewarming gift from Eileen, and now he had close to two dozen plants. Dean liked to grumble about Castiel turning the house into a jungle, but he would still bring home any interesting looking plant he found while out shopping. It was a good hobby to keep him busy until it was warm enough to work on planting a garden in the backyard, which was his ultimate dream.
The rest of the day continued at a slow pace, both Jack and Castiel seemingly affected by the chilly gray weather outside. Castiel heated up a can of chicken noodle soup for lunch and after, when he and Jack cuddled on the couch to watch a show together, they both fell asleep.
Which is how Dean found them when he got home from work. Castiel woke to him taking a photo on his phone.
“Aren’t you the one who told me that watching people sleep is creepy?” Castiel asked dryly, keeping his voice soft so he wouldn’t wake Jack who was sprawled across his chest.
“Doesn't count when you’ve got a baby drooling on you,” Dean said, grinning. “How could I not get a picture of that? ‘S’cute.”
As Dean moved closer, Castiel could see that his cheeks were bright pink, likely from the cold, and he was still wearing his coat and the gray beanie that Castiel had knitted him.
“How was your day?” Castiel asked as Dean headed toward the coat closet.
“It was good,” Dean said as he hung up his coat. “Fred had me work on restoring this sweet old Mustang that belongs to a collector for most of the shift.”
It hadn’t taken long for Dean to secure his job at a mechanic’s shop in town. The owner, Fred, was a gruff older man who, from Dean’s stories, sounded a lot like Bobby. When Dean had proven himself to be a reliable, efficient worker, Fred had quickly offered him an assistant manager role.
“Looks like you two had a busy day,” Dean said, smirking at Jack who was still fast asleep.
“Oh yes, we went outside for a whole ten minutes to do bubbles, built and knocked over several block towers, and fell asleep during a Sesame Street rerun. It was wild,” Castiel said, which made Dean laugh.
Castiel’s answering chuckle caused Jack to stir, “Da!” He said happily, elbowing Castiel’s chin as he turned to reach for Dean.
“Hey buddy,” Dean said, scooping him up and kissing the top of his head. Jack sighed happily and cuddled into Dean’s shoulder, his eyes slipping shut again. “You should probably go get changed for work, Cas. It’s just about three-thirty.”
Cas groaned as he sat up, “It’s a very human day today.” He stretched and yawned, “I guess I’ll have to stop at the Starbucks on campus.”
“I could make some coffee while you get ready,” Dean offered.
“Thank you Dean, however I don’t believe you can make a mocha cookie frappucino.”
Dean cringed, but he laughed, Castiel’s Starbucks addiction was a well-worn topic between the two of them. “I still don’t understand how you can drink that stuff. And this is coming from someone who loves a good dessert.”
“They make me happy,” Castiel said, with a shrug.
“Well who am I to deny that,” the way Dean smiled at Castiel could only be described as fond, something that made Castiel feel warm all over. Sometimes Dean looked at him so fondly that Castiel wondered if he wasn’t actually alone in his feelings. But then Dean would clap him on the shoulder and call him buddy and the illusion would be shattered. It was something that Castiel was used to, and still something he wouldn’t trade.
Over the first few days after Castiel’s return, Dean had shown Castiel all of the intricacies of caring for an infant. Castiel had done plenty of reading about raising a child before his death, but it turned out that no amount of reading could prepare him for the reality of changing a diaper.
“Are you sure that he’s healthy?” He’d asked Dean in concern the first time that Dean had walked him through changing Jack after a bowel movement.
Dean had laughed so hard he’d doubled over while Castiel meticulously cleaned Jack off. Dean’s laughter made Jack laugh too, which in turn made it even more difficult for Castiel.
“Buddy, this isn’t even a bad one,” Dean had said once he’d composed himself. “When he was a newborn he got shit up to his neck a couple times. Still don’t know how that even happened, but my mom and Jody said it was normal when I asked them about it. Apparently babies are just gross.”
Castiel had frowned, “It truly is a miracle that the human species continues to propagate.” He had frowned even harder as he’d carefully replaced the diaper, following Dean’s exact instructions. At first he’d wondered if Dean was playing a prank when he’d told Castiel the steps to take to avoid being peed on, but now he wasn’t taking any chances.
“You really should wear more casual clothes around him,” Dean had said. “Trust me, you don’t wanna be trying to clean spit up off your favorite coat.”
“I do suppose it would be a waste of my depleted grace to use it to clean up my coat,” Castiel had said, looking down at his coat. He had grown attached to it and it would be a shame to have it stained with any sort of bodily fluids.
“Yeah, makes more sense to just wear things you can toss in the washer and not worry about. I can talk you shopping at some point if you want,” Dean had offered.
“I’d appreciate that, Dean,” Castiel had said. And he’d found himself wondering about Dean’s changed behavior.
Instead of asking Dean himself, which Castiel had known would get him nowhere, he’d tracked down Sam who was hunched over a book in the library.
“Dean has seemed different since I’ve been back,” Castiel had said carefully. “I’ve noticed he’s not drinking anymore, and he’s been… nicer.” Castiel hadn’t been sure if that was even the right way to describe it, but he also couldn’t think of a better description.
Sam had looked over with an unreadable expression on his face, “Yeah. He got rid of all the liquor in the bunker as soon as we got back here with Jack.”
“Oh,” Castiel had said quietly. He hadn’t been sure what to make of that.
“I was shocked he didn’t go through withdrawal,” Sam had continued, “but I think Jack helped with that.”
“Jack?” Castiel had replied, confused. “How?”
“Those first few weeks, he seemed to be bleeding power. Making light bulbs explode, turning appliances on at random. But I think he was also healing Dean. Jack’s been more attached to him from the beginning. He managed to start reining it in after he scared himself making a door slam shut and it hasn’t been as much of a problem since then.”
“I’m sorry I missed all of that,” Castiel had said, feeling a deep sense of grief at everything he had missed.
“Not your fault, man,” Sam had said, reaching over to pat him on the shoulder, “We’re all just glad you’re back.”
“I’m glad to be back,” Castiel had replied honestly. “Can I ask, though, why Dean stopped drinking?”
Sam had given him a look like Castiel was missing something obvious, “He did it so he could take care of Jack. He’s been really serious about doing everything right for him.”
“I never meant for this to become his responsibility,” Castiel had said with a sigh, “he didn’t have to do any of this.”
“Of course he did, Cas,” Sam had said with a bit of a scoff. “What, did you think he’d just hand Jack off after you’d died for him? As far as Dean’s concerned Jack is your family which makes him our family. There was never another choice than to raise him as well as we could in your absence.”
There hadn’t been anything Castiel could think to say to that and Sam had just huffed and gone back to his reading.
“Did you tell your coworkers I’m your husband?” Dean asked over breakfast on Saturday morning.
“What?” Castiel choked on the sip of coffee he’d just taken, feeling a creeping sense of dread. Jack laughed happily at Castiel’s coughing fit while he smashed blueberries into the table, clearly unsympathetic to the situation.
“I didn’t get a chance to tell you last night, but Leah came into the shop yesterday,” Dean explained, “nice girl by the way. But imagine my surprise when she told me how much Abby likes working with my husband. AKA you, apparently.” Fortunately Dean’s tone was teasing rather than angry. His eyes sparkled with mirth as he watched Castiel squirm under his gaze.
Castiel sighed, “I have a photo of you and Jack on my desk and Abby asked if you were my partner. I said yes because it seemed like the easiest explanation, and not completely untrue as we are partners in many ways.”
Dean’s ears turned red, “I get it. I don’t mind, Cas.”
