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Three days have passed since the fall of Doflamingo.
Law wakes up to the gentle breeze whirring across the flower field situated just a little bit outside the kingdom of Dressrosa. The silence amidst the house and the minimal light slipping through the gaps of the curtains tells him that it’s still way too early to start his day. Law needs all the rest that his body can get considering that he’s still fatigued from pushing himself past his limits during his fight with Doflamingo, but sleep has never been a good companion for the past thirteen years and Law doesn’t expect it to be one right now.
“Torao…”
Luffy mumbles in his sleep and that’s all the cue that Law needs for him to start his day. Despite the exhaustion still adamant and evident against Law’s body, the Surgeon immediately heads to Luffy’s side and checks his vitals. When he deduces nothing is unusual, he then proceeds to check Luffy’s external injuries to make sure that none of them are going to have any infections or long-lasting repercussions.
It only takes Law ten more minutes to change the bandages across the younger captain’s torso (which Law considers as a tiny achievement considering that Luffy keeps on pulling him close and trying to drape his arms all over Law’s body) before he finally feels satisfied with his work and walks towards the small kitchen to have a cup of coffee.
Law is halfway through his cup when his clipboard sitting on top of the table grabs his attention. Several blank pieces of paper are still clipped on it and Law heaves a sigh as he remembers the one thing that he’s been trying to put off ever since he regained consciousness after the fight with Doflamingo. Law starts tapping his feet unconsciously on the floor, thinking about whether or not he should finally get on to doing it despite not having any idea as to where and how to even start.
After all, how long has it been since he last wrote a letter to Cora-san?
Groaning with his own indecisiveness, Law finally empties his cup before he goes to grab his clipboard along with the pen lying around the table. The Surgeon silently slips himself outside the house in hopes of finding the courage that he needs to start talking to Cora-san once again.
An amiable chill welcomes Law as soon as he steps out. The Surgeon immediately heads to the side of the house where he can see the sun slowly gracing the ruined yet renewed kingdom of its presence. He plops down on the ground with his legs crossed against each other, leaning against the bricked wall as he places the clipboard on his lap and gazes at the view in front of him.
Law takes a moment to stare at the miscellany of colors scattered all across the field. He takes a moment to appreciate the hue of rose-pink, orange, and yellow starting to fill up the vast expanse of the sky. He takes a moment to feel the tepid temperature as dawn finally approaches. He takes a moment to listen to the small amount of noise filled by chatters and laughter from the citizens of Dressrosa as the wind carries it and sails through the flower field.
The scenery in front of him almost makes it easy to forget about the fact that the kingdom is now nothing but a bunch of rubbles, a place filled with ruins of what used to be a coterie of beautiful community.
Law takes a deep breath, trying to drown himself in the odd solace that comes along this small moment of solitude. After what seems like an eternity of trying to find the courage to talk to his father, he finally grabs the pen and starts with the few words which never cease to make him feel the calm.
‘Hi, Cora-san.’
Law can’t help but smile a little as he imagines the goofy man already tearing up from just that one little greeting. He shakes his head at the image forming on his mind before he continues.
‘I’m sorry I haven’t written in so long, but I have some good news for you. You probably know it by now anyways, but I suppose it would be good to actually hear it from me, too.
Three days ago, I’ve finally been freed from the strings.’
Law feels his fingers almost tremble as soon as he writes the word free. Even after all the aftermath and proof of their victory, it still feels so surreal. Everything still feels so unreal. There’s a small part of him that is still preparing for Doflamingo to come back and tear him apart once again. A part of him which still feels caged with the thoughts of strings and revenge and blood and death.
Because for the longest time, Law has only ever considered death as his own form of freedom.
Clenching his fist against the pen, Law tries to ground himself and stop the trembling before he lets his thoughts gush out. He tells Cora-san about the past six months—about his initial plans, the things that he did to pry any information about Doflamingo and his underground network, about his position as a Shichibukai, and about that one time when he proudly managed to attend a Shichibukai meeting without burning the whole marine base down.
And then he tells him about how his plans have been perfectly ruined by the very person which he saved two years ago out of a simple whim.
‘Do you remember the guy I told you about two years ago? I managed to meet him again, Cora-san.
Or rather, he just barged into my life with no warnings and started to ruin all of my plans.’
