Chapter Text
The first time the Winter Soldier meets Darcy Lewis—in the common room of avengers’ tower, dancing around (poorly) to a song only she can hear—he dismisses her as not a threat and not a useful asset. Bucky Barnes agrees and would like to add that she has an amazing pair of tits. Winter Soldier argues that this fact is irrelevant even if it is true. For her part, Darcy Lewis catches him watching, smiles brightly, and pulls out the white cords trailing up to her ears.
The man named Steve Rogers smiles at her from his spot beside Winter Soldier and introduces her as Darcy Lewis, intern to Doctor Jane Foster, assistant to Pepper Potts, all around good gal.
“Esquire,” Darcy Lewis, intern to Doctor Jane Foster, assistant to Pepper Potts, and all around good gal adds.
“Esquire,” the man named Steve Rogers concedes with a nod and a grin. The Winter Soldier doesn’t think ‘esquire’ is actually part of her title. Bucky Barnes adds it on in their head anyway.
The second time Winter Soldier meets Darcy Lewis (esquire), she’s hiding inside of the kitchen cabinet. Winter Soldier did not think she was flexible enough to fit in the small cabinet. He reconsiders this as, clearly, she is. She puts a finger to her lips in the universal sign of ‘be quiet’. Bucky Barnes quirks an eyebrow at her.
“Shh,” she whispers unnecessarily, “I’m hiding from Clint.”
The Winter Soldier wants to ask why but is not used to asking questions and so he does not. Bucky Barnes must show some confusion because Darcy Lewis (esquire) gives him an answer anyway. Sort of.
“Two words. Tinfoil. Penises,” and then she reaches for the cabinet door and closes it before Bucky Barnes or the Winter Soldier can process this information. They let it go.
He doesn’t have time to open the cabinet back up and get the bowl he needed in the first place because the nearby ventilation cover opens near-silently and out slithers a near-silent Clint Barton.
He is covered in small, shiny cocks.
Bucky Barnes bursts out laughing and Winter Soldier grudgingly admits that this is very amusing. Clint Barton does not seem as amused.
“Do you know where Darcy is?” Clint Barton asks, a look of sworn vengeance on his face. Bucky Barnes subtly leans on the counter in front of the cabinet Darcy Lewis (esquire) is hiding in under the guise of catching his breath, guarding it from Clint Barton.
“Can’t say that I do,” Bucky Barnes answers, still smiling. Clint Barton narrows his eyes. The Winter Soldier narrows his right back. They stare at each other for approximately twenty-five seconds before the archer straightens and crosses his arms.
“Fine,” he concedes, “but if you see her, tell her she’s on my list…” The Winter Soldier takes note to find out which apartment Darcy Lewis (esquire) lives in and check its security measures even though Bucky Barnes assures him that this is just a harmless joke. A prank war. The Winter Soldier doubts that any war is harmless. Bucky Barnes agrees.
The archer narrows his eyes at them one more time before leaving the kitchen. From the hallway the Winter Soldier catches the loud, uncontrolled laughter of Steve Rogers. Bucky Barnes smiles again. He’d missed the sound of Steve Rogers’ laughter.
Steve comes into the kitchen wiping tears from his eyes.
“Whoo, boy. Did you see Clint? Please, tell me you saw Clint.” He chuckles while thumbing over his shoulder. Bucky Barnes nods, grinning from ear to ear.
“I’m guessing Darcy did that,” Steve continues, “Oh, man. Clint really didn’t know what he was getting into with this, huh? Hey, where is Darcy anyway? JARVIS?”
“Miss Lewis is in the common floor kitchen, Captain Rogers,” the cool British voice informs them. Steve looks around confused. Bucky Barnes smiles again and the Winter Soldier confirms that Clint Barton is far enough away that he can now give away Darcy Lewis’ position without putting her in danger.
Bucky Barnes takes two steps to his left and opens the cabinet behind him without looking.
Bucky Barnes wishes he had a camera to capture the look on Steve Rogers’ face right now. Steve Rogers starts laughing again as Darcy Lewis (esquire) crawls out of the cabinet and stumbles to the floor with the help of Bucky Barnes. She rights her clothes and sends Bucky Barnes a wink before scurrying away. Steve Rogers high-fives her on her way out.