That surprised Casiel. He’d imagined how this conversation could go many times, but he’d never imagined Dean’s easy acceptance. “I did clarify that we weren’t married, though,” he said. “She may have just forgotten to pass that information along.”
“It’s really fine,” Dean said, taking a large bite of his pancakes. He wasn’t smiling anymore as he poked at his plate of food.
“Maybe we should get married,” Castiel said without thinking. As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he froze.
It was Dean’s turn to nearly choke. He coughed for several seconds before taking a large sip of orange juice.
“I’m sorry,” he said once he caught his breath, “you want to get married?”
Castiel tried to think on his feet to find reasons that wouldn’t give away his true feelings, “It would make a lot of things easier.” He paused thoughtfully, finding a path forward, “I have much better benefits than you do and it wouldn’t cost any extra to add you to the family plan with Jack and I. Filing taxes would be easier now that we’re being upright citizens. It would help when Jack is enrolled in school, eventually. It seems like a very practical option.”
“Right. Practical,” Dean said, frowning slightly and not meeting Castiel’s eyes.
“I wouldn’t expect any of the romantic or sexual elements of marriage, of course,” Castiel clarified to reassure him. “You’d be welcome to continue to have encounters with women, though I would prefer if you did not bring them here.” It was hard to say, but Castiel didn’t want Dean to make himself miserable out of some misplaced sense of duty.
“Continue to have encounters?” Dean repeated, nonplussed, “Cas, I haven’t been with anyone like that in, well, years. Not really interested in the hit it and quit it life anymore, you know?”
“Oh,” Castiel said, looking down at his plate. He’d certainly noticed a decrease in Dean’s sexual encounters but he’d had no idea they’d stopped completely. They both sat in silence for a few minutes that was broken only by Jack’s happy babble as he ate his breakfast, unaware of the tension around him.
“You know, why not?” Dean finally said.
“What?” Castiel said, quickly looking up at Dean, feeling shocked.
“Marriage,” Dean said, “let’s do it. We’re already a family, you, me, and Jack. It’s not like I’m planning on ditching you guys someday to settle down with someone else. I’m settled here and getting to be with the two of you like this is already more than I deserve. It’s something I never thought I’d get to have and there’s no one I’d rather have it with.” Dean’s eyes looked suspiciously wet as he finished speaking and Castiel could feel himself tearing up as well.
Dean loved him, even if it wasn’t the type of love he longed for that didn’t make that love any less precious. Who was Castiel to squander that?
“I would be honored to be your husband,” Castiel said and he and Dean smiled shyly at each other until Jack took advantage of their distraction to grab for the bottle of maple syrup sitting open on the table, dumping it all over himself.
Leaving the bunker, and Sam and Dean with it, wasn’t something that Castiel had wanted. But he’d known that it was no place to raise a child. Children needed fresh air and sunlight. Space to run. A home that wasn’t littered with arcane, possibly cursed, items and enough weapons to outfit a small army. Jack had been six months old and was beginning to drag himself across the floor. It was only a matter of time until he was mobile enough to start getting into things he shouldn’t. The fact that they still didn’t know the scope of his potential powers had made the prospect feel even more urgent.
The idea of telling Dean had been especially painful. Over the previous two months Castiel had noticed a lightness in Dean that he’d never seen before that seemed to come from being around Jack. With Jack he was freer with his affection, gave comfort willingly, and wasn’t afraid to be silly if it made Jack laugh. But Dean had always made it clear that hunting was the life he’d chosen and that a family just didn’t fit into that picture.
Castiel had found Dean alone in the kitchen one evening, taking inventory of the food they had left before shopping the next day and he’d decided it was probably as good of a time as any to broach the topic.
“Can we talk for a minute?” Castiel had asked, immediately grabbing Dean’s attention with his serious tone.
Dean had looked hesitant, almost scared, as he’d said, “Yeah, sure buddy. What’s up?”
“I want to find a house,” Castiel had said carefully. “Jack should grow up someplace with windows and a yard to play in. Somewhere safe, where he has the space to live like a normal child.”
Dean had stared at him as though Castiel had reached over and slapped him, then he’d shaken himself out of it, “Yeah, uh, okay. I get it.”
“He deserves a normal childhood, Dean,” Castiel felt himself growing defensive. “Growing up somewhere that he feels stable.”
“I’m not arguing with you,” Dean had said, raking his hand through his hair. “You’re right, it is what Jack deserves. Let me know if you need any help with, you know, finding a place. Fake papers. Packing. Whatever. Anything.” Dean had paced over to the former liquor cabinet and opened it. He’d stared at the empty shelves for a moment and took a deep breath that Castiel had been able to see from across the room. One single heave of shoulders before he’d stood, unmoving.
“Dean,” Castiel hadn’t known what to say. He’d never seemed to know what to say to Dean anymore. Not that he ever really had in the first place, but it had been worse since he’d come back, more stilted. As open as Dean was around Jack, he had been equally closed off to Castiel.
Dean had turned back to him, eyes downcast, “I’m going to bed.” He’d left the room without looking at Castiel.
All Castiel had been able to do was sink into one of the chairs, propping his arms on the table to rest his head on, defeated. Sam had found him like that some time later.
“Are you okay?” Sam had asked, startling Castiel from his pensiveness.
“No,” Castiel had answered bluntly.
Pulling out a chair across from Castiel’s, Sam had asked, “Can I help?”
“I can’t seem to talk to Dean without somehow upsetting him,” Castiel had admitted. He’d felt lost, adrift at sea when all he’d desperately wanted was to be back on solid land with Dean again.
Sam had sighed wearily, “Was it anything in particular tonight?”
“I told him I wanted to find a real home to raise Jack in.”
“Shit,” Sam had said, casting his gaze toward the ceiling.
Castiel had bristled at that, “I thought you, out of everyone, would be supportive of trying to give Jack a normal childhood.”
“Of course I support that, Cas. It’s just-” He’d looked at Castiel with a pained expression, “Dean was really messed up when you died. I mean he’s messed up every time you’re dead, but this time… I don’t know what would have happened if he didn’t have Jack. He kind of hyper focused on taking care of him. He loves Jack so much. It’s going to be… hard,” Sam had grimaced, obviously understating his expectation of Dean’s reaction, “for him to lose both of you.”
“He’s not going to lose us,” Castiel had said with certainty. Imagining his life without Dean was something he had never been able to do, he hadn’t even wanted to try to imagine it. “And I’m sure that he’s been wanting to get back to hunting after several months of taking care of a baby full time.”
Sam had looked at him, a deep disappointment clear on his face, “I really thought you knew him better than that, Cas.”
When Castiel hadn’t responded, Sam had just sighed again, deep and long-suffering, and left the kitchen.
Castiel had had enough grace left then that he didn’t technically need to sleep most nights, but he’d found he enjoyed the process of allowing himself to take a break from his own thoughts for a few hours each night. It had also surprised him how lonely the bunker could feel when all of its other occupants were asleep. He’d spent centuries alone before, but it was much easier to do when there was no one he cared to spend time with. The echoing halls of the bunker had served only as a reminder that he had managed to mess up his relationship with both Dean and Sam in one night.
That night was one that had him craving the escape of sleep.
Every night since he’d been back, he would stop in Jack’s room before he went to bed. Jack seemed to be a good sleeper for a baby, though Dean and Sam had told stories of how he’d kept them up for weeks screaming all night when he’d been a newborn.
But that night, before he’d opened Jack’s door, he had been able to hear Dean already inside. His voice had been nothing more than a soft rumble through the door as he’d sang quietly, accompanied by the creak of the rocking chair, which Sam had apparently found at a nearby antique shop and Dean liked to joke was probably haunted because he enjoyed the irony.