Law then tells Cora-san about Punk Hazard—about how everything started to go down the drain as soon as Luffy and his crew were already involved, about how reckless Luffy was, about all the idiotic ideas which Luffy never ceased to come up with, and all about the eccentricity of allying himself with one Monkey D. Luffy.
‘He is one of the most selfish people that I’ve ever met, and that’s saying a lot considering my time in the Family. He always rushes in and always does things at his own pace! He’s so loud and obnoxious that I’m pretty sure you can hear his laughter even from a mile away. He doesn’t care about personal space and just keeps on hanging himself around me even when I’m trying so hard to ignore him. He has such a huge appetite that I’m sure his instincts are pretty much driven by meat. And mind this Cora-san, he has no manners when it comes to eating as well! None. At All!
He is so annoying!’
Law heaves out another sigh as the thoughts of his allied captain start to fulminate across his mind. Just how many sighs does Law have to let out in a day whenever Luffy is involved?
‘He is so annoying, but…’
And then Law tells Cora-san about Dressrosa—about the time when Luffy refused to leave without Law, when Luffy selfishly carried him all throughout the kingdom just so they could beat Doflamingo together (as if hearing the silent plea from the thirteen-year-old kid filled with white spots all across his body), when they fought together with an unexpected and chaotic harmony, when Luffy screamed in rage as he thought about the possibility of the Surgeon’s death as if Law’s life was not just a measly speck compared to the weight of Luffy’s dreams.
Law tells Cora-san about the time when Luffy continued the battle that Law had been trying to fight all alone for the past thirteen years.
‘I was prepared to die if it meant that Doflamingo would finally fall, but that idiot just wouldn’t let me.’
He finally tells Cora-san about the aftermath of the fight—about how the marines gave them credit for saving the country, about the smiles he kept on receiving from the citizens, and about all the grateful messages that kept on being thrown at him even when he had zero intention of saving the country from the very beginning.
‘Have you ever heard of a pirate being thanked by the civilians? Or a pirate being recognized as a savior by a King? Apparently, it’s a thing when you’re with Mugiwara-ya.’
Law tries to write as much details as he can, trying to describe a picture as vivid as he can. After all, he knows that Cora-san likes to read about the details especially when it entails the welfare of the citizens. He tries to reassure the man that the citizens are in good hands, if only because Fujitora actually seems like a decent admiral.
‘It’s been three days and Mugiwara-ya has not yet woken up. But from the way I see it, he’s bound to wake up this morning and—’
Law pauses as he hears a loud call for meat and laughs a little at its odd timing.
The noise from the house is starting to pick up as the Strawhats can’t seem to choose between congratulating Luffy on his win, updating Luffy on the current situation with the marines, reprimanding Luffy for eating while sleeping, or consoling Luffy for being asleep when another of his older brothers has left the kingdom for a mission that he needs to partake in.
The morning is already starting to become far rowdier than what Law’s used to before he allied himself with the Strawhats. The noise inside the house is so contradicting with the peace and calm wheeling across the field due to the morning breeze, due to the sunlight poking Law in the cheeks with a surprisingly pleasant warmth, due to the colors which seem so radiant and so opposite of the darkness beneath the ocean.
Luffy’s laughter is as rumbunctious as he remembers it, as if the younger captain didn’t just cross the thin line between life and death a few days ago. As if he didn’t just bring down one of the biggest names both in the underground world and in piracy. As if he didn’t just save a kingdom from the thousands of strings controlled by a demon sitting on the crown in the guise of a dutiful King. Luffy’s laughter causes the morning to be even more raucous as time slowly ticks by.
And oddly enough, Law doesn’t really seem to mind.
‘Cora-san, can you keep this tiny little secret of mine?’
Law closes his eyes for a second and takes a deep breath before he twirls the pen on his hand, thinking about the next few things that he wants to admit to his adoptive father.
‘I think I’m falling in love.’
Law bites his lips and clenches the pen tightly in his hand to keep himself from striking through the sentence like a lovesick teenager having their first crush. He almost wants to laugh at the thought, for it isn’t such a far-fetched description considering how he has little to no experience when it comes to romantic relationships. After all, he spent most of his teenage life trying to get by day by day until he can finally fend for himself. Then he spent most of his adult life trying to outline the perfect plan to finally take Doflamingo down.