Castiel had leaned heavily on the wall beside the door. He’d known how attached Dean was to Jack, and Jack to Dean. It had been obvious in the careful, painfully gentle way Dean handled the baby and in how much Jack lit up whenever Dean walked into a room. But Castiel had promised to keep Jack safe, and that wasn’t a promise he could keep without making some lifestyle changes.
Caught up in his thoughts, Castiel hadn’t heard Dean leaving the room until the door had opened and they were staring at each other. Dean had frozen like he’d been caught doing something wrong, his eyes had been red and glassy and Castiel had had the horrifying realization that Dean had been crying.
“Sorry, I just- I know I don’t have too much more time to spend with him and I,” Dean’s voice had cracked and he’d coughed once before forcing his face into a casual grin, “I’ll miss the little guy, you know. I’ll-” his grin had fallen as quickly as he’d plastered it on, “I’ll be able to visit him, though, right?”
“Of course,” Castiel had reassured him softly, “you will be welcome any time.”
Dean had nodded, “You got any idea where you wanna go?”
“I was thinking somewhere near Jody, Donna, and the girls maybe. It would be nice to have a support system around.”
This had caused Dean to visibly wince, before again faking a smile, one that had looked nearly grotesque in how it hadn’t come close to reaching his eyes, “That makes sense.”
He’d looked so completely miserable that Castiel had tried to cheer him up by saying, “I’m sure you’re looking forward to getting back to your normal lifestyle. I appreciate how much you’ve already given up to take care of Jack more than I can say, but I know that you’re a hunter, not a parent.”
“Yeah, sure,” Dean had finally moved to brush by Castiel, his expression stone cold as he’d marched back to his own room. Castiel had felt defeated as he checked in on Jack before heading to bed.
The next morning Castiel had been the first one up. Usually Dean would get up with Jack since Castiel often enjoyed sleeping in, but Castiel had been restless all night and had taken the first sounds of waking from Jack’s room as an excuse to get out of bed.
He had been feeding Jack his morning bottle when Sam had come into the kitchen after his morning run. As soon as he’d joined Castiel at the table with a protein drink, Dean had stormed in. His eyes had been ringed with dark circles as though he hadn’t slept at all and a scowl was etched deeply onto his face.
“I found us a hunt,” Dean had barked at Sam, ignoring Castiel and Jack completely.
“You… what,” Sam had said, a look of pure confusion on his face.
“Sounds like a shifter, twenty miles outside of Dallas. Shower and get packed, it’s already killed three people.”
Sam had sputtered for a second as he’d seemed to struggle to keep up with that was happening. “Can’t someone else handle it? I thought we were taking a break,” he’d finally said, looking pointedly at Jack.
For a second Dean’s expression had softened and Castiel had thought he’d change his mind, but then he’d made eye contact with Castiel and his shoulders had straightened, “Break’s over. People are dying and we have a job to do. I’m leaving in twenty minutes, with or without you.” He’d turned to leave, but had stopped when Jack had frantically raised his arms toward him and whined.
Dean had acquiesced, allowing Castiel to hand Jack over. Dean had held Jack close for a long moment before kissing the top of his head, placing him back in Castiel’s arms, and walking out of the room.
Unsure what to do, Castiel had looked over at Sam who was staring disbelievingly at the doorway. “For fuck’s sake,” he’d said, pushing his chair back with an angry squeak against the tile. As he’d stomped after his brother, he’d given Castiel a long look that had clearly implied that this turn of events was entirely Castiel’s fault.
It probably had been.
Once their toddler was “de-stickyfied”, Dean’s term, they brought him out to the backyard to run around while they rested on the porch, enjoying the day off. It was still very much winter, but the weather was actually above freezing for the first time all week and it was nice to get some fresh air.
“I could try to get off work early enough one afternoon this week so that we could go down to the courthouse,” Dean said as they settled into the chairs on the porch.
“Dean, your brother will kill us both if we get married without him,” Castiel pointed out.
“I know,” Dean said with a slight cringe, “but there’s a whole process to apply for the license. It’s not like the movies where you can just roll up and get married.”
“Oh,” Castiel hadn’t exactly thought that far ahead, “that’s a good idea then.”
“Sam’s going to be insufferable about this, though.” Dean took a pensive sip of the coffee he’d brought out with him, “We could just never tell him.”
“We have to tell him, Dean,” Castiel said, feeling mildly annoyed that Dean was even suggesting they keep their marriage a secret. “I’m sure it will be fine. Sam’s very understanding.”
Dean scoffed at that, “Sure he is.” But he let the subject drop, choosing to leave Castiel and the coffee behind on the porch while he chased Jack around the yard instead. Castiel wasn’t happy with Dean’s conflict avoidance, but it was hard to stay upset while he watched Jack happily laughing as Dean caught him and lifted him in the air.
They did tell Sam that afternoon during their weekly video call that was part of their Saturday routine. As soon as they’d finish dinner, Dean would pull out his laptop and they’d huddle together on the couch as they called Sam to catch up.
“You’re getting married?” Sam exclaimed when Dean told him, sounding understandably shocked. “What- How-”
Dean cut in quickly, “We just figured it’d make sense. With Jack, you know, and health insurance.”
“Health insurance?” Sam asked, a frown forming on his face.
“Yeah, Cas has way better insurance than I do,” Dean’s tone was easy but Castiel could see the tension in his shoulders. “So if we get married he can add me to his plan.”
“And that’s… the only reason?” Sam rubbed his hand across his face as though this conversation was exhausting him.
“Also taxes,” Castiel added.
“Right,” Sam laughed as though it was the least funny thing he’d ever heard. “So, you’re telling me you’re getting platonically married for insurance and taxes- you guys. I’m begging you. Just tal-” Sam was cut off by Dean slamming the laptop shut.
“Bye bye!” Jack said, waving from his perch on Cas’ lap.
“That was rude,” Castiel said, raising his eyebrows at Dean’s sudden haste to end the call.
Dean rolled his eyes, “There was a reason I voted not to tell him. I knew he wouldn’t get it.”
“Dean,” Castiel began, but before he could continue Dean’s phone started ringing.
“What?” Dean said as he answered it, visibly agitated.
“You’re such a fucking child,” Castiel could hear Sam say on the other end of the line. He sounded more tired than angry.
“Am not,” Dean said, glaring when Castiel barely stifled a laugh at the exchange.
“Dean just tell him ,” Sam said. Dean hung up on him again.
“I fucking miss flip phones,” Dean muttered, glaring at the rectangular smartphone in his hand. “Hanging up on Sam was so much more satisfying that way.”
“Is there a reason you keep hanging up on Sam?” Castiel asked calmly, trying to not let onto how curious he actually was since he was certain that Dean wouldn’t tell him.
“He’s being a shit,” Dean said, just as clearly disinterested in sharing as Castiel had expected.
“It!” Jack repeated happily.
“You’re lucky that he can’t pronounce his sibilants yet,” Castiel said evenly, giving Dean the out.
Dean slouched back against the couch, “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry."
“We don’t have to get married if you don’t want to,” Castiel said softly. “I don’t want you to feel trapped in something you agreed to in haste.”
“No, I want to Cas,” Dean said. The steady way he held Castiel’s gaze made Castiel believe him. “Sam’s just being Sam, you know. He loves getting involved in everyone’s business. Always thinks he knows what’s best.”
“I wonder where he possibly could’ve learned that from,” Castiel said with a smirk.
“Shut up,” Dean pushed at Castiel’s shoulder. “Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, I think it’s time for movie night. What do you say Jack? Movie?”
“Nemo!” Jack yelled, surprising no one. Finding Nemo had been his most requested movie for the past three months. Castiel was fairly sure it was because he enjoyed the animation in the underwater scenes. They were already planning a trip to the ocean once summer came because of how much Jack seemed drawn to the water and they’d been frequent visitors to the Chinese restaurant in town that had large tanks of fish lining the walls.
“We can watch Nemo,” Dean agreed. “Cas, you wanna get that queued up while I make some popcorn?”
“Of course,” Castiel said. Movie night was a staple after their weekly Sam call. Dean always made stovetop popcorn and the three of them would pile on the couch to watch a movie of Jack’s choice until his bedtime. Once Jack was asleep, Dean and Castiel would switch to a more adult movie. Recently, they’d been making their way through the Marvel movies since they were on the same subscription as all of Jack’s favorites and apparently Dean had missed a lot of them when they’d premiered, being busy saving the world and all. Their movie nights were some of Castiel’s favorite nights, despite the fact that superhero movies were not his favorite. He loved getting to be close to both Dean and Jack with nothing pressing to get done. It was a luxury that he didn’t take for granted after so many years of constant near-death situations.
And if Dean fell asleep on his shoulder more often than not while they sat next to each other in the dark, that was just another reason to love movie night.
It had been four days before Sam and Dean had returned to the bunker from their first hunt since Castiel had returned from the dead. Four long days with one incredibly fussy baby who had sensed both Castiel’s own morose mood and the absence of the man who’d been his primary caregiver for the first several months of his life.
When they’d returned, the brothers hadn’t been speaking. Dean had been walking with a slight limp and Sam had had a constant sullen expression accompanied by a black eye.
On top of not speaking to each other, neither Dean nor Sam had been to be speaking to Castiel. It made for an awkward dinner as they had all silently eaten the sandwiches that Castiel had thrown together with the only remaining food supplies in the fridge. Dean had been eating his single handedly, his other arm cradling Jack who had been sleeping after loudly refusing to let go of Dean ever since Dean had gotten back.
“He missed you,” Castiel had said, trying to break the tension.
Dean had pulled Jack closer to him seemingly on reflex, “I guess he’ll have to get used to that.” Dean’s tone had been gravelly, like the words were painful to say and Sam had stopped glaring at his sandwich to glare at Castiel instead.
With a sigh, Castiel had turned his attention back to his own food and thought about the things that he’d known were true. First, he was in love with Dean, had loved him for years. Second, Dean didn’t return his feelings. Dean couldn’t return his feelings. Castiel knew that Dean loved him, of course, but Dean loved him like a brother, like family. Third, Dean treated hunting as a calling. He’d told Castiel before that he knew he’d die on a hunt someday as though that was his destiny. Hunting wasn’t something Dean would readily give up.
Yet it was clear that Dean also loved Jack. He’d stepped up and acted as Jack’s father without anyone asking him to and it was a role he was well-suited to. And Castiel had found his thoughts wandering back to that one afternoon he still wished he could change, to watching Dean rake leaves in the yard of a suburban house as though there was nowhere else in the world he’d rather be.
It was that memory that had led Castiel to carefully say, “Dean, if you wanted to, you could live with Jack and I.”
“What?” Dean had said, staring blankly at him.
“Fucking finally,” Sam had muttered, taking his plate with him as he’d left the room.
“You’re not obligated, of course,” Castiel had said in case his thought was wrong, “You’ve already taken on so much of the burden raising Jack when it wasn’t something you asked for. I know how much you care about hunting, that giving it up wouldn’t be a decision you’d make lightly.”
“You- are you serious?” Dean had asked.
“Of course,” Castiel had replied, as sure of this offer as he’d ever been about anything.
“You really wouldn’t mind if I lived with you guys?”
“I’d be happy to have your company,” Castiel had said. “You’re my best friend, Dean. Jack loves you and you’ve been an excellent father to him, he deserves to have you in his life as actively as you want to be.”
“Okay,” Dean had said, “I’m in.”
Castiel had blinked, he hadn’t expected Dean to make a decision so quickly, “You can take time to think about it. The offer will stay open.”
“Cas,” Dean had stared at him seriously as Jack had nestled further into his shoulder, “I’m in.”
And that had been that.
“Dude, thank you so much for giving me your husband’s number.” Abby said on Monday morning. “Did he tell you he didn’t even charge Leah since it was such a simple fix? It was just a loose part, he even showed her how to fix it herself if it happens again.” Abby’s happiness was obvious even in the hushed tone she used when they were covering the circulation desk.
“He didn’t mention that,” Castiel said, but he wasn’t surprised. Dean didn’t often seem to realize when he went above and beyond in helping people. “And he’s not my husband… yet.”
“Wait, what? You know I call him your husband just to fuck with you ‘cause it makes you all blushy,” Castiel didn’t know that. But he could feel his face heat at the mention. “But you’re actually getting married?”
Abby’s excitement drew glares from several nearby students. “Sorry, sorry,” she whispered, smiling appeasingly at them before turning her attention back to Castiel. “Congrats, seriously that’s so exciting. When did this happen?”
“The other morning at breakfast we were talking and I just realized there was no one else I’d want to spend my life with,” Castiel felt his blush deepen. “So I asked him and he said yes. And then Jack dumped an entire bottle of maple syrup on himself, which really made the moment memorable.”
“That’s a story you can retell at his own wedding,” Abby said, laughing.
Castiel laughed too, “Dean did make sure to get a photo before we tackled cleaning him up.”
“Clearly he has good foresight,” Abby said with a decisive nod. “He definitely sounds like a keeper. I know I haven’t met him, but Leah’s certainly a fan and I trust her judgement.”
“He actually told me that I should invite the two of you to dinner,” Castiel said casually, hoping she wouldn’t find the invitation odd. He hadn’t closely considered her not wanting to be friends outside of work until he’d given that excuse to Dean, but now it was something he’d made himself concerned about. “We’ve been so busy that we haven’t made many new friends in town yet, even after a year here.”
“That would be awesome,” Abby said enthusiastically. “I’m sure Leah will want to bring something to thank Dean again for the car, do you have any baked good requests? She’s a killer baker. We always show up with a dessert or three.”
“Dean’s never met a pie he didn’t like,” Castiel said, smiling, “but we would appreciate anything you would bring.”
“Consider the pie a done deal,” Abby said, before turning her attention to the cart of returns that thy needed to organize.
Jody had helped them find the house. It was a simple two-story, three bedroom home. The previous owners had taken good care of it and kept it updated with modern appliances and fixtures while still keeping a cozy feel. The biggest selling point, though, was the large fenced-in backyard and the amount of surrounding land they would own. There was plenty of space for Jack to run and play. Space for Castiel to cultivate a garden and hopefully keep some bees. It was everything that Castiel had imagined when he’d dreamed of finding a home.
Castiel had insisted on giving Dean the master bedroom after seeing Dean’s excitement over the attached bathroom’s massive shower with a rain style showerhead. Of course Dean had argued with him, but Castiel had won when he’d pointed out that he didn’t need to sleep every night so there was no reason for him to have the nicer bedroom.
Forging the documents necessary to purchase the house had been complicated considering their circumstances. In the end, Jody had just bought the house herself and the official paper trail had them renting from her in the hopes of buying it one day.
“I can’t believe you’re officially homeowners… kind of,” Sam had said over dinner once they’d finally gotten everything settled.