Law has absolutely no idea what a romantic love is all about.
Yet, every time he hears that laughter so loud and blaring yet so pure and genuine, Law feels the peace and warmth wrapping around him like an embrace.
Every time he hears that silly nickname uttered loudly in the middle of the deck, or whispered so softly in the middle of the night as he wills all the nightmares to go away, Law feels his stomach twisting and turning in all ways.
Every time he feels that presence by his side on nights when he can only stare into the darkness of the ocean, silently trying to forget about the monsters hunting him down in his dreams, Law starts to feel grounded and steady.
Every time he feels those calloused fingers running across his hand like there’s something about Law’s tattoos which warrants such homage and reverence, Law senses his nerves starting to betray him.
And every time he looks at that bright smile directed at him, Law feels shame for the sun or the moon or the stars because he thinks that no stellar structure will ever compare to the beauty and radiance of that smile.
Law doesn’t have a single idea about what a romantic love is all about, but every time he takes one look at Luffy, he starts to think—
Ah. So this is what falling in love is like.
Law wants to list down a thousand little reasons as to why he thinks that this must be him starting to fall in love, but he doesn’t. He has a thousand reasons or more, but what use is having those reasons when he knows that this is a feeling that he’s not allowed to have?
Because Law is a sinner—blood on his hands, more lives taken rather than saved, a myriad of sins from the past which he knows will be void of any redemption. If the concept of heaven and hell really do exist, then Law has long since abandoned the idea that he will ever get to see his family once again considering the number of deaths that follow his wake.
Law is a sinner; that much is certain. Yet this, by far, is probably the greatest sin of all.
Because there’s no way that Trafalgar Law is allowed to want someone as good as Monkey D. Luffy to stay by his side.
‘I think I’m falling in love, but I know he’s not someone that I’m allowed to have.
Not now, when my hands are already too stained to hold his.
Not ever, when there’s no salvation left for a kid long since been abandoned by the deities.’
So instead, Law lists down all the reasons he can think of as to why falling in love with Luffy is such a stupid and impertinent thing to do. He reminds Cora-san of his teenage years—of all the lives lost due to a certain teenager experimenting with his newfound abilities, of all the thoughts of revenge plaguing a certain unstable kid, of all the damages done in hopes of finding any information, of all the blood shed just for the sole purpose of exacting his retribution.
And among all other things, Law then tells Cora-san about why it feels so impudent to fall in love with one Monkey D. Luffy—he tells Cora-san about the gaping hole in his chest, the emptiness inside of him now that he has finally fulfilled his goal and death is nowhere near to be taking him.
Unlike Luffy, Law doesn’t have a dream.
‘I always knew that he was the opposite of me, the farthest person from being compatible with me.
But maybe, just maybe, that’s why it feels so easy to fall for that idiot.’
Because Luffy is not just a canvas full of bright colors painting a beguiling scenery. Luffy is the set of colors itself, a mishmash of different tinges and hues that it’s almost impossible to place him under one simple characterization. A persona so complex and intricated, but at the same time so simple and so oddly fascinating. A pigment which brings out the hidden ebullience of each person he encounters. A shade that exudes life and vigor everywhere he goes.
Law knows that Luffy is the one person whom heavens will forbid him from ever having, because they will never let their chosen one be tainted by a kid long since been forsaken.
Yet, despite being aware of all these reasons, a small part of Law keeps on wondering, keeps on asking and deliberating—
‘If the deities will never forgive me anyway for the myriad of sins that I’ve already done and committed, then what’s one more sin to add to that list?’
“Torao!! Found ‘ya!!”
Law looks up from his letter and shifts his gaze towards the direction of the voice. He should have known that the younger captain will not sit still as soon as he finishes what little supply of food did they manage to buy from the ruined city. Luffy immediately heads towards his direction and plops down beside him, eyeing the pieces of paper before tilting his head in question.
“What are ‘ya writing so early in the morning? Don’t tell me those are plans, Torao! Ugh. I’m sick of those.”
Law rolls his eyes at the younger captain’s remarks despite the chuckle which inevitably escapes him. He then flips the clipboard upside down to keep the younger captain from seeing all the embarrassing things written on the paper.
“A letter. To my adoptive father.”