“I know,” Dean had replied, “we’re gonna need to find some real fucking jobs to keep the lights on now."
“I suppose I could try to find another Gas ‘N Sip job,” Castiel had said, causing Dean to scrunch up his nose.
“What? No, Cas do you know how much things cost?” Dean had said. “We need to aim for something with actual salaries, not minimum wage. Fuckin’ capitalism.”
“I can help you fake a resume,” Sam had offered. “And maybe figure out how to falsify college records. I know Dean will be able to get a job pretty easily without that since he’s handy, but you’re probably looking at more office-type work and you usually need a degree for that.”
Castiel had nodded consideringly, “Thank you, Sam. I’m sure that with your help I’ll be able to find stable employment.” He had certainly been correct, Castiel had been hired at the library a few months later and it paid much better than the Gas ‘N Sip.
Abby and Leah came over for dinner that Saturday evening, conveniently giving Dean an excuse to cancel the weekly Sam call. Castiel had given Dean a knowing glare while Dean texted Sam about the change
“Your house is so nice, I seriously love all of the plants,” Abby said after Castiel had shown her and Leah around and they were sitting down to eat.
“Thank you,” Castiel said. “It’s been a lot of work, but I think we’re both very happy with how it’s turned out.”
Dean smiled and reached over to squeeze his hand, causing Castiel to freeze until he remembered that Abby and Leah thought they were an actual couple. Dean was just playing his role in that.
“Building a home together has definitely been worth all of the sleepless nights and trips to Home Depot,” Dean said with a smile. “Do the two of you live together?”
“We actually moved into a new place pretty recently,” Leah said. “It’s this lovely old farmhouse, a little rundown but we’ve been doing a lot of weekend projects to get it back in shape.”
“It really is great,” Abby said, “Leah’s convinced it’s haunted though.” She nudged Leah’s arm with a playful smirk.
Leah blushed slightly, “It’s just… odd things seem to happen sometimes. I’ll leave a room and swear I turned the light off but then it’ll be on when I pass by again. There have been a couple times where I’ll be working with something, a paint brush or pencil, and put it down and then it’s just gone and I’ll find it across the room. It also gets really cold all randomly, it gives me the literal chills,” Leah looked down at her plate. “And of course it only happens at night when I’m by myself and Abby’s working.” She seemed to shake herself out of her thoughts, “I’m sure it’s nothing, though. Probably some wires that need replacing, old insulation, and absentmindedness.”
Abby reached her arm around Leah’s shoulder comfortingly as Castiel exchanged a significant look with Dean.
“Ghosts aren’t real, babe,” Abby said softly. “We’ll get everything sorted out soon. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable in your own home.”
Dean cleared his throat and said, “I worked construction for a while when I was younger. I’d be more than happy to take a look at things for you, see if I can spot any trouble.”
“Seriously? We’d appreciate that so much.” Abby said, her thumb still moving reassuringly against Leah’s arm.
“Of course,” Dean said with one of his most charming smiles, “name a day and we’ll be there.”
Moving out of the bunker had been a less complicated process than Castiel had expected.
It had been a quiet concern of his that Dean might change his mind when confronted with the reality of moving away from Sam. That fear never came to pass, though. There were several times when Castiel had come across the brothers having a hushed, serious discussion, but those discussions had never led to Dean backing out of his promise.
Dean had thrown himself into packing and preparing, helping Sam catalogue some of the items in the bunker that he’d come across while boxing up his own limited belongings.
The bunker wasn’t going to only hold Sam for long. He’d begun contacting other hunters with the help of Mary, Eileen, and Garth and they had been planning to make the bunker a resource for the larger hunting community. The bunker had so much potential with all of the knowledge it held as well as the amount of space it offered for any hunters who needed a place to lay low or recuperate, using it to its fullest only made sense.
Castiel had been able to tell that Dean was proud of his younger brother and that he’d at some point realized that it was finally time for the two to lead their own separate lives.
On the day of the move, they’d created a bizarre caravan heading north from the bunker to South Dakota. Sam had followed the Impala in a rented U-Haul that was mostly filled with Jack’s nursery furniture while Eileen had been kind enough to agree to drive Castiel’s truck so that Castiel himself could keep Jack company in the backseat of the Impala during the long drive. Dean and Castiel had very few of their own belongings coming with them since they’d decided it would be easier to furnish their own rooms and the rest of the housr from stores closer to their new home.
To the average person their home looked perfectly normal, but they had put plenty of precautions in place to prevent any kind of supernatural interference. In the end, Castiel had found himself glad that they hadn’t yet had any furniture to worry about as they’d warded the house as much as they possibly could.
“Well,” Dean had said, sitting back on his heels after laying out a welcome mat that they’d bought specifically to have a devil’s trap drawn on the underside, “home sweet home, Cas.”
“Yes,” Castiel had responded from where he was carefully painting warding onto the living room walls with paint that could only be seen under a blacklight. “Home sweet home.”
Claire and Kaia were staying with Jody the weekend of the luncheon-slash-ghost hunt at Abby and Leah’s and they were more than happy to babysit Jack. Claire especially had bonded with Jack over the past year and she rarely missed an opportunity to spend time with him.
“I wish I could be a fly on the wall of this lunch,” Claire had said as they were getting ready to leave. “I’d love to see you two trying to act like normal people.”
Castiel hadn’t been nearly as offended as Dean was at that. He knew his track record for being what most humans considered normal wasn’t great.
“I’m sure we’ll be just fine,” Castiel had replied, hoping to talk Dean down from the fit of huffiness he’d been clearly working up to. “Dean is very charming and more than capable of smoothing over any awkward moments.”
That had just made Dean blush and Claire roll her eyes before practically shoving them out of the house.
“Thank you so much for having us over, it’s a beautiful home,” Castiel said as Abby invited them inside. It really was beautiful, aside from the clear ghostly presence that the remnants of his grace could sense the moment he stepped through the doorway.
“There is definitely a spirit here,” Castiel muttered in Dean’s ear as Abby led them back toward the kitchen. “It doesn’t feel outwardly malevolent, however.”
“That’s a relief, should buy us some time to do some research so we can plan a salt and burn,” Dean replied, voice pitched low. Castiel nodded in agreement.
“So,” Dean asked loudly enough that his voice carried across the kitchen, “should Cas and I start looking around now, or should we wait until after lunch?”
“I can show you around a bit while Leah finishes getting lunch together,” Abby said. “Should we start in the basement? It’s not at all finished, but a lot of the electrical crap is down there.”
“Basement’s good. I can take a look at that electrical crap first,” Dean replied, following her toward the set of stairs that led downward.
The basement was unremarkable. A packers dirt floor with brick walls and only a single lightbulb that flickered overhead.
Abby was in the middle of pointing out the fuse box when Leah called from upstairs asking for a hand with setting the table.
“You guys’ll be fine poking around down here, yeah?” Abby asked as she headed back to the stairs.
“We will be,” Castiel responded with a smile. As soon as she was gone, Castiel slowly walked the perimeter of the basement until he found a spot where the energy he could sense felt strongest.
“What’s up, Cas?” Dean asked from where he’d been noting legitimate electrical and structural concerns as Castiel went still and focused.
“The spirit is nearby. I can sense it. I think it might be weak enough that I can send it on its way with my grace,” Castiel tilted his head and closed his eyes as he tried to get a better sense of the spirit.
“You sure you’re feeling up to that?” Dean’s tone was skeptical. “It’s gonna be real awkward if I have to drag you out of here.”
“I’m fairly sure. I think she’s ready to move on and my grace feels fairly strong today,” Castiel replied.
To the spirit he said, “You can show yourself. We’re here to help you.”
The translucent figure of a woman wearing a long dress materialized in front of him. He could feel Dean move closer, hovering just behind Castiel’s shoulder.
“I’ve been stuck here for over a century,” she said softly. “People have come and people have gone, but never once has anyone noticed that I’m trapped here.”
“I’m very sorry,” Castiel said. “That must have been hard.”
“I’ve tried to get their attention,” she continued sadly, “but never to any avail. How did you know that I was here?”
“I’m an angel of the lord,” Castiel replied. “I have the power to sense spirits who have become trapped. I believe I may be able to help you continue to the other side, if that is what you would like.”
“Yes, please,” she said desperately. “I’m so tired.”
Castiel nodded seriously, “Okay. I’m going to channel my grace to send your spirit on to where it belongs.”
“Thank you,” she said, “thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” Castiel took a deep breath and concentrated on pulling his latent grace to the surface. Once he could feel the power thrumming beneath his skin, he reached his hand out to cover the top of her head. It took only a moment and a brief flash of light for her to disappear. Castiel stumbled backward as his grace flared and faded and Dean reached out to steady him, wrapping an arm around Castiel’s waist.
“Easy there,” Dean said. “You alright?"
Before he could respond someone said, “What the fuck was that?”
Castiel turned and saw Abby and Leah standing at the base of the stairs, staring at the spot where the ghost had vanished and clutching each others hands.
“We- uh, we can explain…” Dean started, but Castiel held up a hand to stop him.
“It was a ghost,” Castiel answered, deciding that the truth would be the best approach. “It’s gone now, though. You won’t be bothered again.”
“You’re telling me this house was actually haunted and you exorcised the ghost?” Abby asked, sounding stressed.
“It wasn’t an exorcism so much as helping her move on,” Castiel explained, still leaning heavily against Dean. “I don’t believe she ever meant you any harm, she was just stuck here and now her soul is at peace in heaven.”
Dean cleared his throat awkwardly, “We can leave if you want. I’ve gotten a decent list of non-ghost issues that I found that you should get fixed and I can leave that for you.”
“I think I’d like more explanation,” Leah said, her face pale. “How did you… do that?”
“We used to be ghost hunters, before Jack,” Dean said, “When you mentioned your problems with the house we thought we’d check it out and that we’d be able to deal with it without you noticing.”
“I’m sorry, what?” Abby said, crossing her arms and glaring disbelievingly at them.
“Maybe we could have this conversation sitting down?” Castiel asked, leaning more heavily against Dean as he began to feel faint.
“Okay,” Abby said with a tight nod. “We can talk in the living room,” she let Leah the stairs first before following. Dean and Castiel were close behind.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Dean asked quietly.
“I’m fine, Dean,” Castiel said and Dean’s arm slipped away from his waist as they sat on the couch. “I should probably eat something and get some rest, but I’ll be fine.”
“Okay,” Dean said, still sounding worried.
“So,” Abby said as she and Leah settled onto the opposite couch, “what the fuck? Ghosts are real?”
“Yes,” Castiel said, “they are.”
“And you guys hunted them?”
“Among other things, yes.” Castiel said, slouching forward to rest his arms on his knees.
“Other things?” Leah asked quietly.
“Look, you don’t have to worry about it, you’re perfectly safe here now,” Dean said appeasingly.
“How did you even get into this kind of stuff?” Abby asked. Castiel decided to let Dean do the talking as he could feel the room starting to spin.
“My dad was a hunter, raised my brother and I in the life,” Dean said. “Cas had a… similar experience. We actually met on the job. He pulled me out of a rough spot a decade or so ago and we started working together.”
“But you don’t do it anymore?” Abby asked, her voice was starting to sound fuzzy.
“No. We stick to our actual day jobs these days. We want Jack to have a normal life, you know? We both had shitty dads, but we’re breaking the cycle and all that.”
Dean’s voice started to sound farther away and Castiel could barely make out Abby’s response as he collapsed backward into the couch.
“Cas,” Dean said, grabbing his shoulder. “Fuck, I thought you said you’d be fine.”
“‘M fine,” Castiel argued, feeling woozy as he tried to focus again.
“Is he okay?” Abby asked, sounding concerned.
“Yeah, it just took a lot of energy out of him to take care of the ghost,” Dean said, though Castiel knew him too well to buy the casual tone he was putting on. “I’ll drag him home to sleep it off.”
“Alright,” Abby said, still sounding upset. “Look, maybe we could all try having lunch again some other time. Sans ghost hunting.”
“I’d like that,” Castiel muttered as Dean hauled him off the couch.
“Sure thing,” Dean said. “It seemed like it was gonna be a nice time up until the ghost shit.”
Castiel allowed Dean to practically carry him out of the house to the Impala.
“Well that could’ve gone worse I guess,” Dean said as he helped Castiel into the car.
“How?” Castiel asked as Dean climbed behind the wheel.
“Ghost could’ve been vengeful. Someone could’ve gotten seriously hurt. I’m counting that as a win.”
“Mm,” Castiel hummed in agreement as his eyes slipped shut and he rested his head against the window, allowing the familiar hum of the Impala to lull him to sleep.
At first, Castiel hadn’t known what to expect living with Dean. His fears had turned out to be unnecessary, he’d realized, as they had quickly fallen into an easy routine.
They’d spent the first two months tip-toeing around each other. Despite having known each other for over a decade, they hadn’t ever spent so much time alone together. And adding a baby to the mix had just thrown things off further. It had led to them being overly formal, unable to completely relax around each other.
The tension between them had finally broken one morning two months in when Castiel had been the first person in the kitchen. He hadn’t slept the night before and was ready to start his day before Jack and Dean had woken.
He’d been in the middle of figuring out how to work the coffee maker since Dean had always had it running before him. When Dean had cleared his throat from the doorway, it had caused Castiel to startle, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been touching that.”
“Cas,” Dean had said, “you don’t have to apologize. This is your home too, you’re welcome to anything here.” He’d rubbed at the back of his neck after that, face slightly flushed from sleep. “Here, I can show you how to use it.”
That conversation had somehow settled something between them and they had both been more relaxed after.
Castiel had felt a near constant sense of warmth since then knowing that this was his home, his family. That he’d managed to find something for himself in spite of what had felt like the entire universe working against him. Instead of living a life constantly moving, constantly at risk, he’d found a place where he could stay, where he was safe.
The easy domesticity that had followed had Castiel in a near-constant state of longing for something he couldn’t have. But having Dean here at all was more than he’d ever expected to have and he wasn’t going to risk pushing him away.
The life that he and Dean had built together was more than enough.
“What happened to him?” Claire asked in alarm as Dean helped Castiel into the house.
“Oh, he decided to use his grace to help a spirit cross over, even though I told him it would be embarrassing if I had to carry him out of his coworkers house,” Dean’s words had a playful tone of annoyance that Castiel suspected was covering up his lingering concern.
“That tracks,” Claire replied as Dean deposited Castiel on the couch.
“And his coworker and her girlfriend saw it happen so they’re super freaked out. It was really just a banner lunch.”
“Honestly, it’s shocking that you two have managed suburbia this long without any major supernatural incidents,” Claire said with a snicker.
Kaia laughed too as she brought Jack into the room, “I take it lunch went well.”
“Pa,” Jack cried, seeing Castiel on the couch. He ran over as quickly as his tiny legs would carry him and climbed on top of Castiel. “Pa,” he said again, carefully patting Castiel’s face.
Castiel could feel the warmth of Jack’s grace recharging his own.
“Thank you Jack,” he said softly, stroking Jack’s soft curls.