A bright smile immediately makes its way towards the younger lad’s lips and Law tries his hardest not to look away—even when it’s too blinding, even when he thinks he doesn’t deserve it, even when a part of him aches whenever he sees it. Because among the billions of people across the whole world, who else is lucky enough to say that they’re personally privy to the infamous smile of one Monkey D. Luffy?
“That’s great! Are you done already? Where are you gonna send it? When? Oh! Can I come with you?” Luffy babbles on excitedly and Law can’t help the smile forming on his lips even when he knows that his next few words will only disappoint Luffy.
“I won’t send it.”
“What?! Why?!”
“I don’t think heaven accepts letters from a sinner like me.”
Law’s words are uttered in a manner so hushed it almost gets lost and taken away by the wind. Luffy looks at Law and keeps his silence for one, two, maybe three more seconds until his look finally softens with what Law can only assume as sympathy. Luffy takes a deep breath and nods in understanding.
“I see,” Luffy says as he leans against the brick wall, looking up at the sky like nothing about it blinds him. Law wonders if it’s because Luffy is so used to the brightness—having seen his reflection every day in front of the mirror.
For a few moments, the two of them is engulfed by nothing but the sound of the wind, by the chatters inside the house about their plans for the day, by the chirp of the birds actively flying around now that there’s no cage trying to pin them down. For a few moments, Law lets himself immerse in the unusual yet welcome silence from Luffy, until that silence is broken by the same man himself.
“Tell me about him.”
Law knows that he can simply say no, like how he always did whenever Luffy would ask him to do something. He knows that he can simply run away from the younger captain to avoid all his queries. Yet, a part of him longs for this. A part of him itches to share this part of the story.
A part of him feels overwhelmingly proud to finally be able to share the tale of one savior with another savior.
“Cora-san… well, he’s one of the stupidest people that I’ve ever met.”
Luffy chuckles at his remark, clearly understanding the meaning hidden behind the words of jeer and insults. When the younger keeps his silence afterwards, Law proceeds to tell him all about his time with Cora-san—about the time when Cora-san kept on literally kicking him out of the Family, only to find out later on that it was his way of trying to save Law from the grasp of his brother. About the time when he stabbed Cora-san and the latter didn’t even do anything to retaliate. About all the times when Cora-san would inevitably burn himself down. About all the times when Cora-san would use his power just so Law could have one night of soundless sleep.
“Cora-san was so annoying. He was so annoying, but…”
Then a melancholic smile forms on his lips as Law tells Luffy about the time when they escaped the Family—when Cora-san refused to give up on finding a cure for Law, when Cora-san kept on doing damage to the hospitals which rejected Law, when Cora-san cried for Law.
Law tells Luffy about the time when Cora-san kept on fighting for his sake even when Law had long since given up.
“I was already prepared to die anyway, but that idiot just wouldn’t let me.”
Law takes a moment to pause, gulping an imaginary lump on his throat as the ache starts to make itself apparent on his chest once again. He doesn’t know how long it takes him to compose himself, but Luffy is still waiting, still listening, so Law keeps on talking.
He tells Luffy about the fruit, the treasure chest, the seven rounds of bullets, and about how the silence that once made him feel at peace every night suddenly felt so suffocating. Law doesn’t even know if he’s still telling the story in a chronological order, or if the words aren’t as garbled as the memories are in his mind. Yet, Luffy keeps on listening and for some reason, Law starts to think that Luffy hears even the words of pain that he has no courage of ever admitting.
“He’s the only reason…” Law starts to say before he glances at the younger captain beside him and something inside of him stirs, reminding him of the past few days and of all the confessions written on his letter.
“He’s one of the reasons why I managed to live until today,” Law says instead to correct himself. Because Cora-san used to be the only reason why he’s still breathing. And now, Law adds another person on the list of people whom he owes his life to.
Luffy beams at him as if he can hear the words of gratitude behind that one silly statement. The younger lad heaves a sigh as the beam slowly turns into a small smile. Luffy closes his eyes for a moment, humming a little as he rocks himself a little from side to side, as if trying to mentally picture out the image of Cora-san that Law keeps on talking about.
“I wish I could’ve met him.”