“What’s he doing?” Dean asked, sounding worried again.
“I believe he’s recharging my grace,” Castiel said as Jack’s chubby little hands continued to pet his face. “Like a battery.”
“He can do that?” Claire asked, sounding surprised.
“Apparently so. I already feel much stronger,” Castiel replied, wrapping an arm around Jack so that he could pull them into a sitting position.
“Well,” Dean said, slumping onto the other end of the couch. “Now that we have one less thing to worry about, does anyone feel like pizza? I’m starving.”
Their very late lunch extended well into the evening when they sat around catching up with Claire and Kaia for hours. It led to Castiel having to put a cranky, overstimulated Jack to bed early before collapsing back onto the couch next to Dean.
“I’m sorry about today,” Castiel said quietly.
“Sorry? What for?”
“I overextended myself, just as you warned me not to, and you ended up having to carry me home, just like you didn’t want to,” Castiel sighed. “I was trying my best to be useful, I’m still adjusting to only having limited amounts of grace.”
“Cas, you know you don’t have to be useful to me, right?” Dean turned to look at him, “I don’t give a rat’s ass about how much grace you have left as long as you’re safe and healthy. I just worry about you trying so hard to prove yourself that you end up getting hurt.”
“Oh,” Castiel hadn’t realized that and it pleased him to hear. “I’m sorry for assuming.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Dean said with a shrug. “I should’ve made it clearer. I just want you around, Cas. Angel, human, doesn’t matter.”
“That is good to know,” Castiel said, feeling a blush creep across his cheeks. “Thank you, Dean.”
They were quiet for a few moments before Dean asked, “Do you ever think about the type of woman you’d have ended up with if, you know, you’d had a more normal life?”
Castiel’s brain screeched to a halt at the complete non-sequitur, “What?”
“You know,” Dean said, as though he was making any sense, “if things were normal and you weren’t a former angel who ended up with a magical kid and a washed up ex-hunter, is that something you’d’ve wanted?”
“I’m not sure what gave you the idea that I would only want to be with a woman, or that I view our life together as abnormal,” Castiel replied, still feeling lost. He could understand where Dean had drawn assumptions as he thought back to Meg, April, Nora, Daphne, but none of those encounters had actually meant anything to him. Not the way Dean did, though Dean didn’t know that and Castiel had expressly avoided saying or doing anything that would lead to him finding out.
“I just don’t get it, why are you marrying me?” Dean asked, sounding as confused as Castiel felt. “You could do a hell of a lot better, maybe even find someone you actually want to, you know, be with be with.”
Castiel narrowed his eyes as he looked over at Dean, “I feel obligated to point out that I could ask you the same question, especially since you have even more of a history of seeking out relationships with women.”
At that, Dean just sputtered, seemingly unable to pull together a retort.
“There is no other human on earth who I would rather be with,” Castiel said, wishing that Dean would believe him. “I choose you in whatever capacity you’ll have me, every time.”
Dean scoffed disbelievingly at that, “Right.”
“I don’t understand,” Castiel could feel frustration coiling in his stomach, “why does that upset you?”
“Because it’s not true,” Dean replied insistently. Silence lingered between them as Castiel waited to see if Dean would continue to explain.
When Dean stubbornly remained silent, Castiel sighed and asked, “Why would I lie to you about that? Dean, we live together. We’re raising a child together. We’ve fought beside each other and sacrificed for each other. I rebelled against heaven because you asked me to. I asked you to marry me. There is nothing you could ask of me that I’d deny you.”
Castiel looked over at Dean’s face, his beautiful, familiar face and finally admitted, “I love you, Dean.”
Dean stared at him blankly for long enough that Castiel began to panic, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I just thought that you should know the truth.”
As he tried to get up and walk away, Dean suddenly grabbed his shoulder.
“Cas,” Dean’s voice was rough, and his eyes flew across Castiel’s face, as though he was looking for any sign Castiel was lying to him. Castiel had no idea what expression he was making, couldn’t have controlled it in that moment if he tried, but he knew that Dean would find nothing but honesty there.
After an incredibly long moment where the two of them sat, frozen, staring at each other, Dean leaned forward and kissed him.
The kiss was brief, just a quick press of lips to lips but it seemed to steady something in Dean. When he pulled away, he met Castiel’s eyes and said, “Me too, Cas. I- me too.”
Castiel reached his hand out to cup Dean’s cheek, pulling him back in. Dean’s lips parted easily under his own and Dean melted against him as though he’d been longing for this just as much as Castiel had been.
It wasn’t a kiss like Castiel had seen in the movies when one character confessed their love for another. There were awkward moments, teeth bumping against each other, noses getting in the way of certain angles. But that made it all better because it was real .
Castiel was surprised by how quickly Dean let him take the lead, as one kiss turned to more, and more, and more, allowing Castiel to set the pace instead of Dean showing his usual need for control as Castiel climbed into his lap.
“Fuck,” Dean said hoarsely as Castiel broke away to kiss down the column of his neck. His hands clutched desperately at Castiel’s waist. Castiel could feel that Dean was already hard as their hips ground together.
“Is this okay?” Castiel stopped to ask.
“Yes. Shit, yes, it’s so okay.” Dean gasped as Castiel kissed the spot where his jaw met his neck. “I just- should we maybe take this upstairs?”
“That is an excellent idea,” Castiel said, climbing off of Dean before extending a hand to pull Dean up after him.
They got a bit distracted in the hallway when Dean allowed Castiel to back him against the wall and kiss him for a few minutes more. Castiel just couldn’t seem to stop now that it was something he had permission to do.
Eventually, though, they did make it to Dean’s room and his large king-sized bed.
Later, when they were curled together in Dean’s bed, Dean spoke quietly into the darkness, “I read in my dad’s journal that for the year after Mom died I didn’t speak. I guess I’ve never been good with words, but especially after something tragic, you know? I’m sorry I didn’t say anything sooner. I was just scared. I didn’t want to lose you or Jack. Not when I was so close to having everything I’d ever wanted. I tried, though, to show you.”
And oh. Castiel thought about the carefully prepared meals. The way Dean took care of needs before Castiel himself knew they were there. His car scraped clean of snow after a winter storm. Dozens, possibly hundreds, of perfectly prepared mugs of coffee or tea being handed to him. Packets of seeds left on the counter after a trip to the hardware store. Coming home at night to Dean waiting on the couch until he was sure that Castiel was home safe. The evidence of Dean’s love had been surrounding him and he hadn’t even noticed.
“Oh, Dean,” Castiel said, slipping his fingers through Dean’s, “I’m sorry I never realized…”
He could feel Dean’s shrug in the way the blankets shifted, “‘S’okay. We both figured it out in the end.”
It was true, but Castiel still felt a deep sense of regret when he thought about how much time they’d wasted.
“How long have you felt this way?” Dean asked, his thumb gently stroking Castiel’s.
“I don’t know,” Castiel answered honestly. “Sometimes I think my love for you has always been there, burning quietly in the background. It took me a while to figure out exactly what the feeling was, though. That was a more recent revelation over the past few years.”
“I’ve known for a while, even though I wasn’t ready to admit it. When you- when you died,” Dean’s voice cracked and Castiel pulled him closer until Dean’s head was resting on his chest. “When you died it was like a piece of me died with you.” Castiel carded his fingers gently through Dean’s hair, trying to soothe the hurt he obviously still felt. “I poured everything into taking care of Jack, but I just… I missed you so fucking much. If it weren’t for Jack I’m afraid of what I might have done.” Dean’s arms wrapped around Castiel tightly, as if he was proving to himself that Castiel was really there.
“Dean,” Castiel said, his stomach sinking at Dean’s words as his free arm wound around Dean, hand settling on Dean’s lower back. “I’m sorry. I hope that you know now that I would never willingly leave you.”
“I’m sorry too, Cas. For all of the times I pushed you away. I was such a dick to you sometimes… I’m not sure why you want me at all,” Dean said morosely.
“I haven’t been perfect either, Dean,” Castiel said. It was still hard sometimes to think about the myriad mistakes he’d made over the years that they’d known each other. “But we’ve made amends and moved forward. We’ve built a life together and that’s all I ever wanted.” He tilted his head down to press a kiss to Dean’s hair.
“Yeah, I want that too Cas. I really do,” Dean said as he snuggled somehow closer.
“Good,” Castiel replied. “Now we should probably get to sleep given Jack’s habit of waking up before dawn.”
Dean chuckled, “Yeah I guess we should. Night, Cas.”
“Sweet dreams, Dean. I love you,” Castiel felt a sense of giddiness in being able to finally say those words as freely as he wanted.
“Love you too,” Dean replied, and hearing that, loving Dean and being loved in return, was what made Castiel realize that this was truly the happiest he’d ever felt.
After a minute of nothing but quiet breathing between them Dean muttered, “Sam is going to be so smug about this,” but he didn’t sound the least bit annoyed.
“We could just never tell him,” Castiel echoed Dean’s own words teasingly.
“Shut up and go to sleep,” Dean said, reaching up to ruffle Castiel’s hair.
The wedding was simple. Neither Castiel nor Dean had felt an urge to have a lavish celebration. They’d easily agreed that all they wanted was to spend time with their friends and family while eating good food and maybe dancing. The dancing part was something that Castiel had had to talk Dean around to, but Dean had finally agreed that dancing appeared to be an expected part of a wedding party.
As soon as the spring weather rolled in, they chose a weekend and decorated the backyard for the occasion.
All of Castiel’s carefully planted tulip bulbs were now sprouting out of the soil, creating a riot of color in the flower beds surrounding the deck. He hadn’t yet had a chance to begin planting a full garden, choosing to hold off until they weren’t trying to fit a rented dance floor in the yard.
They kept the ceremony itself simple. Jody had become ordained at some point in her career and she’d agreed to officiate for them. After some discussion, they’d decided to stick with standard vows since Dean felt uncomfortable getting too emotional in front of other people and Castiel didn’t need to declare his love for anyone other than Dean.
After the short wedding ceremony, the reception quickly reached full swing, becoming raucous despite the small guest list. Castiel wasn’t used to being the center of attention and soon found himself not hiding but taking a break on the raised deck behind the house where he could watch the party without having to participate.
“I was wondering where you’d wandered off to,” Dean said when he found Castiel there a few minutes later. He pulled Castiel into a hug from behind, planting a kiss on his cheek. “I was worried you were getting some belated cold feet,” Dean said jokingly. His voice so close to Castiel’s ear made Castiel shiver.
Castiel leaned back against him, “I’d never.”
“You know, I always thought this was something I’d never get to have,” Dean admitted as they watched their guests mingle and dance from their place on the deck. “I always thought that having a family would mean giving up hunting completely and I knew I could never totally cut off that part of my life. But I never imagined this.”
Dean rested his temple against Castiel’s, “Married to an angel and raising a half-angel kid with a bunch of friends who know who I really am and accept me anyhow. I didn’t think it was possible without always hiding a part of myself. Hell, several parts of myself. I never thought I’d be able to be with a man, my dad would die all over again if he was around to see this,” Dean laughed, but it was a dry, pained thing.
Castiel reached up to stroke the side of Dean’s face and Dean leaned into the touch with a sigh. “Most of all, though, I never thought you’d love me the same way I love you.” Dean’s tone was shy and he let his forehead drop to rest against Castiel’s shoulder. Castiel took a few moments to consider everything Dean had said. It was still a rare event for Dean to speak so freely about his feelings and Castiel knew how precious it was that Dean trusted him enough to share his past fears.
“I never imagined I’d have this either,” Castiel replied. He wanted to turn to face Dean, but he understood that it was often easier for Dean to discuss these things without having to make eye contact. “I spent millennia mostly alone, watching the world evolve, thinking that was the only existence I’d ever know. Watching but never participating. But you changed me, Dean. Your trust, and care, and love. I’m thankful every day that I was the one who pulled you out of hell.”
Dean lifted his head from Castiel’s shoulder to place a kiss against Castiel’s neck and Castiel melted under his easy affection, “The sense of grief I feel when I consider that I could have missed this chance, this life, it overwhelms me sometimes.”
“For so long it was just me and Sam against the world.” Dean said and Castiel could feel him shift to look straight across the yard. Castiel looked over to where Sam was dancing with Eileen, laughing as she tried to dip him, certain that Dean was watching too. “And I realize now how unhealthy that was. We’re both doing so much better now that we’re not living in each other’s pockets and constantly sacrificing ourselves for each other. It’s kinda funny actually that he found a place for himself and is thriving in the life he always tried to escape from while I’m the one married with a kid,” Dean laughed, his breath tickling the shell of Castiel’s ear. “Never saw that one coming.”
“It suits you both, these lives, I think,” Castiel said. “It truly is breaking a cycle. No more dying, no more deals with cosmic entities. A chance to just live the lives you both deserve.” There was beauty in that, Castiel thought.
They stood quietly as they watched the party playing out below them. Mary was twirling Jack around, making him shriek with laughter. Claire and Kaia had hit it off with Abby and Leah, who had come around to the realization that ghosts were real after further interrogating Castiel and Dean over another dinner. The four of them were gathered around the food table, Claire’s hands flying wildly as she told a story that had the other three doubled over in laughter. Jody and Donna were on the dance floor with the rest of their girls as well as Garth and Bess.
It was a small group, but Castiel felt proud as he looked around at all of the people they had gathered around them. It hadn’t been an easy road to get here, but it was incredibly fulfilling being surrounded by all of the people they cared about.
“Hey,” Jody called up to them when she caught them watching from the deck, “you guys are missing your own party.” That was enough to break their contemplative spell and they allowed the heckling that spread through the rest of the guests to draw them back into the fold.
It was a fantastic party in the end. The food was fantastic, even Dean admitted that getting catering was the right choice, and everyone talked and danced until the sun had long gone down and the fairy lights they’d strung around the yard were the only thing lighting the yard.
At some point Sam gave a speech that made everyone cry, especially himself. And Jack had charmed everyone in attendance with his enthusiastic dance moves.
Once everyone had left and an exhausted Jack was tucked away in bed, they made their way to Dean’s room. Which was now also Castiel’s room, though the thrill of being welcomed into Dean’s bed every night hadn’t faded yet and Castiel wondered if it ever would.
As they got ready for bed, he and Dean didn’t speak. They’d already said everything they needed to. Instead they went through their nightly routine in comfortable silence, occasionally stopping to share a kiss when they crossed paths, though they were both in agreement that they were too tired from the day’s festivities to do anything more than kissing.
When they climbed into bed Castiel spooned himself against Dean’s back, taking comfort in the warm weight of Dean in his arms.
“Sweet dreams Dean. I love you,” He said as he did every night before pressing a soft kiss to the back of Dean’s neck.
“Love you too, Cas,” Dean said with a happy sigh.
Laying in the dark, Castiel listened to Dean’s breathing deepen as he fell asleep. As Castiel allowed his own eyes to slip shut, he felt overwhelmingly lucky that his life had led him here.