Law smiles a little before he nods in agreement, because he knows that Cora-san would have loved to meet Luffy, even if it already sounds like a whole recipe for a big disaster. Law can already imagine things playing out—Cora-san fussing about meeting Luffy, trying to find a way as to how he can sneak Luffy inside a marine base, ordering a lot of food just so he can prepare a feast for Luffy, bringing out all the photo books where he keeps his stolen photos of Law, and then giving out at least one of those photo books to Luffy as a token of gratitude.
In his mind, there’s a picture painted in the brightest colors, with two of the brightest people whom Law has had the privilege to meet and be with.
Law wishes he could print a photo which only ever exists in his imagination.
“What did you tell him in the letter then?” Luffy bluntly asks, and Law is reminded of just how little privacy he can have whenever the Strawhat captain is involved.
The Surgeon keeps his silence for a moment and the younger captain simply waits for him. Luffy is fiddling with the edge of his vest, seemingly excited about what else will Law tell him about his adoptive father. After a few more seconds, Law opens his mouth to answer, but immediately shuts it.
Admitting to Luffy that Law is talking about him feels a little weird. Lying to Luffy feels even weirder for reasons unknown even to Law. Heaving out a sigh, Law then opts to form the words closest to the truth as possible.
“I told him about something that I badly wanted, but I know that I’m not allowed to have.”
Law doesn’t really know what he’s expecting as a response. He isn’t entirely sure if he’s expecting Luffy to not understand what he means, or if he’s expecting Luffy to just understand how awkward this is to talk about for him. Yet, Law surely knows that he isn’t expecting to hear Luffy’s laughter before the younger captain gently nudges him in the shoulder.
“You’re a pirate! Just do whatever the hell you want, silly Torao.”
Law lets out a scoff. Yeah, he really should have expected this.
“Even if it’s stupid?”
“Especially if it’s stupid.”
A wide grin forms on Luffy’s lips and Law starts to feel that this is probably one of those moments. The one where Luffy unknowingly paints another’s life with his own colors—not to override the colors badly plastered all across the canvas, not to wash away all the black and white which seems to dim the illustration, not to cover the shades which seem too dark and too in contrast with the brightness of that smile.
Law thinks that this is one of those moments where Luffy simply adds his own colors, simply tries to paint his own shade as a reminder that he’s there—right now, tomorrow, and in each and every other waking day of the Surgeon.
A simple reminder that Luffy will stay, always.
And then amidst the realization, amidst the silent admiration, and amidst the sound of his heart beating so loudly against his chest as a reminder of all the feelings still unconfessed—Luffy suddenly stands up and looks at Law. The younger captain stretches his hand towards Law with that bright smile still plastered across his face.
“Ne, Torao. Wanna do something stupid?”
Law takes a look at that rough and calloused hand, the hand which is far too pure for his own stained ones.
Cora-san… I’m sorry if I didn’t grow up like the good man that you probably wanted me to be.
The hand which he has only ever dreamed of holding, yet never had the courage to actually reach out to.
I’m sorry if I grew up to be a sinner and so unlike you.
The hand which he has always been afraid of tainting.
I’m sorry if I grew up with too much sins and blood on my hands. But…
The hand which pulled him out from his darkest confines almost a decade after Cora-san left him.
I think I’d still commit one of the biggest sins of my life.
“Sure, Luffy-ya.”
Law grins as he takes Luffy’s hand and lets the younger lad pull him up. For a few moments, all Law can do is to stare at the hand now holding his. All Law can do is to focus on the buzz which seems to run from their hands down to every nerve of Law’s body. All Law can do is to try and calm the wild thump, thump, thumping of his heart lest Luffy suddenly hears it. All Law can do is to try and stop the trembling of his hand against Luffy’s.
All Law can do is to ignore the thousands of reasons listed as to why holding Luffy’s hands is probably a sacrilege against all of the deities.
“Let’s go!!”
Luffy shouts out before suddenly pulling Law and running across the flower field. Law can’t help the chuckle that escapes his lips as he looks at the back of the person who refused to leave him alone, as he listens to the endless ramblings of the person who refused to give up on him, as he squeezes the hand of the person who refused to let him die.
Law is a sinner; that much is certain. Yet, as they run across the flower field like two kids lost in the beauty of the unknown, Law feels something build up inside of him; something that he has long since forgotten, something that he has long since thought he would never once again do in his entire life—
With Luffy, Law finally takes a leap of faith.